Soty



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    “Ilya, what are we gonna do?” Shane says.

    Ilya finishes whatever he has been doing on his phone, and tosses it gently to the bed beside him. He crosses the room to Shane, stands in front of him, squeezes into his shoulders with his big hands, rubbing them like he means to warm them up.

    “Looks like we will have a little vacation,” he says, with a big obnoxious grin.

     


     

    Boston and Montreal are sent to Paris to play against each other in an exhibition series in January 2017. Ilya and Shane decide to stay in Paris for one more night. Just one more night, so they can talk. Maybe finally understand each other.

    They aren't expecting a volcano to erupt in Iceland and close all the airspace in Europe, leaving them stranded there. Together.

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    23 Jun 2026

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    Shane could deny it – he could try to pretend the man in the audio whimpering for more isn’t him, that it’s a scam, that it was fake or edited. He could get lawyers involved, or take it to the press before anything leaks and control the narrative himself. But he doesn’t know how much more the blackmailer has, and he can’t risk Ilya getting outed or deported or – well, he can’t risk Ilya.
    *Shane and Ilya don't get caught at the cottage. But they still get caught.

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    24 May 2026

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    "Can't find any men your own age?" Ilya teased.

    "Don't want to," Shane breathlessly replied. Ilya's hands stilled for a moment.

    "Oh yeah? Need an older man to treat you right, baby?"

    "Yeah, daddy, I do," he whispered, timid to commit to full volume.

    Shane answers a booty call from a much older Ilya on Grindr.

    Series
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    17 May 2026

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    Haley
    Hi Shane! Just messaging about our heater again. Do you think we could get it fixed today?
    Shane
    So sorry for the late reply, Haley! I’m at the Olympics and my time zones are all messed up. Messaged my HVAC guy and he’ll be there in the morning.

    Haley
    screenshot.jpg
    Wtf?
    Katie
    Is this guy fr???

    Or: the trials and tribulations of renting from Shane Hollander.

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    12 May 2026

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    Wyatt’s gaze flicked from Hollander to Rozanov – who looked absolutely delighted with this turn of events – and back again. “You two follow playoff traditions as well then?”

    Hollander shrugged, still catastrophically casual, “I mean, when we played on different teams we sort of had to. Conflict of interests and all that. But I meant more generally. You know what it’s like, right?”

    Wyatt wasn’t sure that he did, and was suddenly very conscious of the fact that he might not be in the least bit emotionally prepared for whatever was about to come out of Hollander’s mouth.

    “Like, the other day,” Hollander continued, seemingly unaware of the proverbial bombshell he was about to drop. “Ilya tied me up and edged me for…was it two hours?”

    “Three, moyo solnyshko,” Rozanov corrected, sounding like Christmas, his birthday, and the Easter Bunny had all come at once.


    Shane Hollander joins the Centaurs, and the team discovers that their Captain might be a certified menace, but his husband is so, so much worse.

    OR: five times Shane accidentally terrorizes the Centaurs locker room, and one time he chooses to hold back.

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    28 Apr 2026