5 Works by ThomasTheMemeEngine

Listing Works

  1. Tags
    Summary

    Julian nodded politely while twirling the bejeweled cross which hung from his neck. He hated them; those fits of immorality during which his mind would wander and conjure up indecencies. Those corporal needs of his were devious, left him high-strung — him of all people. The man whose birthright was to own, demand and conquer. And yet, here he was: cowering for approval, hoping he could, perhaps, inspire something similar to his own zest.

    The Prince was irritated. With his weakness and, and above all, with that damned knight.

    “I would like to be compensated for my efforts.”, the noble stated coolly, feeling gravely defensive of his honor.

    His regal command noticeably soured Geralt’s mood. “Certainly, your Highness.”, he grumbled.

    ______

    In which the kingdom's darling boy has strange ways of showing his fondness for a grouchy knight.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,888
    Chapters:
    1/?
    Comments:
    8
    Kudos:
    46
    Bookmarks:
    6
    Hits:
    366
  2. Tags
    Summary

    A Mandalorian. Of course. It all made sense. That apprehension to show his face, the T-shaped visor, his armor... Jaskier retracted his hands as if he'd dipped them in acid.

    He recovered someone from an ancient clan of warriors.

    His initial awe was brief, though.

    "Wait! I don't care who you are!", Jaskier bellowed, loud enough enough to make the seasoned fighter flinch. "You're dying and I'll help you, whether you want it or not! I don't care who you failed or what your mission is. That stupid helmet's gotta–" He completed his monologue with an undignified yelp because a laser beam flew right by his face and missed him by a hair's breadth.

    ______

    A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away a musician found an injured Mandalorian under the strangest circumstances possible. An encounter which would change both of their lives. The universe *did* work in mysterious ways, after all...

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,609
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    190
    Bookmarks:
    25
    Hits:
    1,372
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Jaskier was of noble descent. The way he spoke drove Geralt up the wall. But, luckily, he wouldn't have to deal with that for much longer. He spun around to face the source of all that irritating noise. It was hardly worth it, because he almost fell off by simply doing so. The piece of wood under his legs began to wobble. He was just evading the inevitable, though.

    "With all due respect, Cap'n, it was your idea to have me walk the plank.", he remarked, level-headed. Not that it mattered, but still.

    ______

    Jaskier, an eccentric pirate Captain with a flair for the dramatic, is brave enough to kiss the bounty hunter who's after his head. Geralt, however, just *really* needs some coin and wishes he had chosen a simpler target. A little Tom and Jerry-esque, if you will.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,903
    Chapters:
    5/?
    Comments:
    31
    Kudos:
    174
    Bookmarks:
    25
    Hits:
    1,856
  4. Tags
    Summary

    "That your costume, I assume? Still won't tell me what your show is all about?"

    Jaskier chuckled in response. "I can't with your prying." He slipped into a purple, flowy shirt and the glamerous doublet. "Must I really repeat myself again? It's bad luck to reveal too much of a play. It's tinged with a, how do you say... religious zeal, if that's what you're wondering. Supposed to teach the commonfolk a thing or two about morality."

    ______

    Jaskier finds an allegory for his complicated relationship with the witcher.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,157
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    4
    Kudos:
    52
    Bookmarks:
    4
    Hits:
    206
  5. Tags
    Summary

    When Teru found himself face to face with a domesticated six-inch spider that possessed enough hairs on its thick, abominable legs to make any of his wigs jealous he knew, he should have seen it coming.

    The signs had been there all along.

    ______

    Mob gets a pet. Teru gets nervous.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,198
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Comments:
    77
    Kudos:
    472
    Bookmarks:
    58
    Hits:
    3,922

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