13 Works by WestFunction
Listing Works
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Summary
“I’d like you to try not to speak from now on, unless I ask for it explicitly,” he said, rubbing her back. “With the exception of one thing, which you will say if you simply can’t take any more and you want me to stop.”
“What thing,” she murmured.
He leaned down beside her ear. She stopped her struggling.
“Magic underwear."
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Sister Paxton decides not to stab Mr. Reed in the cellar.
School is back in. -
That's the Way Nature Made It by WestFunction for HeartOfTheCountry
Fandoms: Lolita (1962), Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
19 Jul 2024
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“—Vivian, what a swell name. Vivian, that’s a lovely little rising-and-falling, teeth-on-the-lips sort of name. Serpents and Venus. It’s evocative. Masculine. I know, I’ve seen your stories in the papers. Tremendous stuff. You like to straddle the edge, don’t you? Have you ever acted? No? Pity, pity…”
Clare Quilty meets his future business partner Vivian Darkbloom for the first time in a hotel.
They work something out. -
Mille e quattro by WestFunction
Fandoms: Don Giovanni - Mozart/Da Ponte, Dom Juan - Molière
26 May 2024
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“Sometimes,” the Don continued, “when I was with a woman, you know, I thought I heard you outside the window, making noises. I let you think I didn’t hear you, to spare what little dignity you still had. But when I was with men, I still heard you sighing. And that gave me some very interesting ideas… Oh, don’t turn away and be coy with me. I know you’ve had such thoughts, Leporello – haven’t you?”
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Or, Leporello corrects an error in his catalogue.
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Greenmote, If You Please, Haskill by WestFunction
Fandoms: Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion, Elder Scrolls
03 Dec 2023
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"Come again?"
"...Self-gratification, my Lord."
"Flaying the worm, you mean?" they asked. "Peeling the carrot? Spearing the bearded clam?"
Haskill closed his eyes and breathed in through his nose.
"If that is how You wish to phrase it, my Lord," he relented, looking pained.
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The Hero of Kvatch has been having a few growing pains as they evolve into the Mad God.
Thankfully, their Chamberlain is there to help. -
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“Finally!” Mellori said. “That ‘Essence recharging’ took a long time. I was starting to think you two would never come back.”
She paused, raising an eyebrow.
“Wait a minute… Wizard, why are you wearing Bat’s clothes?”
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"When an irresistible force, such as you
Meets an old immovable object, like me..."The courier thinks something is wrong with Yes Man's AI. They try their best to ignore it.
...Until they can't.
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The (smart) home is where the heart is.
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Nurse Cherry (full-time nurse, part-time bartender) has a tricky patient. He decides to work on - er, with them.
After hours.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,651
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 6
- Hits:
- 225
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Summary
The Pirate and their crew are on a mission - to sabotage the artillery on Beachhead, the massive Sky Station constructed by Bishop. But a mishap with one of his concoctions sends the Pirate into the laboratory of the Mad Tinkerer himself... to be experimented on.
Series
- Part 3 of Malfunctions
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It's our pirate's big shot: the assassination of Rooke, Grand Admiral of the Armada. But a surprise appearance by Deacon leaves the pirate in a tight spot, and the Spymaster's modus operandi - capture the pirate at all costs - takes on an interesting meaning in an intimate setting.
Series
- Part 2 of Malfunctions
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The Steam Mistress' End (Y!Kane x Steam Mistress(Fem!Reader)) by WestFunction for ChickenRice10
Fandoms: Pirate101 (Video Game)
29 Aug 2020
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The Steam Mistress' blood holds the power to fuel any machine or clockwork. This makes her, and her blood, highly sought-after in the skyways of the Spiral.
Kane, the leader of the Armada, plans to capture the Steam Mistress and complete himself in the land of El Dorado. Now that he has the final piece of his Grand Design, nothing stands in his way ... but himself.THIS IS NOT MY ORIGINAL PREMISE! This is a continuation of the wonderful story "The Steam Mistress" by DJFire102, which currently has no ending. The Steam Mistress, Sir Guiart, Grandfather Clocksworth and the general plot of the fic all belong to DJFire102. Please go read the original work at https://archiveofourown.org/works/20848007.
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In the style of Lovecraft's original short stories, an assistant details the mysterious disappearance of his partner, Herbert West. Paranoia, gunshots, the deed to the house of a dead woman - and those nighttime visitors! - it's enough to make his assistant go mad with frustration. Though eager to please West, he gets more than he bargained for during an experiment gone wrong ...
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In the guise of a clockwork Armada soldier, our pirate enters the tomb of Marco Pollo, seeking the piece of the map to El Dorado. Their plan halts when they come face-to-face with Kane, the Armada's leader, who summons them back to his cabin for ... maintenance.
Series
- Part 1 of Malfunctions