admirermind
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why do i fear becoming a river. (which mountain gave me such shame.) by downintheflames
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
14 Nov 2025
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“Fuck it,” Eddie mumbled before unlocking the phone again and opening his text thread with Buck. They hadn’t texted since Buck asked him if he wanted a scone or a danish from their favorite coffee shop before their last shift. Eddie sighed and pressed the corner of the phone against his forehead.
He didn’t want to ask for help. He could spend another hour circling around the city. But he didn’t want to. He wanted this awful horrible day to be done. He wanted to hold his child and pretend for a little bit that everything was still whole. He sighed again before pressing call and pressing the phone to his ear.
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Eddie finally asks for what he needs in the aftermath of the sudden loss of his Abuela. Buck finally stops running from his grief. And then Eddie’s parents show up.
Bookmarked by admirermind
15 Nov 2025
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“You don’t have to,” Buck says quickly. “You could just leave it. Don’t look.”
Eddie glances up at him, and they both know without saying it that he isn’t going to let this go.
There’s no way he can look away now, not after seeing the way Buck reacted.
“Or maybe just not now,” Buck says softly, stepping closer, his hand settling gently over the screen like he can shield Eddie from what’s on it. “Maybe leave it for now. You’re not… Eddie, you’re not doing well right now. I’ve been so worried about you and this—” his voice catches, “—you… Eddie, please don’t. Just leave it.”
It stings to hear the worry out loud, even if he knew it was there.
He wants to do what Buck says, he wants to trust his friend and give him what he’s asking.
Buck never asks for anything.
Eddie moves Buck’s hand aside gently, giving it a brief squeeze. “Can’t do that, Buck.”
Or; After Christopher leaves for El Paso, Buck decides that he and Eddie should trace their family trees to keep Eddie’s mind occupied elsewhere. The results lead Eddie to face a family secret.
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Bookmarked by admirermind
29 Oct 2025
Bookmarker's Notes
best one i’ve read in a really long time. eddie focus <3
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She turns to Eddie and says something else, but Buck is busy fighting the headrush he gets at the sound of Ana Flores calling Eddie and Christopher 'the boys'. Like they belong to her already.
God, what’s wrong with him? What is this?
or, eddie cooks, chris domesticates a slug, and buck tries to figure out why he hates his best friend's girlfriend. to everyone's immense shock and surprise, it goes badly.
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“His shirt’s on inside out,” Josh commented to Linda. Eddie opened the door to the breakroom and tried to let it close behind him, but that did not deter either of his colleagues. “Is this a walk of shame?”
“Well, I am walking,” Eddie confirmed, rounding the counter and beelining to the empty coffee pot. “And full of shame.”
“What happened?”
“I stood him up,” he answered, shortly.
After what was probably a very involved silent conversation between Linda and Josh, Josh said, “Eddie, if you aren’t ready, I’m sure he’d understand.”
“I am ready,” he said, detaching the water reservoir with more force than necessary. “I didn’t do it on purpose.”
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Eddie Diaz has been trying to get Firefighter Buckley to agree to a date for the last two months; so no one is more surprised than he is when he finally gets a chance—and blows it.
Or: Dispatchers Eddie and Maddie are both looking for a second chance. They just don't realize they want one from the same person.
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Bookmarked by admirermind
24 Aug 2025
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Eddie is made of shattered glass. Not like a mosaic - not something broken made beautiful. No, Eddie is all sharp points and jagged edges; he’s hurt everyone that’s ever tried to hold him.
But Buck…Buck holds him like it’s easy. Like there’s nothing else in the world he would rather be doing. He holds Eddie like he’s precious, cradling him between gentle hands with a kind of reverence that is usually reserved for something holy. Something god-like. And then Eddie catches a glimpse of him and Buck in the mirror next to Buck’s bed, and he thinks oh. He thinks maybe this is as close to heaven as a man like him will ever get.
So no one can blame him for wanting to enjoy it while it lasts.