chirpeeks
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“Looking good, Scarface,” Buck says, and he’s acutely aware of how breathless he sounds.
“Not so bad yourself, cowboy,” Eddie remarks, his eyes trailing up and down the length of Buck’s body yet again.
For a second, they’re the only two people in the room. The only two people in the whole world. The way that Eddie is looking at him - the approval in his eyes, the smirk teasing at the corners of his mouth - it feels like. Like something. It feels like a moment, maybe. Something stolen, right beneath the noses of all of their friends and family.
And then there’s the clearing of a throat, and Buck feels a shoulder bumping into his. It jolts him out of the moment, and he turns to look at the man standing next to him. His boyfriend.
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Eddie was kind to a fault; if Buck just asked to be held for a little while, Eddie would probably indulge him. But a ‘probably’ wasn’t certain enough for his liking and Buck couldn’t handle another crushing blow tonight, both literally and figuratively. Tonight, he just wanted to pretend for one last time that Eddie was his in all the ways he wanted him to be and bask in the feeling of being held and safe in his arms.
Besides, Buck loved sex, he really did. And maybe he wasn’t exactly in the mood for it right now, but once he was in the moment he was sure he’d get there with a little help. But even if he didn’t, it would hardly be a hardship to go through with it anyway to fast forward things to the cuddling afterglow he was desperately craving. He always enjoyed pleasing his partners, even if he didn’t get anything in return himself and he had enough experience in playing his cards right with others to make sure that Eddie wouldn’t even be able to tell the difference. None of his previous hookups ever did, or maybe they just didn’t care. It was sex they wanted from him, after all.
And as far as Buck was concerned, sex was the price of admission he was always more than happy to pay.
Bookmarked by chirpeeks
01 Jan 2025
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After waking up, all Buck can think about is all those moments that seemed so absolutely new to Eddie. And he gets what Tommy was saying. At least Buck is bisexual; he’d discovered new parts to his sexuality, but what he’d experienced so far had been good too. Eddie had never even kissed a person of his preferred gender before Buck, and Buck’s talking about settling down and marriage and- and expecting him to just commit the rest of his life to him? Without even letting him shop around a little?
He thinks about 19-year-old Eddie trapped in a marriage with a woman he convinced himself he was in love with just because he never had the opportunity to explore what he really liked.
And he just- he doesn’t want to be that for Eddie. He’s grateful to be Eddie’s first, but he needs to be Eddie’s last.
Eddie and Buck get together, and Buck spirals about 'trapping' Eddie in their relationship. He attempts to solve this by being very, very, stupid - and trying to subtly encourage that Eddie cheat on him.
[This work can be read without the preceding smutty get-together fic.]
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Bookmarked by chirpeeks
01 Jan 2025
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Healing after a truck bombing, breakup, pulmonary embolism, tsunami and lawsuit is a slow process when you're afraid to talk to your team when it feels like the world is crumbling in on you. Finding your way out of the crippling darkness is a lonely process when you're afraid you'll get benched again for something beyond your control. Learning to love again is a terrifying process when you're not sure your best friend will ever truly forgive you.
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- English
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- 151,278
- Chapters:
- 36/36
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- 2
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Bookmarked by chirpeeks
30 Dec 2024
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Eddie can’t move. Like this, Buck is illuminated by the sunlight streaming through the window; dust motes shimmering around his head, his hair haloed in gold. Beautiful, Eddie thinks. And to his surprise, he doesn’t feel any sort of guilt about doing so.
Except — he should. Because Buck is dating Tommy, and he’s happy, and Eddie would rather go to his grave repressed and miserable than ever take away from Buck’s happiness.
Or: Eddie starts to untangle his complicated feelings about himself, and Buck. Mainly Buck.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 56,474
- Chapters:
- 4/4
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- 458
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Bookmarked by chirpeeks
18 Dec 2024