1 - 20 of 69 Works by fallingthorns
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When Bobby enters the hospital room, he’s expecting chaos. Chaos, crying, nurses and doctors running around, monitors beeping. He’s expecting to see Buck with a clipboard and Eddie pacing. They’ve been waiting for this day for nine months now – longer, if you count the planning, and even longer still if you count the time Bobby was waiting for Buck and Eddie to pull themselves together – and it almost doesn’t seem real now that it’s here.
So, yes, Bobby expects chaos, as he usually does when Buck or Eddie or any others from their little family are involved.
Instead, what he finds is peace.
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Or, the future as it should be. -
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Eddie feels his own eyes prickling as Buck’s cries turn into heavier sobs, his breath gasping between each as if there’s not enough oxygen in the world.
“Eddie,” his fingers are clenching at Eddie’s shirt now, holding him tighter, closer. “Eddie, why – why –”
“I don’t know,” Eddie whispers into his hair, lips grazing along Buck’s hairline with every word. “I don’t know. I’m so sorry.”
“And – and you –” Buck trails off, even though Eddie desperately wants to hear what Buck has to say. He wants Buck to yell at him and tell him off for leaving, wants him to scream at him for being a terrible friend just so Eddie can feel – something. Anything. “You came back.”
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Or, Buck breaks down. -
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Eddie’s eyes are wide, and the instant Buck looks over at him, pointing right at Eddie as he sings the lyric, he feels his cheeks turning red and hot. He looks everywhere but at Buck because – because what is Buck doing?
He makes the mistake of looking at Hen, and her eyebrow is raised right at him. He’s not sure if she’s even glanced at Buck a single time since he started singing. Eddie can’t look at her, and he can’t look at Buck, especially when Buck is singing a song about loving himself – which is great, really, because Buck deserves to actually like himself for once – but Eddie can guarantee that Buck is probably doing some hip movements that will send him to the floor.
“Um,” Eddie stammers, and then he’s bolting out of the booth, up and over Chimney’s lap in a very ungraceful manner, and shooting to the bathroom without another word.
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Or, at both the bachelor party and the wedding reception, Buck looks at Eddie. -
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Because Buck thinks he could build something with Tommy. He could love Tommy, if he put his mind to it. Tommy is fun, and serious, and competent and good at his job and he is really good in bed and with his mouth. He could love him.
He could. And maybe he even would, if he didn’t already –
He screeches to a halt at the next red light, almost missing it as the images race through his mind. An image of Buck himself digging through the mud, calling and calling the name of a man buried beneath feet of dirt, the name of a man that couldn’t hear him. He feels his heart breaking as Bobby grabs him, as Buck sobs into the sky.
Buck blinks and realizes that he could love Tommy, if he didn't already love Eddie.
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Eddie has not stopped talking since they left the restaurant. He thinks that he kind of blacked out during the actual dinner, because he’s not really sure what actually was discussed or how they even ended up sitting next to Buck and Tommy. But as soon as they got back into the truck, it was like the dam breaking loose.
“I mean, it’s so great,” Eddie says once they’re back in his bedroom, as he takes his shirt off in the closet. He’s not even paying attention as Marisol perches on the edge of his bed. “They’re two of my friends, it’s awesome.”
He’s happy for Buck, because Buck deserves to be with someone who gets him and will love him like he deserves. He just . . .
“Is Tommy too tall for him?” Eddie asks. “Like, they’re the same height.”
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Buck turns to look towards the truck then, and Eddie sees the exact moment that Buck clocks him. His face lights up into a wide smile, his whole body shining in the pink glow as he stands taller, his shoulders wider as he raises a hand to wave at him, and Eddie can practically see the joy radiating off of him.
Eddie feels himself smiling back automatically. He wants to get out, wants to run to him and get down on both knees and tell Buck that he is all he needs, all he wants. He wants to tell Buck that he can stop looking because Eddie is here, Eddie knows him and wants him and loves --
Eddie freezes, hands gripping the steering wheel again.
Because Eddie loves him.
And Eddie promptly flips the car into reverse and peels out of the parking lot before Buck gets to the truck.
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Hen's hands are shaking, her mouth slightly parted as she watches them bring Eddie back. She hears so many different words – shock and electrocution and burns on hands and cardiac arrest – but she doesn’t need to hear any of them to know.
She knows that Eddie would prioritize Buck over himself, always, even if he, too, had been struck by lightning.
Because Eddie was on the ladder, too. And lightning always strikes twice.
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Chris continues to chatter in Eddie’s ear, and Eddie half listens as Buck goes up to Margaret and hands her the tape measurer he’d been holding. She stares at him with one tape measurer in each hand now, eyebrows drawn in confusion as he smiles and waves goodbye at her.
“See you later!” Buck calls as he exits the loft with Chris.
Eddie is only a few feet behind, but he looks at her, gives her a polite but fake smile, and says, “See you later, Maggie!” as he closes the door. He only catches the first half of her spluttering and protest of the name as the door shuts behind him.
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Or, Eddie finds out Margaret Buckley wants to buy Buck a couch and thinks, fuck that. -
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Buck startles awake to Chris prying his eye open. Chris’s concerned expression swims into his vision as both eyes adjust, squinting at the morning sun streaming in through the window.
“You’ve been sleeping for fourteen hours,” Chris deadpans. Buck is still half asleep, but he catches the slight waver in his voice, can see his eyebrows furrowed as he watches Buck carefully. “You went to bed at seven last night, and now it’s nine in the morning.”
“Nine in the morning, huh?” Buck’s own voice resembles more of a croak as he sits up, muscles aching and head still throbbing. It’s all a result of being struck by lightning and in a coma for a few days, he knows, but that doesn’t mean he has to like it.
But what he does like is the smell of Eddie’s sheets, the pictures of him and Eddie and Chris on Eddie’s bedroom walls. He likes the feeling of Eddie’s arms around him in the middle of the night, making sure that he’s okay and breathing.
“Christopher.” Eddie’s voice hisses through the crack in the bedroom door. “I told you not to bother him.”
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Or, Buck recovers and doesn't quite realize what he means to others. -
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He presses Buck’s hand into his forehead and breathes in the scent of antiseptic that lingers on Buck’s skin. He doesn't understand how he missed so many clues, doesn't know how he's been so clueless. But he thinks that some part of him did know that he was in love with Buck, because he put him in his will and made him Christopher’s guardian. Some part of him, deep down, knew what Eddie himself didn’t even realize.
He exhales and squeezes Buck’s hand again. It’s not supposed to be like this – the will doesn’t cover this. It was never supposed to be Buck that goes first.
“Bobby,” he whispers, voice cracking as he closes his eyes against the dorsum of Buck’s hand again. “What am I going to do?”
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Or, in the hospital, Eddie waits, and thinks, and dreams. -
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The sun is pink in the horizon, just starting its descent and emitting a light glow across the smooth expanse of snow. Everything is lit up pink and purple and orange, and when he glances over at Eddie, Eddie’s green coat is reflecting the light, illuminating his face and making him look like a dream. Buck has to glance away and ignores the skipping of his heart.
Eddie is silent next to him. All Buck can hear are their skis against the snow, their poles pinging with every push forward. And when he glances at Eddie again, it’s to find Eddie already looking at him with a soft smile.
“What?” He asks, frowning and examining his own shadow to see if something is off.
Eddie just shakes his head. “Nothing,” he replies quietly. “I just . . .” Eddie trails off and looks back into the distance, and Buck so badly wants him to finish his sentence.
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Or, Buck inherits a house in a small ski town, reunites with his sister, saves a restaurant, falls in love, and finds a family, but not necessarily in that order. -
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Because Eddie is built. There’s no denying it now, not when the proof is right in front of Buck and Buck is actually paying attention. Eddie has obviously been stepping up his workout regimen since returning to the 118, and Buck feels a little weak at the knees as several realizations come crashing down on him at once.
The first is that Eddie is hot. This isn’t really breaking news to him, but the intensity of it is startling.
The second, however, does startle him, and it’s that he’s pretty sure he’s in love with Eddie.
“Buckley,” Eddie huffs, breaking Buck out of his thoughts when Buck was obviously standing in silence for too long. “My eyes are up here.”
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Buck glances at Eddie’s bedroom door one more time, almost like he’s willing it to open. But the door stays mostly closed and Buck feels himself deflate as he grabs his bag and keys.
He quietly closes the door and locks it behind him, and he’s just about to turn the car on when he frowns and realizes that he left his jacket in the house. He knows he’ll probably be back at some point tomorrow to get it, but he thinks about Eddie under all that mud. He thinks of his head on Bobby’s lap and Eddie’s name on his lips, screamed into the air. He felt –
He felt like his whole soul was being buried under the mud, and that’s what scares him the most.
Sighing, he gets out of the Jeep and decides to get his jacket, and if he happens to listen for any signs of movement from Eddie’s room for a few more seconds before he leaves again, then that’s between Buck and God.
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Or, Buck lingers until he finally stays. -
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Eddie clears his throat, shifting his eyes from Buck’s hands and chest and up to Buck’s face, because he absolutely wasn’t checking out his best friend while he was holding a tiny kitten.
“Eddie,” Buck’s voice is urgent, his hands uncurling to reveal the tiny, fluffy black kitten with white socks. “She looks like Bobby.”
Eddie blinks at the kitten for a long moment, because he has no idea how Buck is making that kind of connection.
“She has Bobby’s eyes,” Buck insists, turning the kitten to look at him again. “Not in color, obviously, but in attitude. The vibes.”
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Or, the one where Eddie sees Buck with a small kitten, realizes he’s in love, and spontaneously combusts, but not necessarily in that order. -
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“Are you happy?” Buck hears himself ask, the words slipping through without passing his brain-to-mouth filter.
Eddie hums. “Most of the time.”
Buck just nods in reply, picking at the label of his beer.
“Are you happy?” Eddie asks him, voice quiet in the night, and when Buck glances over, his eyes are a little red and glassy.
Buck lets out a breath and shakes his head. “Not even half of the time.”
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Or, the one where Eddie's getting married, but not to Buck, and Buck is not a selfish man. -
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Eddie’s a steady man who likes predictability. He buys the same beer all the time, the same shirts just in different colors, the same type of mulch for the garden every year.
But the thing is, Chris is starting high school in two weeks, and Bobby has been floating the idea of retirement around more and more. Chim and Maddie are expecting a second baby, and Pepa and Abuela have been talking of looking for a new home for Abuela soon.
And then there’s the promotion and the transfer, and it’s all just a bit much for Eddie to handle.
But he spins the silicone ring on his finger, smiling down at it while the heat of Buck’s thigh presses carefully into his own. At least that’s something that isn’t changing.
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Or, even when everything changes, some things stay the same. -
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Buck smiles as Eddie leans in and presses a soft kiss to his lips, and Buck feels himself grinning further against his mouth and kissing back before Eddie pulls away, too soon and with that same soft smile on his lips. He eases the bags fully out of Buck’s arms and turns to head into the kitchen, and Buck watches him go with such a fond smile that he feels like he’s going to explode.
And then he freezes and stares at Eddie’s retreating form, his heart constricting in his chest as his brain struggles to catch up with the events of the last twenty seconds. Because kissing? Is not something they have ever done before.
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Buck opens his door on the Saturday morning before Father’s Day, fully prepared for the long trek down to the mailroom, but he’s stopped in his tracks by something on the floor. He frowns down at the ground, because there’s a small, potted cactus right in front of his door, and he’s about 95% sure he didn’t leave it there. He groans as he bends down to pick it up, carefully balancing on his crutches while his fingers fumble with the small envelope attached to the cactus.
Chris says thanks for the help and Happy Father’s Day. He wanted to get this for you because it’s small like him but won’t die since you’re a little slow right now. – Eddie
Buck blinks back the sudden onslaught of tears that prickle in his eyes, the words swarming his vision before he takes the cactus into the living room and sets it on the middle of the coffee table. His heart flips in his chest once, twice, and by the third flip, he knows for sure what it means.
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Or, Father's Day throughout the years. -
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He’s seen Buck with kids, of course. Buck is, truly, just the best with kids, and this isn’t news to Eddie.
What is news to Eddie, though, is how Buck looks with a whole gaggle of small children fawning at his feet. They don’t even come up to his knees, because Buck’s legs are, unfortunately, approximately five miles long. Half of them are running around him in circles, a few of them are sitting in the grass picking dandelions, and Jee and one other toddler have secured themselves to Buck’s legs like two koalas. Buck is grinning down at them and laughing while still keeping an eye on those running around, and Eddie very suddenly feels like he needs to get down on one knee and propose.
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Or, the one where Eddie sees Buck with small children and spontaneously combusts. -
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Buck blinks at her, mouth opening and closing, unsure of what to say. He kind of wishes he was back in his old mindset of noticing nobody but Eddie, because his world was really decidedly quieter.
Eddie comes into the loft then, shoulders forward and head dropped as he looks down at his phone.
“Oh my god,” Buck wheezes into his hands. “Everyone just –”
Eddie freezes in his steps, looking between Buck and Hen with wide eyes. “Babe,” Eddie says slowly, taking a few cautious steps towards him. “What . . . ?”
“He’s finally realized that we’re all annoying,” Hen grins.
He feels Eddie run a hand through his hair, followed by the soft press of lips onto the back of his head. “I hate to break it to you, baby,” he says quietly into Buck’s hair. “But we’ve always been annoying.”
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Or, Eddie has bad posture, Buck is a mouth-breather, and the rest of the 118 all have a thing, too.