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should've left my phone at home ('cause this is a disaster) by shinealightonme for two_of_swords
Fandoms: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
10 May 2018
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Summary
Most of the interesting customers that Adam meets are terrible interesting rather than fun interesting.
The hot guy who can't keep a cell phone alive might be both.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 4,504
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 124
- Kudos:
- 2,776
- Bookmarks:
- 465
- Hits:
- 18,114
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
02 Jul 2025
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Summary
Sanji stares up at the screen that lists all inbound and outbound flights, his heart catching in his throat when he spots the little flag that says ‘canceled’ next to his own.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,111
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 170
- Kudos:
- 3,410
- Bookmarks:
- 530
- Hits:
- 18,170
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
28 Jun 2025
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Summary
The thing about Roronoa Zoro is, he's the perfect example of a very stereotypical jock. He's buff, he spends most of his free time doing sports and he's pretty popular around campus. People know him by name and reputation even when they have never talked to him once. Just like Sanji.
That alone shouldn't be confusing. Sanji is the first one to admit that buff men can be very gorgeous and that there is no harm in appreciating them. It doesn't surprise him that someone like Roronoa Zoro, who has the body of a male adonis, is the conversation topic all over campus.
Only, that's not really what people talk about when they mention his name because, above all, Roronoa Zoro has the reputation of being a bully.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,877
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 12
- Kudos:
- 346
- Bookmarks:
- 57
- Hits:
- 2,444
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
27 Jun 2025
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Summary
So that’s how it starts, but it is not, unfortunately, how it ends. Mainly because it doesn’t end, that is. It keeps happening, often multiple times a week, and before he knows it Sanji’s been letting a piece of potentially sentient plant life into his pants for going on two months. He can only assume it’s a result of taking one too many hits to the head.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 17,604
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 199
- Kudos:
- 5,081
- Bookmarks:
- 864
- Hits:
- 38,262
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
24 Jun 2025
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Summary
Zoro thinks he’s a pretty loyal person. All things considered, he’s a faithful crewmember and swordsman of the Strawhat Pirates.
Zoro looks up just in time to see Luffy launching himself at Sanji, wrapping his stretched limbs all over Sanji’s body. Sanji has just walked out of the galley carrying a plate full of fancy-looking drinks and he’s extending his arm as far away as possible from Luffy’s grasp, and Luffy leans over his shoulder, their cheeks pressed against each other’s, their lips almost touching —
Zoro is seriously considering mutiny.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,543
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 111
- Kudos:
- 11,208
- Bookmarks:
- 1,106
- Hits:
- 67,383
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
24 Jun 2025
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they said love is reaching blindly at a pit full of snakes by summermidnights
Fandoms: One Piece
30 May 2022
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Summary
“What are you going to tell them?”“We’re friends with benefits,” Nami says with a straight face. Sanji chokes on his own spit and starts coughing violently. “Except the benefit is friendship.”
“So, friends. You’re literally just friends,” Usopp monotones flatly from his room.
Alternatively: During college, you learn that not everything is as it appears. Sanji is in love with Zoro, Zoro is dating Hiyori, and Nami accidentally ends up a master wingwoman by sorta kinda maybe platonically taking Sanji off the dating market.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 35,851
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 342
- Kudos:
- 4,031
- Bookmarks:
- 1,037
- Hits:
- 43,323
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
18 Jun 2025
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Summary
“You know none of this is true, right?” The shitty hunter soaks in the tacky decor of the coffee shop with visible distaste.“What?”
“Vamps don’t actually turn into bats,” he huffs, poking at a dangling plastic decoration. “And they sure as hell don’t wear capes, either. They look just like any average person. That’s what makes them so dangerous.”
“Oh. I had no idea,” lies Sanji, who is most definitely an average person and not a vampire. He shoots the mosshead his best customer service smile, the one that screams sir, this is just an innocent local business with no affiliation to vampires, the Easter Bunny, or Santa Claus. “Can I get you anything?”
Alternatively: In this economy, you gotta do what you gotta do. Some people hunt rogue vampires. Others run coffee shops that cater specifically to their fellow creatures of the night, and try their best not to get staked through the heart (or fall in love).
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 28,998
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 288
- Kudos:
- 3,039
- Bookmarks:
- 728
- Hits:
- 31,436
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
18 Jun 2025
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Summary
At five years old, Neil is sure he's going to marry his best friend Andrew one day.
At seventeen years old, he's still sure.
Series
- Part 1 of prophetic
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
11 Jun 2025
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Summary
“Exy isn’t the only team holding tryouts today.”
“So?” Neil sneered. What did he care? What did he care about anything anymore, when the only person who had attempted to save him from his life just dismissed him in two minutes flat? What was left?
“So,” the girl said, smiling and holding her hands behind her back, “Ever heard of the Vixens?”
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 13,493
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 90
- Kudos:
- 2,774
- Bookmarks:
- 499
- Hits:
- 18,356
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
11 Jun 2025
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Summary
Neil leaned forward, lowering his voice this time. "I think I'm homophobic."
"Yeah, buddy, I heard you. Me and the rest of campus." Matt was smiling at him like usual, but this time it was more reluctant. "Do you want to expand on that?"
"No."
--
After walking in on his roommate, Andrew Minyard, kissing a guy, Neil is convinced that he must be homophobic.
He doesn't even stop to consider that perhaps he is instead jealous, and also a massive idiot.
Series
- Part 1 of habit
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
08 Jun 2025
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Summary
There’s a tradition in Wano.
To ask for someone’s hand in marriage, you have to challenge them to a fight. If they accept, and you win, the proposal goes through and you’re engaged. If you lose, the proposal is rejected and you can challenge that person again.
Where Zoro accidentally proposes to Sanji and angst and confessions follow.
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
04 Jun 2025
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You'll whisper lies to me (and one of them will be true) by Veto_power_over_clocks
Fandoms: One Piece (Live Action TV 2023)
03 Nov 2023
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Summary
Sanji introduces Zoro to Two Truths and a Lie. He only ever plays with Zoro, and all his lies are shit.
(Alternatively: Sanji subjects himself to the mortifying ordeal of being known by Zoro. He does everything in his power to ensure Zoro doesn't realize that's what's happening.)
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
01 Jun 2025
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Summary
It’s not like Zoro actually wants to like the guy anyway. He’d be just as happy if the feelings faded and he wasn’t saddled with an embarrassing crush on a guy whose suit lines are straighter than his eyebrows.
Or, Sanji has to crash at Zoro's, Zoro and Sanji are pining like idiots, and Nami is an evil mastermind (no one can prove anything).
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
01 Jun 2025
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Summary
It bites hard.
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
01 Jun 2025
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Summary
It’s gotten to the point that when Zoro stretched his legs out into the extra space, the hand Sanji had left on his knee slid up to his thigh and rested there, both of them paying it no mind.
Okay, maybe that wasn’t entirely accurate. Sanji paid it no mind. Zoro proceeded to have an out-of-body experience to cope with the way Sanji’s thumb was making small circles just off the sports logo of Zoro’s sweatpants.
He probably didn’t even know he was doing it.
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
01 Jun 2025
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Summary
“Oh. What Zoro finds pretty? That’s obvious."
“It is?” Sanji asks, shocked.
“It is?” Zoro asks, eyes wide.
Or: six times Sanji tries to guess Zoro’s type, and one time Zoro asks for his.
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
31 May 2025
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Summary
It's too damn early to figure out the secret codes of grumpy angels....Dean's just trying to make breakfast, okay?
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
12 May 2025
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Summary
Zoro is a cambion, which means he feeds on sexual energy. A small crew like the Strawhats, its not normally enough to keep a cambion satisfied, but Sanji happens to be an abnormally sexually driven cook so it usually works out okay for Zoro. At least, it works out alright until Sanji finds out that Zoro's been taking energy from him through his dreams.
For Sanji, he's trying to wade through the confusing mess of emotions for a certain marimo after a surprise kiss on the battle feild. It's not easy to do on a normal basis. It certainly isn't any easier when the man he has deeper feelings for is a cambion.
Then everyone learns how important it is to keep their local cambion fed, for if they don't, someone might get eaten. literally.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 61,900
- Chapters:
- 24/24
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 452
- Kudos:
- 6,966
- Bookmarks:
- 1,162
- Hits:
- 117,744
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
04 May 2025
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Black Bramble by Kageyamas_Tiktok for ChodzacaParodia
Fandoms: One Piece (Anime & Manga)
06 Oct 2024
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Summary
When Zoro brings a thorn filled bush back to Thousand Sunny for the Cook, he does not expect things to go the way they do. For one, his plan of execution is faltered the moment he steps into the Shitty Cook’s domain, and honestly, everything kind of just crumbles from there.
The last thing Zoro expected was for Sanji to be so pleased and to find himself turning red and hot with nerves.
Or;
Zoro buys Sanji a gift. Things go a little sideways when Sanji appreciates the gag gift instead of realizing it’s a meant to be a jab, but that’s okay because Zoro has always taken the scenic route to his end destination.His end destination, however, doesn’t seem to be Sanji’s ire after all.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 19,651
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 122
- Kudos:
- 1,448
- Bookmarks:
- 324
- Hits:
- 12,659
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
30 Apr 2025
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Summary
Zoro and Sanji don’t say a word to one another for an entire week, and it isn’t by design. Sanji eventually notices and decides it’s high time they do something about it. Zoro is one hundred percent onboard, especially when he gets to see Sanji’s smile in the process.
Or;
Three times Zoro and Sanji unknowingly calm one another’s racing hearts with the rhythm of their breathing without a word, and one time they have a chat that leads to some heavy breathing that makes their heart rates spike.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,863
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 32
- Kudos:
- 536
- Bookmarks:
- 78
- Hits:
- 3,378
Bookmarked by icecreamcookiesketchupfruitplumraspberry
30 Apr 2025