lie_to_me
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Ed knows hypnosis isn’t real. So when Stede mentions that he knows how to hypnotize people, Ed does the only reasonable thing and dares his co-captain to hypnotize him.
This might, in retrospect, have been a tactical error.
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Ed is trying to give Stede a backrub and his brain is getting in the way. Stede has an idea for how to help. (It’s a vibrating buttplug.)
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Be warned: this is on indefinite hiatus until my brain cooperates with writing it again. I'm so sorry! I swore that this wouldn't happen, but here we are! If you happen to know who the boss of my brain is, please tell me so they can have a word with it.
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“That’s what I’m trying to say, you absolutely repugnant little man,” he snaps. “No one wants to see you leave!”
Izzy raises his eyebrows and scoffs. Pull the other one, you twat.
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In which Ed and Stede figure out how to be happy, and that means sorting shit out with Izzy. Through the power of kinky sex as therapy, obviously.
This is heading for a steddyhands happily ever after, but it's gonna be a bumpy ride.
Series
- Part 3 of we should just kiss like real people do
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Ed’s eyes go wide in a way that makes Stede’s blood sing, makes something in him howl mine mine mine, and he knows he should unhand Ed, this is no way to treat his friend, but his body seems to be operating somewhat outside of his conscious control at the moment.
“What -” Ed starts, but Stede narrows his eyes and snaps: “Hush!”
Ed’s eyes grow even wider, and Stede has absolutely no idea what he’s doing, but Ed’s mouth has dropped open and he’s looking at Stede with pupils blown open and Stede knows he must still be wet and loose under the leathers and it’s all just too fucking much.
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“Why the fuck are you here,” Blackbeard growls, bored and dangerous, slanting a glare at Stede.
Stede’s face does a funny little wobble, but he takes a breath and rights himself. “Well. I came to apologize, for leaving you. Not showing up, that night. I should never…” he trails off, clears his throat. “It was badly done of me. It didn’t take me long to figure out what an idiot I’d been, but…it also took me far too long.”
He pauses, takes a step towards (Edward) Blackbeard. “I love you, and I should never have left.”
Edward (Blackbeard) reels.
A gut wound would have been kinder. He is buffeted by a maelstrom of emotions: hurt and anger and hope and more that he can’t name. He digs his fingers hard into the empty shelf in front of him, stripped of its books and knickknacks and frippery because Stede was gone and Edward hadn’t been able to hold it together for one more minute on a ship so full of his presence.
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or: Another post-s1 fixit, featuring desperately fucked up pirates who don't know how to be happy yet, but are going to have a lot of angsty sex about it.
Series
- Part 2 of we should just kiss like real people do
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Jesse's new place is great. He doesn't pay rent or utilities, and he often gets his groceries comped by generous admirers along with many other expensive gifts. It's really the ideal situation. He's living his best life, all day, every day. It's great. It's great. It's great.
Bookmarked by lie_to_me
03 Apr 2024
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The meet-cute fast-burn no-angst one-shot no one asked for. Divorced dad Stede Bonnet is having a very bad day when he meets a handsome train conductor who helps him out of a jam. Will they choo-choo-choose each other? (Spoiler alert: yes).
Bookmarked by lie_to_me
08 Feb 2024
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Ed picks Stede up at a bar for what ought to be a one-night stand, but it turns out they're attending the same academic conference the next day.
“Yes, please, a – Loose Cannon, did you say? Really, how charmingly nautical.” There. Words. Sub-optimal words, but words nonetheless. He grins, aiming it toward the stranger while taking him in in smaller doses. Leather boots, faded, artfully ripped black jeans, a purple cropped shirt under a silky, billowy black – kimono? Overshirt? Facial scruff. Lots of hair, salt and pepper, pepper only just winning out, for now. Tattooed knuckles, forearms, collarbone. Earring, silver stacking rings on most fingers, a nose stud that somehow softens the whole, well, lewk and – okay, he’s staring. He stares some more as the man reaches to accept his own drink, revealing more tattoos up the arm and an inch more of skin below the crop top. The stranger makes some obscure gesture to the bartender, then meets Stede’s eyes, which he worries might actually be protruding from his skull, like a cartoon. AwOOga.
Series
- Part 1 of Pirates of the Care-i-Bae'n
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- English
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Bookmarked by lie_to_me
27 Nov 2023
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It takes a few tries for Ed to get what he wants.
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Bookmarked by lie_to_me
23 Mar 2023
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"Wait," Stede blurts.
It comes out somewhat strangled, but honestly, he can't be blamed for that. This conversation has taken several unexpected turns in the last few minutes, and he's feeling more than a bit blindsided.
"You're married? And you're just telling me now?"
Bookmarked by lie_to_me
02 Mar 2023