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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    4 times Shane was strict with Ilya and the 1 time he wasn't ft Ilya having an emotional crisis over it.

     

    inspired by the tweet: ilya actually love having a strict boyfriend. like no his bitch do not let him have friends NO he not allowed to be out past 11 and NO U CANNOT SIT HERE!!!

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,432
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    419
    Kudos:
    18,349
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    03 Feb 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    After this, it seems like the notes won’t stop coming. Without fail, at least once a day, he gets a reminder that someone is thinking of him.

    Sometimes they appear first thing in the morning when he gets into work, accompanied by a pastry or a coffee. More often than not, they appear after lunch with a ginger ale or a banana. Every time though, they’re accompanied by some ridiculous and overtly flirtatious lines.

    You look stunning today

    Your smile takes my breath away

    This sweater looks so good on you

    or - shane hollander has a secret admirer

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,772
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    26
    Kudos:
    692
    Bookmarks:
    152
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    4,472

    03 Feb 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    It’s not going viral because Jane’s true identity was exposed—or even because Ilya was blatantly sexting in public. That part’s as expected as Shane doing yoga or any human being on earth breathing.

    No, the texts are going viral because no one can believe how bad this “Jane” is at sexting.

    The women of the world are outraged. The men of the world are baffled. No one can understand why Ilya Rozanov, whose abs have their own fan club, is wasting his time on ‘a piece of cardboard that wished to be turned into a real girl’ (this particular joke has 300k likes and counting).

    Or: After a social media trend mocks Shane's sexting skills, he tries to improve them. It goes about as poorly as you'd expect.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,196
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    581
    Kudos:
    12,942
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    2,754
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    54,823

    03 Feb 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    "My point is that Rozanov, like, talks Shane down before he even realizes he’s panicking. He makes him snacks with fucking buckwheat in them and he even gets Shane to take a day off once in a blue moon. He’s an asshole,” Hayden says. “He’s obnoxious and rude and frankly, unpleasant. I’m not saying he’s a good guy. But he is a good husband.”

    Or: 5 times Hayden defends Ilya behind his back, +1 time he defends Ilya in front of him

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,315
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    238
    Kudos:
    7,679
    Bookmarks:
    1,273
    Hits:
    30,361

    03 Feb 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    "Ilya, I'm not—we can't—I'm not pregnant."

    Ilya grins. “Not yet.”

    All Shane wanted was a nice, romantic weekend. A little yoga, a little relaxation, quality time with his husband. What he got was three days of prenatal classes, a room full of pregnant women, and Ilya treating the whole thing like his personal comedy special.

    They were the only couple without a baby bump. Ilya decided this was a minor detail. By the final day, he was more invested in their "pregnancy" than half the actual parents in the room.

    Or;

    Shane books the wrong yoga class. Ilya makes it everyone's problem.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,302
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    72
    Kudos:
    1,442
    Bookmarks:
    253
    Hits:
    11,073

    01 Feb 2026