wizardwiles
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Recent works
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most people are jokes but you’re so real by wizardwiles
Fandoms: Stardew Valley (Video Game)
13 Oct 2025
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Summary
The accretion of bodies pulsated frenetically as the song reached a screeching climax. Someone bumped into Sebastian; he stumbled into Sam and frantically grasped at Sam to regain his footing. Sam grabbed his wrists and stabilized him, his gaze unwavering. Sebastian threw himself at Sam, wrapping his arms around his friend’s shoulders in a clumsy embrace. He pressed his face to Sam’s neck, the sweat-slick skin sticking to his cheek. Sam’s hands fisted in the thick cotton of his friend’s shirt, his nails raking against the fibers. They were adrift in the sea of bodies, clinging to one another in the surging waves of movement.
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Sam and Sebastian grow up together over the course of ten years riddled with teen angst and juvenillity.
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Pizzapants clasped the mug tightly in his paws, nails clinking against the side. The warmth emanated out from inside the ceramic, seeping into his paws. He raised it slowly off the floor, careful not to spill it. He had filled it with water until it nearly spilled over, another fossilized idiosyncrasy from someone he would not see again. His paws sizzled with heat. He felt feverish.
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Summary
Asriel Dreemurr is the pilot of Unit 01 and is the son of esteemed Commander Dreemurr, head of NERV. Pizzapants is the pilot of Unit 02, and he loathes Asriel Dreemurr. Despite their fraught relationship, they do have a mutual understanding of one thing: being an eva pilot fucking sucks.
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Summary
You are in love with Asriel Dreemur.
He’s the angel of the school and the bane of your existence – an infinitely kind, intelligent, and generous individual serving as a constant reminder of your own (numerous) inadequacies. For years, acrid envy twisted into a dense knot in the center of your being. He made you sick. He made you feel pathetic. He was Asriel Dreemur, and you were just Pizzapants. But that tight tangle of hatred in your stomach uncoiled with time, leaving you with a simmering resentment and vague sense of admiration.---
A choose-your-own-adventure story where you play as pining loser Pizzapants, complete with 12 unique endings. You can make Asriel Dreamer your friend, lover, or worst enemy; Pizzapants’ fate is in your hands.
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Summary
Oikawa's chest rose and fell rapidly as he struggled to draw breath. He raised his hand to Iwaizumi’s face, fingertips grazing his hairline and his palm ghosting his cheek.
“Iwa-chan,” Oikawa muttered, voice pitchy. “I, um… nevermind.”
“Yeah?”
“Nothing. It’s nothing.”
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Oikawa wants to get drunk and have a good time. Iwaizumi wants to make sure he doesn't act like an idiot. There's tension of the sexual and non-sexual variety.
Recent series
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dreaming of days of a different life by wizardwiles
Fandom: Dream SMP, Minecraft (Video Game)
25 Apr 2021
Summary
Also known as "The Official Dream Team Cowboy AU."
George is small town sheriff trying to stay out of trouble, and Dream is a good-for-nothing gunslinger looking to start trouble.
They get along tremendously well.
2023 EDIT: I don't watch / support the dream team anymore. I'm keeping these fics up because they're like historical relics to me lol.
- Words:
- 55,652
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 275
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Greyscales by wizardwiles
Fandom: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
02 Nov 2019
Summary
The woeful chronicles of Tsumugi Shirogane, Kaede Akamatsu, and their importunate love through passion and death.
- Words:
- 10,161
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 2