Chapter Text
12:16pm.
He was late.
As expected.
You heave a desolate sigh but smile to yourself weakly as you picture the thought of him all flustered and in a rush to reach the meet-up point. He would be mentally setting himself a challenge, most likely to enjoy the thrill of breaking his former record. And when he would finally appear within your sights, a smile plastered across his lips in victory, he would usher words of apology and slowly fade into an explanation to which you would interrupt and say it's fine. That you hadn't in fact been waiting for almost an hour in a panicked state that he would be a no show - worded more carefully of course to avoid discussion.
The crinkle of the tickets in your hands brought you to your senses, the smile disappearing beneath a cloud of uncertainty.
You've been waiting to attend this cultural exhibition for weeks now and it took you almost a decade to gather up the courage to even ask if he would like to join you. It had always been him doing the inviting - whenever the opportunity emerged.
Small vibrations from the your pocket almost made you start as you pull out your phone to see a familiar name etched across your screen. A name that made you smile once too often.
"Bonjour ma chère amie."
You have to bite your lip to stop yourself from smiling like a fool as the apples of your cheeks rise, the warm fluttering feeling of being wrapped up in a soft blanket overtaking your senses.
"Hello Namjoon. French today, is it?"
You hear a soft chuckle respond from the other end.
"I thought it was rather fitting, considering today's events."
"Your accent adds a nice touch to it." You smile, knowing he was too. "Have I mentioned just how much I love that you greet me in a different language every day? Imagine you run out."
"Impossible. There is an endless number of possibilities for new languages all over the world. I just have to dig a little deeper."
"You're crazy, but adorable."
You watch as a flock of birds scour the skies in one graceful sweep, forming the perfect V shape like creating art on a blue canvas. The sunshine warmed your face, sending little chills down your body.
"You and Jungkook on your way yet?" Namjoon's voice breaks you out of your reverie.
You dip your chin, clutching the tickets a little harder. "No, not yet. He's uh... he's running a little late."
There was a moment's silence, almost as though he had cut the line on you. You frown.
"Namjoon?"
There seemed to be sounds of movement, like Namjoon was shifting uncomfortably before he laughed half-heartedly.
"Ah- sorry, I mean, that's just like him isn't it?"
So he had noticed too, and somehow that seemed to sting more than it should have. But, you could sense the unease coming off from Namjoon just by the sound of his voice. You had known each other since your fetus days, grew up in the same neighbourhood, attended the same schools until university - when you took slightly different paths and focused on separate majors. It was your little trio - Jungkook, Namjoon and yourself. The boys focusing on music - Jungkook sideline taking up photography - and yourself on creative writing.
Writing was an art. A blank canvas that allowed the artist to shape, create and paint a picture with words using the images from their mind. It always felt so relaxing, an escape if you will. You were a sucker for books packed with feeling.
"It's okay, I know his schedule must be a little hectic so he must have gotten caught up in something. He'll be here soon," you reassure Namjoon, almost half not believing your own words.
"Remind me to set alarms on that guy's phone next time we meet."
You laugh out loud, a gratifying feeling of encouragement spreading throughout your body.
"I'll do that." Your eyes flicker up, catching movement from the near distance and the familiar black ball cap peeks within your vision. Your heart automatically swells with delight. "Namjoon, I think he's here. I'll talk to you soon?"
"Sure. Enjoy the exhibition. Tell me how it goes."
"I will, thanks grapemon."
You hear him chuckle at the aged nickname before cutting the line.
Looking up, you catch sight of Jungkook speed walking through the mildly busy path leading towards the train station. You automatically notice the intense amount of black he was clad in from head to toe. The ripped jeans, clinging to each and every crevice making his thighs seem thicker than ever. The plain black tee that he filled out almost too perfectly - broad and firm. He wore his favourite leather jacket, unzipped at the front.
Jeon Jungkook made your heart skip in a way that no one else could. A forest of a thousand butterflies swimming within your stomach, chills crawling up your spine like you had stepped into the arctic sea, your breath hitching when he makes the briefest eye contact. It was almost like death in itself.
Seeing his rather flustered face, lit up with excitement was enough to wash away all the clouded judgements and doubts in your mind, the fog around your heart fading away with ease. It was almost ridiculous just how easily Jungkook could affect your mood.
"Sorry sorry sorry!" he calls out as he reaches hearing distance, a smile plastered across his mouth, the little mole beneath his bottom lip so eminent and only growing more noticeable as he drew closer. You could almost feel the heat coming off from his body. "(Y/N) I'm so sorry, but you wouldn't believe who called, can you guess?"
He huffs to catch a breath before looking relaxed, lifting the bill of his cap up to look down at you with those bright warming eyes that were glinting in the sunlight from enthusiasm. His every feature on his face seemed uplifted, bubbling with sheer anticipation. Whatever he had just experienced this morning seemed to really have him fit to burst.
You suddenly find yourself swallowing hard and forcing a smile.
"It's fine, honestly. I wasn't waiting long." You're lying through your teeth. "Are you really going to make me guess? You know how bad I am at that."
Jungkook flashed a smile that revealed the set of white teeth, so much resembling an actual bunny that even you couldn't attempt at forcing a smile if you tried. It came naturally, and this was Jungkook's charm.
His cheeks were elevated, the scar on his left cheek jutting out like an odd puzzle piece but it fit with Jungkook's face perfectly. The little flaws that made him, him. He looked so genuinely happy right now that you almost wanted to cry.
"The Limewire company I mentioned before? The one I sent my samples to?"
You could already tell where this was going, your heart pounding fast as you stare at him in awe.
"No way, did they call you back?!"
He claps his hands together in delight, smiling widely. "One of the listed members of the board took interest in my pieces - said he would very much like to see more of my work and invited me to discuss my application and future options."
"Jungkook that's great!" You truly are cherishing this joyous moment because you knew just how much photography meant to Jungkook. Ever since he applied for an internship with one of the leading companies that specialised in delivering scenery shots for magazines and the like, it was all Jungkook could talk about. Just seeing how his face lifted up, radiant and illuminating, it was enough for you. His happiness meant everything. This was a moment that he chose to share especially with you first and foremost and that had your blood racing.
Without warning, he moved forward abruptly and pulled you into a tight embrace. The action caused you to stumble, gasping as his strength enclosed you within its shelter. Your face fell against his broad chest, the soft t-shirt pressing into your skin smelling freshly washed and very much like Jungkook. His arms wrapped around you like a warm protective barrier, waves of electricity sinking through the layers of your clothes and cutting through the pelt of your skin, deeply.
He tightens his hold, capturing your every breath you were struggling to take as your body moulds in with his perfectly like two pieces of a jigsaw. You press your face in further, inhaling long and hard as you put your arms around him in return, truly feeling the difference in your heights. His breath felt moist and hot against your bare neck, nose brushing the soft hairs at your skin and sending shivers throughout your body.
This was what it meant, to be in love with Jeon Jungkook.
He draws back, but doesn't break skin contact as his hands slide down from your arms slowly, agonisingly, lowering down until they rest gently on your hands as he cups them within his own and gives them a squeeze. You force yourself to look up, cheeks burning and mind reeling from what just happened. You hated how it didn't seem to affect him at all.
"(Y/N) this is such a brilliant opportunity, my dreams are slowly coming true and I couldn't be happier." His smile dug deep into your heart, worming its way into your soul. His eyes held yours hostage, refusing to release you from his grasp. "I couldn't have done this without yours and Namjoon hyung's support. I'm so thankful, honestly."
He squeezed your hands tighter, still continuing to steal your every breath, your sanity with just his burning gaze. Your eyes trail to his lips, pink and supple and his skin with its warm tones, made you want to cup his face and pull him close. You smile back, cheekbones high and a small laugh escapes your lips as you attempt to calm yourself and your erratic heartbeat.
"Don't be silly. We're your friends - we're always going to support you no matter what. And this is your talent and hard work that is paying off, I knew you could do it Jungkook," you respond wholeheartedly.
He sighs wistfully, almost satisfied. His hands, you are aware, were still holding yours. Veins vibrant across the backs of his hands and the silver rings adorning his fingers... you wondered what it would be like to entwine your fingers together.
The intense friction of his touch unearthed hidden feelings of desire deep within you that you had to force yourself to draw your hands away. He didn't seem bothered.
"Now tell me, when will you be seeing them to grace their lives with more of your beautiful photography?"
When he fiddled with the bill of his cap and scratched the corner of his eye, you immediately notice the change in his demeanour. His eyes break contact and he suddenly looks a little awkward. Your breathing hitches, your heartbeat almost coming to a standstill as the icy chills of discomfort trails across your skin.
"Actually..." he chuckles, licking at his lips. "He asked to see me today, with my portfolio."
Your hand clutching the tickets suddenly crushed them tight against your palm until you could feel the cries of torture echoing from the crinkled pieces of paper. You force yourself to keep an expressionless face that hopefully showed no signs of disappointment or dejection.
He catches your eye, watching you like a hawk for an inkling as to what you were feeling. He wouldn't be able to guess even if he tried, and for that sometimes you resented just how naive Jungkook could be when it came to feelings.
"Oh..." you finally blurt out. Your eyes shift awkwardly, not knowing where to look as your heart tightens within your chest. A lump beginning to form in your throat. "So, rain check on the exhibition?"
He looked bashful, if not a little hopeful as he sighed. "I'm really sorry. I just didn't expect something so big to come up and you know I would do anything for you but-"
"No, no," you say quickly. Your heart in real time was racing, your lungs on the verge of collapse. "It's okay. I couldn't possibly make you choose me over your life's dream." You reassure him, hating the way you could barely convince yourself that it was all right, that you weren't in fact devastated by the idea that this was just another rejection to add to the book.
He smiled weakly, the corners of his eyes lightly crinkling. "I mean, I thought we could maybe go for a coffee or something instead so we could still hang out? That's the purpose of this meet up, isn't it?"
And then everything came tumbling down like a cascade of broken walls and shattered windows of a glass building that had just collapsed. The weight of the world, all doubt and judgement crashing down on your shoulders, crushing your heart into nothingness.
The sting in the backs of your eyes was your first warning bell. The stout lump in your throat the second. The heavy feeling in your chest stopping your every breath was the third.
Hang out...
The words were like poison, echoing in the craters of your mind like a bad mix-tape on replay. The feeling was almost too excruciating to describe as you look down quickly to avoid him catching the tears that were slowly forming on the brinks of your waterlines.
Right..." you mumble. "Hang out." The word felt like grime on the tip of your tongue that made you want to spit it out. You force yourself to glance up when he speaks.
"What's wrong? You seem mad."
"I'm not mad."
He tilts his head gently at an angle, as if he were analysing you like one of his photography samples. But there was a playful glint in his eyes - he wasn't being at all serious. Your heart sinks.
"Come on. You can te-"
"Jungkook please," you cut him off sharply, hating the uneven broken tone in your voice. "I just want to go home."
He looked like you had just slapped him across the face and it couldn't make you feel any worse. All smiles and playfulness gone, in place was just surprise and a little agitation. He clearly knew he had said something wrong, words that cut clean through your heart and extinguished any feelings of adoration you had left for him. He stepped forward, a confused expression on his face and it only bothered you more.
"You're upset. (Y/N), I'm-"
"I don't want to talk about this now Jungkook."
"But-"
You look up a little fiercely, throwing him off guard and stopping him in his tracks. You crush the tickets in your hand, pouring all your feelings of devastation and hurt into compressing the paper into a tight ball. You drop them, before turning away.
"Good luck with the meeting. I hope it goes well," you force the words out as you begin to take steps away back towards the way you came.
"(Y/N) wait!"
But you couldn't.
Your heart splintered into a thousand pieces, like a crushing defeat after a long torturous war. The aching throb inside your chest was a feeling all too familiar, like fists crushing your lungs and claws sinking around your windpipe stopping you from breathing.
It hurt. It hurt so much.
As the tears slowly dampened the area around your eyes, you think about the way Jungkook's voice sounded so torn as he called your name from behind. But he would not chase. Jungkook does not chase. Not you.
How could you possibly talk to him, when he clearly had no idea? When he was completely oblivious to your feelings, your fondness and how the world may revolve around Jungkook, but he was your world? How could you possibly explain how you were in fact feeling like he was leaving you behind, how you waited almost an hour today setting your anxiety on fire, the thought that he would call or drop a message to say he wanted to cancel? You didn't want to just hang out like two casual friends - this outing meant everything. It was part of your passion and you wanted to share it with the person you admired most in the world. Did he realise just how much his words hurt you? One word from him could silence you forever.
You and Jungkook shared this unwritten unlabelled relationship, tip toeing around the spark that you both shared and knowing just what you meant to one another. But on this particular chess board, you were the piece to act as the sacrifice, the queen who would take on an oncoming storm, every attack, every hurdle that stepped in the path of your king's victory. You would clear the path for him only to bear the brunt of the final blow, giving up everything for the one you held most dear.
It was the most toxic and unhealthy relationship.
But you would bear it.
Because this is what it meant, to be in love with Jeon Jungkook.
Coffee was great.
Your second best friend next to Namjoon and Jungkook. You shake your mind free of any thought about the latter name, erasing any brooding thoughts you were left to wallow in.
You hadn't gone home, in fact you somehow found yourself at the local library and sat yourself at the small canteen they had set up. It had been a few hours since your 'argument' with Jungkook and you needed some peace of mind - some time away from everything related to the matters of the heart.
It sunk in that perhaps you were a little dramatic in your exit. Afterall, Jungkook was only sharing his excitement about achieving one of his life goals and he seemed to be ecstatic to share that moment with you. Could you really blame him for having to cancel?
Don't be ridiculous, that's not what is really bothering you, you can hear you telling yourself.
You sigh incoherently, taking another long sip of your coffee, allowing the dark bitter taste of the liquidated coffee bean to swirl around your mouth as you savour the taste. It dulled your senses in the way you believed alcohol would - only you were 110 percent sober.
Jungkook tried to call you several times and had left two messages saying you both would 'need to talk later' but for now he would have to concentrate on earning that internship. You let it slide, gave in and messaged an 'OK' just to escape further conflict. The idea of losing Jungkook was perhaps the single most terrifying thought in the history of existence.
You placed your cup down and rub at your temples to ease the pent up strain that had gathered from the past hour. The buzzing of your phone snatches your attention.
Grapemon.
You almost instantly pick up, the phone practically slipping out from your fingers in a rush.
"Hey, sorry to interrupt what could be the greatest outing of your life but this is quite the emergency. I wouldn't ask if it wasn't life or death - and it is life or death, all right I'm rambling but how much baking powder am I meant to add t-"
"Plain or self-raising?"
"Why is that relevant?"
"Namjoon."
"Self-raising. No wait, plain. Hang on let me ch- shit!"
There was a clutter of utensils hitting the ground coming from the other end. The corner of your lips turn up at the mental image of Namjoon in the kitchen.
"OK, definitely self-raising. It's flour. It's all the same. Powdered white stuff that flies all up your nasal sinuses."
"You don't need baking powder if you're using self-raising. Save yourself the extra trouble."
"All right, all right. I'll take your word for it." He seems to be sorting out the clutter but it didn't stop him talking. You hold yourself back from spilling out every little detail from today's disaster 'date'. Not that it was even a date to begin with - Jungkook made it quite clear.
"So how's the exhibition? Meet your standards? Are you satisfied?"
You find yourself looking down into the contents of your coffee cup, watching the ring of milky froth around the edges settle into the ceramic later causing a stain. Your hand reaches out to turn the cup to the side, to fidget with something as a way to cope with the cluster of emotions trapped inside you.
"(Y/N)?"
You take a deep breath, releasing the cup to tap your fingers on the table as you sink into the comfort of your chair.
"I wouldn't know."
A clang sounded from Namjoon's side and you could tell he stopped in his baking to give you his full attention. You never hid anything from Namjoon, he was the yin to your yang, the cream to your coffee, the Yoongi to your Hoseok. Just... a great pair. How different your life would've been had you never known Kim Namjoon. The thought was much too depressing to think about.
"What do you mean? Is Jungkook with you?"
"He's rather... occupied, right now."
There was a short pause. "You sound disappointed."
Your fingers stop tapping the surface of the table. Sometimes, you hated just how well Namjoon was able to read you, to pick up on the little drops of your discomfort whenever you spoke. He voices the forbidden innermost thoughts that clouded your mind in a sheet of dark miasma.
You rub the skin at your neck, forcing the lump in your throat to go down. There was no way around this without being point blank honest.
"We had a little... dispute."
"Dispute? Did something happen?"
You shake your head, realising he couldn't actually see you but still did it anyway. "It's what didn't happen - he had to go. He heard back from that photography internship and they wanted to see him today."
"That's brilliant - the news, I mean, not the fact that he had to take a rain check."
You bite your bottom lip, now pulling at the loose threads on your ripped jeans. You could feel the frown lines on the bridge of your nose as the heavy constricting feeling returned inside your chest.
"Yeah."
"(Y/N). Something else happened, didn't it?"
Namjoon didn't miss a beat. You gather up your words, lining them up and feeling the dreading cloud of dejection swallow you whole. And with a slow and steady breath, you tell him. Everything. From the way Jungkook had simply seen your outing as a measly attempt to just spend time in each other's company like you would do on a regular school day, to how his words cut you deep until you felt as though if you swallowed a mouthful of glass shards then it would have hurt less.
How everything slowly piled up, time after time, your efforts continously going in vain and Jungkook yet to even open up to you about his feelings. If there were any to begin with. It felt like all you were doing was giving... and there was no getting. Only pain. Long torturous nights wondering if you could ever have a future with Jungkook, if you could even match yourself up against him. The golden student who excelled in all areas without so much as trying. He was naturally gifted - perfect. Too perfect.
But this traitorous heart of yours longed, pined and ached for him in a way that you had never felt before. Like you needed him to breathe, to see clearly and push yourself to work hard in everything that you do.
It had been three years. These feelings consumed you for three, long, tragic years and it was slowly becoming evident that perhaps... there was nothing to hope for. That this one sided love would meet its maker and you would go your separate ways. A fragmented friendship would be all that remained in your paths.
"Tell me where you are."
"Namjoon no," you say quickly, heart racing at the thought of seeing him face to face after confessing your long-awaited feelings of despair. "You have your cousin's birthday to prepare for and I-"
"Tell me where you are."
He repeated the words, much more sternly this time and you knew from the low decibels in his tone that he was being 100 percent serious and in no mood to play games. You sigh in defeat.
"Jeongdong Library."
"Give me fifteen minutes."
"I already had two coffees."
"Two coffees without me, so this will be your first one with me for the day."
You raise a taut eyebrow. "You intend on drugging me with caffeine?"
He shook his head, smirking with a dubious look scrawled over his face. "You talk as though three cups of coffee would somewhat affect you. I've known you far too long and know when to call on your bullshit."
You both share a hearty laugh but you knew what was to follow after your mild exchange of brief smiles and cheer. Namjoon did not look pleased when he entered the canteen and found you drowning in your own self pity at the table. The library was nearing close, with the canteen almost empty save two or three solo students caught up in a last minute rush to finish their assignments.
The sun was slowly beginning to set, blue skies fading to a warm gradient of orange and pink hues as the temperature cooled. It had been pretty warm out today - perfect to spend the day with your friend or loved one. You bite back from thinking about the look on Jungkook's face when you told him you wanted to go home. The guilt was thick, sharp and encased your hurt into a glass box to allow the consequences of your actions to fully sink in.
You watch as Namjoon stirs his freshly made frothy cappuccino with a small spoon before seeming content and lifting the cup to his lips to take a sip.
"Ah, that's real good. I should try decaf though - apparent requests from my growing fanbase."
"Where is the fun in drinking coffee if you take the caffeine out of it?" You remark teasingly, sipping your own coffee as you catch Namjoon's eye over the rip of your cup. He seemed to be a little flustered, no doubt struggling with the baking. The kitchen was not an area suited for the infamous Rap Monster. You smile at the stage name he had given himself - though very fitting you couldn't but help deem him as grapemon forever after once dyeing his hair a lush purple. An experiment that went down well and birthed the affectionate nickname you now had for him.
His hair was a natural shade of brown, the ends highlighted from the suns rays but looked fluffier than ever but neatly presented. His undercut protruding, with his bangs falling across the left side of his face. Namjoon was tall. He towered over both you and JK but he was a soft as they came. He was there whenever you needed him. Always.
"They call me King you know," he utters. "King Namjoon."
"I'll be damned. Do they call you King of baking too?"
"Hilarious."
"I am, aren't I?" You smirk, noticing the roll of his eyes but even he couldn't stop himself from smiling brightly.
There it was. The flash of his dimples - the left more prominent than the right. A perfect dip contrasting nicely with his tanned skin that made you long to brush your fingers across it. There was just something about the way his skin seemed to glow even in the shade, the melanin so luminous, accentuating each and every pore to perfection.
It dawns on you that you've been staring at Kim Namjoon much too long, and in a manner deemed far greater than just a candid friendship.
It was the danger zone. Your heart palpitating to an extreme degree, the feeling much too alien and had you feeling uncomfortable. You tear your eyes away, clearing your throat and vapidly erasing all lucid thoughts from your head.
Not Namjoon. You could never think of Namjoon in that way.
"So, Jeon-"
You let out a groan, bringing your head down and burying your face in your right hand.
"We've gone over this. I'm okay, I told you." But you weren't sure whether you were trying to convince Namjoon, or yourself.
"I have an IQ of 148."
"Clearly not in baking..." you mumble into your hand.
"What was that?"
"I said it's hot, I'm baking."
Namjoon pressed his lips into a thin line, sucking them in before heaving a deep sigh. He looked tired if anything, lost in a space of thought where he had multiple life events shifting back and forth and he was struggling to keep out. You instantly regret telling Namjoon anything at this point.
You sit up, face void of emotion as you draw your coffee cup into your hands.
"Let's be honest Namjoon, Jungkook was never the type to have a storybook romance, achieve his dreams and live happily ever after with the love of his life. He's focused, hardworking and ambitious. Incredibly. He will strive to achieve new skills, work on one thing, complete it then move on. He is rising up in the world." You have to catch your breath before continuing, knowing full well Namjoon was watching you. "And look at where I am..."
"Yes, look at where you are." Namjoon's serious tone makes you look up in surprise. There was a dark look glazed over his eyes as he stares at you with a burning gaze, the intensity almost catastrophic that you have to hold your breath. "You passed school, your exams with flying colours. Despite your parents wishes, you fought for your passion and worked hard to get into the university you wanted for your major. Your mind is like a limbo filled with the utmost beauty, a world of imagination, a mix of words and colours like a pretty painted picture. Can one ever truly disclose an explanation of how the mind works? Can you truly capture the beauty of ones thoughts?"
You sit, absolutely still. Speechless. Mesmerised by his words that seemed to sing to every cell in your body. Your eyes have not broken contact, his brown eyes still strong, still tearing a hole through you. Your blood races, the tight hold over your heart achingly clenches harder.
"You can, (Y/N)."
Pure. Still. Silence.
No more words are exchanged as you sit gaping, processing every word, every meaning behind his words of art that held such ambience - Namjoon had the power to shake the world with just his voice and his beautiful mind. Your heart, you could feel, had not stopped racing. Your throat all clammy, the words trapped, caged within in a broken mess.
Something damp trickled down the length of your cheek. You blink, caught up in the moment as you see Namjoon's face pale slightly, eyes drawn to the trail of a glistening tear making its way down your right cheek.
The world around you had stopped, enclosing you both within a safe space, your own limbo where only colours were splattered across the skies, the aura uplifting and peaceful - it's own zen.
And it was only you. And it was only Namjoon.
His hand reaches across the gap between you both, a space laced heavily with a building tension, heated and intoxicating. You hold your breath, afraid to even let an ounce of air escape your lips as your eyes are glued to his outstretched fingers that curl around your cheek.
The warmth is instant, the touch so static you felt it shoot right down to your core. His skin, smooth and slightly soft but firm, yearning to draw closer to your skin, pressed deep. His thumb then slowly swipes across just below your eye, erasing away any evidence of tears, smoothing over the damp skin.
You gasp quietly, eyes back on Namjoon who is just as lost in this moment as you are.
Nothing felt safer, than Namjoon's touch. It felt like a barrier being placed around you - one filled with meaningful friendship, a raw honest kind of love that had built up over the years and something... else.
Something that had clearly been lingering in the shadows of your friendship but you daren't tread upon. It frightened you more than anything because when the thought flashed in your mind... it never felt wrong.
When it should.
Almost like he could read your thoughts, Namjoon broke skin contact and coughed. His hand instantly drew back and the signs of a light flush gracing his cheeks. His eyes shifted nervously, as if to find something that would help to ease the thrumming sounds of your hearts beating in the atmosphere.
Dear God, help me.
"D-Don't cry," he finally blurted out.
It did nothing to palliate the heavy medium you both were currently sinking in. He leans back into his seat, taking hold of his cup but not before staring at the hand that had just brushed against your skin, almost a little longingly. Regretfully. He coughs again before smiling quickly, dimples flashing with a bashful look on his face.
"Really, don't." He dips his chin, almost willing you to come out from your daze. You could still feel his burning touch on his skin, a mark imprinted there forever. Your pulse thundered, your heart set to leap out from your chest.
What was happening?
"I can't bear to see you cry, it makes me want to cry too. And no one wants to see me cry."
You swallow hard. Once. Twice. "I've never seen you cry."
Even your voice was shaking. Was this the true effect Namjoon had on people? Or just you?
"Yes you have. When we were kids, at least." He chuckles and the sound eases your pent up tense muscles and you breathe a little deeper. "Just know something (Y/N). That everything I said... is true to the last word."
With that, you lock eyes once more. You're lost in an ocean of deep meaning, of questionable feelings and understanding. An ocean only a true King could navigate through... with his Queen in tow.
And you knew, everything would be okay.