Work Text:
“Nursey,” Dex groaned where they stood, still interlocked behind the student center, fingers tangled in hair, shirts raked up, lips bruised from kissing. It was usually a quiet spot this time of night, but still completely open to anyone passing by, and Dex didn’t want to chance it. They had to hit pause on this thing, now.
“Jesus fuck, Nursey, stop.” Dex grabbed Nursey’s wrist to still his hand when nimble fingers started to work Dex’s cock through his jeans.
“Then get your hand off my ass.”
“We can’t do this in public,” Dex reasoned, what little brainpower he had left hanging on to his sense of decency by a frayed thread.
“I know,” Nursey said, even as he continued to kiss up and down Dex’s throat.
“Well then stop.”
“I can’t.”
“I know it’s difficult,” Dex said, fighting his own urge to spin them around and push Nursey up against the wall. “But just hold off for a minute.”
“Promise me you’ll still be here,” Nursey said, arms coming up to wrap tight around Dex’s back.
“What?”
“Promise me you’ll still be here if I stop,” he repeated, face hidden in the crook of Dex’s neck. “If I let you go.”
“Yeah, Nursey,” Dex said, his lust suddenly tempered by the vulnerable sound of Nursey’s voice. “I’ll still be here. I’m not going anywhere.”
He waited for Nursey to make the first move, unsure of how to proceed but certain Nursey needed this, needed a chance to cool off and slow down. To assure himself that Dex was going to stay right here with him, was here for all of it. He seemed to be carrying more baggage than even his previous confessions had let on, and in the long run Dex favored stability over the rush of a passionate moment.
As Nursey loosened his grip on his shirt and cautiously moved away, Dex made sure to keep a steady hand on him, a weight that managed to ground them both with its reassurance.
“I’m not going to apologize again,” Nursey murmured to himself. He looked up into Dex’s eyes, dragging in a long, fortifying breath before speaking again.
“I didn’t mean for this to… devolve like that.”
“It’s okay,” Dex answered, lightly squeezing Nursey’s arm. He didn’t know if it was the right thing to say, but he meant it nonetheless.
Nursey smiled. “You’re getting soft, bro,” he chirped, voice fond.
“Too much pie will do that to you,” Dex replied with a grin.
“Oh don’t even,” Nursey protested, rolling his eyes in exasperation. “Your body is fucking perfect.” Dex opened his mouth to protest, but Nursey cut him off at the pass. “Argue with me and I’ll have to touch you again, show you every single perfect thing about you.”
“Nobody’s fucking perfect, Nurse,” Dex said, irritated at both Nursey’s hypocritical words and the arousal they ignited inside him. “You just got done telling me you’re a Normal just like the rest of us, so don’t go putting any of that ‘you’re flawless’ bullshit on me.”
Nursey huffed in distaste, clearly annoyed with himself as much as with Dex. “Fuck. You’re right. Fine,” he continued with a glint in his eye Dex swore was trouble. “Then I’ll just have to explore every inch of you and find the one imperfection you’ve got hidden somewhere.”
Dex’s cheeks colored and he cursed being wrapped up in a man who knew his way around words. Nursey’s mouth was sinful without even needing to touch his skin.
“I can tell you three of my imperfections right now, you don’t have to go looking.” Dex didn’t like discussing his flaws, but the self-deprecation was easy and it continued to bring him back down from the heady high their heavy petting had induced.
“Dude, that is like, the un-sexiest thing you could possibly say.”
“I don’t think we should be getting back to the sexy right now,” Dex said seriously.
Nursey glanced away, mouth set in a contemplative twist.
“Yeah. Right again. Two points to Gryffindor.”
“Wow, okay. That says a lot if you think I’m a Gryffindor.”
“Is this turning into a Harry Potter discussion?”
“It could if you wanted it to,” Dex shrugged.
“Maybe some other time? It’s probably better if we stick to… us, tonight.”
Dex nodded. “We should leave. Get somewhere warmer,” he reasoned, acutely aware of Nursey’s current state of dress. If his own flannel and jeans weren’t enough for the cold April air, Nursey had to be positively freezing by now.
Nursey agreed with a soft hum, then brushed his hand gently against Dex’s cheek. The frozen touch of his fingers was all the confirmation Dex needed.
“Your place or mine?”
Nursey lived in the fancy upperclassman dorms overlooking The Pond, the ones with a full kitchen in each suite and private bathrooms. Nothing Dex could even dream of affording. Which had left him for a second year in the freshman dorms on East Quad, two to a small cement square, laughably labeled a room, and a communal shower severely lacking in both stalls and water pressure. If Dex had to choose where he’d rather spend the night, the answer was an easy one.
“Do you have your key?” Dex asked, highly doubting Nursey had anything stashed on his barely-covered person.
“Shit, no. I don’t have anything on me,” Nursey said, reflexively looking down and patting his shorts as if to check. “I left everything inside.”
“If it’s all the same to you, I’d rather not go back in there,” Dex remarked, embarrassment creeping its prickly way up the back of his neck.
“It’s not high on my list of things to do right now, no.”
“Are you embarrassed?” Dex asked, a little incredulous.
“Chyeah,” Nursey laughed in an attempt to cover his distress.
Dex tipped his head to the side. “Huh.” He took a step back and held his hand out to Nursey. “My place it is, then. Come on.”
Nursey slid his hand into Dex’s and they stepped down a small set of stairs leading to the footpath that skirted the quad.
“What do you mean, ‘huh’?” Nursey prodded as they fell out of earshot of the loud music still pumping from inside the building.
“You just never seem like anything bothers you,” Dex responded simply.
“Oh, plenty bothers me.”
“Yeah, I know that one first-hand,” Dex smirked and Nursey nudged him. “I meant like you don’t ever get embarrassed.”
“I get embarrassed, same as you.”
No one gets embarrassed the same as me, Dex thought ruefully.
“And that was definitely something to get embarrassed about,” Nursey added quietly.
“I dunno, you pulled off the full routine without tripping once. I’d say it was pretty successful.”
Nursey glanced at him, eyes baleful and flickering, and Dex turned away to hide his smile.
“So why did you do it, then?” Dex asked, truly curious now. “I know you said you couldn’t think of anything else, but that still doesn’t make any sense. I mean, what did you think it could possibly accomplish if you already thought I’d never like you like that?”
“Honestly,” Nursey started after a few moment’s contemplation. “It was kind of like… a way to get as close to what I wanted as I ever thought I could? Like living a fantasy.” He paused, attempting to collect and rearrange his feelings into something coherent.
“If I couldn’t have you, then I could at least pretend while I was dancing that you were watching because you wanted me. I figured it was a drag show, so if I did something weird or racy on stage it would just blend in with everything else. So I could be as sexual as I wanted and almost imagine it was just the two of us…”
“I really don’t understand most of that logic,” Dex said as his mind worked its way through Nursey’s explanation. “But I guess I kinda get it? And hey, it worked,” he added with a laugh and a squeeze of Nursey’s hand.
“Yeah…” Nursey replied, drawing out the word like it was something sticky, a thick and complex concept his brain had to chew on. “It did.”
The sound of their shoes clattering on old wood echoed as they crossed the footbridge over Samwell River.
“How did we even get here?” Nursey asked after a minute’s silence.
“The bridge?” Dex questioned. He knew from the hesitant edge in Nursey’s voice that he wasn’t talking about the bridge, but Dex had no idea how to ask what he really meant.
“Here,” Nursey replied, holding up their joined hands. He let them drop after a moment, then rubbed his thumb soothingly along the length of Dex’s own. “Me. With you. Together,” he finished, voice low and full of wonder.
It dawned on Dex, as he considered how unexpected the night had been, that his feelings had seemed to turn on a dime the moment Nursey had offered himself in a willing display of sexual frustration and energy. The thought certainly wasn’t appealing, and he couldn’t help but think that this was the reason for Nursey’s apprehension.
“It wasn’t, sudden, if that’s what you’re asking,” Dex tried after wading through a number of answers and tossing them aside. “Well, it kind of was, I guess. Shit,” he swore, scrubbing at his face with his free hand. His feelings were difficult enough to parse out on his own. Explaining them to someone else was a whole other can of worms he didn’t open very often.
“I don’t think it’s that I didn’t know,” he ventured again. “More like, I didn’t want to know? I’m not sure how to explain it…” He glanced at Nursey and saw the beginnings of a frown forming on his face, brows knit with sorrow that tore at Dex’s heart.
“I’m pretty thick sometimes,” he rushed to explain. “As I’m sure you know. It took me a long time to realize I also like guys sometimes, and that that was okay. Not that I was ever homophobic, just… it took a lot to change how I thought about myself.
“And it’s not like I’d never noticed you, because goddamn, the Haus is full of beautiful guys.” Dex laughed, shuddering a little with the gravity of it.
“Unfortunately, you were more than just good looks. You were the dick I fought with from day one, the guy I synched with on the ice, a teammate and then a friend and anything between us could have turned out horrible and ruined everything else…
“So I guess I just ignored it until I couldn’t anymore.”
They stopped in front of Tucker Hall and Dex turned, pivoting Nursey along with him so that they faced each other.
“I don’t want you just because you danced for me. It was a long time coming and I was just stupid enough to miss it the whole way here.”
Nursey heaved a sigh, relief apparent in his eyes, and Dex felt whole again. He hadn’t noticed the anxiety that had crept in over the last few minutes’ walk until it left him, washed him clean of guilt and fear that he’d caused Nursey even more distress.
“That was super cheesy, bro,” Nursey chirped.
“Don’t be expecting it every day now,” Dex grinned. “We can’t all recite The Notebook word-for-word.”
“Oh god,” Nursey groaned. “I will never make you watch romcoms, romances, or any other sappy chick flicks. Ever.”
“Ever?” Dex questioned, one eyebrow raised in a skeptical arch.
“I would never make you do anything,” Nursey responded. “Though I can promise you I both own and regularly watch Ten Things I Hate About You.”
Dex stifled a snort.
“What?”
“You sure you're the Lit student?”
Nursey punched his shoulder. “It’s Shakespeare. With young Heath Ledger.”
“Alright, alright,” Dex said, throwing his hands up with a smile. “I think I can deal with that.”
“Good.” His indignant frown softened before he leaned in to press a chaste kiss to Dex’s lips. “Now can we go inside before my dick freezes off?”
“Definitely.”
Dex pulled his student ID from his wallet and held it in front of the electronic reader. As the light flashed green, the door lock clicked and Nursey rushed to grab it before the mechanism could bolt back into place.
It was a quick walk up the two flights of stairs to Dex’s third floor room, and the dorm was blessedly silent for a Saturday night. Dex glanced at the clock at the end of the hallway and figured they’d gotten in just in time; the drag show would be wrapping up shortly if it hadn’t already, and soon campus would be full of rowdy students ready to enjoy the rest of their night. He figured there’d be a small party or two somewhere here tonight, but luckily the rooms in Tucker were too cramped to allow for anything more than a few people and an ipod filtered through a crappy pairs of speakers. Nothing too loud or obnoxious to disturb the rest of their evening.
For once Dex wasn’t jealous of Chowder’s room in the Haus.
“Oh man, this brings back memories,” Nursey reminisced as Dex unlocked his door with the tarnished metal key his RA had given him back in August. “God, the sock smell is worse than at Faber.”
“Yeah well,” Dex huffed. “Not everyone can afford Goldyng Hall.”
“We’ll be Hausmates next year,” Nursey smiled, turning around in the center of the tiny box Dex called home.
Dex blushed, his nerves tingling at the thought of sharing a space with Nursey next year. He reached for the homemade “do not disturb sign” on the desk and hid his face behind the door, taking a few seconds longer than necessary to hang it outside before slipping back into the room.
“Your roommate going to be okay by himself tonight?”
“Steve’s probably out getting schwasted,” Dex said offhand. “He won’t even make it back here tonight, just pass out on someone’s floor wherever.”
“That… doesn’t sound great,” Nursey remarked.
“Eh,” Dex shrugged, toeing off his shoes and indicating Nursey do the same. “He isn’t here most of the time, which is nice. And he’s a good kid when he’s sober.”
“Well that’s good then?” he said, voice ending on an uptick that suggested only half a question. Nursey flopped down on Dex’s bed and pulled his legs up to sit cross-legged up against the wall. He looked up expectantly, eyes warm, and Dex’s heart fluttered.
“I guess. Although,” Dex continued as he sat next to Nursey, gathering his hand in his own again. “I think next year’s is going to be better.”
“I thought you promised me no more mushy lines.” Nursey leaned in, obviously amused given the quirk of his lips, and waited.
Dex swallowed, the slow and intimate scene now playing out before him one-hundred times more alluring and intimidating than the swift pace they’d set previously.
“No more mushy lines,” he repeated, closing the small space between them with a kiss. He allowed Nursey to shift underneath him, garnering a better angle as their mouths slid open, lips moving in tandem to the steady beat of their hearts.
It was good, so good. Like electric fire through his veins and Dex reveled in their unhurried movements, fingers ghosting along arms and hands cupping cheeks, every touch fond and reverent. He let his tongue taste the bottom of Nursey’s lip, but nothing more.
They lingered on each other for what seemed like hours, languid kisses and gentle caresses carrying them through the dark spring night. Dex eventually felt his eyes grow heavy, the emotional ebb and flow of the day having wrung him dry, and his thoughts began to blur around the edges.
Nursey stood up, shocking Dex’s eyes open at the sudden loss, then pulled Dex with him.
“Time to lose these pants,” he said, looping his hands around Dex’s waist and giving a playful tug.
“Too sleepy,” Dex whined, well-aware that he could be awake again in a heartbeat if sex was really on the table. As it was, Dex felt that step best left for another night.
“No sex,” Nursey laughed as if he read Dex’s mind. “Not tonight, at least. But you’ll be more comfortable without these.”
“Mmm. Okay,” Dex acquiesced, not caring one way or the other if he slept in his jeans or not. He pulled his phone from the front pocket and fumbled with the button and zip, Nursey chuckling amusedly at his graceless attempts.
They crawled back into bed, this time pulling back Dex’s old blue comforter and wiggling under it. He reached up toward his desk for his phone charger and plugged it in, the screen illuminating once the connection was made. Messages from the team stared back at his bleary eyes, and Dex swiped his phone open to check them.
“Not texting your girlfriend, are you?” Nursey teased as he snuggled back into Dex. The press of his ass had parts of Dex more awake than his brain could currently process, and he frowned at his dick as he wrapped an arm around Nursey’s chest.
“Just the guys,” Dex answered, stifling a yawn. He held his phone out so they could both read as he scrolled through the messages.
Chowder:
Are you okay?
Chowder:
???
Holster:
Hey bro, sorry for what I said before. Hope we’re cool
Bitty:
I hope you found Nursey because his stuff is still here. The GSA asked us to take it so we did.
Chowder:
I tried to text Nursey but his stuff is here so he’s probably with you?
Ransom:
Bros where u at??? Kegstterrrrr
Jack:
I have to leave early tomorrow and I’m thinking you’re not coming to the party, so it was great to see you again. Tell Nursey t
Jack:
Sorry, this phone is too small for my fingers. Tell Nursey it was good to see him too. And, uh, good job with your performances.
Bitty:
You’re not answering so I’ll assume we’ll see you both tomorrow. I’ve got Nursey’s things safe in my room. Night y’all.
Holster:
Say hi to nursey for me ;)
Shitty:
Nursey. BRAH
Shitty:
BRAAAH
Lardo:
Sorry about Shits. His phone has been confiscated.
Lardo:
But I totally want deets tomorrow.
Chowder:
Goodnight, guys. Happy for you. (Hopefully!)
“What did Holster say earlier?”
“Nothing important,” Dex deflected, squeezing Nursey a little tighter.
“Mmm. Well, it seems we won’t have to announce anything tomorrow,” Nursey mumbled into the pillow and the implication set Dex’s heart alight.
“And what would we be announcing?” he questioned, already knowing yet wanting to hear Nursey say it just the same.
“That we’re together. That is,” Nursey added, turning around so that they faced each other. “If you want to be.”
“Yeah,” Dex replied simply. “I want to be.”
Nursey smiled as he burrowed into Dex’s chest.
“Chill.”
~*~