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This Must Be How It Feels (To Have A Home)

Summary:

The Golden Trio but trans and therefore better. There is a brief child abuse mention kind of, but this is mostly fluff to satisfy my enby soul. Inspired somewhat by atlantisairlock's fic 'wild horses run in me' which you should check out because it's lovely!!!!

Notes:

AN: three years later...
hello readers! i wrote and uploaded this terrible fanfic all the way back in 2017 when i was 17 - i am now 20 and this piece of work is something that, when i read it back, i am not that big a fan of lmao! however, due to recent comments from a certain jk r*wling I’ve noticed more people seem to be finding this fic and leaving kudos, which I really appreciate.

part of me wants to delete this work - for one thing, i think it’s terrible, and secondly, I don’t want it to come across as though I support jkr’s comments in anyway.

I’m going to leave it up though. People seem to like it, and I know most people who read this will be younger people searching for representation - which I can’t fault them for nor do I wish to take it away from them. If jkr’s transphobia has hurt you, i hope you find some comfort in the fact that fandom has always been a place that you can take someone’s work and essentially do what you want with it ! the author is dead, babeeeyyy!!!!

thank you everyone for reading, I wish you all the best, and I hope you are all staying safe in these truly fucking wild times

lots of love,

gee
(a non-binary lesbian who hates terfs <3)

tldr: jkr’s transphobia is absolutely vile and unacceptable. the anti-semitism and racism in her books is vile and unacceptable. i do not support her. this fan fiction was written when i was 17 and desperate for lgbt representation - nowadays, I urge you all to seek representation in books and media created by actual lgbt and poc creators, because jkr will never give you it.

Work Text:

Hermione knew she was a girl when she was nine-years-old. Her classmates looked at her funny when she said she wanted to wear skirts and grow her hair long, and when she asked her teachers why all she was met with were smiles concealing laughter and boys don’t wear dresses, dear. In the car ride home, her parents noticed something was upsetting her. They went to the library that weekend and sat for hours reading every book they could find about being transgender, and her father hugged her tight and said that no matter who she wants to be, she will always be his child.

Two years later, she jumped on the Hogwarts express with her hair in pigtails, a pleated skirt, and a grin.

 

For Harry, it took longer for him to realise that he didn’t feel at home in his own body. The first eleven years of his life consisted of him being called a freak for reasons he couldn’t understand and living in fear of his uncle - he didn’t really have much time to think about his own identity when his relatives were so determined to pretend that he didn’t even exist. It wasn’t until he was halfway through his first year at Hogwarts where he realised that it felt like something sharp had lodged itself in his stomach on the rare occasion somebody called him Harriet instead of his nickname, and he finally had a home and people who cared about him, people who didn’t call him a freak and oh God, what if he was a freak and these new friends would hate him as much as the Dursleys what if -

It’s his third year when he decides to tell Hermione and Ron. He had already cut his hair during second year (when his aunt saw him she yelled and he didn’t get dinner for a week, but it was worth it - it’s not like they liked his hair anyway, the dark mop ‘too much like his father’s’ for their liking) and he had long since eradicated every feminine piece of clothing from his belongings (it didn’t take long, seeing as most of his wardrobe consisted of hand-me-downs from Dudley). Second year was also when he started asking Hermione if she knew what was up with him, and she gave him book after book and hug after hug without ever asking any questions. Hermione cries when he tells them even though he’s sure she already knew and hugs him so tight that he thinks he might burst. Ron just thumps him on the shoulder and says that he’s too ugly to be a girl anyway, but the look in his eyes is reassuring and kind and Harry thinks that maybe for once, life is going to let him be happy.

 

Ron knew since he was six. he cut off all his hair with his mum's scissors, almost giving her a heart attack, and demanded that everyone call him Ron from now on. His brothers made fun of him at first, but eventually they got bored and they started including him in their games. On the first day of Hogwarts, he's scared that the staircase to his dorm will throw him down (he's heard lots of stories from the twins about trying to sneak into the girl's dorms) but his mum says that if it does, he should yell at it until it lets him up. If that doesn't work, she says he should write to her and she will come and yell at it, and Ron grins because if Molly Weasley tells you to do something, you do what she says. He meets a dark-skinned girl with messy hair who turns out to be the girl who lived, which is awesome, even if she does prefer to be called Harry. He glares at the girl who comes into their train carriage looking for a toad and she glares at him back, before smiling at Harry and walking away. He forgets about her and talks to Harry about how awesome this year is going to be. When he makes his way up the stairs without getting thrown on his butt, he barely notices Harry having problems across the room. The stairs going up to the girl's dorms wobble where Harry stands, making her cling onto the railing for dear life. Ron glances in his dorm to see one spare bed. He looks back over at his new friend, and calls them over.