Chapter Text
lance added hunk, pidge, keith, shiro, allura, matt, shay to chat
lance changed chat name to 2018 BITCHES
lance: new years eve is in a few days and we haven't PLANNED ANYTHING are we getting together?
lance: i need to know so i can get parental approval in time
pidge: lets do it
lance: awesome. Where?
hunk: I’d offer but my parents will be out
matt: shiro will host!
pidge: fuck yeah let’s goooo
hunk: I’ll bake something! I just got these peppermint chips and really just want to use them in something
pidge: FUCK YEAH LETS GOOOOO
allura: I’m in!
shiro: I supPOSE I’m in
matt: as if you wouldn’t want to
shiro: you just want to feel superior since we’re the only ones above legal drinking age
matt: who, me?
pidge: exposed
keith: proposal to keep shatt sober all night
lance: seconded. All those in favor?
pidge: aye
hunk: aye
allura: aye
shay: aye
matt: nay
shiro: aye
matt: betrayed by my own boyfriend
shiro: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
lance: whaAAAAAAT
shiro: one time thing
lance: damn
lance: anyway
lance: SINCE we are talking about new years already ;)
lance: dibs on flipping during paranoia
pidge: FUCK
shay: what?
lance: ;)
pidge: you little shit
shay: what's paranoia?
lance: *gasp*
keith: drama queen
lance: *gASP*
pidge: keith rises from the deep to roast you
lance: *GASP*
matt: allow me
matt: paranoia is this game where you sit in a circle and take turns asking questions. If I'm sitting next to lance, I’ll whisper a question so nobody else can hear, and he announces his answer to the circle. The answer has to be a person in the circle, so the question has to be like “who probably will end up as a stripper” or something of that format
pidge: lance
matt: true
lance: who wouldn't want a piece of this!??
pidge: aro and/or ace squad assemble!
keith: you called?
hunk: sorry lance
lance: you know what fight me
keith: oh that sounds like a good idea
lance: i take it back
matt: and then someone flips a phone. Screen up, the circle hears the question. Screen down, the question stays secret
shay: oh yikes
lance: don't worry, I flip the phone fairly
pidge: are you accusing me of cheating?
lance: Noooooo
lance: I'm just saying, I've never seen the phone land screen down when you flip and the answer was you
pidge: how dare
hunk: do we /have/ to?
lance: hunk, my man, my main man,
lance: there’s no way we’re not playing
hunk: “-and it won't get /that/ dirty”
lance: and it won't get /that/ dirty
lance: wait
pidge: phfffffft
matt: yes, we have to
shiro: just don't sit by matt. Or lance
pidge: ;)
shiro: or pidge
keith: ;)
shiro: *just sit by me or allura
allura: ;)
shiro: *sigh*
shay > pidge
shay: question
pidge: what's up?
shay: didn't want to look out of the loop in the big GC, but what's aro ace squad?
pidge: oh sorry
pidge: aro is short for aromantic, which means the person doesn't feel romantic attraction to any gender, and ace is short for asexual, which means the person doesn't feel sexual attraction to any gender
pidge: aro and/or ace squad is those of us that are aro and/or ace
shay: gotcha. Is it rude to ask people what they identify as ?
pidge: nah. Not with us, at least. Some people get touchy, but we're pretty chill
pidge: sorry, you fit in so well w our friend group I forgot you've only been running with us a few weeks lol
shay: I think that's a good thing
pidge: it is!
2018 BITCHES
shay: hey guys out of curiosity can I ask what your orientations are? So I'm not out of the loop?
pidge: absolutely! I'm aro/ace
allura: I'm pan
lance: just call me nsync BC I'm ~bi bi bi~
shiro: I’m bi
matt: biromantic homosexual
hunk: heteromantic ace
pidge: and idk where keith is but he’s aro/ace too
shay: okay, cool!
lance: what about you?
shay: i never really thought about it
shay: i’m pretty sure i’m straight though
lance: nothing wrong with that!
lance > hunk
lance: well there you go
hunk: lance
lance: you know she’s straight. You’re mostly straight
hunk: laaaaance.
lance: c’mon man
lance: oh!
lance: I could prob get allura to find out if she likes you ;)
hunk: do not
hunk: dude it’s not a big deal
lance: too late
lance: already asked her
hunk: no you didn’t
lance: you’re right, I didn’t
lance > allura
lance: hey allura could you do me a favor?
hunk > lance
hunk: i know what suspicious silence means
hunk: do not
allura > lance
allura: what’s the favor?
lance: could you maybe possibly subtly figure out if shay likes anyone?
allura: ...lance
hunk > lance
hunk: LANCE
lance > allura
lance: hunk’s too shy to ask
allura: hunk? awww of course i’ll find out!
lance: wait would you not have if it was me?????
allura: absolutely not
allura: you and her would be weird
lance: i mean you’re right
lance: still. Wow.
hunk > lance
hunk: LANCE
lance: NOW i did
hunk: dammit lance
lance: what are best friends for?
hunk: betrayal, apparently