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Shroomy, the Magical 'shroom

Summary:

“I’m sorry,” Keith said, turning his body to fully face the stoner. “I think I misheard. Did you just say you’re making a bong?”

 

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In art class, the children are going to be learning pottery.
Of course someone is going to make a bong.

Notes:

I'mma say this now: this did happen.
My stoner friend in our art class made a bong. The teacher either didn't notice, or she didn't care.

May the legacy of Shroomy live on.

Work Text:

Art class was usually a good hour. The teacher, who had told the class to just call him Antok, had been teaching them the basics of pottery before letting them all proceed and make whatever they wanted.

 

At one table sat Keith, Lance, Hunk and Pidge, talking with each other about what they were going to make. Also at that table was Rolo who was sketching out something in a notebook.
“I think I’m just gonna make a mug.” Keith said, sighing. “That’d be easy, right?”
“We’re all going to make mugs, Keith.” Pidge said, looking over her shoulder. “They’re literally the easiest thing in the world.”

 

“I heard Nyma’s attempt at a mug failed horribly, though.” the dark haired boy said, his eyes trailing over to Rolo, “Didn’t you say hers wound up so tiny it was more like a candle holder?”
“Huh?” Rolo finally looked up, blinking slowly before he realized he was being spoken to. “Oh, yeah.” he grinned, moving his hands to show the rough size of the item in question. “It was tiny. She was so pissed! She said she swore she made it bigger.”
“That’s what she said.” Lance smirked, cackling when Hunk smacked him in the shoulder. “What? She did! Rolo said so!”
“What? Are you in middle school?” Hunk said, shaking his head. “Anyway, I’m gonna try and make a plate or something.”

 

“I’m making a vase.” Lance said, looking over to Keith, “And then I’m putting flowers in it and giving it to you, so you can like put it up in your dorm room.”
“And they say romance is dead.” Keith teased, smiling back towards his boyfriend. Pidge held back her laughter.

 

“Save the goo-goo eyes for when you’re by yourselves.” she said before looking over to Rolo, who’d gone back to drawing. “What about you? What are you going to make?”

 

“A bong.”

 

The table fell silent.
“I’m sorry,” Keith said, turning his body to fully face the stoner. “I think I misheard. Did you just say you’re making a bong?”
“Yup.” Rolo grinned, turning the paper around to show the group, revealing the plans for a mushroom shaped bong. “I’m calling him Shroomy.”
“Of course you are.” the raven haired boy said, sighing. He had to admit, though, the outline for Shroomy was really well done.

 

“Antok is not going to let you make a bong.” Hunk said, looking to the paper.
“It’s Antok, though,” Lance said, crossing his arms. “He lets us get away with a lot of things.”
“We’ve outright listened to music on our iPods and he never batted an eye.” Keith said, but Pidge shook her head.
“Yeah, but a bong? You think he’s just gonna overlook that?”

 

“I’m making Shroomy.” Rolo said, standing up to head to one of the pottery wheels.
“Godspeed, brave sir.” Keith said, watching as he made his way to the back of the classroom.

 

“Ten bucks he gets caught before it’s finished.” Pidge said, propping her head in her hand.
“You’re on.” Keith said, huffing.

 

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

 

Everything had gone through it’s first round of firing, and the group sat at their table carefully painting their items. Keith’s mug was a little misshapen, but still looked like it could be used. Pidge’s looked moderately better, but her handle had cracked in half, so she was calling it a wonky bowl (“I’ll drink soup out of it and it will be perfect!”). Hunk’s plate was probably the best out of the lot and he hummed happily as he glazed it. Lance’s vase had tilted to the side, but Keith had assured him that he loved it and would keep it in his room.

 

However, everyone was shocked when Rolo sat down with his project and looked it over before he began to glaze it.
“I can’t believe it survived this long.” Pidge said, watching as Rolo splattered the bong with red and purple and green.
“Shroomy, the magical 'shroom.” Rolo muttered under his breath, before grinning and picked up some white and began to draw a wide, toothy grin and a set of eyes.

 

“That thing is going to gain sentience.” Lance said, eying the piece suspiciously. “I bet you it’ll come to life and eat all your Doritos.”
“I don’t eat Doritos.” the stoner said, absentmindedly.
“He likes Funyuns.” Keith said, causing the blond boy to nod.

 

“Then he’ll eat all your Funyuns.” the Cuban amended.

“Shroomy wouldn’t do that.” Rolo huffed, finishing the face before going back to decorating the rest of the bong.
“Why are we talking about this bong like it’s a real person?” Hunk finally asked, looking up from his plate.
“Because I bet you once Rolo uses it, Shroomy is going to be talking to him.” Pidge grumbled.

 

Silence fell on the table, before everyone broke out into giggles when Rolo turned his bong to the group, pitching his voice slightly. “You wanna hiiiit iiiit?”
“Rolo, what the fuck?” Keith snorted, covering his mouth to try and keep quiet.
“I didn’t say that,” the stoner said, grinning, “Shroomy did.”
“Lord help us.” Pidge groaned, rubbing her head.

 

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

 

Everything was fired one last time and the group all gathered around Rolo who was proudly showing off his bong.
“Antok didn’t say a damn word.” Pidge said, gaping at the grinning mushroom in the stoner’s hands.

 

“Maybe he really didn’t notice.” Lance said, frowning as he gently touched the mushroom. Everyone jumped when a throat cleared and looked up, seeing Antok staring them down.

“I noticed.” he said, looking down to Rolo, who only grinned instead of looking ashamed. “I trust you won’t be using that.”
“Me? Never.” Rolo said, adjusting his hold on his bong, cradling it like a child.
Antok only shook his head before he walked off, and everyone stared at his back.

 

“Did… he just say he didn’t care?” Hunk said. “Like, I mean he didn’t say it out right but…”
“Antok just became the best teacher ever.” Keith said, gaping slightly. “He just let you make a bong in his class.”

 

“But he didn’t say anything about smoking in general.” Rolo said, before looking back towards Keith and grinned, a smile that matched his new bong. He adjusted his hold on the object and held it up, like he was Rafiki raising Simba for the world to see.
“Long live Shroomy!”

 

Everyone had started to leave before Keith cleared his throat.
“I believe I’m here to collect ten bucks.” he said, holding out a hand towards Pidge.
“But he got caught!” Pidge said, standing straighter. “Don’t you try to cheat me out of my money!” she glared, but Keith shook his head.
“You said caught before it’s finished.” he said, making a grabbing motion with his hand. “Rolo finished Shroomy.”
“Antok noticed before!”
“He didn’t say anything until after, so it doesn’t count!”
“Fuck you, you don’t count!”

 

“Children, get to your next class!” Antok snapped from inside the classroom.

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