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The two gems continued to sob for another five minutes before Pearl managed to calm herself. Standing, she placed a hand on Sapphire’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze and taking a few steps back. “Come on,” she whispered. “Let’s go downstairs and we’ll sit down. I’ll make some tea, okay?”
The seer only nodded, sniffing and letting out a small sob. Pearl gave her a sympathetic pat on the shoulder before turning towards the stairs and taking them slowly, making sure Sapphire would trail behind her. “What if they can’t find her?” came the question. “What if they never find her? I keep looking to see where she could be or if she’ll come back and I can’t…”
Pearl stopped her path towards the kitchen to turn back to Sapphire, who was on the verge of working herself back up into a frenzy. Turning the smaller gem towards the couch, asking, “Why don’t we just put a pause on the future vision, hmm?”
“Oh,” the seer huffed, taking a seat on the couch. “Why don’t I also just pluck out my eye while I’m at it?” Pearl shot her a look that showed the comment was neither warranted or appreciated, causing the seer to blush in embarrassment. “Sorry,” she murmured.
The thinner gem continued on to the kitchen and began the process of making tea. Pearl didn’t really drink the tea, or anything else, however she enjoyed the steps it took to create the drink and the warmth that came from the mug that surrounded the liquid when ready to drink. Pearl couldn’t remember if Sapphire liked eating and drinking or not, but sometimes that wasn’t the point of the tea; the point was to bring some comfort during this time.
The two remained quiet until the kettle whistle went off and Pearl filled two mugs before bringing them over the gem sitting quietly on the couch. Seated next to the smaller gem, Pearl tried to come up with something to say, but was distracted by Sapphire’s quiet, “What if she doesn’t come back?”
“Of course she’ll come back,” Pearl insisted.
“You don’t know that,” Sapphire sniffed. “I was so horrible to her, I wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t.”
Pearl opened her mouth to say something, but stopped herself. She had never imagined this would be the outcome of the secret she had kept for millennia and the guilt was heavier than she expected. To be honest, despite wanting to reveal what she knew, Pearl had been apprehensive and had always thought Rose would eventually reveal the truth, allowing the weight of keeping the secret to be lifted from their shoulders.
“I’ve known you and Ruby for a long time,” she whispered. Pearl chuckled slightly. “I watched the two of you grow into this…incredible relationship. I meant what I said, back in that gem ship…you and Ruby have the perfect relationship; not because you’re able to come together and stay together as Garnet, but because you just…you fit together so well.” Glancing to her right, Pearl looked up at the portrait that hung by the door. “For a very long time, I thought I had that with her,” she continued. “I see now that…that maybe it was what I wanted to see and Greg…Greg was the one that made her truly happy.”
“You made her happy, too,” Sapphire insisted. “If you didn’t, she wouldn’t have taken your suggestion on visiting Earth and seeing the people, things, and places that we fought…that we continue to fight for and protect.” Turning away, Sapphire looked down at her tea. “I’m not sure what’s more upsetting – the fact that she didn’t trust us to confide in us or that it’s made us question everything we’ve believed.”
That did tear at Pearl. She above all of them had been Rose’s confidante, so to discover their leader, her Diamond, had been keeping secrets from her as well; it was one thing for a leader to keep certain things to themselves in order to keep the peace during difficult situations, that’s why they understood her actions involving Bismuth. But after the Diamonds had given their final attack, when it was just the four of them on the ground, dazed, confused, and frightened of the horrific sights and sounds that were now coming from gems they fought with and against…
When they had found Amethyst and were training her to fight for the planet by helping to secure their former comrades and enemies so one day they might be able to reverse what had been done…
When she introduced them to Greg, when she told them she was having Steven…
There were so many times Rose could’ve told them the truth, told her the truth, and never did. During the war was one thing, when they had to consider the others, what they were fighting for, and keeping the peace for that the Earth could be free and even immediately afterwards, when they were confronted with corruption, trying to understand what had happened, and how they could help – that was one thing.
But once they had found Amethyst, Rose should’ve told them, Garnet at least, the truth; when she had announced she was having a baby, Rose should’ve told her – them – what this would mean, what she had planned for Steven as he got older, so he would understand her and know her. Pearl had no idea about Lion, had no idea about Bismuth, or anything else the pink feline might have buried in that mane of his. In the end, Sapphire was right –
Rose didn’t trust them, not even her at the end of the day.
Afternoon soon turned to evening and evening began to darken into night. Ordinarily, Pearl would be increasingly concerned that Steven hadn’t returned home yet, but given the circumstances, she knew the boy was with Amethyst and hopefully they were safe. It didn’t stop her from stopping by the car wash however, just to see Greg and maybe tell him everything that had happened (and, to be honest, she was hoping that she’d be able to find not only Steven and Amethyst there, but Ruby as well), but she was disappointed to find the car wash closed and the familiar Mr. Universe van nowhere in sight.
That…did concern her slightly, but the thin gem managed to push down her anxiety. If Greg was gone, it probably meant he was with Steven and Amethyst, and if they were lucky, Ruby too. After everything, it would do her no good to worry about the well being of Steven or anyone, so Pearl quickly made her way back to the beach house. Sapphire wasn’t on the couch when she returned and the thought that the seer may have fled again enter briefly before the temple door opened, revealing the very gem she had been thinking of.
“I’m in here,” the blue gem replied. “I know you were worried.”
Nodding, Pearl made an internal sigh, watching as the seer stepped back inside what Pearl remembered being a lovely and scenic forest backdrop that passed for the environment Sapphire called her room inside the temple. It had been a long time since Sapphire had been in this part of the temple, her own room, something she had created and designed when the group had founded the temple and the official base of the Crystal Gems.
It was a rather bittersweet location – she had designed it after the grassy area she and Ruby had finally discussed what happened in the Cloud Arena when they had first formed Garnet. They had explored much of their surrounding area before taking a break to look up at the strange sky; back then, things had been so new to them – the planet, themselves, each other, and the strange being they had created.
They had danced around the topic upon first arriving, but had never actually addressed it until then, with Ruby hesitantly broaching the subject and how even she couldn’t stop thinking about what they had and what they had become. She had been so apologetic for fusing with the high-class gem, despite the fact that if they hadn’t, Sapphire would’ve found herself within her gem back on Homeworld.
Sapphire would never and could never regret running off with Ruby, even if it meant leaving her life behind. Ruby had saved her and she had repaid that with harsh words that questioned everything that had ever happened between them. It was just a shock! Rose Quartz, their leader and friend, hadn’t even truly been real, just a manifestation of Pink Diamond’s desire to spare the Earth by any means necessary.
The blue gem could understand that part, she could, after Pearl had explained it; what she couldn’t understand was why Rose had never told them. The war had been over for more than five thousand years and if not for recent events, there had been no indication that Homeworld even still had their eye on the planet. Why couldn’t they have come clean then?
Somewhere in her memory, she recalled the righteous fury and anger Ruby had upon learning about Pearl and the communication hub. It wasn’t just about wasting their time and effort following a false lead, it wasn’t even truly about fusion – it had been about a friend betraying their trust. Pearl, above all, she have known better; she had known them and watched them grow into Garnet, so she should’ve known that what she was doing was a direct slap in the face to them.
It didn’t help that this went right on top discovering what had been done to their friends under the Kindergarten, the gem experiments, the sting of Jasper’s words coming from her own teammates…At the time, the seer had tried to be reasonable; this disagreement, this betrayal wouldn’t last long, in fact Sapphire was looking forward to when it would be resolved and it would be. Ruby had just gotten herself worked up for no reason at all.
But now…now the gem was on the other hand, wasn’t it? This time it was Sapphire herself who had been full of anger and hurt and had lashed out in the worst possible way. She tried to see when Ruby would return, but her vision failed her, only coming up with the red gem dressed in a western attire for no other purpose than to throw her visions out in one foul swoop. But what if that was a sign? What if Ruby’s new dress was her shedding her old uniform and finding something new? Something that did not have room for Sapphire?
That was a devastating thought, but a certain possibility, given the things she said. Once again, a decision by Rose Quartz had ultimately changed the course of her life and not for its betterment.
Two days later, Sapphire was convinced Ruby wasn’t coming back. That of course did nothing to alleviate Pearl’s worry in that Steven, Amethyst, and Greg were also missing and it wasn’t like Greg to just up and leave without notifying one them, so the logical conclusion was that all four of them were together or Greg was helping the two younger gems look for the third. That gave the taller gem some comfort, but not by much.
It of course didn’t help that Sapphire’s visions seemed to only focus on the gloom and doom of it all. She had lost Ruby and with Ruby gone, it most likely meant Steven, Amethyst, and Greg were gone with her, probably helping her lead a new life that was future vision and Sapphire free. Honestly, Pearl couldn’t ever remember Sapphire being so…well, negative; true, the very nature of their gift tended to create a rather, off putting demeanor – to the point and extremely blunt about it – but Sapphire had always proven to…well, be above all that.
As was their custom for the last few days, Pearl made some tea and sat two tea cups on the coffee table. While the thin gem use the heat from the cup to soothe her fraying nerves, she noticed Sapphire taking a few automatic sips every now and then, suddenly reminding Pearl that Garnet – and to that extent, Ruby and Sapphire – did tend to enjoy eating and drinking on occasion. It was never to excess the way Amethyst went after anything that she deemed edible, but it also wasn’t on the refusal Pearl tended to have when it came to trying human cuisine.
It seemed to be something else that reminded Pearl that she hadn’t come as far as she may have liked or bragged about. Everything she had done, she had done for Rose, to make her happy, to see the wide smile on her beautiful face and see those eyes light up in excitement. It had been so easy to gloss over…everything, to see her as ultimate perfection…her Diamond. Pearl had come to a lot of conclusions over the years, with many centered on how she truly viewed Rose and how Rose viewed her.
For the first time ever, Pearl had admitted to herself and someone else that Rose had been selfish in some regards, possibly every regard. It seemed like such a small thing, but it was truly a big deal; a few months ago she had managed to find common ground with Greg, something she never thought possible despite all they truly had in common. They had both agreed that Rose usually did what she wanted and sometimes, that never bolded well for those left in her wake.
And startlingly, Pearl hadn’t told Sapphire and Steven to tear down Rose; on the contrary, she had wanted to tell them the truth, the whole truth of everything. They had all suffered in the wake of Rose’s secrets and this was just one more to add to the list, but Pearl was going to make sure it was the last – because she had been a part of that secrecy and she now wanted to be a part of the truth.
She wasn’t sure how long the two sat in compatible, though saddened quiet, but at some point Pearl’s mind seemed to conjure up a memory of the smaller gems and she couldn’t help but chuckle at it, causing the seer to turn slightly at the interruption. “Do you remember when Rose and I would have meetings with you,” she began, smiling. “Back when you and Ruby were still adjusting to being Garnet? The two of us would call you over and start discussing something with you that we’d hoped you’d be able to assist with.”
Sapphire nodded, uncertain where this story was headed. “I remember.”
“That’s when we knew the two of you had feelings for each other,” the thinner gem continued. “We’d be talking to you and we’d ask a question, but you had completely tuned us out. It didn’t take long to figure out why – any time Ruby was in the vicinity, your whole focus shifted from us to her.”
Sapphire couldn’t stop the blush if she tried. Oh yes, she remembered those days very clearly and if she was honest with herself, and many of their comrades had no issue reminding the two, they hadn’t been exactly subtle when it came to their attraction to one another; the seer especially had dropped any pretense once she realized the emotions she felt were primarily directed towards Ruby.
Smiling, she chuckled and responded with, “As Ruby would say, I just can’t say no to such a pretty face.”
Pearl’s smile faltered slightly. “I know I’ve disappointed you,” she whispered. “And it’s not the first time that we’ve…that I’ve done something that has hurt you or the others. And I’m so sorry. Please believe me when I say that I never had any intention of holding this from you and I always felt, believed that Rose would tell you the truth one day.
“I should’ve done better,” she continued. “I should’ve insisted that we come clean about everything, but back then…back then, I still wanted to make her happy. I was still following my programming, even when I supposed to be a symbol of someone who didn’t. And I did follow Rose, but not because of what my role had been, was, I know it sounds horrible, but I did things on my own, I did! And not because of Rose, but…”
Pearl made a noise of frustration. How could she adequately tell Sapphire the whole picture? She knew what this new information meant and she could only blame herself for perpetuating a lie.
“But because you’re Pearl,” Sapphire concluded, looking at the former renegade. And Sapphire did understand; Pearl may have initially followed Rose because of Homeworld programming and maybe she did too, but Pearl had gone on to do many things not because Rose told her to, but because she wanted to.
“I’m still upset,” the seer admitted. “About Rose and Pink, but…Rose didn’t make us follow her and she certainly had no bearing on my feelings for Ruby. Yes, the two of you facilitated our being placed together and our first-time fusing, but my falling in love with Ruby had nothing to do with the two of you, other having your support when we realized what it all meant.”
Pearl gave the gem a small smile. “That’s why I know Ruby will come back,” she stated. “She loves you, Sapphire and very few things would ever keep her away from you.”
While it was helpful in hearing, the blue gem was still worried. “I hope so,” she whispered. “Because I’d like to tell her those things myself.”
And that was the problem – until Ruby returned, she would continue to think that Sapphire had meant those horrible things. How could Sapphire ever doubt their love like that? There were so many things that she was unsure about, but never that; never them. Ruby was…Ruby was fresh air and blue skies and…just overall happiness.
How could she have ever questioned that?
The door to the beach house opened and closed, revealing the brightening skies outside, but more importantly…
“Steven!”
Sapphire hurried quickly to the young boy, noting his facial expression. “Did you find Ruby?”
“She’s outside,” came his reply and once again, Sapphire was struck with the fact that she couldn’t get an appropriate read on the teenager. Normally so bright and chipper, the look he gave her signaled something had be wrong. They had been gone for nearly three days, probably the most she and Ruby had ever spent apart, even when they had been poofed. “She’s got something to say to you.”
This was it. This was the choice Sapphire would need to live with should Ruby decide that her words had gone too far. She rushed past Steven, missing the secret smile he sent Pearl’s way, and stood on the porch deck. There in the distance was Ruby, strangely dressed as a cowboy and sat on top of a horse.
Well, her precognition was at least right in that regard, but it meant she didn’t know and she was almost afraid to find out. But she wasn’t going to let Ruby leave without hearing her apology first.
“Ruby!”