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Eiji awoke to the sound of the shower running in the bathroom. He never slept particularly well when Ash was gone throughout the night, always worried he would be awoken in a hurry to find something gone horribly wrong. But eventually, sleep won over and he drifted off whether or not he wanted to, this time draped unceremoniously across the top of his bed. When he opened his eyes, the clock read 5:26am, and light was beginning to brighten the room, though graciously there were no rays of sun just yet. Rolling over sleepily, he waited tiredly for Ash to exit the bathroom as he heard the water shut off. He appeared only a few moments later, dressed comfortably and toweling off his wet hair, comb in hand.
“Didn’t mean to wake you,” he said quietly. He always spoke softer to him when they were alone.
Eiji simply stared, transfixed. Without thinking, he opened his mouth and spoke: “Can I brush your hair?”
Normally, Ash might’ve laughed it off as a silly request, but this time his eyes shifted to the side. It was something they had been discussing, trying. Ash was no stranger to trauma, and it had bled into every aspect of his life. Most egregiously though, was how it affected his budding relationship with Eiji. When it had begun, Ash had brushed off Eiji’s worries over intimacy, claiming he was perfectly fine with sex. He was not. He stiffened when touched, and Eiji could practically see his skin crawling. Ash offered himself up, allowed himself to be touched, but rather than enjoy the moment, he uncomfortably waited with eyes closed for the moment to pass. Eiji had known from the start that Ash would need time to heal, but had apparently underestimated just how carefully he would need to handle even the smallest steps.
They had eventually agreed to small acts of touch - nothing sexual, there was no point in trying to force something that would not be enjoyable to either of them. Ash had 11 years of painful conditioning to overcome, and so the journey had not been easy. But slowly and surely, he was beginning to soften to Eiji’s calm and careful touch. Touch was no longer a warning sign - a red flag that something awful was about to happen. Instead, it signaled the soft caress of a lover, the kind touch of someone who was happy just to see him, to be near him.
“Just the hair?” He asked after considering.
“Mmm, yeah,” Eiji said as he sat up and yawned. “And probably your head I guess...maybe your shoulders too? Is it ok?”
Ash paused for a moment, then swallowed. “Ok.”
He walked over slowly as Eiji straightened up. “Where do you want me?”
“You get to sit on the floor!” Eiji announced with a cheeky grin. He spread his legs and patted his knees. “I need to be able to reach your head easily,” he clarified.
Ash nodded and settled down on the carpeted floor between Eiji’s knees, tossing the towel on his shoulders to the now unkempt bed. After leaning back against the mattress, he reached back and handed Eiji the comb. “Go nuts.”
Eiji took the comb and looked over his lover. His bright blond hair had been the cause of pain in his life many times before. And what a shame, Eiji thought. It's beautiful. Deciding to start from the right, he pulled the comb through his softly conditioned locks, watching with satisfaction as it sailed through cleanly. Eiji had always been calmed by haircuts himself, and so hoped Ash had no tragic history involving barbers. If he was right, perhaps Ash would find the act as relaxing as he did.
“Hey, Ash?” He asked suddenly.
“Mm?”
“Who cuts your hair?”
Ash snorted quietly below him. “What, you want a damn hairdresser recommendation now? It’s New York, I’m sure you can find your own.”
Oh good, he thought. No trauma there at least.
For a while they sat quietly while Eiji slowly and carefully pulled the comb through his wet hair, watching with satisfaction as the wild and knotted hairs straightened out perfectly. It was hard not to touch, and Ash had given him permission anyways, so Eiji ran his fingers through the now neat hair, enjoying the soft feeling. He paused for a moment, waiting to see if Ash would tense below him, but he seemed fine. In fact, he was breathing softly and slowly, leaning his head towards Eiji as he gently ran fingers down his hair, starting from the hair at Ash's temples down to the tips, knuckles softly brushing the back of his neck.
Taking the towel, he carefully patted down the ends of his shoulder-length hair, soaking out the remaining water. And once the water had been carefully pressed from his hair, it seemed stiff, so Eiji took the liberty of combing through it once again, and then a few more times, just to make sure the job was done thoroughly.
Finally, it seemed to be good enough. “There.” He announced. “Ash?”
The blond had sunk down lazily, head resting gently on his Eiji’s own knee. His eyes were closed, a look of contentment on his face.
“Ash,” Eiji murmured softly again. “Do you want to sleep in my bed?” He offered. He ran his hand gently down his lover’s head down to his shoulder, squeezing lightly to wake him up.
Ash couldn’t seem to muster the energy to speak, but he sleepily nodded from the floor, before slowly picking himself up and crawling onto the bed as Eiji moved out of the way. Collapsing onto Eiji’s pillow, he sighed contentedly.
Smiling, Eiji pulled the comforter out from under Ash’s feet and laid the heavy blanket on top of him. The sun's rays were now beginning to pierce through the window, and Eiji thought that it was the perfect morning for a cup of coffee. As he prepared the coffee machine, Eiji thought to himself that perhaps it wouldn’t make for such a bad nighttime ritual after all.