Chapter Text
Listed pinched the bridge of his nose and Kryten looked up anxiously from his laundry folding. The crashing noises and swearing seemed to be getting louder by the minute.
Cat appeared in the doorway brandishing his hair dryer. “My hairdryer just exploded! What gives?”
“It’s Rimmer”, sighed Lister, he’s in another one of his rages.” Almost as soon as he had finished speaking, the lights in the room began to flare and dim. Sustaining hard-light holograms required an incredible amount of power, and so it was normal for electronic devices to malfunction when Rimmer’s bee was overloading.
“Well I’m trying to do my hair!” Cat moaned. “And after that I’m gonna need my catnap, and you know what happens if I don’t get my sleep! Can’t you do something about the noise, bud?!”
“He’s just having a bad day” said Lister, wincing as another loud crash was heard.
“If I may venture to say sir, perhaps you should attempt to placate him as I worry very much for the state of the ship.” Kryten said as he folded Listers underwear.
Lister sighed..why did it always come down to him to calm Rimmer down, it wasn’t so bad when he was soft-light, but the hard-light drive Legion had granted him, made these violent rages so much more destructive, and in some cases dangerous. Lister thought back to the week before, when he had very nearly had a refrigerator inserted in his rear end.
“I wonder what’s upset him this time...”
Cat piped up. “No clue buddy, all I know is one minute I’m telling him how much his family hated him, and the next he storms on out of here!”
Both Lister and Kryten stared at him. Cat retained his innocent facial expression and replied “What did I say now??”
At this Lister lost his temper, “What the bleedin hell were you thinking of!? You NEVER talk to Rimmer about his family, EVER!” At this Cat shrank back a bit , “Sorry bud”, he said. sounding almost genuinely apologetic, “I was just trying to make conversation.”
“Fan-smeggintastic! So now I’ve gotta go in there and clear up your mess!?” Lister stormed out of the room and set off to find Rimmer.
In the wake of Lister’s exit, Kryten gave Cat a long hard stare to which the feline replied “Why’s everyone lookin’ at me funny today?!”
Lister wandered down the corridor following the sound of Rimmers rage, thinking why does the universe see fit to grant the angriest member of the crew with inhuman strength and, on top of that, make him completely indestructible?”
He finally located the source of the noise in the canteen closest to their bunk room.
The canteen was in chaos, tables and chairs had been upended, vending machines pulled off the walls and smashed. Lister was also horrified to see a fist mark in the wall. He did a quick sidestep to avoid the exploding light bulb above his head.
Much to his relief, Rimmer seemed to have ceased his destruction, for the time being anyway. The hologram was sat in the corner of the canteen facing away from him. Lister ventured cautiously in and said the most neutral thing he could think of.
“Hey man, how you doin?”
He was met with silence, the only sound being that of another lightbulb exploding overhead.
The silence continued for about five minutes or so, Lister standing with his hands in his pockets, waiting for Rimmer to speak up. His question hadn’t incurred a reaction, and on those occasions it was usually better to let Rimmer speak first. Which he did eventually.
Still facing away from the scouser he said “Did you know I was a mistake Lister? “
Lister remained silent, unsure as to how to reply.
“Yes, I was the result of a failed birth control device, one of IOs so-called cutting edge contraceptive treatments”
“Rimmer man..”
“I couldn’t even get my own conception right could I Lister! And they never let me forget it, I was made to feel like a burden throughout the whole of my childhood. It’s not that I didn’t try to meet their expectations, I wore myself out doing it, but i just wasn’t good enough.”
“Rimmer man don’t take any notice of Cat.”
Rimmer cut him off again, this time raising his voice.
“But he was right though wasn’t he! My brothers were all they ever wanted! Three sons! Three perfect boys! Their wonderful family was complete! And then I came along and ruined everything! Because that’s what I do Lister isn’t it!? I ruin everything!!”
At this he suddenly charged at Lister, pinning him against the wall with his hands on his wrists.
“Why wasn’t I good enough Lister? Why was I never good enough!” The power began fluctuating again, and Rimmer’s projection began to flare brighter.
A frightening thought flashed through Listers mind
“Why the smeg did I agree to come in here by myself without backup? Is he actually gonna kill me this time?”
He struggled against the holograms grip, even though he knew how futile it was. He seriously considered calling Kryten in. The mechanoid had some degree of strength, he really didn’t think it matched Rimmers though. He was still struggling to push Rimmer away, when he noticed holagrammatic tears forming in the taller man’s eyes.
Completely incapable of overpowering him physically, Lister attempted something else instead. He looked Rimmer square in the eye and said in the most comforting voice he could muster up.
“It’s ok Rimmer...Look at me..LOOK at me!”
Hazel reluctantly met the dark chocolate gaze, and something in his expression changed. He eased off some of the pressure he had on Lister’s wrists, not enough for Lister to get free, but at least the pain in his wrists began to subside.
“It’s ok to hurt Rimmer, it’s perfectly ok, everybody feels pain now and again, you don’t have to bottle it up. I’m here for you man, I always have been.”
Rimmer seemed to see something in Listers eyes, and in an instant, he removed his hands from Listers wrists and pulled him into a hug.
The shock of it hit Lister like a wave! Rimmer hugging him? He could feel the hologram trembling with what could only have been a mixture of rage and upset.
“Rimmer man ease up a little, you’re hurting my back”
Rimmer relinquished his grip slightly and Lister found himself relaxing into the hug. It was quite a nice hug he found himself thinking. Rimmer was soft and warm. It was comforting to be held in such a tight embrace. But this was Rimmer? Smeghead Rimmer? He should be finding this repulsive, but he felt as if he could have stayed in that embrace forever. It had been a long time since he’d had any form of physical contact that’s all it was, nothing more...or was it?
He didn’t have time for any more considerations, as Rimmer abruptly pulled back from him, he looked dazed as if he had just woken up in this very position. The hologram surveyed the damage in the room, took a quick look back at Lister, and then promptly disappeared into his light bee. Lister could only stand there dumbfounded as the metal device hit the floor with a solid clonk.