Work Text:
“If I could turn back time and start over, I would. Believe me.”
“I will eat you.”
The creature giggled, their tiny tail curling over a round tummy.
“I will.”
Tiny hands grabbed the tiny tail, and pulled the tip into their tiny mouth, where tiny sharp teeth delightedly chewed and gnawed, while the eyelashes, attached to rather large and round eyes, fluttered.
“I’m going squish you, yes I am.” Julian cooed and tickled one tiny foot, which had several distressingly tiny toes, “I will squish you, I will bake you into a tiny little pie and eat you.“
Garak observed the scene from the kitchen with mild horror.
“If they have recurring nightmares of being cooked alive later in life, we’ll know who to blame.” He said, parsley abandoned mid mince to safely express his distress. Julian hummed, barely listening and booped a tiny nose.
“They’re so small.”
“Quite a common quality in babies.”
“I can't stand it.”
“Yes, I had noticed.”
“Human babies are not this small.”
“I thought you knew that before we got a Cardassian one.”
“Of course I did, but cooing at other people’s babies is unprofessional.”
“So you’ll compensate by cooing our child to death.”
“Elim! Don't say things like that, they can hear you!”
Garak rolled his eyes back to the parsley and minced away, still listening in to the nonsense occurring in the living room.
“And if I could turn back time and start over, I would. Believe me. You do, don't you? Yes you do, you know I’d squish you again,” Julian squished the tiny, chubby cheeks, “baaaake you,” He rolled them gently from side to side, a bit like dough, “Aaand eat you! Mwahmwahmwah!” Their poor baby squealed and giggled under Julian’s brizzly kisses, the horribly tiny tail whacking against his cheek, tiny little hands pulling at the beard.
“Dinner is almost ready,” Garak pointed the knife at their child, then the pot, ”Just add our infant child in the mix and we’re all set.”