Chapter Text
Rafael paced the width of the interrogation room as Benson and Carisi grilled their suspect. They were going on hour two now and he still hadn't given anything up.
"Can you tell me where you were last Thursday night, Mr. Loring?" Benson pressed.
Rafael continued his pacing, keeping only half his attention on the interrogation. Thank goodness it was Friday, so maybe he wouldn't have to take too much work home with him tonight. He could order some Indian food, pour some wine, and put on some music. It would be a nice end to an exhausting week.
"I said, can you tell me where you were last Thursday, Mr. Loring?" Benson's voice was verging on irritated now.
"I'm sorry?"
The sergeant let out an exasperated sigh. "This interview seems to be boring you, Mr. Loring. Is there something more interesting that's distracting you?"
"Yes actually, your ADA's fine ass."
Rafael swiveled so that his backside was facing the wall now, away from their suspect.
Loring chuckled, obviously taking some delight in his discomfort. "Don't act so shocked, Mr. Barba. Come now, don't try to tell me that you've never bent over for a man before."
Rafael's mouth moved before he could stop himself. "Just because I have doesn't mean I would ever want to for a piece of scum like you."
Loring was on his feet now, eyes blazing. "Don't you dare disrespect me like that!"
In a flash, Carisi sprang up to place himself between Rafael and the incensed suspect. Loring's attorney tugged on his client's shoulder, urging him to stand down.
"Look, if you don't have enough to hold my client, then this meeting is over. We've given you more than enough of our time even though he's under no obligation to be here. We're done for today."
As Loring walked past Rafael, he turned to stare at him directly. "I would watch myself if I were you, Mr. Barba."
And so it was that several minutes later Rafael found himself in a heated argument with Benson.
"I don't need a babysitter."
"Barba, we're talking about a protective detail for your own safety." Benson crossed her arms, holding firm. "A suspect just made a threat against you. We have to take precautions."
Rafael scowled. "He just told me to watch myself. I hardly think that necessitates all this bother." If only Liv knew about the drawerful of scrawled threats he'd received thus far during his tenure as a prosecutor. . . . but now was probably not the time to bring those up.
"Well I still think it's credible. Look Barba, I'm hopeful we'll have enough evidence to charge this guy within the next few days, and then you'll get your freedom back. And in future, you might want to refrain from unnecessarily antagonizing suspects."
"Oh, so he objectified me and now it's my fault that I talked back?"
"That's not what I'm saying Barba. I just don't want to see you making yourself a target."
"Well I still don't see why I need protection."
"You gotta take this more seriously, Counselor," Carisi chimed in, perching on the edge of the interrogation room table. "We like Loring for multiple rapes and murders, so threats from him are no joke."
"You're exactly right, Carisi," Benson agreed. "And that's why it's fitting that you will be the one watching Barba tonight."
Carisi's eyes widened. "Sarg, I can't do it tonight. It's my sister's birthday and my family's having a big dinner for her."
"Well I don't have childcare for Noah, Rollins is on vacation, and Amaro and Fin both have the flu. So I'm sorry Carisi, but it has to be you."
"Oh joy," Rafael muttered. There went his Friday night.
Carisi pouted. "So instead of my family celebration I have to put up with Barba's whining?"
"Are you refusing this assignment, Carisi?" Benson asked, voice going dangerously low.
"Of course not, Sarg. It's just, we're trying to do our best to protect Barba and he can't even be grateful about it, he has to complain about everything."
Rafael scoffed. "Well excuse me, I didn't realize that I should be grateful to have Boy Detective here foisted on me tonight, when all I wanted was to relax in peace."
Liv held up her hands to shush them. "Cool it, both of you. Carisi, you're going to be Barba's protective detail for tonight, and that's that. Barba, listen to what Carisi says, hard as that may be for you. You two can work out the rest of the details amongst yourselves."
And with that Benson left the interrogation room, leaving Rafael and Carisi to stare at each other in stony silence.
"I'll walk you over to your office, and then I'm going to run home to pack an overnight bag," Carisi said finally. "I'll stop by your office again at seven to pick you up."
"I usually work later than that."
Carisi shrugged. "Well that's how late you'll be working tonight. The daytime security at your building leaves at seven; you'll be more vulnerable after that with just the night crew."
"So that's it then, I don't get a say in it?" Rafael knew he was being unreasonable, and knew that Carisi was just doing his job, but dammit if the detective's attitude wasn't rubbing him the wrong way.
"No. Liv said you have to listen to me, remember? So be ready at seven."
Maybe it wasn't entirely due to forgetfulness that Rafael was still engrossed in his work at seven, feet up on his desk as he perused a case file. Maybe there was some intent to flout the detective's orders and put him in his place.
But Carisi didn't say anything about it as Barba leisurely packed up for the day. Instead he paced the perimeter of the office and inspected all the exits.
"Carisi, I highly doubt that Loring is hiding out in my office."
"That may be, Counselor, but like my mom always says, it's better to be safe than sorry."
"Lots of people say that, Carisi. So I don't think your mom can really lay claim to the saying."
During the walk to Carisi's car, they clashed over what type of takeout to pick up. Carisi argued that since he was missing his family's dinner, he should get to decide. Rafael countered that food selection should be in his purview because they were going to be dining at his place.
In the end they compromised on Thai. Which Rafael couldn't help starting to pick at while waiting for Carisi to make an agonizingly thorough safety check of his apartment.
He also pulled some work papers out from his briefcase and arrayed them next to his plate. This should, fingers crossed, ward off any small talk. It felt like an uncomfortable intrusion, having someone else dining at his table when it had been so long.
Carisi seemed to take the hint. The normally verbose detective began to flip through one of Rafael's law journals as he ate, rather than try to engage him.
Rafael still didn't know quite what to make of SVU's newest detective. At first he had feared that Carisi would be another Amaro, whose machismo always made him feel on guard.
But any bravado that Carisi possessed seemed to stem instead from an unhindered directness.
After dinner Rafael retired to his bedroom to change into casual clothes. When he returned he found Carisi lounging on his sofa in a pair of Fordham Law pajamas, flipping channels.
"I'm going to make some coffee, Carisi - would you like some?"
"You're seriously going to have coffee at this hour?"
"Yes. Do you have an issue with that, Detective?"
"Nah, not at all. You do you, Counselor."
"Well what else am I going to do?" Rafael said to himself under his breath as he swung open the refrigerator to get out the milk.
"Dammit!" As he stared inside he remembered throwing out the milk that morning.
"What is it?" Carisi called out as he came running, gun drawn.
"Nothing, I just realized I'm out of milk for my coffee. I'll have to run to the corner store to get some more."
"You really need to stay inside tonight for your protection, Barba."
"Seriously, Carisi?" This was going too far. "Come on, what's going to happen to me if I go outside for five minutes?" Rafael took a step forward, to go around the detective.
Carisi widened his stance, blocking the way. "I'm serious, Counselor. And I will cuff you to this refrigerator to keep you from endangering yourself, if I have to."
Staring up at the detective, Rafael was reminded that this skinny kid was actually quite strong.
Just then, a noise came from outside the door, and the knob began to jiggle.
Carisi instantly moved to position himself facing towards the door, motioning silently for Rafael to stay behind him. Which Rafael did without protest, shamelessly clinging to Carisi's pajama top as he huddled behind the detective.
The door swung open, the identity of the intruder hidden by the paper bags in their arms as they entered the apartment.
"NYPD! Hands in the air where I can see them!" Carisi shouted.
Rafael's mother let out a shriek at the same time as her arms let go of the bags she'd been holding. Clementines began rolling haphazardly across the floor.
"Carisi, it's just my mom, you can put the gun down."
As Carisi lowered his arm, Rafael darted out to calm his mother.
"Mami it's ok, this is Detective Carisi, who works with me. We thought you were an intruder."
"I'm so so sorry Mrs. Barba," Carisi said as he went to check the hallway and then lock the door.
"Mami, let's get you a glass of water." Rafael guided his still-trembling mother into the kitchen. Carisi meanwhile began scrambling after the clementines.
"Mami are you ok? I'm sorry for scaring you. But why didn't you let me know you were coming over?"
"I wanted to surprise you, Rafi," Lucia said while accepting the water. "I didn't expect you to have overnight company," she added with an edge to her voice.
Rafael couldn't help scowling at her reaction, even if it was based on a misinterpretation about the reason there was a pajama-clad detective in his apartment.
"Typical," he muttered, under his breath.
"What was that, Rafi?"
"Nothing, Mami."
"Don't you get passive aggressive with me and then deny it, Rafi,"she scolded while wagging a finger in his face.
"Ok then," Rafael said, hands coming to his hips as he faced off against her. "What's typical is for you to be less than enthused about the idea of my having a male partner. And don't try to deny it, because you know you react differently when it's a woman."
"Rafi, it's fine, I don't have a problem with it. I'm fine with it. I keep telling you that."
"You're fine with it," he repeated. "What a show of enthusiasm."
Lucia threw up her hands in exasperation. "Sometimes I'm not sure what more you want from me, mijo."
"Mami," he sighed, "can we please not rehash this conversation right now while Detective Carisi is here."
Rafael nodded towards the living room, in Carisi's general direction. Only to find that the detective was now standing awkwardly at the kitchen door, clearly having heard more than enough of the conversation.
"Here are your groceries, Mrs. Barba," he said as he placed the bags on the counter.
"Thank you, Detective Carisi. I guess I don't need to stay to help Rafael put these away, as I'm assuming you know where everything goes?"
Carisi shifted nervously.
"Um, Mrs. Barba, I think you may have come to the wrong conclusion about why I'm at your son's apartment."
Shit. Carisi was going to tell his mom about Loring's threat. She was going to flip out. It just couldn't happen, simple as that.
Carisi opened his mouth to speak again. Rafael had the momentary thought of knocking the grocery bags to the floor once more, to create a diversion. Instead, he opened his own mouth.
"He's here because he's my boyfriend." The outburst surprised Rafael almost as much as it seemed to stun Carisi, who just stood there with his mouth in an "o."
"Hmm," Lucia said, as if she were reserving judgment on the whole situation. "And do you have a first name, Detective Carisi?"
"Yes ma'am, it's Dominick, but you can call me Sonny."
"Where are you from, Dominick?"
"Staten Island, ma'am."
Carisi's eyes darted over to Rafael, silently pleading for some sort of explanation or extrication. Rafael responded by avoiding eye contact.
"And how long have you been a detective?"
"Three years, Mrs. Barba, but the first part of it was at other precincts."
"Sonny's in law school as well," Rafael offered, finally deciding that he owed it to Carisi to intervene somewhat in this interrogation.
"Well that's very industrious of you, Detective."
Rafael couldn't decide whether he preferred for his mom to stay longer, subjecting them to more of her questioning, or leave, at which point he would have to answer to Carisi.
His mom made it a moot question. "Well I should get going now, as it's late. I just wanted to drop off these groceries for you, Rafi."
"Thank you Mami."
"I worry that he doesn't take time to care for himself," Lucia added as an explanation to Carisi. "Do you cook, Dominick?"
"I do," Carisi responded with enthusiasm. "My grandma taught me all her recipes."
"Good. Then you make sure that my son eats enough, ok? Or rather, make sure he eats well - I think it's clear he eats enough," she said with a pat to Rafael's belly.
"Mami!"
Rafael noticed Carisi's eyes sliding down to his midsection. God, now the detective was going to think he'd let himself go.
"Ok Mami, let's get you on your way home - like you said, it's getting late." Rafael hurried his mom towards the door before she could embarrass him further.
"Let me walk you down to your car, Mrs. Barba." Carisi slipped on his jacket and surreptitiously slid his gun in the pocket, focused on his job as always.
Rafael busied himself with putting the groceries away. Some five minutes later, Carisi's knock came at the door. "It's Sonny, your boyfriend."
Barba steeled himself to face the music.
"You want to tell what that was about, Barba?" Carisi asked as soon as he was inside. "Or should I say Rafi?"
"You were going to tell her about Loring's threat," Rafael said accusatorially, as if he weren't the one who had the explaining to do.
"And?"
"And she worries too much about me as it is. I can't have her know that a suspect threatened me, especially to the extent that I need armed protection. She wouldn't be able to handle it, and I certainly wouldn't be able to handle her reaction. She would do an even better job than you are of keeping me in this apartment, and she would probably make me quit my job by the end of it."
"So let me get this straight. You'd prefer to tell your mom, who clearly has reservations about you having a relationship with a man, that you are in such a relationship with me, when you're not, rather than tell her that you were threatened by a suspect?"
Rafael tilted his head, considering. "Yes, that pretty much sums it up."
Carisi started smiling. "Rafael Barba is afraid of his mother."
"I am not afraid, I'm just trying to protect her."
"No you're totally afraid of her," Carisi said, actually giggling now.
Rafael couldn't help chuckling himself. "Fine, maybe I am. A little. Are you satisfied?"
"I'll be more satisfied if you give up the idea of making a late-night milk run."
"You're in luck, Carisi, my mom brought me some milk. So there'll be no more escape attempts from your charge tonight. Though I think I'll skip the coffee at this point anyway. I'm ready to turn in."
Rafael brought Carisi some pillows, blankets, and the spare comforter before heading to his room.
Once in bed, his mind turned to every gruesome detail of the murders that they liked Loring for.
With his eyes closed, every sound became heightened. First the creak of a floorboard. Then the howl of the wind against the windows.
But with his eyes open, the shadows loomed in a way they never had before. And Loring lurked in every one.
For ten minutes or so Rafael's fright and his pride battled it out. Finally he swallowed the latter and padded into the living room. Carisi was still awake, curled up in a blanket on the sofa as he looked at something on his phone.
"Hey, what's going on?" the detective asked as he instinctively reached for his gun from the side table. "Everything all right?"
"I'm fine," Rafael reassured him. "Just can't sleep. Loring got in my head," he admitted.
"It's normal to get shaken up, Counselor. He threatened you." Carisi patted the sofa. "Why don't you come sit for awhile."
Rafael only hesitated for a moment before he slid in under the blanket next to Carisi. Even though their bodies weren't touching, he could feel the warmth radiating from the detective.
"My sister sent me some pics from the dinner," Carisi said, leaning over to show Rafael his phone. Rafael looked at the photo of a large family gathered around a table piled with food.
"That looks nice, Carisi. I'm sorry you had to miss the dinner because of me."
"It's fine, there'll be a lot more dinners. And I'm sorry for griping about it earlier, at the precinct."
"You're allowed. I know this wasn't how you expected to be spending your Friday night."
Carisi shrugged. "Maybe, but keeping you safe is more important."
Safe. Rafael liked the sound of that.
The detective went back to scrolling through photos on his phone. Rafael settled in on his side of the sofa, leaning his head back against the cushions. Here, next to Carisi's calm yet alert presence, the wind seemed to soften and the shadows retreated.
Rafael would only close his eyes for a minute or two. Just until he had fully calmed down, and then he would return to bed.
The next thing Rafael was conscious of, however, was his face pressed up against upholstery. As he blinked his eyes open and got his bearings, he realized that he was still on the sofa, sprawled beneath the blanket. Sunlight was streaming in through the living room windows.
He rolled over to find Carisi asleep on the rug next to the sofa, with the fluffy comforter wrapped around himself like a cocoon. Oh God, had the detective spent all night on the floor like that?
As if he could feel Rafael's eyes on him, Carisi began to stir.
"Carisi." Rafael leaned down to prod at him through the comforter.
"Huh?" came the groggy response.
"Carisi, what are you doing on the floor? Why didn't you send me back to bed?"
"You finally looked peaceful once you fell asleep. I didn't want to wake you up."
"But Carisi, the floor must've been murder on your back."
Carisi eased himself up into a sitting position.
"Look Barba, I'm here to protect you, not to have a sleepover. Sometimes the job calls for discomfort. Take stake-outs, for example. You're sitting in the car for hours, and it's always fucking freezing, and after an hour or two you've gotta pee. That's the worst, when you gotta pee."
"Carisi." Rafael held out a hand to stop him. "Can you please refrain from going on about urination like that first thing in the morning?" He scrambled off the sofa and made a beeline for the bathroom.
By the time Rafael returned to the living room, Carisi had migrated to the sofa. He was still ensconced in the comforter, with just his face peeking out.
"Hey Barba," he called out drowsily, "are you gonna cook breakfast for me now?"
"What happened to all that stuff about how the job calls for discomfort, Detective? Now all of a sudden you're expecting breakfast in bed?"
"Breakfast on the couch," Carisi corrected. "See, I've been thinking about it. Since it turns out I'm your boyfriend, social custom dictates that you cook breakfast for me after I spend the night."
"I think that expectation only attaches if you put out," Rafael replied mildly.
"I'm not that easy," Carisi huffed before pulling the comforter fully over his head.
Leaving the detective to his hard-earned rest, Rafael headed to the kitchen to put on some coffee. In the fridge, he found a carton of eggs with a passable date, and in the freezer, some sliced bread and bacon.
Carisi appeared in the kitchen once the bacon was sizzling. His hair was unexpectedly curly in the morning, the normally slicked-back locks tumbling into his face.
"Barba, you know I was joking about you making me breakfast, right? You really didn't have to."
"It's the least I can do after causing you to sleep on the floor all night. Here, why don't you put yourself to use by making the toast."
Carisi wordlessly slid past him in the narrow galley kitchen and started placing the frozen bread in the toaster with a surprising familiarity, as if helping Rafael make breakfast were something he did every weekend.
Rafael placed the food onto serving plates, and Carisi helped him carry everything out to the small dining table.
"This is actually good, Barba," the detective commented between mouthfuls.
"Actually good? Were you expecting otherwise?"
Carisi reddened slightly. "I didn't mean that I expected it to be bad. You just don't really seem like the cooking type is all."
"Hmm," Rafael mused while sipping his coffee, "as my fake boyfriend I think you're supposed to be more complimentary than that."
"I'll work on it."
Rafael looked over at his work papers, stacked to his right. If he started reading through them, he could once again avoid conversing.
Instead he turned back to Carisi. "So tell me about everyone who was at that dinner you were supposed to go to last night."
Carisi launched into a discussion of his immediate and extended family members. Rafael found himself laughing at the caricatures that the detective painted. Yet he could tell that Carisi really cared about each and every one of them.
Rafael reached for another piece of bacon, then on second thought put it back onto the serving plate.
"That's ok Barba you can take it, I've had enough," Carisi said, pushing the plate towards him.
"No it's not that, I just think I should cut back. You heard what my mom said last night and, well, she's right."
"Right about what?" Carisi cocked his head like a confused puppy.
"That I'm losing my figure."
"Counselor, there's nothing wrong with your figure. It's very nice just the way it is."
Rafael started chuckling. "You have to say that since you're my 'boyfriend,' " he said, using air quotes. "Now you've gotten the hang of giving compliments."
"Oh, um, yeah, exactly, that's how I meant it," Carisi replied. "Just trying to be a model fake boyfriend and all."
Carisi's phone pinged on the table. "Good news. Liv says that the forensics came back, and Loring is a match. She just sent some unis to pick him up."
Rafael's shoulders sagged in relief. He hadn't even realized that he'd been tensing them.
"I guess that means I can get out of your hair then, and let you enjoy your weekend," Carisi continued.
"Yeah, I guess so," Rafael replied, trying to summon his enthusiasm. This was what he wanted, wasn't it, to have his weekend back to himself?
"I think this marks our break up then, fake boyfriend."
"Yes, well, all good things must come to an end."
"I will always cherish these twelve hours we had together," Carisi said with a straight face, hand on heart, his dancing eyes the only thing giving away his amusement.
"God you're a sap. No wonder we broke up."
"You know you're gonna want me back, Counselor."
"We'll see about that, Detective."