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Steve both hated and loved the fact that their crappy, poorly insulated apartment’s heater gave out at least twice a month, four times it seemed in the winter months. It was a known fact that Steve couldn’t keep warm during these times, at least not fully on his own. Before he and Bucky moved in together he wondered how he had ever managed it all on his own without him. Now was one of those times where he wished Bucky was home because he knew his friend would fuss over him and he wouldn’t have to worry about the fridged state he was in at the moment.
Steve had come home from the bookstore he was currently working at to find the apartment cold as ice. It didn’t help that he was fighting a cold, a bad one, he was still coughing, the wheeze in his chest becoming more bothersome. But he’d already been to the doctor, twice, and the meds plus his asthma medication were all he could rely on. More than he wished to rely on that was. They said what they always said, ‘wait it out and keep an eye out for harsher symptoms’. It also added to the problem that his shoes were soaked from the brief time they had where it had gotten above freezing, just enough to melt the snow that had already accumulated. Which was a slushy gross mess on every street corner. He would have taken a cab but money was tight as it was, so he braved the ten block walk home and hoped that Bucky wouldn’t be too mothering when he got there.
He pulled his itchy wool coat around his shoulders, the bristly fabric irritating his neck, never thinking for a second to take it off, not now especially given the fact that the heat was out. Without either of them at the apartment there was no stove or fireplace lit so it was just that, dead cold. He pulled out the watch from his pocket and found that it wasn’t even 4. Bucky wouldn’t be home for probably another hour or so. To make matters worse he could hear the wind utterly howling outside their windows, rattling them in a way that didn’t instill any kind of comfort, but ensured Steve that it was going to be a tiring afternoon.
He hated being small. He hated it with every fiber of his being, it meant he couldn’t fight without being pummeled, it meant being shorter than every guy or girl in the room, or at least it felt like it. His chest felt too small, hollow, weak. It was times like this that he felt as though mother-nature was reminding him that he was just that, small.
The only time he didn’t despise it was when Bucky was here.
He settled onto the ratty couch, one of the cotton throws were still there, a knitted blanket that he regrettably took to bed every night. Something his Mom had made him when he was little and it was no secret between him and Bucky that it was everything that was important when he was feeling under the weather. It was warmth, comfort, his mom, in one fell swoop. He wrapped it around his shoulders with a wet snuffle, damn this cold, it wouldn’t let him be, nor would the cold around him.
The apartment rattled and he heard a loud truck rumble just outside, they were in for a blizzard if the sky was anything to report. He hoped this cold didn’t turn into anything other than just that, a cold, if it turned into pneumonia he was in for a long road of coughing, vomiting, meds, and staying in bed, missing work.
He curled further into the blankets, willing the buzz of the heater to come back on but he’d already done as much as he knew how and that was giving it a good bang. The landlord was bad about keeping things up to date, that was no surprise, even now with an impending blizzard on the horizon.
He was dozing off, teeth chattering despite everything he tried, the very action making him sleepy, when he heard the front door open and Bucky’s loud voice filling the space, “Goddamn snow, Stevie, you here?”
Steve was still so cold, but still clutching the thick blanket his mom made him, he turned his head and exhaled loudly, “In here…”
“Heater is out fucking again? Are you kidding me?” Bucky crossed the space between him, removing his jacket and tossing it aside, “Baby-doll, you cold?” he quickly answered his own question as he always did whenever this happened, “Of course you’re cold, Jesus, I’m stupid I can hear your chattering from the doorway.”
Steve expected Bucky to immediately to move to his side but he heard him locking the door and moving into the kitchen, “Let’s hope the water pump is working, huh?”
He was fighting off the want to doze when he heard the pipes cracking and popping with the expanse of heat between the pipes. When he heard ‘baby’ close to his ear he jumped and nearly headbutted Bucky in the chin, “Jesus Buck!”
“Well, honey, you were damn near asleep,” he could feel Bucky’s grin against the flesh of his throat, “Look at you, you didn’t even get out of your work clothes. You haven’t eaten either have you?”
Steve shook his head with a frown, only realizing just now how lethargic he was and hungry too, “Kinda just laid here when I got home, kinda almost went to sleep s’cold in here.”
He felt the weight of the couch give way with a comfortable dip as Bucky crowded into his space, strong arms went around his torso, latched to his waist and warm, plump lips were pressed to his cheek, “Kinda?” he chuckled mimicking his tone only slightly, “Of course you did, you should’ve gotten in the tub, at least get your feet in some hot water or something. Look at you” he continued with a smile, “You knew I’d be home soon. Get you cleaned up, fed, and then into bed. I’ll keep you warm we can listen to the radio.” As Bucky was saying this he was undressing Steve, pulling his shirt above his head, first his sweater, then his t-shirt, and started removing his sneakers and pants.
“Buck, come on, I’m not a stupid kid,” Steve tried his best to growl but it only made his teeth chatter louder, which in turn made Bucky laugh in triumph. To say he squawked was an understatement when Bucky lifted him up into his arms with ease. He gave Bucky’s shoulders a firm slap, “How many times…” he started and Bucky only bounced him up in the air a couple inches that only forced him to have to hold on tight, “Bucky!”
Bucky kissed him softly, swallowing up any more words of protest and Steve allowed him this much. It didn’t hurt that Bucky was a hell of a kisser and he usually used these skills to get what he wanted, now was one of those times.
“You’re such a jerk,” Steve groused as Bucky carried him into the bathroom, his shivering had only intensified as they crossed the cold expanse of the small apartment.
“Yeah but I’m your jerk,” Bucky winked, ridding him of the remaining clothing and lowering him into the blessedly hot water.
“Yeah, well,” was all Steve could manage, his cheeks were red, didn’t seem to matter how many times Bucky saw him naked. However, his teeth didn’t feel like wood so much anymore as he sank deeper into the water. Bucky bent and kissed him on the forehead and then the lips, Steve tilted his head to completely indulge.
“That’s what I thought, stay put and I’ll get the fireplace going and then the stove, it’s gonna be a long one I’m afraid and that wind out there sound like more than just a noisy gale, huh?” he had already left the bathroom to do as he said he was going to do, but it was a small enough space the distance didn’t keep Steve from hearing him. “I’ll be back in two shakes, gonna give a holler to our idiot landlord.”
“Okay Buck.” Steve closed his eyes with a loud breath huffing from his mouth, it was in these moments that he didn’t mind being catered to. Cause it would have been crazy uncomfortable getting undressed and then running the water and so on. Here he could just let Bucky baby him and selfishly stay warm. He’d never say that out loud, hell no, he’d never hear the end of it. He sunk a little deeper to wet his hair, letting the water fill his ears with comforting pops. It almost had the strength to drown out the loud howling just outside their apartment and make him forget about what season it was.
The muffled voice broke the silence. “You plan on pruning up in here?” Bucky laughed softly just enough that alerted his presence but didn’t startle his lulling state.
“No,” Steve smiled, “Just pruny enough. I don’t wanna get out though that’ll defeat the whole purpose of getting warm.”
“I got the pullout all ready for us to go, even got all the extra blankets. If our super keeps up with his reputation,” he reached into the hot water, squeezing Steve’s calve to move, and took the plug out of the tub, “we can bet that won’t be fixed until the morning. We’re gonna need the stove AND the fireplace. He wasn’t in the office. I left a note but you know how well that usually works. Hallways are even worse.”
“When you put it that way I really don’t wanna get out,” Steve growled, even as Bucky wrapped a towel over his shoulders as the hot water dwindled. He felt like he was moving in slow motion even with Bucky’s help, in his eyes that warm bed was a million miles away.
“That cough still buggin’ you?” Bucky asked, rubbing the towel in a way that made his blonde hair stick in every direction possible as Steve attempted to pull an over-sized worn sweater up and over his head. As fast as possible he hurried his arms into the sleeves.
Steve shrugged, “A little bit, nothin’ to worry about okay? I’d tell ya if it was, believe me I don’t wanna be going back to the doctor.” Just the thought of one of those tree-trunk needles made him shudder head to toe.
Bucky slipped both arms around Steve’s slim waist, giving him a little twirl as he did so, which only forced Steve to rest his own arms around Bucky’s broad shoulders, “Worries me.” he whispered, nuzzling Steve’s cheek.
Steve sighed, the exhaustion of the work day catching up like a slap, “I know it does, I’m sorry.”
“Nothin’ to apologize about sweetheart,” Bucky kissed him again, “Just hate this weather makes worrying a lot easier to do, am I right?”
They swayed back and forth and with a nod Steve held tighter, having to stand up on his tiptoes to properly do so, “You put the record player on?”
“Sure did,” Bucky murmured against the heated shell of his ear, “Come on,” he tapped his fingers on the back of Steve’s thighs. He didn’t even think about it twice, just did a little jump and wrapped around Bucky like an octopus. It made Bucky laugh, but the other man easily held him up securely, looping his hands at the bends of his knees and carrying him into the living room.
The room was already beginning to slowly but surely radiate warmth and the subtle golden glow of the fireplace was enough to make his eyes start drooping all over again. Bucky backed them up onto the sofa couch, sitting down with a prominent bounce on the shitty mattress. A mattress he knew in the long run they’d regret settling on, if it weren’t one spring into their back it would be another.
“You’re gonna be sleeping better than me, that’s for damn sure. I think lying on top of me will be a hell of a lot more comfortable than this thing.” Bucky chuckled, giving Steve a playful shove until he got the message and crawled up and under the blankets.
Steve only smiled, “It’s either that or freeze, you may be some big man but you can still freeze to death.”
Bucky rolled his eyes, throwing a blanket over Steve’s face, which he only grabbed and added it to his layers beneath the quilt. He shoved a pillow up under his head and grinned at Bucky in a way that made the other man laugh again.
“Hope you like cold sandwiches, but let’s face it, you’re eating it whether you like it or not. It’s all we got and you don’t eat enough as it is,” Bucky said, pushing up from the mattress and grabbing the plates he’d set out on the kitchen table. Steve sat up just enough to be able to eat and took the plate from Bucky’s outstretched hand.
“I will, don’t worry, geez,” Steve grumbled, already taking a big bite, not realizing until just how hungry he really he was. Well, served him right for skipping lunch at the bookstore, but he kept his mouth shut about that. His Mom was always a stickler for how much he ate and since she passed Bucky was twice as bad about the subject.
Bucky shuffled close until they were side by side, he wrapped an arm around Steve’s shoulders and pulled him close.
“Did YOU eat enough today?” Steve thought to ask, “I’m gonna say no, and you look tired too.”
“Am tired,” Bucky nodded, shimmying down more comfortably in the cocoon of warmth as he ate with his eyes closed. He had the sandwich down in three bites and setting the plate down sideways to the end table that Steve had to help with.
“That boss of yours pushes you too hard, and on a day like this? I bet he really went all out.” Steve thought about Bucky working the docks in this cold and it made his stomach clench. But there was no arguing with Bucky. He had been insistent that Steve keep taking his art classes and that if it were a few extra hours a week he’d do it with a ‘big fucking smile on his face’ as he had put it.
“Worth it,” Bucky answered predictably, letting his head fall back, one of the only times his hair was ever mussed and it fell endearingly over his brow.
Steve ate as much as he believed would satisfy Bucky, set his plate aside too, “Well then get your hypocritical ass over here.” and he tugged Bucky farther down on the bed before snuggling close to his chest, pulling the blankets up around the both of them. The crackling of the wood stove, and small fireplace was like a lullaby, coupled with the scent of Bucky, earthy and oily, his warmth, and firm arms around him he knew sleep wouldn’t be difficult even despite their no radiator situation.
The lights flickered with each rattle of the walls, from their place on the bed Steve could see the snow beginning to fall is droves. Big fat thick flakes that quickly muddied up the glass of the windows.
The record player stopped, and then the needle returned and played the record again, “Ya know?” Bucky exhaled gently, “I don’t even mind baby-doll, ain’t that bad, gives us the excuse to do this.” Like the cat that Steve usually compared him to he buried his nose in the still damp strands of Steve’s hair.
Steve laughed softly at the affection, he silently agreed, and when the lights went out and the only thing that lit the apartment was the dull light of the apartment, Steve couldn’t think of another time he felt so content. Bucky at his side, sleeping soundly, safe, the room quiet, and he wouldn’t lie, he was more than lucky to have his very own handsome as hell water bottle.