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“Grounders in space, huh?"
"One hell of an oxymoron."
"Well you are an expert on all things moronic, aren't you Blake?"
Bellamy couldn’t help but smile at that, but he covered it up by rolling his eyes and turning away from Raven with a muttered, "Cute."
They were sitting in the main room of the ship, having just finished the last of the rations they packed with them. Bellamy felt a bit like what he imagines an old high school cafeteria would’ve been like, from what he saw in the old movies during his childhood. The type of movies where the catty popular kids ostracized the rest of the school. He, Raven, Monty and Harper sit alone, but Bellamy hoped they didn’t seem as unapproachable as the hormonal highschoolers were made out to be on film. However, there did seem to be an unspoken rule of: you were born on the ground, you can't sit with us .
He could hardly believe that out of all the people on Earth, Echo had to be one of the few people to join them in space. He couldn’t say he didn’t feel a little bit of pity for the girl; especially after seeing what she intended to do rather than take off with the rest of them. Not to mention the fact that now that she’s here, it seemed as though she wanted to pretend she was anywhere but. Her usual post is at the big viewing window, looking at her home longingly despite its doom and gloom. If she wasn’t there, she was wandering the Ring in such a delicate manner, you’d think the whole thing could fall apart with one wrong step. But, even with all of that, Bellamy still couldn’t say he’s very happy being stuck up here with her. Trust is something not easily gained back to begin with and, with all Bellamy knew about Echo, his trust of her was basically nonexistent.
However, at least he does know her on some level. Bellamy couldn’t say as much about the other grounder he was currently orbiting Earth with. During their preparation Murphy was helpful enough, but now that they are safe and sound he seemed to have closed himself off. Even as Bellamy mused about his separation, Murphy was sitting crouched against the wall. Since they arrived, Bellamy had not seen the boy look relaxed once. His body language, always tightly wound and uncomfortable. His eyes, always calculating and cagey. Bellamy had only seen snippets of Murphy’s involvement in the spy-people’s lives, always too busy doing something or other to really analyze the newcomer closely. From what he could gather, the man encountered Jaha in the desert and had since roamed around the Arkadia like a shadow. Murphy was there in Polis when the whole City of Light battle went down, but he was unsure of his role in that. He just remembered seeing his face, haunted and grim. When Bellamy and the others found him last, he had been trying to hitch a ride to try to get to some bunker on the island. When the prospect of space came up, Murphy took them up on the offer; apparently the bunker wouldn’t have actually kept him alive for a very long time. Overall, that wasn’t a lot to go on, and Bellamy feared Murphy will be more harm than good to the group. Part of Bellamy couldn’t help but look at the boy and feel a bit of anger. It could have been Clarke up there with them, instead of this stranger. The rational part of Bellamy knows it wasn’t his fault Clarke was... gone, and it made Bellamy’s stomach turn to feel this way.
He shook his head, willing himself to stop these thoughts before they got out of hand. Besides, maybe the anger and guilt will ease once he actually gets to know the grounder man. Bellamy glanced in Murphy’s direction, but the wall was empty. Murphy already having slunk off to wherever he spends his time. Maybe getting to know him would be harder than it seemed.
Well , he thought, a bitter laugh escaping, I guess I do have five years to work on that.
***
A few weeks later, Bellamy found himself once again sitting with his friends in the main room of the Ring. This time with the added displeasure of trying to stomach Monty’s newly harvested algae. Bellamy thought he remembered being taught that breakfast was the most important meal of the day, but he found it hard to believe that this specific bowl of goop could be deserving of any special importance.
A voice broke the silence, thankfully halting anymore algae related thoughts.
“I was thinking. Maybe if we all took on official jobs, like on the Ark, we would all feel a lot less stressed about everything. It would give us all something to focus on everyday.” Monty, ever the voice of reason pointed out.
“That sounds good. You have your work on the algae farm, which Harper can help with. Raven has her... Raven things.” Bellamy paused deliberating on his next decision, “I can see what I can do about medical. Growing up we couldn’t just take Octavia to the doctors, obviously, so I may know a thing or two. Just don’t expect any miracles”
“Well that’s all great for us, but what about...” Raven cocked her head towards the grounders, not subtle at all.
“Maybe Echo can teach us to fight, or speak Trig! I can ask her.” Harper replied, far too enthusiastic.
”Better you than me.” Bellamy admitted. He was still quite surprised by their budding friendship. Leave it to Harper to bond with anyone.
She scoffed, “I’d take Echo over Mr. Asshole over there.”
Almost anyone.
Though the comment made Bellamy’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion and shock. Even more surprising was the laughter that falls out of Raven.
”What’s wrong with Murphy? Is he giving you trouble?”
While Bellamy had little interaction with Murphy, it had been nothing but respectful and polite.
“Guys a dick Bellamy, where have you been?” Bellamy received an elbow to the rib cage from Harper.
Bellamy sent an incredulous look to Monty.
Who, instead of being the peacemaker Bellamy wanted, put his hands up in resignation. “Even I have to admit he isn’t the most pleasant guy around. I tried talking to him and he completely froze me out.”
“And he calls me bird girl !”
Bellamy shook his head at the other’s attitudes, feeling weirdly protective. “Look. We are stuck up here with the asshole for five years. I am hoping you can all make an effort to keep things peaceful around here,” he gave an especially pointed look at Raven, “I’ll go talk to Murphy to see if he has any way to help out around here. Since you all seem to have written him off already.”
Perhaps he was coming on a little strong in the defense of a guy he had only shared a handful of words with. However, the guilt he feels for wishing it was Clarke, instead of Murphy, who made it through the Praimfaya was still gnawing at his insides. He had decided that the man deserved an honest effort to connect with. Maybe it was coming from the selfish part of Bellamy, just wanting to ease his own guilt, but it was true nonetheless.
With that in mind, Bellamy retreated to the far corner of the room where Murphy had pulled a chair to. Though not without some parting wisdom from Raven. “Don’t say we didn’t warn you!”
Murphy eyed Bellamy as he approached. Being the focus of that stare made Bellamy feel exposed and vulnerable. How someone’s eyes can be that piercing is beyond him.
“Hey, Murphy. The others were just talking about coming up with duties for all of us to do to help out around here. You wouldn’t have any issues with that, would you?”
A look of confusion crossed his face. “Of course not, I would be happy to help you Belomi.”
“Oh. Okay awesome.” Bellamy smiled. Still not quite used to the particular way Murphy says his name. “Any idea of something you would like to do?”
“In the Dead Zone, I scavenged for tech. Would it be useful to search this place?”
“That would be really helpful, actually. Thank you Murphy.”
Murphy smiled at that, cheeks reddening.
How his friends have gotten the conclusion that the man blushing in front of him is an asshole, was beyond that. He couldn’t help but to return to the table with a self satisfied smirk on his face, holding strong even when Raven tried to forcibly smack it off.
***
The following week, Bellamy couldn’t get Murphy off his mind.
He’d been thinking of the grounder man while he inventoried the medical wing.
He couldn’t help but glance over at him when they are sharing a meal in the main room.
When he looks at the vastness of space, he couldn’t help but wonder what Murphy might be thinking of it all and has to resist the urge to ask him.
Bellamy wasn’t not sure how Murphy got under his skin so fast, but it happened. His excuse to simply give the guy a chance, for the sake of peace, was getting thinner and thinner. Bellamy found himself wanting to get to know Murphy, to really know him.
He wanted to know what he looks like when he’s laughing. What he acts like in the early morning, before the weight of the world is fully realized. Bellamy would like to know how he looks—
—on the ground?
He was jolted from his Murphy induced fantasies to find himself face to face with the man. Well, he would’ve been face to face if Murphy wasn’t currently taking up residence of the hallway floor beneath them.
Words tumbled out of his mouth, “Holy shit Murphy, what happened? Why are you on the floor? Are you hurt? Please tell me you aren’t hurt.” He was definitely not ready to put his medical skills to the test, and the anxiety he felt squeezed out of his words without his permission.
Murphy cracked open his eyes, and they widened when he noticed Bellamy. “Belomi! You’re here!”
“Murphy wha- what are you doing on the floor? Here, get up.”
He extended his hand out to Murphy, who accepted it and allowed himself to be pulled up. Bellamy’s brain graciously takes him on a prolonged tour of Murphy’s face, noticing the sharp features that seem at home on his face before he realized he’d been holding his hand for an uncomfortable amount of time.
After Bellamy reluctantly let him go, Murphy leaned back down to pick up the backpack he’d been using to collect scavenged items. Though in a manner that could only be described as a little wobbly. His mind begins to spin at the possibilities of what could be wrong.
Asking him, he supposed, would be a start. “Uh, are you feeling alright, you seem a little off.”
“I feel,” he hiccuped, “fine Belomi. Just drop it.”
Just as Bellamy was about to suggest they go to the medical wing to check things out, a voice called out announcing dinner was served.
As footsteps approached, Murphy roughly pushed Bellamy into a nearby storage closet.
“What the hell Mup—“
He was cut off by a hand covering his mouth.
“Shut. Up. Belomi, they can’t know.”
It’s then, in close proximity that Bellamy was able to diagnose Murphy. A smell, suspiciously similar to that of Bellamy’s preferred Monty Green creations, hit him.
He is still however, left with the mystery as to why he’s stuck in a closet with the drunk grounder man.
He gently reached up to uncover his mouth, holding Murphy’s hand within his own.
“Can you explain to me what we are doing here,” he whispered, playing into the secretive act Murphy seemed to think was necessary.
Murphy let out a shaky breath and words tumbled out of him so fast Bellamy had trouble keeping up, “When I was young, I was very sick a lot. The leader of my village said I was using too much of the healer’s time. My father confronted him about this, and ended up dead. And my mother was already gone by then, so I was to be left to die. I didn’t though, and I was banished. They didn’t want me wasting anymore time in the future. I was thrown out like garbage, for something I couldn't control.”
Before Bellamy could respond Murphy’s hand gripped Bellamy’s tightly and he continued, “But I am fine now, you have to trust me. I don’t know why I feel this way but I can’t go to medical. And the others can’t know. I’ll be fine. It can’t happen again.” His voice broke by the end, tears slipping down his cheeks.
“Murphy just slow down please.” Bellamy reached for the backpack, finding a near empty bottle within. “You drank this right? It’s alcohol Murphy, have you never have it? It makes you feel funny. But you aren’t sick.”
This somehow only made Murphy feel worse. “Great, now you think I’m an idiot.”
“No I don’t! I don’t think you are an idiot. I am sorry for what you had to go through, but I promise you I won’t ever let anything like that happen to you again. I swear. You are one of us now.” Bellamy assured him. “Plus, if you find more bottles, share with the rest of us and I’ll show you how it works.”
Murphy looked at Bellamy through tear filled eyes, giving him a weak smile and murmuring an even weaker okay . Reaching up, Bellamy wiped the stray tears from Murphy’s cheek and left his hand there. Caressing his cheek in what he hoped was a comforting manner. It seemed to be successful as Murphy leaned into the touch.
For what seems like an eternity, they sit like that, not wanting to see the others until Murphy was in a clearer state. Bellamy hadn’t felt a moment so peaceful and perfect in a long, long time.
“I think I’m going to kiss you now, okay?”
Before Bellamy could react, there was a pair of lips upon his own. He felt his brain short circuit and found himself unable to do anything.
Thankfully, his brain finally rebooted, and he returned the kiss with enthusiasm. He could hardly believe this was happening. Maybe this is all just some hallucination and Bellamy was the one who needs a medical wing visit.
The kiss deepened and all Bellamy could taste was the moonshine on Murphy’s breath. He was starting to wonder about the effects of second hand alcohol intake, as his head felt as though it was floating off from his body.
Just as both their hands started getting braver, a voice called out yet again.
“Bellamy! Or even… Murphy... Look I’d say your dinner is getting cold but I don’t know what difference that would make. But get your asses to the table so there’s less that I have to eat!” Raven yelled from down the hall.
They broke the kiss with matching groans and laughter, both feeling lighter than they had in years.
Murphy rises first, and offered his hand to Bellamy. Bellamy was hit with some form of backwards déjà vu, and is amazed at how much has changed in such a short amount of him.
”Come on Belomi, bird girl awaits!”
Bellamy couldn’t help but laugh at that as they made their way to the others. Hands found each other, and Bellamy wasn’t sure what this all meant.
Well , he thought with a light laugh, I guess I do have five years to work on that .