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Lena was fine. She was totally and completely fine. With everything. Especially the thing. The thing that apparently everyone else in the world already knew before she did. That Kara -- her jaw clenched involuntarily-- is Supergirl. Of all the ways the universe could screw with her life, she just had to become friends with the one person who probably hates her family more than anything else in the world. Kara actually wanted to be friends, and stay friends even after getting to know Lena. But she lied for years about who she really was.
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Kara finally told her one night when they were sitting on Lena’s balcony sharing a drink before Kara went home. It came out of nowhere. One second Lena was gazing not-so-innocently at her friend who had shown up to their weekly movie night dressed for comfort in low slung sweatpants and a tight shirt that rode up higher than normal, showing off a fair amount of midriff. And a very distracting midriff it was. Lena mentally slapped herself before turning back into the conversation they were apparently having. The intensity of her thoughts must have shown through her eyes, making Kara pause in her story about some article she was having trouble finishing. The two women held each other’s gaze for longer than probably friendly before Kara blurted out her confession to break the tense silence.
“I’m Supergirl.” Lena jumped slightly at the sudden change of tone.
“I’m sorry?” Lena questioned her friend, trying to determine if Kara was playing at some game.
“You spoke about secrets the other day and you were so brave and honest… I can’t keep this from you any longer. And I know it’s a lot to hear and I know you’ll be upset and it was TOTALLY not fair to keep it from you, I just-- Lena? Are you okay?” Kara raced over to her side as Lena lowered herself to the floor where she stood.
Lena had asked for time and some space, which Kara has dejectedly accepted. Until a hesitant text from Kara three days later about the new brunch place they had had to get reservations 4 weeks in advance for. Lena has simply responded, “Fine.” The brunch was incredibly awkward for two people who normally could finish each other’s sentences. Lena’s responses were cold and clipped and Kara looked like a kicked puppy. But Lena never rejected her outright and Kara took that as a sign to keep trying. So they went back to their semi-weekly lunch breaks even when Lena never seemed to warm back up to her.
Kara finally asked her one day, nearly a month later, “Do you hate me?”
Lena froze where she sat chewing on her salad, fork hovering in the air and eyes trained on the table. “Maybe, sometimes I think I could a little bit.” And she shrugged nonchalantly, no awareness of the major blow Kara’s heart just took. She continued, “But it’s cool. I’m fine with it.” She continued chewing and they left it at that. Lena never told anyone about the multiple glasses of whiskey she had to drink that night to stop crying and finally fall asleep.
Did Lena mention she’s fine?
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The first time she got to see the ‘Superfriends’ as Kara said they were so cleverly calling themselves, was nearly two months after Kara’s confession. Everyone was finally free for game night and Kara was desperately trying to bring the group back to normal after the icy silence from Lena all month.
She had the movie loaded in the TV, board games placed around the table for the group to choose from, chips and salsa at the ready, and enough alcohol to get even herself a little drunk. Kara was prepared for every and any possible scenario. What she was not prepared for was Lena arriving 30 minutes early in the world’s tightest black leather skirt that didn’t quite reach her knees and a half unbuttoned white dress shirt. Kara could only stare as Lena breezed past her and went immediately for the booze. She really tried not to leer as Lena leaned across the counter to grab a glass, but who on Earth would make a skirt that rode up so far with just a simple motion. Kara’s eyes quickly glanced away as Lena turned back to face her, but she was forced to meet the other woman’s eyes when Lena held out a cup with a raised eyebrow.
“Do a shot with me?” Kara was going to remind her that alcohol has no effect on her, but thought better of it since Lena was actually smiling (however slightly) at her. They tapped their cups together and downed their drinks, attempting to make small talk until everyone else arrived.
30 painfully long minutes later, the group was surrounding the table and setting up for the first round of Clue. And a quick glance at Lena showed her pouring the second drink of the night. Already looking a little tipsy, Kara started to hover close by. Just in case. Which of course, Lena noticed, “What, Supergirl? Think I can’t handle my liquor?” She rolled her eyes as she passed Kara, stopping to grab some chips.
Kara sat back down and tried not to watch as Lena found the only available space to Kara’s left. She did however have to catch Lena as she plopped down on the floor, right on top of Kara. Lena let out an undignified squeak as Kara wrapped her hands around Lena’s hips, dangerously close to her bottom, to keep her from falling into Kara’s lap. “Sorry,” they both flushed red and scooted as far apart as they could manage.
The game went on as it was supposed to, Lena of course winning one round using some weird, statistical nonsense that only made sense to billionaire geniuses. Early on during round two, Kara saw Lena lose focus. Somewhere between drink 3 and 4, Lena crawled into her own head and zoned out from the rest of the group. Kara gently took Lena’s hand and asked to speak to her. Lena seemed like she would pull away but after a moment’s hesitation, she slowly got up and let herself be led to Kara’s bedroom.
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Kara shuts the door gently behind them, teeth digging into her bottom lip as she tries to figure out how to approach Lena. Things have never been this hard between them, even when they were strangers. It’s been so difficult to not know how to be close to Lena the past month, and Kara is ashamed to realize she was so focused on her own feelings that she completely overlooked when Lena was going through. “What’s going on? Ever since I told you about me, about Supergirl, we haven’t been the same.” Lena scoffs and crosses her arms and Kara slowly gets closer.
“Like I’ve said before, I’m fine . Everything is great and dandy and full of rainbows!”
“Lena, I can tell you’re hurting. Clearly everything is not okay! I just want to help.”
“Stop caring about me!” Lena hits her fists against Kara’s chest weakly and falls into her tight embrace. They slowly slide down to the floor with Kara leaning against the wall and Lena collapsing into her lap.
“I can’t do that. I love you!”
Lena is straddling Kara’s lap and finally meets her eyes, looking for something in them Kara can’t be sure about. Suddenly Lena grabs her face with the hand that’s not being trapped against Kara and kisses her. Hard. It’s messy and full of teeth and tongue and tastes strongly of whiskey. But it’s also cathartic and Kara is kissing her back, so Lena is throwing all of her emotions that have built up over the years of their friendship into this one messy, amazing kiss. “I still hate you.” She remarks with only a slight slur still in her voice as she pulls away and buries her head into the space between Kara’s neck and shoulder.
“I can live with that,” Kara cradles Lena’s face in her hands and places a kiss on her forehead.