Chapter Text
--Mr Harrington-
-Can-
--Peter Parker to Principal Morita’s office please—
--Peter Parker to-- please—
Peter jumps to his feet before the announcement can end, shoving his books in his bag as the entire class lets out a chorus of “ooohhh’s”. He can practically feel Flash’s smirk and Ned’s worry follow him out.
The thing is, Peter can’t immediately think of what he’s done wrong this time. He’s had no absences since Homecoming, hasn’t accidentally blown anything up in Chemistry lately, even mostly stays awake during class now.
Maybe Principal Morita wants to recognise his hard work? The thought makes Peter swing his backpack higher on his shoulder as he walks down the hall to the office.
When he gets to the office door, however, his good feeling flees, along with the possibility of ever having a good day again.
He pulls the door open cautiously when Principal Morita nods, his hands folded severely on the desk in front of him.
“Hi.” Peter says weakly to his audience.
Mister Stark raises a single eyebrow at Peter from where he’s seated. Peter doesn’t dare look at Aunt May, so he hutches his shoulders and shuffles towards the empty seat between them.
A bobbing figure on the desk catches his eye.
“Oh.” Peter blinks dumbly. “You found Heihei.”
“Yes.” Aunt May hisses. “We found Heihei.”
Peter risks glancing up at her, sees the way her lips are pressed together and eyes narrowed, and immediately drops his eyes back to his lap.
“Care to explain this to us Peter?” Principal Morita prompts.
He sneaks a look at Mister Stark. The billionaire’s looking entirely comfortable in the office, studying at the robot on the desk, the hint of a smirk in the corner of his mouth.
“Seems like you’ve already worked out what he does.” Peter mumbles, kicking his foot at the floor in front of him.
“Peter.” May says in warning.
Peter considers the robot on the desk. It stands on two squat, ungainly legs attached to a scanner, with a pivoting free arm that is currently tapping away at the page, looking just like, well, a chicken pecking at the ground.
“Himymamtchikn.” Peter mumbles into his sweater.
“Peter!” May says again, pointing her finger at him.
Out of the corner of his eye, he sees Mister Stark place a hand in front of his mouth.
“He’s my mathamachicken okay!”
Mister Stark coughs once, then explodes with laughter.
Peter prays for a giant lizard to slither up from the sewers and drag him down to the sweet release of death.
Principal Morita and May look at Mister Stark, completely unimpressed.
“I’m sorry.” He hiccups. “I’m sorry May, Jim. Just give me a second.”
Mister Stark visibly composes himself, then straightens up in his chair.
“Peter.” He attempts to look stern. “Why do you have a – a- why did you build a- Nope, I can’t-” He waves a hand as he dissolves into sniggers again.
“Oh for heavens sake.” May rolls her eyes. “Tony shut up. Peter, do I have to explain why you can’t build a robot to do your calculus homework for you?”
“I think the fact I can build that robot indicates I don’t need to do said homework in the first place!” Peter defends himself. “I had to teach Heihei all those equations myself.”
“Why not just do the homework?” Principal Morita asks.
“Miss Warren prescribes an insane amount of homework, like two chapters a night. It’s really boring, and I don’t have that kind of time.” Peter shoots a pleading look at Mister Stark, beaming telelpathic save me’s at him.
“If this is about Peter’s internship interfering with his school-” Principal Morita says firmly.
“Actually, I think this might be partially my fault, but not for the reasons you think.” Mister Stark eyes Peter thoughtfully. “What are you doing currently Pete? Linear algebra?”
“Differential equations.” Peter replies.
“I’m willing to bet Peter and I covered this entire curriculum earlier in the year. I had to teach him linear differentials before I could teach him partial differentials. I felt it was important he understood the base calculations that goes into the energy modelling software we use at SI. It only took a day or two.”
“Be that as it may,” Principal Morita says, “Peter can’t just opt out of schoolwork he feels it’s beneath him.”
“So test him until he finds something to challenge him, or tests out.” Mister Stark says smoothly.
“Tony.” May says in warning. “We already discussed Peter will not be skipping grades.”
“I’m not saying test him out of everything, May.” Mister Stark slips into the well-worn argument. “Lord knows he needs his home ec and history classes. I’m just talking maths, physics, maybe chemistry.”
Peter blocks out the familiar bickering and looks at Principal Morita, who’s eyes are bouncing between May and Tony. He’d feel some satisfaction at his principal’s shocked disbelief, if it wasn’t so completely humiliating to listen to them argue about him like divorced parents.
Eventually, Principal Morita clears his throat and regains control of the conversation. Peter’s given two weeks of detention, during which he will sit consecutive placement exams for all the maths and sciences classes Midtown offers until he tests out. Mister Stark confiscates Heihei. May grounds him for two weeks.
“You ended up making more work for me.” Peter grumbles as he pets his study buddy goodbye through the window of Mister Stark’s sports car.
Mister Stark flashes him a grin, still chuckling as he revs the engine and speeds off.
“How’d you find me out anyway?” Peter asks as they watch him leave.
“Peter.” May presses a kiss against his forehead. “That chicken can’t graph for shit.”