Chapter Text
It was just past curfew when Shouto knocked on Midoriya’s door. There was no response. He hadn’t expected there to be. After a moment of contemplation, he tested the handle. Surprisingly, it was unlocked. Usually Midoriya was pretty thorough with everything, however it had been a particularly stressful day.
Shouto pushed the door open as quietly as he could. He heard the sounds of running water as he entered. The beating in his chest only seemed to quicken as he approached the bathroom door. Then he heard it; Soft heaves coming from behind the door. He felt his heart drop.
Shouto couldn’t lie; he knew something was up with Midoriya as of late. He seemed more jittery and out of it. He’d been overly stressed ever since his internship but now that it was over he got even worse. It wasn’t until Shouta saw him start sneaking food into his room in the middle of the night that he started to suspect anything weird.
He hadn’t come to this conclusion right away. There’d be no reason to. Midoriya was well built and never showed any signs of insecurity on that part. Shouto knew it wasn’t always about that. He knew Midoriya had control issues, but that didn’t make this any easier to believe.
It was really when he noticed Midoriya going for extra jogs, continuously sneaking food, skipping lunches, disappearing after the ones he did participate in, and appearing more tired and sluggish than usual that Shouto decided it was time to face facts. It’s not like he had any idea what to do. He couldn’t just outright accuse someone of something like that. If he went to the teachers it could cause more trouble than necessary. He didn’t want to scare Midoriya off but he knew this was bad. This was very, very bad.
He, of course, understood that if he went to Aizawa or even All Might (especially All Might) about this they would be more than willing to help. It was just that, in a lot of ways, it seemed premature. He wanted to at least Investigate a bit more and speak with Midoriya about it first. Plus, he hadn't had the best experience with the adults in his life and even after months of the teachers at UA proving they were trustworthy, Shouto still struggled to open up. Even if His teachers had started to feel more like parents than his real ones, that still brought up painful connotations.
Shouta stood staring blankly at the bathroom door. He waited amongst the sound of water and gags. He himself felt sick. After a few more minutes Shouto heard the toilet flush for what seemed like the hundredth time and the sink cut off. He held his breath as the bathroom lock clicked.
Midoriya exited the bathroom slowly. His red eyes fixed to the floor. It only took a few seconds for him to notice Shouto standing right up against the wall. Midoriya’s look was unreadable. If there was shock it was light and momentary. It more read as ‘caught’. Apathetic and determined to deny.
Shouto continued to look at Midoriya in silence. He took in his dull eyes that were ridden with deep purple circles that only seemed to increase as time went on. After a few moments of eye contact Izuku turned away. He held onto the upper sleeve of his sweater tightly. Shouta pushed himself off the wall and crossed his arms.
“I know what your doing, it’s, it’s not okay.” Shouto was painfully unprepared. He was hoping he’d been wrong. Hoping that in his care for his friend he’d made a snap judgment. Midoriya huffed and rolled his eyes. Shouto had never seen him do that.
“It’s just-- it’s just a diet okay?” He looked at him with a small smile. “I’ve keep it to myself.”
“Midoriya, this isn’t…”
“Listen,” Izuku raised a hand to stop Shouto’s words “even if you told everyone, they’d never believe it.” Shouto thought on that for a moment.
“I think your right.” He said softly. He looked towards the open bathroom door. “I, I can’t believe it too.”
“Todoroki-kun… it’s not a big deal, okay?” Shouto turned back to see Midoriya wipe his tear filled eyes. “I’ve got it under control, all those horror stories… they, they don’t really apply here. I take care of myself.” Shouto gaped at him.
“You call this taking care of yourself?” Shouto felt himself heating up. He was worried and Midoriya was playing it off as nothing. “This is dangerous. It doesn’t matter if you’re ‘taking care of yourself’ if you're also doing this.”
“Fine.” Midoriya angrily said as he gestured with both hands. “Yeah it isn’t right, but just, just leave it alone.” Izuku stomped to his bed and sat down.
“Midoriya, I can’t just… not say anything.” Shouto was so lost. What could he do now?
“You can!” Midoriya said sharply. He sighed softly to calm himself. “Like I said, it’s not a big deal in the long run. Everyone is busy. You’ve got your provisional license exam coming up. The teachers are always overworked. This sort of thing... It’s the bottom of the list.”
“It shouldn’t be.” Shouto said quietly.
“Yeah, well…”Midoriya brought a hand to the back of his neck as he looked away for a moment.
“Midoriya, this, do you really have to do this? There other ways to deal with things. Keeping things bottled up it’s just… you can’t.” Shouto walked closer to Midoriya.
“That’s rich coming from you.” Midoriya’s tone was harsh. Shouto didn’t know what to make of it. He sighed and took a deep breath in. “Look, I get it okay. I, I could tell you were on to me for awhile but considering your All Might love child theory, I was hoping you’d come up with some other theory. I guess I was in a haste today.”
“Midoriya—“
“Just, just leave it alone, okay?” Midoriya looked at him with his soft caring eyes. He knew he was being manipulated but it was hard to say no when Midoriya was like this. “Please, just for now. I’ll stop… eventually. But for now let’s agree to disagree, okay?”
“Midoriya,”
“T-Todoroki-kun, please.” Shit
“If it gets worse… I’ll know.” He looked away and hugged his chest tighter. “I’ll know and I won’t hesitate to tell someone.”
Izuku’s face brightened up. He hopped up and ran towards Shouto. Before he could process Midoriya was pulling him into a tight hug.
“You’re the best, Shouto!” Midoriya said softly into shouto’s ear.
Shouto took the moment to take note of Midoriya’s form. He felt thinner. Not that he’d hugged him many times but through sparring and such he’d gotten a good handle on Midoriya’s Physic. This was bad. He was making a bad choice. He couldn’t ignore this… but.
“Okay!” Midoriya pulled back from the hug. “You should go to bed, it's late… I know you don’t like to stay up.” He pushed Shouto towards the door. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning!” Shouto was out the door in seconds, the door pulled closed behind him.
Shouto placed his head against the closed door. He took a few deep breaths to compose himself. He didn’t like this. He didn’t like this at all. He didn’t want to keep Midoriya’s dangerous secret. He didn’t want to watch someone he cared about do this to themselves. He seen enough people in his life be ruined by their own minds. He didn’t want to see it again.
Needless to say, Shouto didn’t sleep that night.
He tossed and turned unable to shake the feeling that he was making a mistake. He wanted desperately to trust his friend but he couldn't deny the aching suspicion that Midoriya had no plans of stopping. If Shouto kept this to himself and Midoriya ended up getting hurt, what would he do then? Would he be able to tell anyone he had known or would he have to hide it? Would Midoriya be mad at him for letting it get so bad? Would he ever forgive himself?
Shouto looked to the clock with a sigh. It was already Four in the morning. This wasn't good; the Provisional classes were getting harder since the exam was approaching. As much as Shouto was worried for his friend, he also didn't want to let this eat him up inside. What good would it do if they were both unstable. Granted, what good did it do for Shouto to know about this if he was too scared to say anything.
Even if his father was trying to be better now, words from the past were plaguing his mind. He was starting to wonder if his father had been right; maybe he really is a spineless coward.