Chapter Text
A Star is Born (1937) Starring Janet Gaynor, Fredric March, and directed by William A. Wellman
Crystal Films and Diamond productions. Where to start? Well…
Diamond productions is the oldest film studio around. At least, you think it is. Anyone else competing for that title has somehow slid under the radar. Started near the turn of the century with some of the newest equipment, the ‘Diamonds’ as the ladies were called very quickly found themselves rising to new heights when it came to recognition. Before you could blink, they had an empire, practically. Constantly making film after film, always with some new starlet, always some dramatic load of crock you’d seen a thousand times. Why the hell were people eating this up!?
Oooh, but then the game changer happened. Little “Pink” came into the picture. The Baby Diamond was nothing if not captivating, and as soon as she could walk and talk, she was in front of that camera. A prodigy, some called her. A darling! A star! But…that always only lasts so long now, doesn’t it? You remember…being young, staring up at the screen in wonder at the film in front of you, watching as Rose sang, and danced, and acted her heart out…
You wanted to do that…
You wanted to be up on that screen, in the pretty dresses, and the bright colors…you wanted it more than you could even begin to say…it…never seemed to matter who else could ever be on that screen because…whenever Rose was there, she was all you could see. She really was…a star.
And you wanted to be a star, too…
So, you started taking singing lessons. You started pouring your time, and energy into learning the dances from different films, seeing them over and over again, and even bringing a writing pad with you into the cinema such that you could write down steps you were having trouble with. You performed them, on crowded streets on Saturday mornings for pocket change from passersby, and for talent shows, and birthdays, the odd vaudeville show that had an act fall through…you put yourself out there. You practiced. You worked!! You got your first set of tap shoes when you were ten, and your first set of pointe slippers when you were twelve. There was no one who could tell you, you weren’t put on this earth to perform and entertain.
Everything you did, you did yourself. You made your own costumes from whatever was around, through you nearly got disowned when you used your mother’s nice drapes for a show outfit. You taught yourself different steps, even made some up, chased after other performers for any scraps of information they could give you…
A prodigy some called you. A darling. A star…!
It was when you were in your later years of high school that…apparently, Rose had had quite enough of Diamond productions. It was all over the headlines. Photos snapped of her as she was leaving the premises, with a tall, thin woman at her side…
“I was a child star,” she said “but I’m not a child anymore! I’ve begged and pleaded with my mothers for years to give me the recognition I deserve as an actress, and they refused. So, I’m charting my own course!” And with that…the Diamond Darling disappeared for a little while. Diamond Productions went all but silent. A long gap occurred, no films were released, not even a breath of a casting call, or table reading…
Until out of nowhere, about a year late, Rose reappeared. Out of the blue, she was stepping off a train with a whole new crew, a new style, a new look, and an announcement.
She would be opening her own studio.
Crystal Films.
Did she know anything about running a company? No. Did she know anything about making films? Not really? But that’s what the year had been for. She’d pulled together a whole host of people who poured off the train with her that day, all ready to take center stage, behind the curtain and in front of it.
Pearl, her most trusted confidant, would be going from a humble position as a secretary to one of directorial and executive duty.
Garnet, she promised, was a fantastic choreographer, specializing in couple’s routines.
Bismuth built some of the most elaborate sets you had ever seen!
Lapis was their make up artist, Amethyst was a former show girl, Peridot was a reel specialist…
And…apparently, her new partner, one Greg ‘Universe’ as he was called. Hand him an instrument, and he could play it. Apparently, she just found him…playing on the street one day, and the rest was history…
…you wanted her to walk down your street, someday…
And the best part? Every single one of them could work backstage, act, sing, and dance. They were the whole package, coming in every shape, and size, ready to step into the lime light.
You must have watched that news reel six or seven times…seeing her step from the train was dazzling, removing her sun hat, and motioning for all of her brand-new friends to step off and pose with her.
“We’re here to change the face of film!” She announced, as camera flashed, and reporters clamored to hear every word. “No more dramas that last forever, no more dull, and dark, we’re representing the modern age, with modern stars! We can do all that Diamonds can do and better. We’re here to prove it, too! We’re holding an open casting call-“
Your heart seized in your chest every time at those words, imagining what could be. You eyes must have been full of stars, seeing their new logo appear on the screen, a bright yellow star, with brilliant gem stones, and a rose, all around it…talk about poking the bear, huh? Well either way, you decided, right then, you couldn’t let this pass you by. You raced home from the cinema, pulled your train case and your trunk from the top shelf in the hall closet, and began packing everything up as quickly as you could.
At the racket, your mother came running up the stairs when she got home from work, still in her hospital fatigues, eyes wide, and concerned. “Oh my stars, you nearly scared me out of my skin!!” She breathed, clutching at her chest. “What’s all this mess!? Planning a trip without me?” She was mostly teasing, but…her eyes held…something behind them. She knew this was coming eventually.
“Mama, Rose is BACK! And she’s having a casting call, and they’re taking everyone! All shapes, all sizes, all colors of the rainbow, and-!” Your mom hushed you as she threw her arms around you, forcing you to halt your mad packing for a minute. It was then that, finally, the emotional weight of what you were doing….sank in. you wrapped your own around her, the house around you silent as the grave. It was…the death of something, certainly…nothing…sad, nothing awful, but…perhaps it was the end of your childhood, with the winds shifting in your favor… either way, you clung to your mother. You held her tight, and she gripped at your blouse with all the love she had, stifling a soft sniffle.
“I…” She let a shuddering breath escape her. “I knew this was coming. I always did. You’re just shinin’ a little too bright for this sky, huh? Well…” She separated from you, and you could see how her eye make up was running just a bit. “Sit tight, let me grab you something…”
“Oh, mama, no, it’s alright! I don’t need anything!” But it was too late, she was getting you what you needed, and that was final. You bit your lips together, and looked around your room, which was starting to become bare…and felt the emotions swelling in your chest. You’d lived here your whole life…you sang into your hair brush in front of your vanity, by the window…and stared at the stars painted on your ceiling when you laid in bed at night… Laying in your bed, listening to your parents yell…which turned into sobbing…which turned into the sounds of a gramophone, somewhere, as they swayed back and forth, back and forth, trying to hold together…
“Ohh…don’t cry on my account, sweetness,” your mother interrupted, holding something in her hands with a fond smile. “Here…it’s not a whole lot, but…it’ll get you where you’re goin’. I’ve been…saving a little bit, here and there, since you turned ten…but I did take some out when you ruined my drapes.” The both of you shared a laugh, yours having a hiccupping hitch to it, you held out your hands, and she pressed it into them, biting her lips together as she left it behind.
…A hundred dollars?
A hundred dollars.
“Mama, no!! No, I’m not-“
“Yes, you are!! How did you think you were gonna get there?!” Your mouth fell open, but no answer came out. You’d have walked there if you had to. Ridden in an animal cart. Hitch hiked, it didn’t matter, you’d have gotten there. “Exactly, you’re taking the train, you’re getting there safe, you had better call me when you do!!” She pulled you down by the sides of your head to kiss your forehead, and then patted your cheek to wipe away your tears. “Now, you finish packin’ up, I’ll call and get that train settled out…alright?”
“…I’ll pay you back, when I get there-!”
“No, the hell you wont! You are going to go, and be up on that screen…and when you’re acceptin’ that award, all I want is for you to say ‘Thank you mama!’ Everything else is up to you, understand?” You fell into her arms again, crying a little louder this time. You just…held on. You loved her so much… “Come on…you don’t have enough time for this…!” She reprimanded you, but there was no edge to her words. “We gotta get you to that train station now, don’t we?”
~~~~
The whistle blew, loud and hard as the last call for passengers rang from the platform. “…I guess that’s me…!” You breathed, as you hugged your mom tight a last time. You scooped up your bags, and went running for the train, waving good bye. “I love you!!”
“I love you too, my little sunshine! Go knock ‘em dead!”
You hurried to your seat, looking out the window to where your mother was on the platform…alone. A flash out doubt entered your mind. She looked…so small, now…you opened the window, and waved to her, as the train started to move, leaning out the window as you picked up steam, and got further and further away. She walked to the edge of the platform, still trying to be as close as she could before you eventually rounded a corner, and she was out of sight, leaving behind only the cool, crisp night air…
…ah, you were crying again…
~~~~
The month that followed your arrival was a whirlwind, and that was being nice about it. You found a cheap hotel, then a cheap apartment, then a little restaurant down the street, open all hours of the night. You called your mom nearly every night, and gushed to her about anything and everything, as the casting call crept closer and closer…
You were in the line for it for hours, with hundreds of other prospective big fish from little ponds, just like you…and you started getting in your own head about it, that was for sure. All of these people were the best of the best where they came from, right? So…what made you different? You really got in your head about it. You must have been slowly crawling to the front of the line for two or three hours, but it certainly didn’t feel like it. Before you knew it, a clipboard was being shoved into your hands, asking for you to fill out your name, birthday, stage name, agent name…you didn’t have an agent…was that going to be a problem? You scribbled something down, but your hands were shaking so bad, you didn’t know if they could even read it. Beneath it was the sheet music for your performance…
You stood outside the dark door that read ‘Audition Room entrance: Crystal Films Casting’, and stared, awe-struck for a few moments, before it opened, and your heart dropped from your chest.
That was Pearl. As in…as in Rose’s closest friend, Pearl!! As in-
“Your form please?”
“Huh?” You very wisely questioned.
“Ah, your form? With yo-“
“Right! Right, right, right, here you go!” Were you speaking too loud? You felt like you were speaking too loud. And you cut her off, that probably wasn’t good. You turned beet red as you slid the form from your piano music and handed it over. She scanned it for a moment, before giving you a sweet smile, and ushering you in. A sweet smile that you weren’t sure was 100 percent genuine.
Fuck.
Like…wow, honestly, what were you expecting? You were brought into a room with a piano, and a small stage. In front of which was a long table, with Garnet, Pearl, Bismuth, and…wow, Rose, herself…! A small note of surprise left your throat as you stared at them all, a bit shocked. Pearl was writing something, but you shuffled your way onto the center stage, heels clicking, and pulling Rose’s attention from her little conversation with Bismuth, for her eyes to fall squarely on you.
You opened your mouth to speak-
“What key?” Pearl asked from where she was writing. You didn’t say anything, which had her stop writing, and look up from the paper. “Sorry, what key?” She asked again, and you jolted. After stumbling through an answer (And you swear she rolled her eyes, but you couldn’t prove that), she passed the sheet down to where Rose sat.
“Oooh, wow…look at all this…” She was saying, shuffling through the sheets. “You dance, you sew, you sing…wow, really a Jack of all Trades huh?”
Your brain was fried.
This angel was speaking to you, your idol for so long was SPEAKING TO YOU-
“Y-yes! Ha, yeah, I sew- I taught myself…” You passed your piano music to where Greg sat at the piano, and he hummed in thought at your selection. It wasn’t good or bad, just a…hum. You didn’t like how that sounded.
“So! What will you be singing for us, then~?” Rose laced her fingers and rested her chin on them as she watched you shuffle back into place. You gave a nervous laugh.
“After you’ve gone, by Marion Harris.” Rose lit up a bit, and glanced to a couple of the other judges for their expressions before turning back to you.
“Whenever you’re ready!”
You turned to Greg, and gave a determined nod, taking a deep breath to steady yourself.
It came out shaky. Great Sign. Awesome Sign.
“Now won’t you listen deary,
While I say,
How can you tell me that you’ve
Gone away?
Don’t say that we must part,
Don’t break my achin’ heart-“
Sure, not the most ‘wow’ factor song, but it was one that you were sure you could do better than anyone else out there. One that you made yours every time you did it. There was no one else who could take it from you. And when you opened your eyes, it seemed as though all of theirs were on you. They all leaned forward to hear you, and you took that as a good sign. The last verse was always your favorite-
“There’ll come a time,
Now don’t forget it,
There’ll come a time when,
You’ll regret it,
Someday, blue and down-hearted,
You’ll long to be with me, right back where you started,
After I’ve gone,
After I’ve gone
Away…”
You listened to Greg play out the rest of the song, and the final chord resound before they politely clapped for you. You bowed appreciatively, before crossing the stage to shake Greg’s hand and retrieve your sheet music.
“Wonderful job, we’ll be in touch!!” Rose announced, as she finished writing her notes on the matter, and Pearl stood to usher in the next perspective auditioner.
You felt like your soul was about to leave your body at those words.
We’ll be in touch? As in… you get the job, in touch!? Or like…call-back in touch…?
~~~~
That was three years ago now…and…while you remembered it fondly, things were not so peachy keen as you thought they were going to be. You loved what you did, sure! And you loved your new home, and your new friends, but…well…
Here you were, at a wake.
You sat off to the side, legs crossed, looking around at all the others in dark clothing, and then back up to the front of the room, where a portrait of Rose was on display.
Greg sat in the front row, Pearl beside him with her head in her hands, Garnet beside her with a hand on Pearl’s back, all hung their heads low…
What would this mean for us now?
And especially Greg…your heart wept for him, as he cradled the little bundle in his arms tighter. Steven, his name was… Steven Quartz Universe…quite the big name for such a little guy…he was in a red onesie, and blanket, fast asleep against his father’s chest, with not a clue as to what was happening. This had all happened so quickly…
Rose couldn’t have been happier to be a mom…Greg couldn’t wait to be a dad! They had been so excited, and then…when the time came, something went…wrong. And it was either Steven, or Rose, and she…she chose Steven. She wanted him here more than anything, even if it meant…she wouldn’t be around to see it. She brought him into the world…just as she was leaving it, and…everything seemed just the tiniest bit…duller, since she left.
You guessed that’s what happened when a star died.
…You only hoped that didn’t mean the night sky went dark.