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- i promise i will remember you.
It was like he woke up from a dream, he suddenly remembered everything. He had been panting in the middle of the night, tears streaming down his face. He sobbed for hours and hours, knowing exactly what he had been forgetting for the past fifteen years. The name he couldn't possibly forget, the name he should never forget. It seemed almost impossible to let it go when he remembered. He had promised he would remember and yet, and yet, he forgot.
- tomioka-san, even if you don't remember, i will remember you.
- kochou...
- so don't worry.
And since that day, Giyuu had been searching. He had been searching for the person that slipped away in his past life. But he never met her. And he prayed she was a part of his life, that somehow she didn't miss him or somehow he didn't miss her by a generation or something. The fear grew in his heart, the fear that perhaps he would never meet her ever again. That fear almost engulfed him, dragging him into a deeper abyss.
"Giyuu, to your left!"
He snapped back into reality. Right. He was doing kendo, he almost forgot. In a split-second, he regained his posture and was able to block the blow to his left without flinching. There was the echo of swords clashing against swords and Giyuu could almost see his past life being overlaid with the present.
- to your left, tomioka-san.
"Good job," the coach smiled. "Alright, that's enough practice for today."
Giyuu looked at the wooden sword in his hand, feeling the familiar grip. It had been two years since he first remembered and since then he had never stopped searching. Maybe now it was time to let it go. He had searched every person in the country - at least he tried to. If he was destined to meet her, he would. If he wasn't, he never could even if he wanted to do. He would just let things be the way it is.
Except he would be drowned by too much sorrow.
He didn't think he'd be able to live remembering without seeing her.
"Giyuu?"
"Tomioka!"
Right, he remembered. He had a life to live. He collected his gear and headed for the lockers. He was still an expressionless person, an emotionless person. So wordlessly and soundlessly, he changed into his usual jeans and shirt, along with a flannel jacket. It was green and yellow. He laughed a little, not even realizing it was the color of his mismatched haori until he had it on. The memories of his past life was haunting him a lot more than usual recently.
"Did Tomioka just laugh?" someone said and the locker room became quiet.
Giyuu took on a tranquil, cold visage as he glanced at everyone else. He nodded, a sign that he was going to leave, and then soundlessly left the locker room, grabbing his bag and swinging onto his one shoulder. He walked out of the gym, checking the time as he walked. There was a text message saying that practice times were changing and that they were going to pick a player for the national contest.
- do you think you'll recognize me? what if i look different in my next life?
Giyuu was sure he could. He was very, very positive that he would recognize Shinobu no matter what she looked like or what she was. Even if she was a cat, he would recognize her. He was just waiting for her to come into his life. He was waiting and he thought he could wait until the rest of his life. Even if he only got to see her for a minute, he would be willing to wait sixty years to see her. He could do that for her. He would do that for her.
- yes.
- hmm, me too. even if you're a rock, i will recognize you, tomioka-san.
He was already half-way to home when he realized he left his wallet at the locker room. After a quick debate of wondering if the gym would be open or not, he turned around and headed back to the gym. It didn't take that long for him to get there. He opened the door and there was still some of his teammates practicing. There was the clash of wood against wood, some short-lived shouts and all. After rummaging through his locker, Giyuu realized it wasn't there.
"Have you seen my wallet?" he asked his teammate, who had been sitting on the bench.
"Oh, coach took it because it was too dangerous to leave it for the weekend," was the answer. "He'll give it to you on Monday."
Giyuu nodded. He glanced at the gym, where a new team was practicing on the other half of it. They were girls, probably around his age. He stood there, a little mesmerized, wondering if Shinobu was doing kendo as well. He started it because he wanted to remember more of his past life, he wanted to regain it. He wanted to remember as much as possible, treasure as much as possible.
Because that was the least he could do.
"They're pretty, right?"
"......"
"Do you think coach can make a friendly game with them?"
"......"
"You're so boring, Tomioka."
Without another word, Giyuu headed back, walking on the side as he headed for the exit. Some people stared at him a little and he tried his best to avoid eye contact in the most polite way possible. He could hear their conversations, murmuring and questioning who he could possibly be, that they haven't seen him. Of course. He never stayed for extra practice, he never got to see the team that stayed after him.
- tomioka-san!
"Do you think Shinobu-chan will be late today?"
Giyuu froze hearing that name. He turned around slowly, his eyes slightly widened, his fingers slightly trembling. He had found numerous people who had the name Kochou or Shinobu. He shouldn't be very surprised about another person, right? But he couldn't help but feel a little hopeful, feel a little wistful. He realized the girl who had cried out the name Shinobu was blankly staring at the exit and looked away with a shrug.
With a sharp inhale, Giyuu forced himself to leave the gym, back out on the sunlight. He turned to the left, the direction of his home. There was a thousand thoughts racing through his head. It was as if destiny purposefully wanted to torture him, pushing and forcing him to remember her every single second - as if he could ever forget it. It was pretty much carved into his heart, he could never undo what had been done, no matter how painful.
There was a soft gasp behind him.
His heart started beating ridiculously fast. He got worried he might die from it. He slowly craned his neck, his eyes turning a little glassy. There, standing in the sun, light spilling behind, was a girl. A girl with purple eyes, dark hair that were tainted purple at the edges. There was a butterfly hair pin in her hair. Giyuu felt his grip on his bag loosen as it slipped away from his shoulder, landing on the ground with a soft thud.
It was unmistakably Kochou Shinobu.
Her expression told him everything. She had been waiting, she had been searching tirelessly, he knew it. Her mouth parted a little, her pose was frozen in the midst of walking. Her eyes started to slowly fill up with tears. Giyuu was frozen, he could feel the world turn cold. While he could hear his heart pumping vigorously, the tips of his fingers were so cold, so so cold. And when he thought he needed to do something, she moved first.
"Tomioka-san?"
Like a spell broken, Giyuu felt tears streaming down his face. It was unusual, it was odd, it was unheard of. Without even thinking, he took a step forward and wrapped his arms around her shoulders, bringing her into a warm, tight embrace. He buried his face at her shoulders, inhaling her scent, inhaling her. The familiarity struck him and he could swear he might die from his heart beating so fast.
"Kochou," he breathed down her cheeks, lifting his face to see hers. Slaty, hot tears were trickling down her rosy cheeks. She looked the same, god, thank god she looked the same. She placed one hand on his chest and one hand on his cheeks as his hand fell to her waist. He didn't care who was watching, nothing mattered in the world anymore. He finally found her.
"God, you look... the same," Shinobu whispered, gasping a little. "Tomioka-san, I can't believe..." Her voice trailed away and she burst into more tears. "I'm so glad, I'm so happy. I thought, I thought I couldn't ever see you again." She placed her hand behind his neck, pulling him closer. Their foreheads touched, warm and alive. "Thank you, thank you, thank you."
"Kochou," Giyuu breathed. "You... you remembered me."
"Of course," Shinobu giggled through her tears. "How can I ever forget... you?"
"I love you," he blurted. The sentence he had been practicing again and again. He wasn't going to waste another life time without her. "I love you, Shinobu." He watched as her face turned pink at first and then red. She took a sharp inhale, her eyes still brimmed with tears. Then after a moment, she laughed again, a genuine, sincere smile surfacing on her face. It was the real kind of smile, not the one she put on to reassure people. She meant the smile.
A warm feeling spread across Giyuu's heart. "I love you more," she whispered into his face. "And we have a whole life time ahead, right, Giyuu?"
His face turned hot and red. This was what must've felt like for her. He laughed, raising his hand to cover his face. His ears were burning and the air around him felt burning. He stumbled back, unable to stop smiling. Shinobu laughed beside him, poking him vigorously, saying, "Tomioka-san, will you please look at me?"
Oh, god, it was great to be alive with her.
"Kochou, don't... do that," he warned. "I might explode."
"Tomioka-san, please look at me," Shinobu insisted. "I want to see your face as much as I can so I can remember it in my dream." Her voice had a tint of sadness and bittersweetness to it. It was uncontrollable. Giyuu looked at her, the girl who had once sacrificed her own life to save the world.
"Kochou..." Just as the name left his lips, Shinobu started crying, the tears she had withheld for so many years. She wiped her face furiously, her frail shoulders shaking a little. There was this moment of pause, that washed over both of them that made everything so real. Right, they searched each other for decades and decades, perhaps generations and generations. And now, they had finally met, finally.
Finally.
Finally.
Oh god.
"Tomioka-san," Shinobu reached out her hand and without hesitating, Giyuu hugged her again. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and inhaled his scent, the familiarity. She knew her tears must be wetting his shoulders but she didn't care, it didn't matter. He didn't care either. Finally, finally, finally. She wanted to do so many things with him, she imagined this exact moment again and again and she was so, so glad it was now.
"I love you," Giyuu whispered into her hair, his voice cracked and soft.
"You already said that," Shinobu pointed out, her voice equally broken. It was tears of joy that kept streaming down her cheeks, she told herself. It was probably the most she ever cried in her life. She felt his hand brush through her hair, the delicate and tentative movement in the strands of her dark hair.
"I know," he whispered. "And I will say it again and again."
And at that she cried again. She felt as though she could cry forever and forever, she was confident she could. If there was anything that she could do, it would be crying for Tomioka Giyuu. She knew he had already done that for her, crying and mourning for everything about her. Now it was her turn. She could do it. She was prepared.
She was prepared to spend this life with him.
He was prepared to spend this life with her.
They had been waiting for this moment, longer than they could ever remember.
It was time for their happy ending.