Chapter Text
Jaunik Kashira was a green-blooded troll, approximately 13 sweeps old, with horns that swept back in large curves, similar to a mountain goat’s. He was quite tall, but had the unfortunate habit of slouching. In Alternia’s old regime being large seemed to only invite fights from young upstarts out to prove something, and Jaunik, unfortunately for his surroundings on the then ultra-militant planet, was never an aggressive troll by nature.
However, after the previous empress was overthrown and trollish society began a long and gradual journey to nonviolence, the habit of slouching followed him. Perhaps it was because he happened to have short friends, or maybe it simply made it easier to get through doorways, or it was that seeming a fraction smaller made him more approachable.
Which proved to be necessary, because otherwise he was almost painfully shy. He found it hard to approach people on his own, carrying his tallness and shyness like he was some sort of unforgivably awkward beast that he had to apologize to the world for being. He stuttered sometimes when flustered, but given a topic he was interested in and a willing ear, he could talk for days.
He could talk about his friends, food, and video games, but his most passionate topic was always animals. Alternia as a planet had never been overly concerned about things like biodiversity or the ecosystem, and had been slowly growing more and more polluted. As a juvenile Jaunik began to photograph Alternian animals and lusii to document them before they disappeared, never thinking that it would get farther than simply remembering them and sharing with the few other trolls online who held similar interests.
He never knew that the girl on his online forum sharing pictures of cuttlefish with overly cutesy captions would go on to overthrow the condescension and become the new empress, or that she would even remember him or his photos.
However, when Earth was discovered by the Alternians, Feferi thought it wise to show the Alternian public more of the new planet, which is how he got a commission from the very throne to photograph Earth’s animals.
This of course led him to where he was now, adjusting the lens of his camera where he lay hidden, focusing on the majestic alien fauna in front of him.
“Oh look at you…” He whispered, snapping shot after shot, “What a beauty.”
The raccoon he was photographing was currently digging through the back-alley trash of a local bar. It held a piece of half-eaten pizza in its tiny hands and began to eat.
Jaunik had never seen anything more beautiful in his life.
That was, of course, until the back door of the bar opened, shining bright light into the alley, making the raccoon hiss and run away.
“Oh fuck,” a voice slurred from the open doorway, “This isn’t the bathroom.”
At the top of the steps leading into the alley, leaning against the open door, was a human woman. She was wearing a short glittery black dress that caught the light from the bar and sent tiny flecks of color into the alley. With the light from inside the bar haloed around her, Jaunik thought she looked regal, like a queen surveying their kingdom.
It was a poor kingdom, containing nothing but Jaunik, a couple of raccoons and a lot of trash, but it was a kingdom nonetheless.
Her hair was long, wavy and seemed to be mussed after a long night of drinking. Glitter eyeshadow weighed down already sleepy eyes, and she was carrying her tiny clutch like it weighed much more than it possibly could.
“Alright, not the bathroom!” She put a hand up and announced, still unstable on her feet, “So I’ll just-” However, before she could say the rest of that sentence, her heel caught on a slippery part of the concrete stairs and she fell backwards into the alley.
Jaunik yelped, rising up from where he had been camouflaged among the trash and diving to catch her. He managed it barely, long arms catching her under her knees and the small of her back before he fell back onto the trash, her on his lap.
She blinked, her drink-addled mind taking a moment to process what just happened.
Jaunik stared down at her nervously, unsure of what to say and once again feeling big and awkward and out of place. “Uh… um…” He began to sweat, his ears flicking back as he struggled to think of something appropriate to call her, they had only just met today. “Uh, h-human- I mean w-w- I m-mean-” He winced, swallowing around what felt like cotton in his throat. “E-earth… g-girl? A-are you ok?”
The so-dubbed Earth girl snorted. A slow grin spread across her face as she looked up at him, eyebrows quirked, “I’m peachy, Space-man!”
Jaunik’s brow furrowed, “Y-you can’t actually be from space you know, I-I’m from a planet.”
She grinned wider at that, sticking a finger in his face like a lawyer capitalizing on a key fact. “A planet, IN SPACE!”
That startled a laugh out of Jaunik, “B-by that logic we’re both space people since uh E-earth is also in space.”
She raised her finger as if to argue the point but retracted it, “Good point…” She stiffened in his lap suddenly, “Wait holy CRAP why were you laying down in the alley?” She sat up in his lap and took his face in her hands, squishing his cheeks together before maneuvering his face this way and that, searching for injuries, “You aren’t hurt are you?”
Jaunik shook his head but not hard enough to dislodge the gentle warm hands on his face and was silently pleased that they stayed right where they were. “N-no I w-was photographing animals.”
The girl’s eyes lit up, “Oooo! Can I see?”
Jaunik smiled, handing her his camera. His cheeks suddenly went cold without her hands there, even as he felt a warm blush work its way across his face.
She held the camera over her, still across his lap as she clicked through the images. She laughed, kicking her stilletoed feet and Jaunik distantly realized that she had a run in her stockings.
“Ha!” She giggled clicking through the photos, obvious glee across her face as she leaned back, her long hair brushing his thigh. “He’s eating pizza! Like a person!”
She sat up then, wiggling in his lap and he felt frozen on the spot, remembering their positions.
She tilted her head back, pinning him with large eyes. “I’m still in your lap.” She whispered, like it was some sort of secret, her eyes glittering under the fringe of her hair.
“I-I’m aware.” Jaunik swallowed around a lump in his throat, cursing how he stuttered that last sentence out.
“Ok but like hear me out,” she leaned against him, “I don’t think I wanna move, you are like, insanely comfortable.”
Jaunik flushed, “It’s uh, it’s cold out here though.”
She huffed, “Yeah true.” She stood up then, leaving the comfort of his lap. He embarrassingly enough missed her mammalian warmth. She looked down at him, one of the straps of her dress falling down her shoulder. “Come inside with me and I can sit in your lap there.”
Jaunik could feel his blush reach the tips of his ears, his throat releasing something like a strangled chitter and squeak, “W-what?”
She grinned, slow and wide. Flirtatious in the way she angled her body, the low tone of her voice. “I’m Ava by the way.”
Jaunik stiffened, “H-” He shook his head, “That’s not nearly long enough to be a name.”
Ava gave him a look, obviously caught off-guard as she choked back a laugh, “Yes it is! Ava is a perfectly respectable name!”
Jaunik frowned, looking down at his hands instead of up at her, though her knee and the run in her stockings were still in his field of vision. “Well maybe if your name was ‘Avaahh’ or ‘Aavaah’ but as it is ‘Ava’ can in no way meet the 6 letter requirement.
She laughed, “You can’t just lengthen a person’s name!” She grinned, “Go on, what’s your name then?”
Jaunik stiffened, “M-me? I-” He swallowed, “Well we haven’t even been introduced and-”
She prodded him gently, “Come on I’ve been in your lap, I’d say we’re pretty well introduced.”
“J-jaunik.” He squeaked out, unsure if when she fell on him he cracked his head against the concrete. “My name is Jaunik.” This entire conversation seemed so far out of the realm of the possible he was beginning to suspect he was unconscious and bleeding in the alley after a raccoon threw something at him.
It wouldn’t be the first time.
“Jaunik,” Ava tested the name in her mouth, mulling it over. She smiled, a gleam in her eye. “Alright from now on you’re ‘Jan’.”
Jaunik stiffened, “What?”
Ava grinned, “You lengthened my name so I’m shortening yours, fair is fair!”
Jaunik grimaced, rubbing the back of his neck, a green blush across his cheeks, “I- I ok. Y-yeah that’s fair.”
Ava snorted, pointing a finger at him and poking him right in the cheek where his blush was the darkest. “Ha! You’re blushing!” She leaned back, still a little unstable on her feet, “Don’t worry I’m like 80 to 90 percent joking. Lemme buy you a drink for saving my life.”
Jaunik’s mind was spinning, “T-trolls can’t digest alcohol.”
She pouted, taking his sleeve and tugging ineffectually. “Then lemme buy you a fruit juice? Trolls can get drunk off of sugar, right?”
Jaunik smiled, his ears flicking forward. “O-kay, one fruit juice.”
Jaunik was halfway through his fourth cup of juice, pineapple-sticky glasses littering the table as he tearfully told Ava about pigeons.
“A-and they were brought to this continent as a d-domestic animal!” he stiffed, overcome with emotion for the little birds, “A-and everyone treats them like they’re nothing but pests! T-they were meant to be companions and m-messengers but now they live in the garbage and are h-hated unjustly by the people who brought them here in the first place!”
Ava sniffed, tears shining in her eyes, but not falling, as they were both overcome with emotion. She held a martini glass, the table littered with far more of the dirtied glasses. “People are so cruel!” She told him feelingly, “Fuck, dude. Have you ever seen a dolphin?”
Jaunik stared into his glass, trying to remember what a dolphin was, leaning his face against the sticky table. “N-no?”
“They’re aq-aquatic mammals,” Ava slurred, “And they’re amazing. They’re like crazy smart! Like, people-levels of smart.” She shook her head, “But people are like, hunting them and destroying the ocean where they live!”
Jaunik gasped, his head lurching up from the table to gape at her, a sticky napkin sticking to his cheek, “No!”
Ava threw up her hands, “I KNOW!” She leaned in conspiratorially, “Octopusseses, or-or-orange-utans, fucking gorillas! They’re all SMART AS SHIT but they have NO RIGHTS!”
Jaunik clasped his cup of pineapple juice to his chest, spilling most of it, “That’s- that’s awful! Our species always thought yours was the only lusii-level or- or- organism on this planet.”
The bartender put another martini in front of Ava, “Compliments of that gentleman in the booth.”
Jaunik and Ava leaned over to see an older balding man in a nice suit waggle his eyes at Ava.
“Oh,” Jaunik smiled, “That’s nice of him. H-humans are always doing nice things for each other.”
Ava huffed, “No offense, but it really doesn’t sound like humans very well.” She sent a fake smile over her shoulder at the other man and tittered out an overly-cute but ultimately hollow “Thank youuuu~” before turning back to Jaunik and downing the martini in one go.
She slammed the glass onto the table counter, “God everyone on this planet is a fucking moron.”
“I mean like…” Jaunik paused, “I- I don’t think you’re right in thinking that humans aren’t nice. Also, remember you’re on this planet too when you make generalizations.”
She looked over at him from over the dirtied martini glasses between them. Her hair was in her face as she gave him a wry smile. “Oh no I’m definitely counting myself among the dumbasses.”
The bartender sighed and handed her yet another martini, “Guy in the weird coat by the door this time.”
Jaunik leaned over to see the greasiest human he had ever seen making eyes at Ava.
Ava sent another plastic smile over her shoulder, “Thank youuu~” She turned back to Jaunik, “7.53 Billion godforsaken dumbasses on this stupid rock,” she chuckled, downing the second drink, taking the skewered olive out of the alcohol and flinging it vaguely behind her. “And me!” She pinned him with a look, “Besides, how could you possibly know what humans are like? How many of us do you even know?”
Jaunik shrugged, “I’ve only been on assignment here a week so uh, you. You’re the first one I really met so-” He smiled “I guess that means you set the standard for me, since uh, you’re so nice.”
Ava stared at him. She motioned vaguely at him, her hands flailing.
Jaunik fidgeted where he sat, not sure what he had said wrong.
“Oh my god, you’re serious.” She threw her hands up, “You-You can’t just go around town saying shit that heartfelt and sweet, Jesus CHRIST that should be illegal.”
Jaunik’s ears flicked back, “I-I mean I’m not? Going around town saying that, I-I mean. Like I said you’re the first person I’ve really met here and-”
Ava put her hand to his face, “No, no, you stop that with your adorable earnestness I don’t know how much more I can take.”
Jaunik’s ears flicked forward, unsure of what she was trying to say.
Ava seemed to come to a decision, her eyes hooded as she looked at him. “Hey…” She leaned forward, a small teasing smile on his face, he could smell the spice of her perfume, “Do you uh… Want to stop by my apartment for uh… coffee?”
Oh, Jaunik had never had coffee before. He nodded, “Yes.”
Ava grinned, “Nice, let’s get out of here.” She stood up, shrugging on her coat and tugging Jaunik up out of his chair. “Bye Gary.” She waved to the bartender as she shooed Jaunik out the door, Jaunik downing the last of his juice before setting the glass on the counter.
The bartender motioned to Jaunik’s empty glasses of pineapple juice, “Hey you owe me for the juice!”
Ava rolled her eyes, pushing Jaunik out the door before following him out, “Charge it to the fuck in the suit.”
With that both of them were released into the cold night. Jaunik’s head was spinning slightly and he tipped it back, taking a deep breath of air to steady himself.
Ava called a cab, pushing Jaunik into the back seat before settling in next to him.
Jaunik watched the slow roll of the city go by the partially fogged-up window. Human cities had a different feel to them, it was like someone took the time to care about how things looked and not just how efficiently workers could travel to their assigned stations. He’d never seen a park before he came here, not a real one anyways, one open to just anyone to wander in. Seadwellers sometimes had gardens, and of course there are rural places where you could still be in nature, but never a public park. He should tell the Empress about parks when he sent his next batch of photos in, that seems like something Feferi would like.
He pointed at a building with statues of animals in front of it. “What’s that?”
Ava leaned over his shoulder to look, “What, the zoo?”
Jaunik looked back at her, his ears flicking, “What’s a zoo?”
Ava shrugged, “They keep exotic animals there for people to learn about.”
Jaunik’s eyes were wide, “Can we go there?”
Ava snorted, “They’re closed now.”
Jaunik frowned for a moment before turning a hopeful look to Ava, “W-would you take me? You know, if you ever had time that is.”
There was something unreadable in Ava’s eyes, scanning over his face as if expecting some sort of hidden barb to the innocent question. “Y-yeah.” She nodded slowly, “Yeah I’d take you to the zoo.”
Jaunik lit up then, smiling at her warmly.
Ava cursed under her breath before leaning up towards the cab driver. “Look I’ll give you a twenty-dollar tip if you fucking step on it, ok?”
Jaunik’s ears flicked, “Step on w-” he began to ask before he was jerked back in his seat by the cabbie’s sudden acceleration.
The cab driver dropped them off in front of a rough-looking apartment complex. Ava pulled him in past the cracked glass door, through a vestibule where someone was sleeping, and up a couple of flights of stairs before stopping at a particular door and fishing out her keys.
There was a mouse in the hallway.
Jaunik tried to pull out his camera but unfortunately wasn’t quick enough. He took out his paper and pencil, though he found he was a bit too inebriated to write well, going over the lines despite himself. “Brown, most likely female, wild deer mouse,” he slurred, “New York.”
“Finally,” Ava whispered to herself, heedless of his ramblings as she opened the door to her apartment.
After this, a bunch of things happened at once for Jaunik.
First, Jaunik saw the inside of her apartment and he thought to himself, “Well those are some nice windows. I wonder if she’d let me birdwatch here-” but before he could voice the thought, suddenly Ava had kicked off her heels, grabbed a hold of his belt with one hand, and used that leverage to half climb him, half pull him down for an insistent kiss. He whirled for leverage, his hands landed on her shoulders, squeaking into her mouth.
She bit his lip, leaning back to smile and whisper, “Holy shit you’re so cute, how are you even real?” And with that the hand on his belt slipped into his pants and-
Jaunik yelped, his lanky arms pinwheeling as he fell, taking both him and Ava to the ground. Ava yelled, landing on Jaunik’s chest hard. “Sorry, sorry, sorry!” He sat up, Ava in his lap as he looked her over, “Are you ok?”
Ava grimaced, “Are you ok? Sorry, I was trying for a smooth seduction there but I think I missed.” She rubbed the back of her neck, “I thought you were picking up the signals I was laying down, but uh…”
Jaunik shook his head frantically, “I d-didn’t but I’m not obverse to being s-seduced!” he stuttered out and immediately regretted ever being hatched, “I m-mean…”
Ava waited patiently, her head cocked to the side as he struggled to get the words out.
He waved his hands, trying to illustrate, huffing in frustration before trying words again. “Y-you’re one of the only people who’ve ever felt the same way about pigeons as I do.” He grimaced, his shoulders hunching, “It was just too much at once.”
Ava shrugged, looking away awkwardly and tucking a bit of hair behind her ear.
“I mean…” Jaunik gave her a sheepish look, “We could watch nature documentaries on Netflix instead?” He looked away, his ears flicking down, “I-if you’d like, I mean.”
Ava sat up, a small smile on her face, “You know what? I’d like that actually.”
Hours later, the two of them were curled up on Ava’s couch, the low and soothing voice of the narrator washing over them. The blanket was across their laps and there was a bowl of popcorn between them. Jaunik was fast asleep.
Ava watched his sleeping face. Every time she thought he couldn’t get cuter he did something else hopelessly endearing. She pulled the blanket up around his shoulders, “Goddamn it you adorable bastard,” She whispered, careful not to wake him up. Ava leaned against his side, feeling exhaustion weigh down her eyelids as she yawned, “I guess you can stay for the night.”
And with that both of them were asleep.
Ava King was a human woman, approximately 27 years old with coffee and cream skin and long wavy black hair. She was pleasantly curvy, but quite short. She was pretty in her own way, but plenty of girls were, and most people would expect her to blend into the crowd.
But something about her demanded to be set apart. The glint in her eye was like the shine off a knife’s edge, the twist to her lips as she looked at you the disapproval of a queen looking down at a prisoner, her presence was like being in a room with a live viper, both captivating and terrifying at the same time.
However, this was no accident. Long ago Ava took a look at the yielding and naive girl she once was and began to carve away her softness, like hands digging into clay, inch by slow inch until she felt as if she was live marble, impervious and unmalleable.
It started when she was a young girl, staring down at her book with a wry twist to her lips as she listened to her parents scream in their apartment kitchen, turning the page to the tune of dishes breaking.
It continued when the police came and told her to pack a bag, and that they would be taking her away. She didn’t cry as she picked up her curiously already packed backpack. She didn’t cry when she passed her mother sobbing in the kitchen. She didn’t cry when her father screamed at her, the angry man being held back by other officers. She simply put her backpack into the back of the squad car and sat down, watching the city go by.
When the older boy at her foster home tried to push her around she was ready for it. She had a small pouch of quarters in a tied off sock at the end of her mitten. He never did expect a right hook from a girl that small. They didn’t bother messing with her again.
She grew up, got herself through college and into veterinary school. She was loud, she had opinions on just about everything under the sun. This was both her greatest strength and her greatest weakness, drawing people to her, but more often than not pushing them away just as fast.
The people who got to stay were few and far between, but she liked it that way for the most part. Most of her lovers were gone from her bed the next day, but there were two times in her life she fell in love.
He met her when she had first moved into her own apartment, still going through the transition to marble, when there was still softness to her, heart shyly bared for him.
Sam was charming, with opinions louder than hers, but they found a certain kind of rhythm to their clashes, fire and ice, explosive and passionate. Laying next to him in bed and watching the strong line of his muscled shoulder she dared to imagine a life with him.
She had trusted him, and that was the worst part when she found a single long blonde hair on his hoodie. She had told herself that she was being paranoid when she followed him from work in her car, until he went to a different apartment and was greeted by a kiss from another woman.
When he came back to her apartment she was ready for him, back ramrod straight at the kitchen table and hellfire in her eyes.
“Who is she?” Ava demanded, watching his face carefully.
“Who?” He asked blithely, going to her refrigerator and rummaging through. Somehow that made her even angrier, like he was insulting her intelligence, that he thought he could try and weasel out of this instead of facing what he’d done.
Ava’s lip curled, “The other woman.”
He laughed, hand to the back of his neck as he looked down at where she sat, “She’s not-”
Ava shook her head, “Oh for fucks sake Sam, I saw you two together! You can’t-”
He shook his head, “No I mean-” He sighed, looking down at her pityingly, “She isn’t the other woman,” He motioned to Ava, “You are.”
Ava stared at him.
“Come on Ava,” Sam huffed, his brows quirked, “We both know you’re not wife material, are you?”
That night Ava drove to the woods, leaving her car door open as she stalked through the trees, a can of gasoline in one hand and a paper grocery bag in the other.
She burned his X-box and his hoodies, yelling out into the night as she tore the fabric in her hands before throwing it to the fire. She probably fit the crazy ex girlfriend stereotype at the time, and she knew if Sam saw her then he would just sigh and look at her as if she proved him right, as if he was the intellectual between them because he could hurt people, call it ‘logic’ and feel no remorse.
Even just thinking of him and his smug little smile made her want to hit him with her car.
Ava sat on a stump, staring into the fire as she smoked a cigarette and she thought that in some ways he was right. She never exactly had a gleaming example of marriage to look up to when she was a kid, but she’d seen TV and movies and she knew what the ideal was at least.
She wasn’t soft, she wasn’t demure, she couldn’t cook for shit, and she had no idea how to fold a fitted sheet. There wouldn’t be any soft mornings for her, where she made her spouse breakfast and they shared a kiss in the soft golden of the morning. She wouldn’t be the one in an apron and holding a tray of cookies as she beamed at children running around on Christmas day.
She took one last draw of her cigarette before flicking it into the fire, thinking bitterly that the blonde woman probably knew how to cook.
As she stood up from her stump, brushing off the leaves from where they had stuck to her sweatpants she resigned herself to her lot. So maybe she wasn’t wife material, so what? The blonde woman could keep Sam. She was always better taking care of herself anyways. She’d spend her life doing what she wanted to do, not letting who she is be dictated by someone else.
It was like the last piece of her softness was also on the bonfire the night after Sam broke her heart. She didn’t have any softness left to offer someone else, only bitterness and marble-hardness.
She’d stay aloof, she’d stay unattached, and she’d never have to deal with having her heart being broken ever again.
She walked back to her car, looking at her own wild reflection in the rear-view mirror. The leaves in her hair, the soot-stained tank top and the hard look in her eyes.
Live for herself first and foremost, not letting anyone else play with her heart.
How hard could that be?
The morning after Jaunik and Ava fell asleep on Ava’s couch, she woke up slowly to the first light of the morning, cushioned against his chest. It had been awhile since someone had stayed this long, and for a moment she was uncomfortably reminded of those mornings with Sam, watching the broad line of his shoulders silhouetted in the morning sun as he slept turned away from her, rising and falling with his breath.
However, instead of sleeping turned away from her, Ava always reaching out for him, Jaunik was facing towards her, his lanky frame curled around her. His face was slack with sleep, his long hair messy around his face and his mouth open.
She brushed his hair out of his face, a frightening sort of tenderness for him sparking in her chest.
He opened his eyes then and Ava was reminded of a friend of her’s saying how she couldn’t get over the slitted eyes in the Alternians, the grey skin, how their long ears twitched and the slightly different structure of their faces. He was alien, that much she couldn’t deny, but in an odd way she found it comforting.
She couldn’t find a creature more different than Sam if she tried.
“Hey,” He whispered, a small smile on his face.
She smiled back, “Hey.”
Ava mentally prepared for each scenario she could think of for what could happen next. They hadn’t had sex last night, so maybe he would want to have sex this morning before he left? Or maybe there might be time for breakfast before that. Or maybe he would want to leave right away and there would be an awkward goodbye period as they disentangled and-
He looked hopeful, looking up at her with his ears perked forward, “Do you still wanna go to the zoo?”
Ava paused, letting it sink in. “Yeah,” She whispered back, her brows perking up, “Yeah I still wanna go to the zoo.”
Ava would later muse that after that it seemed that their goodbyes she always envisioned never happened. They went to the zoo the day after, she bought him popcorn and he bought her ice cream, Ava smiling as he spent more time taking pictures of the squirrels stealing food from the picnic area than any of the more exotic animals.
Then Sundays at the zoo became a routine, as well as Friday movie night, and then Wednesday dinners, and then them spending her lunch breaks on Monday together.
So the ‘goodbyes’ never happened, they just turned into ‘see you tomorrows’.
She could never quite pinpoint the moment he became essential, when her quiet declaration of living her life just for herself gained an exception. She had always worried there would be another Sam, someone who took up every part of herself until she didn’t even know who she was without them anymore, she didn’t consider the possibility of gently making room next to her life for another.
Never demanding or pushing, just a lanky body next to hers on the couch, both of them enthralled in a nature documentary, take-out in the evenings when their experiments with cooking didn’t work, her having a cup of coffee in the living room and watching him on her balcony, cooing to the birds that always seemed drawn to him, landing on his shoulders and horns.
And someone who finally shared her opinions on pigeons.
Ava had once drunkenly complained about him to one of her friends in a bar.
“You don’t get it, Jess,” Ava’s words were slightly slurred, an impressive amount of martini glasses on the tables, “He’s perfect, I hate it.”
Jess swirled her own drink pensively, “Didn’t you say he once tried to steal a squirrel from central park, almost got arrested for ‘liberating’ the beta fish from a pet store, and cried while watching Air bud with you?”
Ava tossed her head back, throwing her hands up in the air, “Just like I said! Perfect!”
Jess patted her hand consolingly, “Whatever, you say Ava.”
Ava sniffed, “He’s just so, kind and sweet. I don’t get it.”
Jess gave her a small smile, “What you don’t get is that you found a good man Ava, surprisingly those still exist.” She took a swig of her own drink, “At least in space still.”
Ava had leaned her head against the table and thought about that for a moment. Jess was right, he was good in a way that terrified her. She had thought so cynically for so long and he made her rethink everything.
And worst of all, she loved him for it.
Soon after that, they moved in together when Ava found out he was living in a ‘Wildlife photographer’s encampment’ under the bow bridge in central park.
“I don’t know why it’s such a problem,” Jaunik told her one day in the park, his shoulders covered in a camouflage blanket, his camera in his hands and a canteen on a hip, “This is usually what I do when I’m in the wilds of a strange new planet.”
Ava gave him a look from where she was sitting on a bench opposite from him, her sunglasses low on her nose. A mother and a baby carriage rolled down the path between them. Ava rubbed the bridge of her nose, “You’re not in the wilds of anything here dude,” She tossed her second pair of keys at him, beaning him between the eyes, “We’re going back to my apartment, you’re taking a proper shower and then we’re falling asleep to the new Netflix documentary.”
Jaunik flailed, finally catching the keys. He raised a finger as if to bring up a point.
“And no, what you’ve been doing doesn’t count as a proper shower!” Ava glowered at him, her hands on her hips, “If I’d known you’ve been bathing in the central park river I wouldn’t have tried so hard to fuck you when we first met.”
Jaunik smiled slyly, “Saying ‘Not tried so hard to fuck you’ implies that you still would’ve tried.”
Ava sighed, “Ok yeah I probably still would’ve,” She pointed an accusing finger at him, “But I’m not proud of that fact though!”
That was about 4 years ago now, and their lives had since comfortably slotted together. Ava and Jaunik were perfectly happy with their relationship. They were happy! They were all the needed. Their relationship was really good, there was nothing either of them wanted or needed.
They were fine!
Everything was fine.
They were on one of their customary Sunday trips to the zoo when Jaunik’s shoelaces came undone. They paused where they had been walking along the walkway surrounding the flamingo exhibit.
“Ava hang on,” Jaunik wiggled his foot uncomfortably, “I gotta tie my shoes again.”
Ava shrugged, looking out at the flamingos, licking absently at her ice cream cone. “Yeah sure, hand me your camera so you don’t scratch the lens again.”
Jaunik put the camera strap over her head before leaning in for a kiss, “Thank you!”
Ava laughed, pushing him back slightly, “Come on and tie your stupid shoe,” She huffed, a small smile on her face, “I wanna see the Tamarins again before we leave.” She then started fiddling with his camera, going through some of the more recent pictures on his phone. “I really like the lighting on the picture of the mouse standing on a hot dog in the trash can.”
“Thanks,” Jaunik smiled, kneeling down on one knee and tying his shoelaces, “It’s definitely my favorite of the day!”
Jaunik was about to stand up when he saw something nestled under the bushes. He reached in, picking up the little glittery thing and inspecting it closely.
It was a tiny dolphin-shaped mood ring. He saw some similar ones in the gift shop earlier.
“Hey Ava!” Jaunik held the ring up to her from where he was kneeling, “Look at this!”
Ava looked up from his camera, “What Ja-”
Jaunik was expecting a look of mild amusement, Ava liked dolphins so maybe she’d keep it, or maybe she’d roll her eyes and tell him to stop picking up trash again but-
A look of abject horror crossed over Ava’s face, like so many of her worst fears were coming true in that moment in that sunny zoo next to the flamingo exhibit.
Ava snatched the ring from his hand and tossed it out over the barrier and into the exhibit, flamingos honking and scattering as the ring was thrown in their midst.
Jaunik stared over at where Ava had thrown the ring, obviously confused.
“What the hell were you thinking?” Ava yelled, hugging herself around the middle as if she didn’t she would burst into a thousand sharp-edged pieces.
Jaunik stood up, brushing off his pants. He put his hands on her shoulders, trying to calm her down but she shrugged him off, “I don’t understand, I thought you liked dolphins?”
That only seemed to make Ava angrier, “You need to talk to me before pulling off something stupid like that! If you had, you would’ve known that I didn’t-”
Jaunik had his hands out in front of him, “How could I have asked you about this ahead of time? I only just found it under the bushes now!”
That made Ava pause, “Just now?”
Jaunik nodded frantically, “Just now!”
Ava released a shuddering breath, “You just found it now, oh my god.” Her shoulders slumped and she sat heavily down on a park bench. “God you scared the hell out of me.”
Jaunik leaned down, trying to look her in the eyes as her face was downcast, “Ava, is there something that I’m not getting because-” He froze when he saw her face, horrified to see tear tracks across her cheeks.
Ava didn’t cry.
She watched Marley and Me with Jaunik just that past week and didn’t shed a tear while Jaunik was a blubbering mess.
Something was very wrong.
"Ava!" Jaunik gasped, near panic, "You're crying!"
Ava blinked, putting a hand to her cheek and wiping, seeming almost astonished at her own tear-wet fingertips. “Shit.”
“Ava?” Jaunik hovered nearby, unsure of what he did or how to help.
Ava shook her head, standing suddenly, shoving her purse into his hands, and walking very quickly to the public bathrooms, “I’ll be back in a second.”
Jaunik held her purse in front of him, watching the stiff line of her shoulders as she left for the restrooms, “Ava?”
And with that he stood alone on the walkway.