Chapter Text
You wondered how something so white could be so dark.
You exhaled heavily, your breath forming a hazy cloud before you, and continued to focus on the scene in front of you. A blizzard, stronger than any blizzard you’ve ever encountered, slammed your small frame and numbed your skin. You were already battered from braving the wilderness for days, injured because of an ambush before you ended up here, and halfway starving to death.
The only reason you are still alive right now is because your guardian, Optimus, was with you.
The Decepticons had discovered the location of the Autobot base, to everyone’s surprise. The team stood their ground and engaged them, vastly outnumbered. Wheeljack then showed up, seemingly out of nowhere, and fought off fliers to buy the team time to retreat inside and evacuate. Everyone else made it out, but you and Optimus remained, and he was otherwise engaged. You opened the groundbridge by using the computers, and ran towards it, stopping in your tracks to scream at Optimus to come with you. After confirming everyone else made it out, he followed you as the base collapsed.
Now the two of you were alone, in god-knows-where, in the middle of a snowstorm. You had been walking for days, or for what seemed like days, in almost complete silence. You were in shock and couldn’t really say anything.
You were doing somewhat fine until the sudden blizzard caught the both of you off guard. When you arrived here, it was already too cold, and snowy, but not like this. Optimus was silent, concentrated, but you knew he was starting to panic internally. You figured you would survive but considering there was no end in sight to the vast expanse of nothing but snowy trees and icy terrain, your chances, and hopes, of survival were dwindling. Your fingers actually hurt not only from your injuries, but from the onset of frostbite. They had turned a dark red in the process and were swelling.
You tried to stay positive.
The reason you weren’t in his cabin right now was because he was desperately looking for a shelter, for the both of you. A cave, a cliff facing away from the wind, anything he hoped, that would decrease the probability of you dying. He would survive perhaps, but remembering his last arctic endeavor, he wasn’t too happy with the uncertainty. Your phone couldn’t get any reception out here, not that you would be able to do much with it anyway, considering that the Decepticons were monitoring everyone’s communications.
Your joints ached; your eyes felt like they were going to stick together as the snow blasted your face. You wanted to lie down in the snow, and close your eyes, you were so exhausted. Every ounce of strength was drained from your body, your stomach growled and clenched painfully at the lack of nutrients and the overexertion of energy. You were only wearing black pants, an under tank, a long-sleeved shirt, a windbreaker over it, and running shoes. Not ideal for subzero temperatures. You could barely see Optimus through the snowfall, that’s how dense it was. Anxiety spiked in your chest as you thought about losing him, and that same fear mustered up whatever energy you had left and made you sprint to get closer to him.
He suddenly stopped and turned to you, optics barely visible. You started getting dizzy. His optic ridges scrunched in worry. He took one look behind him, and then scooped you up before your body hit the ground.
______
You woke up with a headache and pain in your arms and legs. Everything was blurry, bathed in a dull grey light, and still cold, but less cold than before. You realized you were moving. Well, not you but the vehicle you were in. As you gathered your senses, you noticed you were in Optimus’s cabin, and he was driving slowly, movement perpendicular to the winds.
“I was unsure if you would wake up.” His voice riddled with static, played through the speakers.
You only groaned in response. He didn’t like that and seemed to speed up. You sat up and cracked your aching neck. You wondered if he was freezing to death too, because he didn’t even have the heat on anymore. After a few minutes of frozen silence, you spoke up.
“Where are we going?” you asked, voice hoarse.
Optimus hesitated for a few seconds.
“Anywhere else.”
“Optimus do you know if we’re even heading south.”
“I am sure.”
You laid back again and stared outside ahead of you. Nothing but white snow and black trees covered in a icy blue haze. You noticed ice forming on the corners of his windshield. It appeared to maybe be some time in the afternoon, judging by the dimming light in the sky. What would you know, the sun just…never moved. You must be at or near the Arctic circle. You closed your eyes and breathed deeply. The previous nap had caused you to regain some energy, but you were still tired.
Optimus suddenly spoke up.
“Y/N.” he said almost frantically.
Your eyes shot open.
“Do you see that? There is a structure up ahead.”
You squinted and through the snow, you could barely make out the vague structure of what appeared to be a radio tower sticking up above the trees. It looked too geometric to be natural. Optimus sped up, and headed towards it, swaying from side to side as he skidded on the ice. You could now see the structure with better detail.
A decent-sized enclosed concrete building, with a single metal staircase in the front. A radio tower and a few satellites perched on top. Finally, salvation. Optimus stopped and parked in front of it and you could make out a large deep blue sign by the entrance.
“Keno Radio Station, Rest Area and Hotel.” Read the sign in white letters.
You saw that the front doors were boarded up, and chained. There was only a single vehicle in sight. It appeared to be a police car of some sorts, with the letters RCMP GRC and some sort of coat of arms on the side. had no idea what that meant, but judging from the signage on the building, you assumed you were in an English-speaking country. The car was abandoned and buried in the snow. The vehicle didn’t look old at all, it appeared to be of a recent model, but no signs of rust or damage. That concerned you but was overridden by your own sense of survival.
“We must enter.” Optimus said.
He let you out and you stood out in the freezing cold once more. You shivered and watched Optimus transform and yanked off the chains and boards to the door with ease. The doors were metal double doors, a dark grey color, and made a very loud metallic groan when Optimus rammed them open. Instead of walking to the entrance, Optimus picked you up and placed you inside the now open doorway. You then heard more transformation sounds, and saw he had mass displaced to about 8 feet and followed you inside. He slammed the doors shut and barricaded them by sliding a plank through the handles.
It was dark, but you could make out a skylight in the roof at a distance. Optimus turned on his headlights for you to see. You were standing in some sort of main area, the room was large maybe about 100 yards in width, and strangely, hexagonal. There were a few benches, doors, signs, a reception desk, a photo booth, and what looked like vending machines scattered about. The floor was covered in receipts, flyers, newspaper, and other documents. There was a large sign on the wall next to you that displayed a map of the area.
“Yukon Territory Wilderness Map.” You recognized the name Yukon from a documentary you watched.
“Okay, so we’re in the Yukon, in Canada.” You told Optimus.
“Is that far from Nevada?”
“Very.” You said quietly.
Optimus only hummed.
“We need to get the power running.” You told Optimus. He nodded in response. The building was also freezing, but at least there was a chance to get some type of heating system going.
You ventured in further into the building. The place looked? Recent. As if it was just closed for the night, everything was still in its place, minus the mess on the floor, but considering the outside was boarded up and chained, you knew it had been closed for some time. It was kind of eerie. Dust lingered in the air. You wandered for a bit, with Optimus closely behind you. You found the hotel area, but it was too dark, you decided to switch on the power first before doing anything else. You both came across a door that read “Basement: Maintenance room, storage room, fuse box.”
Of course, it had to be the basement. You opened the door with a loud creak and stood at the top of a dark concrete stairwell and gazed into the darkness. You guess Optimus noticed your concern and took the lead. At the bottom of the stairs was a hallway leading to three different rooms. You found the fuse box outside the maintenance room, but it was missing four fuses. Of course.
‘What is this Resident Evil?’ you thought as you searched the Maintenance room for spare fuses. Optimus was searching near you, to provide you with lighting.
You opened a drawer and found a couple new ones, seemingly untouched. With a sigh of relief, you grabbed four and headed back out.
“Do you know how to operate this?” Optimus asked as you placed the fuses in the appropriate slots.
“Yes.” You said.
Regardless of your answer, Optimus decided he would pull the lever to switch on the power, worried you might electrocute yourself. You let him, not wanting to argue. After sputtering for a brief moment, the power came back on with a loud uproar of humming, then stabilized itself. You let out yet another sigh of relief. Optimus gently smiled at you.
You searched the storage room for anything useful, and found mostly retail and hotel supplies, copy paper, and some old appliances. A long green locker, cracked slightly open, remained on the wall towards the ground, and you opened it. To your surprise, you found more than what you expected: A shotgun. A shotgun and shotgun shells. Though you knew you didn’t really need a weapon considering you were literally travelling with Optimus Prime, you took it anyways, after explaining to a worried Optimus that you knew how to use it. It came with a back scabbard, so you slung it around you. You also took a pair of bolt cutters that were hanging inside the locker door.
After making it back upstairs, now with adequate lighting, you saw at one end of the main room was what looked like a small convenience store. The roll up security gate was covering the front and was chained to the ground with a lock. Not for long. You approached the lock and cut it open, and Optimus rolled up the gate. You found the light switch on the wall and took a look around.
There were four off-white metal shelves in the center, one wall rack, a stand next to it, and 2 refrigerators in the back, the shelves were fully stocked, though some of the items were stale and possibly spoiled. You looked at the register, on the counter next to it, was money. Seriously, a stack of colorful Canadian Dollars bound by a rubber band, just sitting there. A layer of dust rested not just upon the bills, but on everything in the store actually.
Now this really concerned you. You were starting to get suspicious.
Why would someone abandon shop and leave everything here? Especially money?
“Something bad must have happened here to leave everything behind like this.” You told Optimus and he stood beside you. Optimus looked around, you noticed the way the mechanisms in his optics moved when he focused his sight on something, and he ex-vented.
“If there is any threat present, I will protect you.” He said in his usual leader-like fashion. He stood by the door and kept watch.
You grabbed a plastic red shopping basket and roamed around.
You took crackers, granola bars, dried fruit, nuts, candy, dried noodles and rice, cereal packets, a can of ground coffee, tea bags, a few bottles of electrolyte solution, water, painkillers, antibiotic cream, bandages, a first aid kit, soap, shampoo, vitamins, and rubbing alcohol.
There was a section with hiking supplies. You took a hiking backpack, a map of the Yukon Territory, a compass, a flashlight, a reusable water flask, some nylon ropes, and surprisingly, you found signal flares. You had to get another basket. On a wall rack adjacent to the hiking supplies was a small selection of outdoor clothing and a few pairs of hiking boots. You took a thermal sweater, a large insulated coat, thermal pants, socks, and a pair of boots. Your own clothing was NOT well suited for this climate.
“Is this not…stealing?” Optimus asked and he came up behind you, looking at your overflowing baskets.
“If this place was closed down, does it matter?”
Optimus hummed again.
You filled the backpack with supplies you wouldn’t need right now and walked out with one basket in hand. You made your way to the hotel area and pushed open the double pinewood doors. “Hotel” was a massive understatement, it was more like, a total of 6 rooms. You opened the door to room 1 and both you and Optimus were shocked to find that the ceiling had caved in, and the room was covered in fresh snow. There was somehow, grass growing in the corner of the room away from the cave-in. You closed that door, and placed a chair against it, so it wouldn’t blow out and chill the air even more. Each room was the same, so you decided on room 6 because it was farthest away from the caved-in room, meaning more warmth.
It had a single large bed with thick blankets, a small table with a single chair, a basic bathroom, a microwave, a portable butane gas stove placed on a bare counter with a sink, and a heater. It only had a very small window with thick frosted glass, high up on the wall and covered with a dark purple curtain, it was large enough to say, you could squeeze through it if you needed to escape. You assumed it was because of the weather.
Really weird. You set down your basket and backpack on the table, placed the shotgun on the far end, and turned on the heat.
“Y/N, I am going to recharge. Wake me if there is something wrong.” Optimus told you.
You nodded. Optimus laid back on the bed and groaned. You knew he was exhausted too; you didn’t say anything as he closed his optics and vented quietly. You stared at him for a moment, the leader of the Autobots, a powerful figure that half of his planet looked up to, passing out in a hotel room, you quietly chuckled.
You found a single steel pot and a butane gas canister in the counter’s cabinet space, managed to start up the stove, and emptied a water bottle into the pot to heat it up. As you did, you downed an entire water bottle in under a minute and began eating some of the snacks you stole from the store. You made a cup of tea, and thanked every single divine being there was as you took your first sip and relinquished in the warmth. You had regained complete sensation in your body, but it still hurt, and you were still aware of your injuries. You had to shower to clean them off before infection set in.
After feeding your starving body you grabbed a towel and some soap and went to the bathroom. You realized the door was missing, or it didn’t have a door to begin with. Weird. The bathroom was a stark, almost blinding white tile from floor to ceiling and had a humming fluorescent light tube over the cracked mirror. You looked at yourself.
Your skin was paler than its usual color, and dull. Your eyes had bags, and dark circles underneath them. Cuts and bruises were visible on your face and neck, and your h/c hair was becoming a bird’s nest. Literally. It was matted down, tangled, humid and smelly from the snow, and you even found a few pine needles in it.
You looked back at Optimus. From his vantage point he would get a full view of you if you undressed, but he was already out like a light in recharge. You never seem him so tired before.
You hesitated for a second and abandoned all convention. You stripped down your clothes, filled the sink with water and soap and let them soak. You would hand wash them after your shower.
You examined your body and noticed you had lost some weight, unhealthily of course, from starving for a few days. You recalled only finding some hawthorn berries covered in ice, a half-frozen mustard plant, burdock roots and birch sap you’ve been sipping from tapped trees to hydrate yourself along with eating snow.
There was a moderately deep gash that started on your clavicle, crossed your shoulder and ran down your upper back, it stopped bleeding a while ago, dried blood had crusted over it, swollen and red around the edges, and it looked like it was starting to get infected. You remembered how you got it, as you were running towards the groundbridge as the base was falling apart, and one of the panels from the ceiling structure had fallen and cut you.
There were other, smaller cuts, burns and bruises along your arms, torso and legs as well. Your hands were bruised, scratched up with blood and dirt under your fingernails.
The groundbridge didn’t close immediately after the two of you had ran through, and the explosive force of the base collapsing sent a powerful shockwave through the vortex, and slammed the both of you into the trees nearby, that’s why your midsection ached. You got splinters from that, and from running through the trees like a wild animal. Flaming debris also flew through the portal, burning your skin in a few areas on impact before being extinguished in the snow.
‘I probably fractured a rib.’ You thought.
The bitter cold probably numbed some of the pain, you figured. At least you were able to ignore it long enough to keep going. You were going to get seriously fucked over when you wake up tomorrow, though. You decided you would take painkillers and go to sleep later.
The floor was icy as your feet walked across the tile to the shower. It had a frosted glass sliding door with a silver trim, and it squeaked when you opened it. The tub was bone dry, and dusty. You turned the handle to the red zone and waited a few minutes until the water started getting warm. Soon enough, steam filled the air.
After you got in, the hot water actually kind of hurt. You assume it was because you had been cold so long, so you lowered the heat and settled for warm water instead, to thaw your body first before boiling it. The water made your cuts sting, and you hissed through your teeth at the sensation. At least the tension in your muscles you didn’t even realize was there started to ease. You sighed, and relaxed into the water, knowing it wasn’t going to last long enough. You washed your hair and yourself, paying special attention to your injuries.
You got out, dried yourself, took out the first aid kit, bandages and antibiotic cream and got to work. It took a little contortion to get all the spots on your torso, minus a couple on your back. You pondered for a second to ask Optimus to help you with those hard to reach ones, but you then swatted that thought away, with the slightest blush on your face. You decided not to wear the hiking clothes until when the two of you left to get back on the road. They were too heavy to wear inside, so you decided to wrap the towel around yourself and handwash your old clothes in the sink. The areas where you had gotten injured had holes and tears in them, obviously. After removing all the crap on them, you sprained them really well, and walked out into the room to hang them up by the heater. Optimus was still asleep, and he had rolled over to one side.
You sat down on the bed, still wearing the towel, wondering if you should sleep like this or not, especially next to Optimus. You got on your tip toes and looked outside the small window. it was darker than usual, but still not completely nighttime, and my god, still snowing. You walked around the room, and decided to at least put on the thermal pants, and keep the towel wrapped around your torso. Your injuries also needed to breathe after being insulated for days. You sat back down on the opposite side of the bed, and started to feel very sleepy, your previous exertion was catching up with you. You stopped thinking about it too much and pulled up the blankets towards you. So what if he saw you topless the next morning?
The two of you almost died in this motherfucking climate, and the Autobot base was gone. Megatron blew it to hell. The team and the kids were scattered throughout the planet. Darkmount was literally sitting in the Jasper desert. The Decepticons…didn’t win, but certainly hit the team hard.
You started recalling everything that had happened in the past few days like the recap in the beginning of a TV show. Everything changed so quickly. It almost didn’t seem real. One moment you’re in the base, watching the Autobots talk about the Omega Lock being destroyed, clearly seeing the hope of ever seeing their planet with life again fading from their eyes. Then, your own world is crumbling around you, and you find yourself barely alive in the middle of a snowstorm in the arctic with Optimus. You immediately went into survival mode, and had to move, so you didn’t really have time to think about what the fuck just happened. Now here you were, safe for now, warm and fed, and did your thoughts come back to slap you.
You laid down, and looked up at Optimus, and gently draped one of the blankets over him too, he probably didn’t need it, but he deserved one regardless. You can’t even imagine what he’s thinking, the emotions and thoughts that must be running through his processor. He just went through a devastating defeat, and now he had to worry about your own survival too. Your mind flashed the image of his worried optics looking at you through the blizzard.
He was afraid. Maybe not just for you, but for what this meant for the war. He was a leader, and like any, he had to remain calm, and hold his ground despite the turmoil in his spark. You wanted to comfort him somehow, make things better. He was more than just your guardian. He had become closer, something you couldn’t describe. You saw a lot of yourself in him, but also appreciated the things about him that were so different. Yes, he was Optimus Prime, but he was still a person.
For some reason you started to cry. Perhaps it was the isolation, or the situation. The prolonged stress you endured was probably starting to manifest now. Your heart ached for him, for the team, for the children, for Fowler, for June, for everything right now. It quickly overwhelmed you, and you accidentally let out a quiet sob.
Optimus opened his optics and lowered his optic ridges.
“Are you alright?” he asked, in a voice so soft you have never heard him use before.
You scooted closer to him and replied.
“Sorry I woke you.”
“Do not apologize.”
“I’m just…”
“I understand.”
You looked at him for a second. He then brought a servo to your arm and gently rubbed it.
“Thank you for the blanket, you must rest now, you require it. We must depart tomorrow. We will prevail and overcome this time of uncertainty.” He reassured.
“I have faith in you, Optimus.”
“I know.”
With that, you finally let yourself succumb to exhaustion, closed your eyes and went to sleep.