Chapter Text
ROSE: Did you have a productive talk with Karkat?
DIRK: I think it went alright.
ROSE: I take it he gave you the proverbial shovel talk?
DIRK: Pretty much, yeah.
DIRK: But I get the impression that’s the best I could hope for from him at this point.
ROSE: It very well might be.
DIRK: That’s fine by me.
DIRK: He’s understandably very protective of Dave, and even more wary of me.
DIRK: If anything, I think he was doing me a real courtesy, sharing his plans to garrote me in my sleep if I slip up.
ROSE: Oh lord, did he tell you that's what he'd do?
DIRK: Not in so many words.
ROSE: Haha!
ROSE: Was it more words?
DIRK: I’m not sure I follow.
ROSE: I’m asking if you got a thorough verbal dressing down.
DIRK: Oh.
DIRK: Absolutely.
ROSE: Good.
ROSE: ...
ROSE: Dirk, I’m going to let you in on a secret.
ROSE: Consider it a familial welcoming gift.
DIRK: I will consider it nothing else.
ROSE: Excellent.
ROSE: This is it: Karkat is not going to murder you in your sleep.
DIRK: You don’t think so?
ROSE: God no.
DIRK: I’m liking this secret.
ROSE: I thought you would.
DIRK: So he wasn’t actually threatening me.
ROSE: Oh no, he most certainly was.
ROSE: With every fiber of his being.
ROSE: However...
ROSE: I’m sure you’re aware that trolls have a certain... reputation for violence.
ROSE: One that is no doubt perpetuated by your own personal experience.
DIRK: You mean the one in which they effectively eradicated my species.
ROSE: That’s the one, yes.
DIRK: Yeah, it’s pretty bold as opening salvos go.
ROSE: It is.
ROSE: But as with any group, I’m sure you can appreciate that the many parts do not always reflect the shared impression of the whole.
DIRK: You’re saying Karkat’s not synecdochal of his species.
ROSE: I’m saying I once watched him tear up because the coffee machine stopped filling his cup at just the right level.
DIRK: Oh.
ROSE: As if it “knew and understood” him.
DIRK: Wow.
ROSE: He was emotional for the rest of the day.
DIRK: That is... really something.
ROSE: It was a sight to behold.
DIRK: Huh.
ROSE: To be clear, I’m not implying that Karkat isn’t protective of Dave.
ROSE: In fact, if anything were to push him over the edge into actual violence, I imagine it would be if he felt Dave had been wronged or hurt somehow.
DIRK: I see.
ROSE: All I’m saying is that as grating as Karkat’s bark can be.
ROSE: And god can it be grating sometimes.
DIRK: Heh.
ROSE: It is significantly worse than his bite, which is effectively nonexistent.
DIRK: Huh.
DIRK: And here I thought this was gearing up to be a lesson against xenophobia and stereotypes.
ROSE: Oh, I presumed that was a given.
DIRK: Yeah.
DIRK: I’m cool with that being a given.
ROSE: Cool.
DIRK: ...
DIRK: Am I also to take as a given that buried underneath this insistence that Karkat won’t kill me if I hurt Dave, there’s a tacit understanding that you will?
ROSE: Well it’s hardly tacit anymore now, is it?
DIRK: Heh.
DIRK: I guess not.
DIRK: I really blew up your spot.
DIRK: Sorry about that.
ROSE: That's alright.
ROSE: It’s considerably more effective this way.
DIRK: Mmm.
ROSE: ...
ROSE: Actually, all spoken unspoken threats to your personal well-being aside...
ROSE: I did have an ulterior motive in speaking to you.
DIRK: And what’s that?
ROSE: I’d like to get to know you.
DIRK: Oh.
DIRK: Does that really qualify as “ulterior?”
ROSE: Hm.
ROSE: Perhaps not.
ROSE: I hate to admit it, but my motives behind this conversation might be, at their core, decidedly “terior.”
DIRK: Yeah, let’s just leave the ults out of it.
ROSE: Hahaha!
DIRK: What’s so funny?
ROSE: I’m not sure.
DIRK: Um.
ROSE: It’s just...
ROSE: For a split second that struck me as something that, under different circumstances, would be a particularly hilarious thing for us to say.
DIRK: What circumstances are those?
ROSE: Honestly?
ROSE: I have no idea.
DIRK: Well that’s a little unsettling.
ROSE: Not really.
ROSE: I get flashes of things like that sometimes.
ROSE: Possible future and alternate paths.
DIRK: Really?
ROSE: Mm.
ROSE: I’m more than used to it by now.
ROSE: It comes with the Seer of Light territory, I’m afraid.
DIRK: Well shit.
ROSE: Eh, it’s not debilitating.
ROSE: I’d liken it to an intense moment of déjà vu.
ROSE: Just in the opposite direction.
ROSE: And with more... thematic weight.
DIRK: Well I’m the Prince of Heart, so by that logic I should occasionally be overtaken by bouts of desire to remove people’s souls from their bodies.
DIRK: And... lounge around eating turkey legs, I guess?
ROSE: Is that really the association?
DIRK: The turkey leg?
DIRK: No, that was a reach.
DIRK: That’s more king imagery, if I’m being honest.
ROSE: Ha!
ROSE: I was referring to the removal of souls.
DIRK: I know.
DIRK: As far as that’s concerned...
DIRK: Supposedly, yes.
DIRK: I was told once that it was a possibility.
DIRK: It’s too bad our aspects aren’t reversed.
DIRK: Then you could hold my soul ransom to protect Dave.
ROSE: While you would be tortured with occasional bouts of mild déjà vu.
DIRK: It does have a more just ring to it.
ROSE: Oh dear.
ROSE: I’m afraid these threats against you are becoming less tacit by the minute.
DIRK: Yeah, but I’m the one making them now, so it’s okay.
ROSE: Ha!
DIRK: ...
DIRK: We seem to be talking a lot about Dave.
ROSE: Yes, well.
ROSE: He is somewhat our common denominator.
ROSE: How much did you talk about him with Karkat?
DIRK: He was... almost exclusively all we discussed, to be honest.
ROSE: Well then.
DIRK: ...Conversation did drift in a Mayorly direction for a while.
ROSE: I trust you had only good things to say.
DIRK: I... did not.
ROSE: Oh no!
DIRK: Yeah, I fucked that up pretty impressively.
ROSE: One does not talk shit about the Mayor.
DIRK: Believe me.
DIRK: I’ve been told.
ROSE: Ha!
DIRK: But you wanted this conversation to be about the two of us.
ROSE: Well, yes.
ROSE: If that’s alright with you.
DIRK: Of course it is.
ROSE: I held back from approaching you at first, because Dave had obvious precedence.
ROSE: And then I felt Karkat superseded me, as well.
ROSE: I don't know if that’s actually true, but it seemed appropriate.
DIRK: Family dynamics are a bitch, huh?
ROSE: I wouldn't really know.
DIRK: Me neither.
ROSE: Mm.
ROSE: ...I’m slightly worried I’ve woven a tangled web of social rules here, purely for the sake of imagining myself in some overwrought period drama.
DIRK: ...
DIRK: You got in before the Mayor, at least.
ROSE: Ha!
DIRK: And I’ve been told that guy is a riot.
ROSE: He really is.
DIRK: Does he talk?
ROSE: No.
DIRK: Huh.
ROSE: He is an impeccable listener, though.
ROSE: You should introduce yourself.
DIRK: He’ll be next on the list.
ROSE: Heh.
DIRK: Are we going to have to keep up this carefully crafted period drama web for all our future conversations?
ROSE: God, I hope not.
ROSE: By all accounts we’re effectively immortal.
DIRK: Yeah, that would probably get old.
ROSE: I believe with immortality most things do.
DIRK: Heh.
DIRK: Is there any particular way you envisioned us using our carefully allotted first conversation?
ROSE: Honestly?
ROSE: No.
DIRK: Oh.
ROSE: That’s not to say I haven’t thought about it.
ROSE: In fact, I very seriously considered compiling a list of questions for this eventual encounter.
DIRK: Only considered?
ROSE: Yes, I stopped short.
ROSE: I realized I had no idea what to expect from you.
ROSE: What sort of topics to engage in.
DIRK: That doesn't fall under the Seer of Light purview?
ROSE: Unfortunately, no.
ROSE: Or maybe fortunately.
ROSE: If I could chart every interaction it would make for fewer social blunders, but much less interesting conversation.
DIRK: So you’re flying blind now?
ROSE: Apart from what Dave’s told me.
DIRK: ...Oh.
ROSE: Yes, that was another thing.
ROSE: I was certainly interested in meeting the man Dave described.
ROSE: But potential conversational topics kept showing a tendency to veer toward the...
ROSE: Um.
DIRK: ...Accusatory?
ROSE: Er.
ROSE: Yes.
DIRK: That’s okay.
DIRK: I figured as much.
ROSE: But I feel we’ve already beaten that horse into adequate submission.
DIRK: Have we?
ROSE: For now, yes.
ROSE: I’m more interested in you.
DIRK: So am I.
ROSE: You’re interested in yourself?
DIRK: Ha!
DIRK: That is a very loaded phrase, considering how many external versions of myself are flitting around.
ROSE: Oh my.
DIRK: But no, I meant that sentence to be a pure and simple, reflexive-free reversal of your own.
ROSE: In which the pronoun remains unchanged yet takes on an implied new antecedent?
DIRK: Exactly.
DIRK: I would have clarified, but it’s such a well-worn comedic path, I didn’t feel the need to.
ROSE: Yes.
ROSE: Let’s give that path a rest.
ROSE: Allow the grass a chance to regrow.
DIRK: Small birds will build their nests in it, safe from predators long since driven away by that low-hanging, self-effacing attempt to come off as flustered and endearing.
ROSE: A beautiful vision of the future.
DIRK: Is that reverse déjà vu I smell?
ROSE: Probably. It’s a funny mix of ozone and lavender.
DIRK: That’s exactly what I’m picking up on.
ROSE: Well then it must be true.
ROSE: :)
DIRK: ...
DIRK: :)
ROSE: What are you interested in knowing about me?
DIRK: Well...
DIRK: Seeing as I’m technically your father, I could always express a profound squeamishness with, yet simultaneous overbearing concern for your love life.
ROSE: Ha!
ROSE: Yes, well you’ve already met Kanaya.
DIRK: Only briefly.
DIRK: Oh shit.
DIRK: Should I talk to her before the Mayor?
DIRK: Where does she fall in your great Downton Abbey-esque scheme?
ROSE: Downton what?
DIRK: Oh.
DIRK: Wait.
DIRK: Of course.
DIRK: That started in 2010.
ROSE: Ah.
ROSE: After my time.
DIRK: Well shit.
DIRK: I’d like to say I’ve never had a cultural reference fall flatter, but...
ROSE: Ha!
ROSE: Can you give me a brief abstract?
DIRK: It’s a tv show.
ROSE: I gathered.
DIRK: It’s pretty much like the thousand other BBC flavored period dramas you probably had in your head as reference earlier.
DIRK: Only this one was in some immutable way more accessible to and resonant with American audiences.
DIRK: It was a little bit of an international sensation.
DIRK: Or you know, a sensation in relative terms, when your main point of reference is fuckin’ Upstairs, Downstairs.
ROSE: See, that one I do know.
DIRK: Yeah just imagine that but with better lighting.
ROSE: Haha!
DIRK: More Seer humor?
ROSE: No.
ROSE: I just thought for sure you were going to say “with better teeth.”
DIRK: I would never stoop so low as to make a British teeth joke.
DIRK: I have more creative integrity than that.
ROSE: That’s very admirable of you.
DIRK: Thank you.
ROSE: Of course, both shows are British, aren’t they?
DIRK: Yeah, but the Downton cast did have pretty perfect teeth on the whole.
ROSE: Maybe that’s why it was such a success overseas.
DIRK: That may very well have been its secret.
ROSE: Heh.
ROSE: I’d like to hear more about it sometime.
DIRK: I mean...
DIRK: I have a drive with a while not exhaustive, pretty fuckin’ extensive collection of Earth film and television.
ROSE: I take it Downton Abbey is on there?
DIRK: Both “canon” seasons and the third that was never aired but pieced together from found footage by Hugh Bonneville and two rogue ITV cameramen and released on the Dark Web.
ROSE: Well how could I possibly resist that?
DIRK: I don’t know... season three is pretty tragic.
DIRK: You can really sense the air of hopelessness the writers felt at the new world order.
ROSE: Oh no.
DIRK: No, wait.
DIRK: I’m not going to say anything else.
DIRK: It's best if you don’t see it coming, in my opinion.
ROSE: Then say no more.
ROSE: I’d like to go in with my mind unsullied.
DIRK: Excellent call.
DIRK: And anyway, even if you decide it sucks, we can revel in the knowledge that there’s no more perfect way for a gay father and his teenage daughter to bond than by watching Downton Abbey together.
ROSE: I don’t know...
ROSE: Do you have Sixteen Candles?
DIRK: ...
DIRK: I do have Sixteen Candles.
ROSE: Hmmmmm.
DIRK: God, you're right, that’s a real tossup.
DIRK: That’s a tough fuckin’ call.
ROSE: I suppose the only thing for it is to try both, then.
DIRK: See which feels more culturally cathartic?
ROSE: Exactly.
DIRK: We’ll have to make a tradition of it.
ROSE: We can take extensive notes.
DIRK: Publish our findings.
ROSE: Start a semi-annual academic journal.
DIRK: Get it peer reviewed.
ROSE: ...I’m being completely serious about this.
DIRK: So am I.
ROSE: Excellent.
DIRK: ...
DIRK: I feel like we still haven’t talked very much about ourselves, here.
ROSE: Hm.
ROSE: If it’s any consolation, I feel as though this conversation is filling in quite a few mental blanks I’d been harboring, oblique though it may be.
DIRK: Same.
ROSE: Good.
DIRK: Maybe that’s enough.
ROSE: Maybe...
ROSE: I can understand how it might fall a bit flat, however.
ROSE: So why don’t I give you an abstract?
DIRK: About yourself?
ROSE: Yes.
ROSE: Then you can compare it to what you know about the iteration of myself you grew up aware of.
DIRK: Sure.
ROSE: And you can do the same.
DIRK: That seems only fair.
ROSE: Great.
DIRK: You wanna start?
ROSE: It was my idea, after all.
DIRK: It was.
ROSE: Alright.
ROSE: My name is Rose Lalonde.
DIRK: Checks out so far.
ROSE: Ha!
ROSE: I grew up in far Upstate New York with a detached and troubled mother whom I’ve since come to forgive in some ways and resent in new ways.
DIRK: Mm.
ROSE: I’ve been what I would call “in love” twice.
ROSE: Once with Emma Watson.
DIRK: Really?
ROSE: Oh yes.
DIRK: Well okay then.
ROSE: That made for a very intense and formative few months when I was twelve.
ROSE: To such an extent that I think it earns the right to be elevated above the sundry other crushes and infatuations I’ve experienced.
DIRK: I think that’s fair.
ROSE: Thank you.
ROSE: The other of course is Kanaya.
ROSE: I fell in love with her words first, long before we met face to face, which the romantic in me can’t help but liken to lovers of long ago when the world was larger, writing perfumed letters across vast distances, perhaps never to meet.
ROSE: ...
ROSE: Karkat has informed me that's also the plot of You’ve Got Mail.
DIRK: Oh my god.
ROSE: Yep.
ROSE: Sigh.
ROSE: Anyway.
ROSE: When against all odds we met in person, she exceeded my every expectation.
ROSE: We fell in together almost immediately.
ROSE: Of course I realize the options for the past three years were... limited.
ROSE: Confined as they were to my brother, two men, and two other women who, while they’ve come to be my friends, base their romantic attachment on a certain harshness that still occasionally unnerves me.
DIRK: Plus the Mayor.
ROSE: Oh my god.
ROSE: That’s right.
DIRK: Never forget the Mayor.
ROSE: You're learning fast.
DIRK: Thank you.
ROSE: Yes, anyway.
ROSE: Even though it was the most logical for Kanaya and I to come together, it never once felt forced, or like settling.
ROSE: Rather, I felt she and I were destined to be together, and those few other people came along by chance.
ROSE: Which, before you ask, I fully recognize as unconscionably selfish.
ROSE: Don’t worry.
DIRK: Wasn’t worried in the slightest.
DIRK: So, you believe in destiny?
ROSE: That is quite the thing to ask a Seer of Light.
DIRK: I guess it is.
ROSE: But your question still stands, I assume?
DIRK: Yeah.
DIRK: If you don’t mind it standing, that is.
ROSE: I don’t.
ROSE: I’m the one who brought it up, after all.
ROSE: And it’s an interesting question.
ROSE: ...
ROSE: ...
ROSE: Up until this point, I’ve experienced varying levels of awareness of an Alpha Timeline,
ROSE: And I would say that, yes, that timeline was destined to happen, one way or another.
ROSE: The question of whether “I,” as in this particular consciousness that’s driving these words right now, would be the one to experience that inevitability...
ROSE: That, I believe, has a murkier answer.
ROSE: One that comes down, in the end, purely to chance.
DIRK: So you believe that what happened had to happen, but which iteration of “you” would experience it was completely arbitrary.
ROSE: Pretty much.
ROSE: Yes.
DIRK: Had The Prestige come out yet in your time?
ROSE: Yes, it had.
ROSE: That’s not a bad supporting source for this idea.
DIRK: Good thing we’ve both seen it.
ROSE: It is.
ROSE: Heh.
DIRK: So, you mentioned “up until this point.”
DIRK: Does this understanding not apply to us anymore?
ROSE: I don’t believe it does.
ROSE: It’s still early, so who can say.
DIRK: But?
ROSE: Yes, there was an implicit “but” there.
DIRK: I’m very good at picking up on implicit buts.
ROSE: Ha!
ROSE: My implicit but is...
ROSE: I think we might be well and truly beyond “what has to happen” territory, now.
ROSE: We’re simply in a state of “what is happening.”
ROSE: These iterations of ourselves are still here entirely by chance, but we can finally stop worrying about whether it’s “right” or not.
ROSE: Or whether we’ll be wiped out by Paradox Space for the crime of incidentally existing in a time and place that’s “wrong.”
ROSE: We can just be.
DIRK: That sounds pretty fuckin’ nice.
ROSE: It does.
ROSE: ...
ROSE: I’m realizing I may have drifted slightly off topic at the end, there.
DIRK: That’s alright.
ROSE: Good lord.
ROSE: I set out with the explicit task of describing myself, and all I did was wax poetic about my girlfriend and the nature of existence.
ROSE: I’d say the closest I got to personal truth was when I admitted to my Hermione Granger sexual awakening,
ROSE: But I have a sinking feeling that experience might be a dime a dozen.
DIRK: Hahaha!
DIRK: God, don’t worry.
DIRK: I feel like I know you much better now.
DIRK: Hermione sexual awakening and all.
ROSE: She had this pink hooded sweatshirt in the third film.
DIRK: Haha!
ROSE: I’m not sure what it was about it...
DIRK: The heart wants what it wants.
ROSE: Indeed.
DIRK: I was more of a Voldemort guy myself.
ROSE: You’re kidding.
DIRK: ...
DIRK: Yeah, I am.
ROSE: Damn.
DIRK: Sorry.
ROSE: Ha!
DIRK: So I guess that’s the cue for me to tell you about myself.
ROSE: I suppose so.
ROSE: Feel free to drift into a meandering meditation on the justice of the multiverse.
ROSE: Or not.
ROSE: Whatever strikes your fancy.
DIRK: Don’t worry.
DIRK: That will probably strike my fancy at some point.
DIRK: Many points.
DIRK: In fact I can pretty much guarantee I’ll get a little obsessed with it.
ROSE: I look forward to it.
DIRK: But since we’ve already covered a lot of that territory, maybe I’ll just stick to the basics.
ROSE: That’s perfectly fine.
DIRK: Okay.
DIRK: My name is Dirk Strider.
ROSE: I knew it.
DIRK: Ha!
DIRK: Lets see...
DIRK: I grew up all alone in the middle of the ocean, in an apartment furnished by...
DIRK: Dave’s alt self.
ROSE: Yes, my older self did something similar for Roxy.
DIRK: Right.
DIRK: Exactly.
DIRK: So you know all about that.
DIRK: Um.
DIRK: Everything I know about human culture, I learned from the internet.
ROSE: I think that might be a bumper sticker.
DIRK: I think it might be.
DIRK: Just need to get myself a car to put it on.
ROSE: Did you learn how to drive on the internet?
DIRK: In theory.
ROSE: Ha!
DIRK: Obviously when I say “the internet,” I mean that in the broadest sense possible.
DIRK: That includes everything from The Dead Sea Scrolls to The Elder Scrolls, and from Downton Abbey to the Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff Oeuvre.
ROSE: I’m sorry.
ROSE: The what?
DIRK: Oh damn.
DIRK: That's definitely going on our watchlist.
ROSE: Will it fit our research model?
DIRK: SBAHJ is suitable for all situations.
ROSE: Well alright, then.
DIRK: Let’s see.
DIRK: Taking a cue from your earlier soul-baring...
DIRK: I’ve been in love once.
ROSE: But not with Voldemort.
DIRK: Heh.
DIRK: No.
DIRK: Not with Voldemort.
DIRK: Um.
DIRK: Someone a little less fictional.
DIRK: And...
DIRK: Closer to home.
ROSE: ...Jake?
DIRK: Boy, those sure are some powers of deduction you’ve got there.
ROSE: I mean...
ROSE: It seemed the only logical option.
DIRK: Yeahhh.
DIRK: I don’t honestly know what’s going on there.
ROSE: Would you like to talk about it?
DIRK: Not really.
DIRK: Sorry.
ROSE: That’s fine.
ROSE: This is the time for basic facts, after all.
DIRK: Yeah, well my ability to fuck things up with Jake is pretty fuckin’ basic, let me tell you.
DIRK: ...
DIRK: But no.
DIRK: Let’s...
DIRK: Not.
DIRK: Do that now.
ROSE: Whatever you like.
DIRK: Ha.
DIRK: Yeah, sure, let’s get real fuckin’ basic.
DIRK: Pure essentials.
DIRK: I like horses.
DIRK: I like robots.
DIRK: I like rap.
DIRK: I like building things, working with my hands.
DIRK: I’d call myself an intellectual, if people who did that didn’t have a tendency to be goddamn fucking awful.
ROSE: Ha!
DIRK: But maybe that’s fitting.
ROSE: I think I can relate.
DIRK: Yeah?
ROSE: Oh yeah.
DIRK: Heh.
DIRK: That’s reassuring.
ROSE: It is.
DIRK: Well shit.
DIRK: Now I feel like I’ve overshot and told you too much about myself with that rapid-fire fuckin’ list there.
ROSE: Hm.
ROSE: I’m not sure “I like horses” really qualifies as oversharing.
DIRK: Ha.
DIRK: Yeah, maybe not.
ROSE: But purely for the sake of restoring balance to the force,
ROSE: I’ll offer up, free of charge, the fascinating, highly revealing tidbit that I like cats.
DIRK: Wow.
DIRK: You’re sure I don’t owe you any money for that?
ROSE: Positive.
DIRK: Your generosity knows no bounds.
ROSE: It is my fatal flaw.
DIRK: Haha!
ROSE: ...
ROSE: I’m also partial to eldritch horrors.
DIRK: Okay.
DIRK: Now that might actually be a little bit revealing.
ROSE: Yes, and as such, that piece of information does not come free of charge.
DIRK: Oh shit.
DIRK: How far in debt am I?
ROSE: I’m afraid you owe me one episode of this sensational Upstairs, Downstairs knockoff.
DIRK: That’s a steep price.
ROSE: Yes, well, my boundless generosity only bounds so far.
DIRK: I think I can afford it, though.
ROSE: Excellent.
ROSE: ...
ROSE: I’m glad we did this.
DIRK: Me too.
ROSE: Even if you never did tell me which Harry Potter character sparked your burgeoning sexuality.
DIRK: Oh my god.
DIRK: That’s...
DIRK: Actually kind of embarrassing.
ROSE: It’s alright.
ROSE: We’ve made a lot of progress here today.
ROSE: You don’t have to tell me.
ROSE: Be aware, however, that I am going to assume it was Dobby the House Elf.
DIRK: Sigh...
ROSE: Oh my god, was it??
DIRK: No!
DIRK: It...
DIRK: ...
DIRK: It was Ron.
ROSE: Ron.
DIRK: Yepp.
ROSE: I’m not going to respond to this information immediately.
DIRK: Okay.
ROSE: Instead I’m going to mull over it for a while.
DIRK: Totally fair.
ROSE: And get back to you at a later date with my diagnosis.
DIRK: I understand.
DIRK: There's a lot to unpack there.
ROSE: Thank you for trusting me with this, Dirk.
ROSE: I mean that.
DIRK: We’re family, Rose.
DIRK: I’d trust you with anything.
ROSE: Likewise.
DIRK: :|
ROSE: :|
DIRK: ...
ROSE: ...
DIRK: ...
ROSE: ...
DIRK: ...
ROSE: ...
DIRK: ...
ROSE: ...
DIRK: Hahahaha!
ROSE: Hahahaha!