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Chapter Text

Bruce buried his fingers into soft dark hair, eyes closed as he parted his lips to allow the other man to slide his warm and velvety tongue inside to deepen the kiss. Clark's arms were around him, his strong yet gentle hands caressing and gripping any part of his body they could reach. They were well past the hesitant and light kisses and touches by now, and Bruce only wished he had taken off the suit before this started. At least the cowl and gauntlets were gone.

He couldn't even remember who initiated this, and while a distant part of his mind told him that should bother him, Bruce couldn't find it in himself to care. 

At that moment, it only mattered that Clark was there, and he was kissing and touching him.

They had to break apart for air far too soon- or at least Bruce did, so Clark's mouth made a hot and wet slow trail downward until he ended at the juncture where neck met shoulder, alternating between kissing and nipping at the pale skin and making Bruce tighten his grip on the kryptonian's shoulders in a desperate attempt to remain upright while he continued trying to get enough air into his lungs.

It was the delicious pressure of Clark's thigh sliding between his legs that made him freeze. Bruce had to bite back a moan as he clumsily pushed Clark away.

"What's- What's wrong?" Clark asked, brows knitted together and his red and swollen lips pursed into a little pout.

Bruce took a shaky breath as he stared at Clark. There was barely a sliver of blue in his smoldering eyes, his skin flushed and perfect and Bruce wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around his neck and pull him close again. He wanted to kiss him and pour everything he couldn't say with words into that kiss. He wanted to get lost in the feel and taste of Clark until the part of his brain that insisted they shouldn't be doing this was drowned by the part that just didn't care.

It was one of the hardest decisions he had ever had to make, and even when he opened his mouth to speak Bruce wasn't sure of what was going to come out until he said the words.

"Clark- You have a girlfriend."

"Lois."

Bruce would have been amused by the utter shook on Clark's voice and expression as he said her name- but not this time. Not when he saw guilt and something he didn't dare put a name to twist Clark's perfect features half a second later. The kryptonian took a step back, and then another, and Bruce could only feel the knot in his stomach tighten.

"I- God, you're right. You're- I don't-" Clark cradled his face in his hands. "I'm so sorry, B. I didn't-"

"I know. This was a mistake." It was a lie. This could never be a mistake for him, but Bruce forced the words out anyway because hear Clark say them instead was something he couldn't endure. He just couldn't.

Clark met his gaze again, pain and sorrow reflected in his azure eyes. Bruce looked away.

"That's not- B-"

"You should go," Bruce said gruffly as he turned his back on him. He could felt Clark's eyes on his back, could even tell the moment the kryptonian took a step to cross the short distance he had put between them before stopping.

Bruce allowed himself to squeeze his eyes shut and bow his head only after he felt his cape billowing slightly with the displaced air caused by Clark's departure.

The next time they saw each other after that incident was only two days later during a regular Justice League meeting.

Bruce felt Clark's eyes on him several times during the meeting but stopped trying to meet his eyes after the kryptonian looked away the first couple of times he looked back at him.

They didn't address each other at any point and didn't even stay behind to talk after the meeting like they usually did. They didn't even walk together toward the zeta tube because Superman flew out of the room as soon as Diana declared the meeting adjourned.

Bruce left the room a moment later, ignoring the curious glances sent in his direction.

Two more weeks passed, and they still hadn't talked about what happened. Or about anything else, for that matter, since they hadn't even seen each other since the awkward meeting.

Bruce wasn’t even sure at that point if it was Clark who was avoiding him or if it was the other way around, but what he did know was that things couldn't continue like that. Still, he did nothing to change that.

When the day of their previously scheduled shared monitor duty came, Bruce entertained the idea of asking someone else to cover for him for all of two seconds before reminding himself he wasn't allowed to let personal matters interfere with his work. So he prepared himself as best as he could and went to the Watchtower.

He was half expecting someone else to come in Clark's place, so he had to hide his surprise when the kryptonian floated into the monitor womb.

"Hey, B."

He grunted in answer without taking his eyes away from the monitors before him, forcing his heartbeat to remain steady as Clark moved closer to take the seat at his side without another word.

Bruce enjoyed the silence. It was no secret among the people who truly knew him that he preferred silence to idle chatter. He had always found comfort in silence, and he liked being able to share it without having to worry about things turning awkward or physically feeling every time the person with him stopped themselves from saying something. 

He never had to worry about that with Clark. The kryptonian had always enjoyed their companionable silences, and sometimes it was Clark who needed them.

This time was different, though. This time the silence was thick and tense, filled with too many unspoken words hanging between them. 

Bruce wished more than anything that he could change what happened. It didn't matter how much he enjoyed kissing him and being so close together, or how many years he had wanted to experiment it. He never would have changed his friendship with Clark for that stolen moment of passion. That was the reason he never told Clark how he felt. He will always choose to have Clark in his life as friends than not having him at all. 

He would never forgive himself for letting things get to this.

With every minute that passed, the dread Bruce felt grew. He simply couldn't bear the possibility that this was how his relationship with Clark would be from now on, but he didn't dare say anything for fear of making it worse.

"Lois and I broke up," Clark blurted out eventually, still not meeting his eyes.

Bruce closed his eyes slowly, grateful for the white lenses of the cowl that kept them hidden. Of course, he ruined Clark's relationship. He always destroyed and tainted everything he touched because he didn't know how to do anything else. And, of course Clark knew that. He knew it was Bruce's fault too and that was why he had been distancing from him. It made perfect sense.

"I- uh. I told her what happened- what almost happened between us and well, that was it."

"Why."

"I'm not sure I understand."

"Why did you tell her."

"Because she deserved to know. And because I couldn't stop thinking about it," Clark admitted after a pause, a soft blush dusting his cheeks.

"How did she take it," He asked hoarsely after a long moment, even though he knew he had no right to ask.

"She- She was hurt and she was angry. Mostly hurt, I think, but we sat down and talked after I told her what happened and I think she understands somehow. And hey, at least she doesn't hate me," He added with false cheer, his smile looking pained and strained.

Bruce hesitated for a long moment before taking off his cowl. He owed it to Clark to take responsibility for what he caused. "I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to apologize for. You even stopped me before I did something worse," Clark's self-deprecating smile slip from his face a second later and was replaced by an expression of horror. "Not that doing something more would have been wrong! Except it kind of would have because I had a girlfriend but I-"

Bruce raised a palm to stop his rant. "I understand what you mean."

"Oh. Good. I just- I'm grateful you stopped me because I don't think I would have been able to forgive myself if I had done something like that to Lois."

Bruce didn't dare admit that was the only reason he put a stop to things that night. The truth was he wouldn't have minded sleeping with Clark even though he knew the other man was in a relationship. At that moment he had been willing to take what he could get and never ask for more, but Clark was different. Clark was a good person, and he wouldn't have been able to accept something like that. His reason to stop anything else from happening that night had been selfish. All because he couldn't take the risk of things changing between them. Of Clark seeing a mistake every time he looked at him, or seeing guilt and regret reflected in his eyes. 

Bruce had known Clark wouldn't be able to handle it, and that was why he stopped him.

"I know."

Clark smiled. "Of course you do. I can always trust you to watch my back even when you shouldn't have to." 

He didn't let Clark's fond smile or gentle words distract him from the truth. "This is my fault."

"What? That's not-"

"You and Lois love each other, and you would still be together if I hadn't intruded."

"I love Lois and she loves me too, and I'm sure we would still be together if we were truly meant for each other. And if I didn't have feelings for you too." Bruce could do nothing but stare at him. Clark smiled lopsidedly. "You weren't expecting that, were you? Even after the way I jumped you the other day."

"You have feelings for me," Bruce repeated, a need for confirmation and a request to expand on that all rolled into one.

"I do. I think I've had a crush on you since the moment we met, and then I got to know you and that crush turned into something more," Clark admitted with a sheepish smile. "I didn't do or say anything because I never thought anything could happen between us. I mean, I didn't even know you liked men until we kissed that day.

"It got easier with time to accept we could be friends and nothing more, so I was able to put those feelings aside and move on, but they never did go away."

Bruce tried to wrap his mind around the fact Clark felt something for him- had felt it for years now, and that if only one of them had dared to speak up they could have been together. 

"What about you?" Clark asked tentatively. "I know it's not easy for you to talk about this kind of stuff, but I-"

"I- it's the same for me," Bruce admitted, dark gaze focused somewhere behind Clark's right shoulder.

Clark's answering smile when he dared to look at him again was blinding, almost as bright as the shine in his beautiful blue eyes. Bruce forced himself to look away, his whole face burning. 

"What happens now," He asked, having had to clear his throat before speaking.

He deflated slightly, making Bruce tense up. "Now I have to ask you to wait."

"What."

"I'm- I really like you and I want nothing more than to give this thing between us a chance, but I know I can't do it now." Clark looked as if it physically pained him to say the words. "My relationship with Lois just ended and I just don't think I'm ready to enter another relationship so soon. You deserve everything and I can't give you that right now. I know it's not fair-"

"Okay."

"Okay?" Clark asked uncertainty.

The corner of Bruce's lips twitched into an almost imperceptible wry smile. "I spent years trying to come to terms with the fact nothing could ever happen between us. What makes you think I wouldn't be willing to wait now that I know there's a chance it may happen."

"Really?"

"Have you ever heard me say something I don't mean," Bruce asked with an arched eyebrow.

"Right. Sorry. I just can't believe this is happening."

"Me neither," He admitted, his voice only loud enough for someone with superhearing to pick up on it.

Bruce almost jumped when he felt Clark take his hand and squeeze it gently. He didn't take his gaze away from Clark's eyes even when the kryptonian brought his hand to his lips and kissed his covered knuckles. His heart beat faster at that moment and he could have sworn he felt the warmth of Clark's lips even through the thick material of his gauntlet.

He wanted- no. He needed more than that. He needed Clark's lips on his bare skin, his touch on every inch of his body, and that hungry look in his eyes. But more than anything Bruce wanted to be allowed to get close and show him how much he loved him- except he couldn't. Not yet.

Bruce was going to be patient and wait as long as he had to wait to have all of Clark to himself. For now, he settled for caressing Clark's cheek with his thumb and watch as his sparkling eyes fluttered closed.

Chapter Text

Epilogue - X Months Later.

"Mister Kent is here to see you, sir," Alfred announced politely, standing in the doorway of the study after Bruce called for him to come in.

He looked up with a frown, the report he had been reviewing forgotten on top of the pile of reports awaiting his attention on the large mahogany desk. 

It wasn't unusual for Clark to visit the Manor, of course. Most of the time he called ahead or asked before showing up, but other times he liked to surprise him like now. What was unusual, however, was the fact Alfred decided to announce him this time, and that the older man was actually waiting for a response from Bruce before letting him in. 

His frown deepened further when he met Alfred's eyes. The man's expression was impassive as always, but there was something different in his eyes. It wasn't bad exactly, just different. Bruce found he wasn't able to put an exact name to it. It was something close to amusement, but not quite. Maybe fondness as well.

"Alright," Bruce finally answered with a touch of wariness in his tone. He rose to his feet when the butler gave him a short bow, and after a moment's pause walked around his desk to greet the kryptonian.

It took only a couple of seconds for Clark to appear at the door, and as soon as he did Bruce's eyes were drawn to the item he had brought with him. He supposed that explained the strange look in Alfred's eyes. As he forced his heart back to his normal rhythm, Bruce could only hope the Kryptonian hadn't been listening in. 

"Hey, B."

"Clark," He replied in a tone that didn't sound as casual as he had wanted it to.

"I hope I'm not interrupting."

Bruce forced himself to tear his eyes away from the thing in Clark's hands and raised them to meet the other man's azure eyes. "I- no. I was just reading some reports."

"Ah," Clark said with a small, lopsided smile. "Then I guess I arrived just in time to save you from them."

"Hm."

For some reason that small sound made Clark's smile widen- not that Bruce saw it since his gaze had drifted downward one more time.

"These are for you," Clark announced with a tentative smile as soon as he closed the distance between them. The words made Bruce's eyes flick to his face for a wordless moment before looking down at the flowers the other man was holding out.

Bruce had never received flowers. He was usually the one sending flowers, or well. Rather it was Alfred sending them in his name. The only person he had ever given flowers to was his mother. She had always loved any kind of flowers, and he recalled with a strange clarity several instances when he picked up small flowers and plants around the Manor's gardens for her when he was a boy. He remembered Alfred once even helped him cut some roses from the rose garden for her birthday. 

After his parents' death, Bruce had done his best to ensure there were fresh flowers in her tombstone and his father's as well. He should visit soon and bring her some.

Clark was still waiting, so he reached for the bouquet with careful hands and looked down at the beautiful yellow sunflowers arranged together with some small purple flowers he didn't know the name of and large green leaves.

"Thank you," Bruce said politely, just like he was supposed to when he received something.

"You're welcome," Clark replied with an amused twitch of his lips. "I hope you like them."

"They are fine." As soon as the words were out of his mouth Bruce wanted to take them back. Was that truly the answer Clark deserved after bringing him of all people flowers? A simple 'fine'. He wanted to apologize but wasn't sure if that would just make it worse.

"I, uh." Clark rubbed the back of his neck. "I don't know what your favorite flower is, but I didn't think you'll want something too colorful so I picked these. I like sunflowers, so I hope-"

"It's fine. I- I like them."

Clark's blinding smile was back in a second. "That's good."

Bruce duked his head slightly, his hands tightened around the bouquet. Should he put it down now or would that be considered rude? He didn't know what the appropriate etiquette in this situation was. Maybe he should go ask Alfred to put them in a vase. Flowers needed water, after all. Except it didn't feel right to just leave Clark here.

The other man cleared his throat, making Bruce lift his head again. Clark's beautiful eyes were soft and gleaming.

"I'm glad you like the flowers because they come with an invitation."

"Oh?"

"Yes. It's an invitation to go on a date with me."

Bruce blinked at the other man. "Now."

"Yes? Alfred told me you weren't working on anything pressing today, so I thought it was a good moment. I promise to get you back home in time for patrol," Clark added with a teasing smile. 

It was at that moment that Bruce went back to a detail noticed before but had pushed aside, too focused on the flowers. Clark wasn't wearing one of the unflattering and frankly ugly suits he used for work. The navy suit before him wasn't tailored to fit Clark's body perfectly, but it was a good suit nevertheless. Of course, the fact Clark was wearing something special for their possible date was more important than the way he looked. Mostly. It looked great on him.

"I understand if this isn't a good time after all. We can-"

"No!" Bruce's mouth snapped shut as soon as he saw Clark's surprised look. "I- Of course I want to. I just- You know you didn't have to do any of this. I was going to say yes no matter where or how you asked."

Clark's smile turned tender and soft. "I wanted to do it. It's our first date, after all."

"It is," Bruce confirmed, a soft smile pulling at the corner of his lips.

He had to resist the urge to avert his eyes as Clark stared at him, overwhelmed by the love and affection on Clark's expression. Bruce wasn't sure he deserved it, but even that feeling didn't stop his chest from feeling full and warm.

"Can I kiss you?" Clark asked after a moment of silent staring, a soft blush dusting his cheeks.

Bruce's only response was to turn his back on him. When he turned around after leaving the flowers on his desk he caught a glimpse of the hurt expression on Clark's face before it was replaced only half a second later by a tentative hopeful look.

He wasted no time with words or any other response. Instead, Bruce crossed the short distance between them, meeting azure eyes for a second before his lips touched Clark's.

It was a soft kiss. Slow and tentative. It was a beginning and a promise.