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Unlikely Competition

Summary:

You’re not the only one who’s been practicing pick up lines.

Notes:

sorry that it's been a minute since the last one. school was really busy this past week!!
MC is gn!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

You’ve been laying off the pick up lines for the last week and a half. Not because you had run out of them, you definitely hadn’t, but your last encounter with Simeon, like Levi’s, was… unsettling, to say the least. You felt like Simeon had told you something that you weren’t supposed to know, and now you didn’t know what to do with that information. These pick up lines were putting you into more hot water than they were worth, and you decided to finally lay the idea to rest. And that’s exactly what you did. However, the universe was not your friend, and if the universe wanted you to do something then it would surely get its way. 

The first time you felt it was in the library. You looked up from the textbook you were reading from to see Satan sending you a weird look from across the library. Before you could even ask him what the matter was, you felt an icy stare on your back, the type that made the hairs on the back of your neck stand. However, when you turned around to investigate, you saw no one there. You glanced back at Satan, but the demon only shrugged and went back to his own book. “I don’t want any part of this.” 

The second time it happened was at RAD. You felt the cold glare again when you were in the middle of a conversation with Belphegor and Beelzebub in the cafeteria. The twins were chatting across from you while you picked at the food on your tray. Your eyes widened slightly and you visibly stiffened when feeling attention on you. You quickly spun around in your seat, however, much to your dismay, no one was there. 

“You okay?” You turned back around at Belphie’s question, a sheepish smile on your lips. You probably looked like a basket case. 

“Ah, I thought I heard someone call my name.” You scratched at the back of your neck as you lied. As well as not being observant, you also weren’t a very convincing liar. “I must’ve imagined it.” Belphie looked at you with a quirked eyebrow, though he didn’t press on the topic further when Beel asked for your roll. You were in the middle of handing over your roll when Satan and Leviathan sat on either side of you. You felt your cheeks instinctively redden when glancing over at the third eldest demon. You had to play it cool. “Levi.” Your mind blanked again. “H-Hey.” You choke a little. Nailed it. You turned away from the purple haired demon before he could respond, staring at Satan with a forced smile. “Hey.” The blond looked at you with a raised eyebrow and only shook his head in response. 

The third time it happened was in the middle of dinner. You were listening to Asmodeus and Satan gossip about a student from school when you felt the cold glare settle over you, the sudden feeling causing you to choke on the food you had just put in your mouth. Satan’s hand comes down firmly on your back, the brothers all looking at you with a concerned look. You blinked several times after swallowing the pesky food. 

“What in the Devildom just happened?” Lucifer asked from behind you with his hand gently soothing down your hair.You hadn’t even noticed him getting up from his seat. “Are you alright?”

“It’s really bad for your skin to choke like that. You probably just took a few years off your lifespan.” Asmodeus comments from your right.

“Thanks for the concern.” You breathed out as the tears formed from your choking clung to your lashes. 

“Humans are so fragile.” Beel said to no one in particular while he swiped Levi’s food when he wasn’t paying attention. 

And now you’re here, locked in your room by the orders of Lucifer for nearly dying over dinner. After scolding you for not resting enough, he sent you to your room for the night. With nothing to do, you let your mind drift towards the icy stare you kept feeling for the last several days. You had started to wonder if the stress of finals were finally getting to you, or if you had actually managed to piss off one of the brothers. You couldn’t recall any of the demons acting any different around you, but admittedly you also weren’t the most observant person in the world. With your bottom lip tucked between your teeth, your eyebrows furrowed together as your mind racked through all the possibilities. 

You sat up slightly when a knock came from the other side of your door. “Come in.” A wide smile tugged at your lips when your favorite white haired demon stepped inside. “Mammon!” You had just started to get out of bed to hug the man, but paused halfway through when seeing the look he was giving you. Ah, so that’s who’s been glaring at me the last week… “Why are you glaring at me like that?” 

“I’m sorry for makin’ ya choke at dinner.”

“Uh… it’s okay..?” Your head tilted to the side while you stared at him with a confused expression. Why was he apologizing if he was still seemingly upset with you? “But why are you glaring--”

“I’m tryna do somethin’, stop starin’ at me because it’s makin’ me nervous!” You felt another smile tug at your lips and you sit yourself back down on your bed. 

“Is that why you’ve been glaring at me all week? You know, that was really creepy at first. I could literally feel your gaze on me, you know.” 

“Yeah, well…” Mammon’s cheeks instinctively reddened as his eyes avoided you and changed his gaze toward the floor. “That’s because I was tryn’ to approach ya!” 

“When have you ever had an issue with approaching me?” 

“Because--!” His eyes widened slightly after nearly giving himself away. “Just… listen.” You shot him a suspicious look but stayed quiet anyway. “Let me tie your shoes.” 

“Uh…” You glanced down at the fuzzy socks you had on. “I’m not wearing--”

“--Because I can’t have ya fallin’ for anyone else.” 

Your eyes widened in realization and you pointed a finger at him. “You’re trying to beat me at my own game that you somehow managed to talk me into in the first place!” You rambled out without taking as much as a breath. 

“S-Shut up! I’m not! But it took me near a damn week to come up with that!” He shouts in his defense, arms crossed across his chest. A week? Well, that’s unexpectedly cute. “A-Anyway,” Mammon awkwardly clears his throat, “I don’t really know much about the human realm, but I know this is a line, I think. Are ya from Tennessee? Because you’re the only ten I see.” 

You stared at the demon who’d been practically glaring a hole into the floor the entire conversation, his face redder than it had ever been. “I wish I were cross-eyed so I could see ya twice.” 

“I’m no photographer but I can picture us together.”

“If you were a chicken, you’d be impeccible.” 

“Are ya a bank loan? Because you’ve got my interest.”

“Life without ya is like a broken pencil. Pointless.”

“Did you invent the airplane? Because ya seem Wright for me.”

You blinked several times, a blush creeping across your cheeks and over the bridge of your nose. “You came prepared.” You comment dumbly. 

“Did you- did ya like them?” His hands are stuffed into his pockets and for the first time since he came in, his gaze met yours. The focused glare is gone and replaced with a softer expression. “It turns out this shit is harder than it looks.” 

You snorted quietly and tapped the empty spot beside you. “I’ve been trying to tell you that it’s harder than it looks.” A bashful Mammon takes a seat next to you, both of your faces equally as red. “That was really cute, Mammon.” 

“Cute?” He whipped his head in your direction and stared at you with a fallen expression. “Just cute? Ain’t it supposed to woe ya or somethin’?”

“Oh shoot, I’m sorry. Let me- Mammon ! I’m so wooed right now! Catch me while I throw myself into your arms!” You shouted dramatically before throwing yourself into a flustered Mammon’s arms. 

“T-This ain’t the time to be jokin’ around!” Pushing yourself off, you get stopped halfway through only for Mammon to pull you closer, his face redder than it was before. “I didn’t say I wanted ya to stop though.” He huffed under his breath. 

“Mammon, you can throw pick up lines my way whenever you want, you know that right? We’re partners in crime, remember? I’d never judge you for that.” You reminded him happily as you nuzzled your face into the side of his neck. “But can I say something?”

You felt him inhale nervously as he glances down at you. “What?”

“Never stare at me like that again or I will come after you.” 

“A-Ah, wait-- ya don’t have to word it like that--”

Notes:

hey guys! my friend code for obey me is 1390683109 and i have a satan profile pic if you wanna be friends! :D i send ap every day LOL
i'll be working on barb & dia next, and i have an idea for mammon's birthday. drop any suggestions or requests if you have any :)

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