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It had been a particularly harrowing escape from the clutches of the marine warships descending on Wano. They were on day 3 of their flight, and just beginning to breath easy. Easy enough that Sanji felt ready to return to his kitchen to cook hot food again. It had been a whirlwind of tossing out meals that could be eaten with one hand while the other clung to rain soaked ropes.
It would be his first time cooking in the kitchen since he last waved goodbye, and his knees almost buckled at the sight of it. The kitchen, his kitchen, was immaculate, not even a speck of dust lingered on the long table and every pan and spatula was exactly where he left it. Tears collected at the corners of his eyes, and he gasped a little when a floating hand appeared on his shoulder. He turned, wiping his eyes hastily, but found himself still blissfully alone, not even the shrieking of a familiar ravenous captain interrupted his thoughts.
They knew; his rambunctious, zany, beautiful family of a crew knew he would need a moment to reacquaint himself with his favorite room in the whole wide world. He gave the ghostly hand a gentle squeeze of thanks before rolling up his sleeves. He would make them the biggest victory feast this side of the Grand Line.
He was even feeling generous enough to hand deliver the plate of afternoon snacks. He tried to tamp down the sudden stab of anxiety as he climbed the familiar rope ladder. He hadn’t gotten the chance to be alone with the green haired swordsman since that fateful day. He hadn’t gotten to voice the words that had begun to demand his attention now that peace was on the horizon, for a short while at least.
Half formed sentences whirled around Sanji’s head as he finally poked his head through the hole in the floor.
“Yo marimo, snacks read-“ Sanji stared slack jawed at the shambled remains of the crows-nest.. He took in the hundreds upon hundreds of slashes crisscrossing the walls in no apparent pattern. His eyes finally landed on a familiar green head, “W-what happened?” He couldn’t believe that Franky would let his precious Thousand Sunny get into such a state of disarray, especially in contrast with the immaculate state of his own kitchen.
“Nothin’,” the grunted response floated up. Sanji felt the vein in his forehead pulse as he stomped over to the prone man, plate of onigiri still perfectly balanced on his flat hand.
“Answer the damn question, moss ball,” Sanji raised his leg up, and sent it back down in a terrifying arc straight for the green head, stopping just centimeters away from the one eye now staring menacingly up at him. He placed his foot down awkwardly, watching as the swordsman finally sat up.
Unease snaked through him as he stared at Zoro’s broad shoulders, as familiar to him as his own palm. How many times had Sanji been entrusted to protect that scarless back? He shifted his weight anxiously, the lines along the walls were an eerie mockery to the controlled man sitting before him. What would make Zoro destroy his own home? What could have been so terrible.
“Oi”, he nudged the shoulder with his foot, suddenly terrified of the answer, but knowing he needed to hear it more than anything else in the world. Sanji would wait, he could learn to be patient, couldn’t he? He’d certainly failed at running away.
The sun light casting shadows across broken floorboards was the only indication that time was passing at all. Finally Zoro turned, as if pushing against some invisible force, until one eye was trained on the blonde chef.
“You left…”
Your crew, your nakama, your ship, your home
Me
The unspoken words seemed to expand in the heated air between them. Sanji opened and closed his mouth a few times. All those words he practiced alone in his room at Big Mom’s lurked somewhere outside his vision. He had written them all down one time, but somehow even seeing the I’m sorry scratched out in his own shaky handwriting made it seem too real. He had thrown it in the fire and lite his cigarette as he watched each page curl.
What was there to apologize for when there were no promises to begin with? Just barbed words and angry gestures and the feeling that he had somehow ripped his heart out of his chest when he left.
He wasn’t sure when he realized where his abandoned heart resided. Was it when he faced the ridicule of his family again, wondering what his fathers face would look like slashed by a white hilted sword? Was it when he came face to face with his beautiful bride, only to feel a stark ambivalence? Or was it when his crew finally burst onto the island and there was only one name that repeated on his breath as he scanned his nakama.
Zoro, Zoro, Zoro
He had an entire monologue to recite for him, and yet all that came out now were a string of paltry syllables.
“I had to” he muttered, breaking off the searing gaze to stare out the window. His eyes caught on a albatross struggling to stay aloft on the gusty wind. Zoro gave a derisive snort before following Sanji’s gaze out the window.
“Did you know that sailors believe that killing an albatross is bad luck, they say the birds carry the souls of dead sailors.” Sanji put the plate carefully on the floor before pulling a cigarette from his pocket, lighting it with practiced hands. He waited until the stick was half finished before continuing, “I wrote you a letter you know.”
“Whad’it say.” The swordsman grunted back after a heartbeat.
“It was a goddamn novel.”
“Tell me the most important part.”
“Don’t forget me.” Sanji didn’t hesitate to answer, the calming haze of nicotine made it easier to see the pages in his mind, “I didn’t mean to write it at first. Then before I knew it, I had filled an entire page with just those three words.” He didn’t move as he watched the swordsman rise out of the corner of his eye.
“Not fucking good ‘nough.” Zoro was still angry, hurt sharpened his features into something feral. His hands, free for once of swords, were stuffed tightly into his pockets.
“They say an albatross’ heart beat is the same flying as it is resting on the ground,” Sanji's smile was forced, eyes still watching the bird, “their hearts only exert effort when they land and when they take off. Often times, it puts so much strain on the heart to land that they choose to just keep gliding and gliding, far longer than most birds.”
Zoro just remained standing there. Waiting, waiting. Always waiting while Sanji always ran.
“It’s hard to land, marimo. Hard to land and call a place home. Easier just to glide and glide,” Sanji felt the pressure behind his eyes, the thickness coating each word, “Easier on the heart.”
Sanji didn’t look as he heard boots stride over, felt the strong arms encircling his waist as a heat pressed against his spine.
“But you did,” the breath on his neck sent his pulse raising, “You landed already, didn’t you? Isn’t it easier now to just stay and rest”
Sanji felt the tears prick his eyes as he dropped his head back, letting it lean against strong shoulders.
“Isn’t it enough?” Zoro’s voice was quiet, curving his head down as Sanji’s shoulders shook underneath him.
“I’m sorry,” Sanji huffed through tears, “I’m sorry.”
They stood there gently entwined long after both of their legs went numb.
“Look,” Zoro said softly, nudging the blonde’s cheek with his head. Sanji followed Zoro’s finger, feeling his breath catch in his throat as the albatross glided lower and lower until it came to perch on the branch of an orange tree. It shook its feathers briskly before snuggling down against the growing cold of the night.
Sanji turned and gave the grinning swordsman a watery smile. A strong hand moved to his chin and suddenly he was breathless, chapped lips pressed firmly against his. He turned slightly, sliding his hand over the expanse of strong muscle before tangling his hand in the short green hair. He felt the dangerous hum that rippled through Zoro, felt the promise of so much more because it was enough. He was enough.
And he was finally home.
“MEAAAAAAAT”
They broke apart with a gasp, turning with twin looks of horror to watch their brilliant mess of a captain wrap his rubber hands around the bird.
“LUFFY, NO” they shouted in tandem, lunging towards the open window. Before they could even reach the frame, an elongated stick smacked down on the black haired boy.
“PUT IT DOWN, ITS UNLUCKY TO EAT AN ALBATROSS,” Nami yelled, all pointy teeth and red faced rage.
“Yooo-ooooo~” Brook ambled, “A fellow guider of souls! Nami, show it your panties for good luck~”
“ABSOLUTELY NOT”
“God Usopp will protect this ship!! Oh w-w-wait h-how is that b-b-ird so b-b-ig?!?!” A nasal tone joined the cacophony
“HANDS OFF MY DINNER”
Ghostly hands suddenly wrapped around the poor bird, prying it gently from the captain’s clutches. Snarls and yells followed the floating bird, stopping only when its clawed feet latched onto the window sill next to the gaping men.
“I think he will be safer up here, Zoro-san, Sanji-san” The ghostly voice gave a soft chuckle before releasing the creature, “I’m sorry to disturb you.” The words dissipated with a knowing lilt.
Sanji's face was burning, but Zoro leaned forward, one eye glowering at the bird who was glaring indignantly back at him.
“…wonder what it tastes like.”
A resounding smack echoed through the ship.
“WHAT WAS THAT FOR SHIT COOK-“
“IDIOT MARIMO DONT EVEN JOKE-“
“Do you really think asking the albatross to land made Zoro feel better?” Chopper turned to Nico Robin who was still smiling as she lowered her crossed arms.
“I believe so, Chopper.”
They both stared up at the crows nest, watching as the tangle of arms and legs pressing angrily against each other fell out of view.
“Shall we make some dinner,” Robin held out her hand and Chopper took it happily, “I believe our dear cook will be busy for the night.”
And so the Straw Hat Pirates ate artfully carved vegetables and rice, giddily locking eyes with one another when every few minutes or so a soft laugh drifted down on the breeze.