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Over everything else, Mebh had wanted to hold a grudge. How couldn’t she? In the span of just a few hours, Robyn had proven herself to be the worst friend imaginable.
She had abandoned her in the woods and had left her waiting for ages. She had known about what had happened to her ma and had kept it from her. She had betrayed her and sold her out to a bunch of foul, bloodthirsty kids…
But she had saved her mother.
Underneath the setting sun, a hazy crimson glow had washed over everything Mebh knew and loved. Robyn had arrived on Móll’s back just as the moon rose steadily in the sky and Mebh had turned her back on her without batting an eye.
“I was only tryin’ to keep you safe,” Robyn had said softly, and her voice had wavered, trying to maintain a steady tone. “Tryin’ to help.”
“I didn’t know what else to do. I’m sorry, Mebh.”
Mebh wanted to be bitter and selfish, to hold a grudge and to hate Robyn. After all, it was what she deserved; her promises had all fallen flat and she had only come to Mebh when it benefitted her.
But just one look at Robyn, with flushed cheeks and eyes glazed over with tears, and she couldn’t. Mebh had tried to bite back a grin- she’d give herself that, if nothing else- and then the smile had spread and she had thrown her arms around her. All at once, the bitterness in her heart had softened, melting away.
“Oh, come here to me, townie!”
At that moment, everything had been perfect. The rising moon that rose steadily in the still-warm sky, Robyn in her arms, her blonde hair tickling Mebh’s cheek ever so slightly and hands soft against her shoulders, and her mother standing over them, emerald eyes proud and tail wagging and-
Within a minute, the world as Mebh knew it had come crashing down and she felt as if she were drifting through some sort of dream. An arrow flew through the sky and Móll went crashing down onto the floor, a pained whimper escaping her. The wolves had yipped, Robyn had gasped and Mebh had screamed.
It was a raw, hoarse scream, one that came from the deepest part of her chest, where her voice cracked in the middle of it and briefly, she remembered her father, caught by the first of the soldiers to show up in Kilkenny and never to be seen again. Her father was gone, gone forever, and now her mother was gone in the same way, and oh, god, her ma was gone and suddenly Mebh was sitting upright in the back of a caravan, her heart pounding rapidly inside her chest. She clutched her arms and squeezed her eyes shut, breathing slowly and rhythmically, attempting to contain the dread spreading faster than she could breathe it away.
Outside of the caravan, grey clouds hung low in the sky, accompanied by high winds and a steady drizzle. Móll and Bill had left the girls behind- told them to get a good night’s rest, promised them they’d be back after surveying these new woods- but now, being unsure of where her mother was left Mebh feeling uneasy. The sight of her mother lying still on the floor, green eyes hollow and lifeless before she disappeared altogether in plumes of golden lights, was still fresh in Mebh’s mind, and despite her attempts to remain silent for the sake of the girl sleeping next to her, a sob escaped her.
Robyn shifted, turning to face her. “... Mebh?” She asked, her voice soft but raspy as she sat up and rubbed her eyes. Mebh relaxed when she felt Robyn’s hand on her shoulder, still sniffling. “Are you alright?”
“Me ma…”
“Your ma’s alright.” Robyn scooted closer to her, adjusting the blanket to better cover the two of them. “You heard what she and my father said, right? They’ll be back by sunrise. They’re just surveying the forest and makin’ sure it’s good enough for the pack.”
“And what if they’re not?” Mebh lowered her hands, looking over to her friend. “What if there's hunters out here?
Robyn tensed. “That won’t happen. There’s nobody out here for miles, anyway. I haven’t seen anything since we left Kilkenny. No houses or anybody.” She explained, tucking a loose strand of auburn hair behind Mebh’s ear. “They’ll be okay. You’ll see.”
“... I had a dream about me ma.”
“Well, good thing it was just a dream, right?”
“It was so real, Robyn.” Mebh shook her head, her voice wavering as she leaned into Robyn’s touch. “I saw it again. When yer dad shot me ma… I felt like it was happening for the first time again. I saw her hit the floor, I saw her die, I…”
Mebh trailed off as tears began to prick the corners of her eyes and she squeezed them shut, letting them fall. They were hot against her cold skin and she turned to face Robyn, burying her face in her chest. “I’m so scared, Robyn.”
“... I know.” She said softly, wrapping her arms around Mebh. “It’s not right, but we’re safe now. No more hunters, no more soldiers. No more Cromwell.” She said, cupping Mebh’s face and wiping away a tear with her thumb. Mebh looked up to her, placing a quivering hand on top of hers. “There’s four of us, now.”
For someone who had been through so much in such a short amount of time- although, truth be told, all of them had- Robyn was strong. Maybe not physically, no, anything but, but the past events had been heavy on her. Robyn’s life had been turned completely upside down and she had willingly given up everything- her home, her father, her safety- for a girl she had just met and her mother. Despite the times she had wanted to be bitter or selfish, Mebh was thankful for Robyn and everything she had done for her. She was glad she was a part of the pack now, glad she’d never have to say goodbye.
She leaned into Robyn’s touch. A long strand of sandy blonde hair hung loosely in front of her face, stark against her pale skin. She had long since taken note of how Robyn watched her, full of adoration, but only now had she noticed the way her expression reached into her eyes, as if Robyn saw something in Mebh that only she alone could make out. Being this close to her made Mebh realize just how safe she felt with her, as if her presence alone could prevent anything bad from ever happening again, even if she couldn’t explain these emotions just yet.
“There’s four of us,” Mebh echoed, reassuring herself as she closed her eyes. Robyn wiped away the last of the tears that still remained, brushed away loose strands of hair and then pulled Mebh close, pressing a kiss to her forehead. Before she could say anything or properly process this gesture of affection, Robyn’s arms were around Mebh again and her head was against the blonde’s chest. Mebh sighed, the beginnings of a smile creeping onto her face as she listened to her heart race, wrapping her arms around her.
In that minute, thousands of words had gone unspoken… but Mebh had a feeling they’d have all the time in the world to say it.