Chapter Text
Ronan Lynch was a dreamer. He could create objects in his dreams and take them out, and if he dreamt it correctly, his objects would be near perfect replicas of the real thing, like an orange camaro, shining and imperfect like it's original. Sometimes, Ronan brought things back when he didn't mean to, like a dream creature and a mask.
Tonight Ronans dreams were taking him where they pleased. Tonight he was dreaming of the still hot roads of Henrietta at night, of the dark fields on their side of the roads, of the only light that far out from town being the headlights of the BMW and a white Mitsubishi and the traffic light serving as marker for when to kick the idle beasts into gear and slam the accelerator. He dreamt of bitter words spit back and forth across the way and the sly smiles and smirks that filled the silences as they waited for the lights to turn. He was dreaming of the feeling of hands on him, the smell of gasoline and cigarette smoke curling around him and settling into his clothing, marking him with evidence of where he was, who he was with. He dreamt of smoke filling his lungs and the taste of alcohol on his tongue. He dreamt of two laughs curling around him like arms, he dreamt of whispered words and the hum of an ancient car that loved it's owner too much to give up.
Ronan woke up before his body did. It no longer sent him into the panic it used to, now he just rode out the agonizing time while he was awake and his body was still asleep. After a bit he was able to sit up properly and he took a deep breath and looked down at his clenched hand. It was a perfectly unassuming white box, no larger than his hand. Ronan shook the box and heard something shuffle inside it, it sounded familiar. He finally opened the box and smiled fondly at the contents; four neat rows of pastel coloured cigarettes. The pastel was an interesting touch but they didn't feel wrong, the colours fit the item in a way that Ronan didn't know how.
Ronan stared at the box in his hands for a while longer before grabbing his phone, thumbed through the screens and hit Adams' number.
“Who died.”
Ronan rolled his eyes and fell back on the bed, fiddling with the box. “No one,” he said flatly, “took something out of a dream.”
There was silence on the other end of the line for a moment. “On purpose?”
“No, I didn't mean to take them, just woke up with them in my hand.” He said and took one of them out of the package, studying them carefully. They were delicate colours, this one a soft yellow, that reminded him of Gansey’s yellow polos.
“Is gansey awake?” He asked in a tone that Ronan knew meant that Adam was planning something, he was both suspicious and intrigued.
“Probably, why?”
Adam made a noise Ronan knew was accompanied by a shrug that was trying too hard to be casual. “Ask him to try them with you.”
Ronan froze, Adam quickly filled the silence. “Come on Ro, you know I’m okay with anything happening between you guys, and I know that other than me you don't trust anyone else to watch over you.”
Ronan considered his words, he had a point. Damn him. Ronan sighed and lifted the yellow stick up to his eyes again, just staring at the yellow colour and feeling the curl of all the memories of Gansey wearing the shirt that matched it.
“Fine, if this goes south it's on you.”
Adam gave him a laugh from the other side of the phone, and Ronan smiled softly at the ceiling. “You have permission to do whatever you want with him, but remember what we discussed.”
Ronan hummed softly. They had discussed this before, bringing Gansey into their relationship. It was no secret that Ronan adored the boy, the one who provided so much love it overflowed from him, the boy who took care of all of them and made sure that they were provided for and let them love him back. It had come as a surprise to Rona thatAdam also felt the same for Gansey , that he also loved him so much. In hindsight it shouldn't have been a shocker to him that they both loved Gansey as much as they did, afterall, he was the one that brought them all together and held them together, tight as glue and safe as life.
Ronan tucked the cigarette back in the package and rolled out of bed. He exited his room and stepped into the living room/Gansey’s room of Monmouth. Ronan stood in the doorway and watched Gansey lay in his bed for a while. He was awake and staring at the ceiling, and Ronan watched as the early morning sun washed over his bed and made it look like the comfiest place on the planet.
He cleared his throat and walked over to him, flopping down in bed next to him.
“Good morning Ronan.” Gansey muttered, his voice was still heavy from sleep, which meant that he had managed to get some sleep.
“I dreamt these up,” he said and tossed the pack onto Gansey’s chest, “Adam suggested we try them together.”
Gansey sputtered a little bit and sat up, staring at him. Ronan reached over and grabbed his wireframes, handing them over.
“Look at them, they're fucking pastel. ” he said and grabbed the package, opening it.
Gansey just stared at him for a bit, lips pursed and Ronan was preparing to hear the fatherly voice he used from time to time when he needed to enforce rules. Gansey sighed and nodded.
“Yea, okay, let's do it.”
Ronan raised an eyebrow but didn't argue. “Stay.” He muttered and left to get them a lighter. This was going to be a fun time.
A few minutes later they were both back in Ganseys bed, still in their pyjamas, and we're currently choosing one of the cigarettes in the box. Ronan went for the yellow one he’d been toying with before and Gansey chose a salmon coloured one. Gansey held out his cigarette and Ronan lit it for him, then lit his own.
He raised it to his lips then paused. “Do you even—” He stared at Gansey as he took a long practiced drag from it, held his breath for a few seconds then exhaled. Ronan smirked and raised him up to his lips, mirroring Gansey’s actions, gently blowing the smoke up above them.
“Well I’ll be damned, you've done this before haven't you?”
Gansey at least has the descent to flush and look away. “Well of course I have, I traveled around a lot and had to adapt to the culture sometimes, plus we do go to a private school, it was bound to happen eventually.”
Ronan laughed and nodded, laying back down in bed, taking another drag, when he blew out the smoke he noticed it was different than usual smoke, it wasn't while, it swirled with blues and oranges.
“I can't believe model son Richard Gansey smoked before, I feel honoured to know this.” He mocked lightly and looked over at Gansey who was staring at his cigarette with apprehension. Ronan rushed to shove the doubts aside. “Look man, I don't care if you did or not, means I don't have to teach ya, now lay back and relax.” He smiled and pulled Gansey down to lay next to him.
They laid in comfortable silence, content to watching the smoke curl over them. With the silence and the warm body next to him, Ronan let his mind wander. He thought about Gansey in ways he only allowed when far away from the boy, when far enough away from the other object of his affections that he didn't have to worry about acting on them.
Ronan let himself see it, the vividness of the colours, let himself linger on crafting Gansey’s face, it was so clear he could reach out and touch the boy in the driver's seat.
He thought about Gansey in the pig, the windows rolled down, the wind carding it's fingers through his hair gently, the golden evening sun delicately carving out his features and illuminating him, making him glow like he was personally chosen by God, making him look like a king with a crown made of sunlight.
“Wow.” Gansey whispered from beside him, and shifted closer to him, shoulders pressing together. Ronan realised that yes, he could reach out and touch the boy in the memory, because the image was swirling overhead, painted in the smoke he’d exhaled.
“How did you do that?”
Ronan shook his head and started at the slowly clearing memory. “I thought of it.”
Gansey let out a breathy laugh and tapped his cigarette on the cup on the nightstand, it wasn't an ashtray but it made due, Ronan mimicked the action on his cup.
“God, when was this, coming back from my parents house right?”
Ronan hummed softly, watching the barely there image finally clear with the smoke.
“Did you know this would happen?”
Ronan shook his head.
Gansey smiled and nodded, relaxing back in bed. Ronan watched as he closed his eyes and smiled softly, Ronan watched him raise his hand up and then slid his gaze to the rise in his chest when he inhaled and held, before watching his lips as he exhaled. Above them the smoke turned colours, greens, golds and blues swirling until they were both looking at the barns.
There was a spot just outside the view of the main house, in a small grove of tall oak trees, that was almost perfectly shielded from the elements; it was no secret place if you were walking in the direction but that's where he and Gansey would sneak off to when they wanted to be alone, away from family and brothers. Ronan watched the wind blow through the trees, shaking the leaves a little bit, then the sight shifted to himself. The dappled light was making patterns on his skin, the wind was tossing his hair enough to annoy, he watched himself push it back; familiar blue eyes opened and turned to stare at Gansey. In the fading scene he could still see the way the colours brightened and warmed around him. Ronan ached with the thought of possible implications.
“Wow.” Ganseys said with a breathy laugh and looked down at the burned down butt, snubbing it out in the cup of ash. Ronan followed his actions again. They lay there for a short beat, before Gansey sat up and took another two out of the pack and held one out to Ronan, this one was baby blue, Ganseys was pink. Ronan took it and placed it between his lips and sat up, leaning in a bit so Gansey could light his, since he had the lighter. They were sitting close together, their thighs were touching and Ronan wanted to kiss him so bad it was hard to not act on it, especially when Gansey looked so pretty with mussed hair, his wireframes sat pretty on his nose, and a cigarette in his mouth. Ronan smiled and gently blew a bit of smoke at Gansey who let out a small little huff and playfully shoved at him,
Ronan smiled and exhaled smoke again, this time the memory wasn't about Gansey, but Adam. It was him and Adam sat together in the courtyard of Aglionby, Adam was going on about something, Ronan wasn't really paying attention, he was just watching Adam and the animated way he was gesturing, the smile creeping up his face and the way that his hands waved about illustrating his point. He looked beautiful.
“Would it be cliche if I said wow again?”
Ronan smiled and shook his head, watching the smoke clear away. “No, he deserves it.” Gansey hummed and nodded, blowing out some smoke again, these didn't have images, just colours swirling and mixing into the air.
“He’s beautiful, I didn't know you saw him like that.”
I see you like that too, he thought. Ronan looked at Gansey and admired him and the way that the smoke around them softened him, how he looked less like Richard gansey and more Gansey, the boy who loved to drive around and look for dead welsh kings, the boy who loved his friends so much he would do anything for them, the boy who often time fell asleep in his bed with a book on his chest and his wireframes on.
“How do you see him?”
It was a risky question to ask him, since technically him and Adam never brought up the fact that they wanted to include Gansey into their relationship. They both loved Gansey a lot but they weren't sure if he even felt the same for them, which was a possibility very present in Ronan’s mind and the reason why he’s never asked, or even entertained the idea of asking.
Gansey hummed softly and took a long drag from the cigarette between his lips before gently blowing out the smoke. Ronan watched in mild awe as the smoke curled to form an image of all three of them standing at the summit of one of the many Virginia mountains. The sun was setting, colouring both him and Adam in golden and red light; the wind was ruffling Adam's hair and Ronan couldn't help but admit, in a moment of vanity, that they both looked like Gods. The valley spanned underneath them, while painted clouds overhead placed crowns of fiery reds, oceanic blues and brilliant golds on their heads; they both turned to look at Gansey, two pairs of blue eyes - one, a set of crystal, cold and blue, the other set the blue of a newly dawning sky- and as if it were his own memory, Ronan was overwhelmed with the admiration Gansey held in that moment.
The smoke cleared and ronan could breathe again, he took in a short breath of air and looked over to Gansey, who was already looking back, there was a fair flush to his cheeks and he nervously took short drags from the cigaret, the smoke he exhaled in between clouded black with uncertainty. There was a cowardly part deep inside Ronan that warned him not to do what he was about to, but Ronan pushed that part even deeper down and shuffled closer to Gansey. Gansey’s eyes furrowed and took the cigarette in his mouth.
“Let me try something.” He muttered and took a long drag from the cigarette in his mouth, then leaned in and pressed their lips together in a gentle kiss. Gansey opened his mouth and Ronan let the smoke pass from his mouth to Gansey’s.
Gansey pulled away and smiled softly, blowing the smoke out, they watched it swirl and paint what Ronan had seen this morning. Gansey on bed, bathed in golden light.
Gansey turned back to Ronan. They locked eyes for a second and Ronan could see the want and desire in his eyes. Ronan reached out and gently pulled Gansey into him, kissing him again but this time there was no hesitancy, it was needy and hungry, and Gansey replied in kind.
The kiss was heavy and filled with want and desire but it also felt right, it felt like kissing Adam, it felt like something was finally slotting into pace for him and tilting the word into proper alignment. Ronan slid his free hand down from Ganseys cheek to his waist and pulled him closer, nipping at his lips gently and sliding his tongue in when Gansey opened his mouth a little bit. Ronan was pleasantly surprised that Gansey was good at his, he knew he'd had some girlfriends in the past, though they never lasted for much longer than a few weeks to a month.
Gansey pulled away and Ronan watched his face cloud over with shock and a bit of fear as he pulled away like Ronan was an inferno and he'd made the mistake of touching it. A bit of hurt curled up in his chest at the possibility that he’d read this whole thing wrong.
“What the hell, Ronan?” He asked in a voice that was both surprised and angry.
The hurt was growing and twisting into anger, not at Gansey but at himself for even trying. Ronan was about to leave, but Gansey kept talking.
“How can you do that to Adam, you know damn well that this isn't how you go about in a relationship.”
Ronan blinked at him and then laughed loudly, the hurt and anger uncurling in his gut a little bit at the admission. Ronan smiled and lifted the still burning cigarette to his lips taking a drag from it and exhaling yellow smoke that shifted colours in the light.
“Adam and I talked it over, we wanted to know if you wanted to join us.”
Gansey remained quiet. Ronan snubbed out his cigarette and took Gansey’s as well, tossing it in his cup, sitting up to look at him properly.
Gansey stared at him, eyes wide and mouth half open, before he clamped it shut and sat up poking at Ronans chest.
“That is not how you go about that.” He was angry, the emotion was strange on Gansey and Ronan could count on one hand the number of times he’s seen him angry.
Ronan laughed and shook his head. “Is that a no?” He asked in a joking tone, though he knew it was going to be a no, especially after what happened.
Gansey didn't answer and stared back down at Ronan, he was still glaring but the anger was settling more into mild annoyance.
He lifted a hand and cupped Ronan’s cheek, leaning down, kissing him again with the softness of a feather, still a bit uncertain. Ronan cupped his cheek and deepened the kiss a little bit more, pulling Gansey on top of him, pressing their chests together, hands sliding down his sides and tucking underneath his sleep shirt, cold fingers pressing into his warm skin and pushing up. Gansey pulled away and slid his shirt off, tossing it aside before leaning down again. Ronan met him halfway and shifted them so he was on top of Gansey and kissed across his face then down his neck, nipping at the skin occasionally, and sucking bruises on his collar bones. Gansey groaned and reached down to grip at his shoulder and placed a hand at the back of his head, keeping Ronan pressed to his body. Ronan smirked and moved to the side of his neck and bit down, reveling in the groan that echoed around the room.
“Sounds like that went well?” Adam called from the first floor, footsteps getting louder as he made his ways upstairs.
“Amazingly, how was work?” Ronan asked, lifting off Gansey to greet Adam. Ganseys legs squeezed at his sides a little when he pulled away and Ronan rubbed at his thighs gently, humming into Adam's kiss.
“Same as always,” he sighed and dropped his bag, toed off his shoes and joined them on the bed, laying next to Gansey, “But this kind of made it worthwhile.” He smiled and leaned over, tilting Ganseys head to him and kissing him gently. Ronan watched, still rubbing at Ganseys thighs, hands sliding beneath the legs of his sleep shorts, squeezing a little when he let out the prettiest moan.
“So that's a yes?” Adam asked once they pulled apart.
Gansey tilted his head to look at Ronan, and he smiled at him. “Yes.” He whispered. Adam hummed and kissed his cheek, rubbing at his chest. “My two beautiful boys.”