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Tubbo didn’t know when he’d last slept. The Phantom screeches from above told him it had been much more than three days, but he didn’t have it in himself to care anymore.
Every time he closed his eyes, he saw that crater. Every time he blinked, he saw the tower.
There was no body, there were no items left behind, there was no note.
In a way, that was worse. Seeing the mangled corpse of his best friend at the bottom of a hole in the ground would’ve broken him, reading the final words of a broken spirit would’ve haunted him until he breathed his last breath, and picking up the shattered remains of a compass might have finished him off, but at least those things would have given him closure.
Not having that closure made it worse, because there was the smallest part of him that dared to hope. And hope was so damn painful.
They held a funeral. Tommy’s family weren’t there.
Niki said a few words, so did Ranboo.
Tubbo sat by the gravestone long after darkness had fallen, staring up at the Phantoms and the stars in the sky.
“Maybe… I could see you again.” He breathed. “We don’t wear armour in L’Manburg.”
Quackity would make an excellent President. He closed his eyes, letting himself relax to the sound of monsters from above. If that Phantoms didn’t dive, if the sun rose and he still lived, he’d have a resignation note on his desk and his suit on a hanger before most of his friends even woke up. He loved L’Manburg - he’d given everything to serve his country - but he realised now that had been the wrong decision. Whether he was the President or not, whatever decision he’d made, L’Manburg would still be there. Democracy would prevail, the people would elect someone trustworthy, someone with the country’s best interests at heart, it wouldn’t fail without him.
Tommy, on the other hand…
Tubbo had failed him.
“I should have come sooner.” He breathed. Presidential duties could have - should have - taken a back seat. His best friend had been suffering, and he hadn’t known the true extent of his pain until he’d seen… Well. He knew what he’d seen.
“I should never have exiled you.”
When he opened his eyes, he swore there was a new star in the sky. He wondered if that was Tommy looking down on him. Maybe, if he watched the night sky for long enough, he’d find new constellations. Maybe he could name a constellation in Tommy’s honour: Cat or Mellohi. The discs, which had once brought feelings of hurt and betrayal, filled a hole in Tubbo’s heart.
Well, they didn’t quite fill it. Nothing could ever fill a hole shaped like Tommy. But they could hold it together, help it to heal with time.
He wanted to cry. The tears were long since gone.
He heard another screech come from above: the Phantoms were preparing to attack. He found that he was at peace with the idea, that if dying meant he’d be at Tommy’s side once more then maybe, just maybe, it was the better option.
Tubbo slipped further down against the gravestone, taking in one last shuddering breath.
The last thing he heard was Tommy shouting his name.
# # #
He hadn’t had long when he’d seen the Phantoms beginning to descend. Tommy had nothing, had no one, not anymore, but that wasn’t going to stop him. He had a cut on his shoulder from a fight earlier in the night - he’d wrestled with a Skeleton to take its bow - but he paid no mind to how the cold made the wound sting all the more. He just aimed, quickly, and fired as he held his breath.
The arrow struck the Phantom’s wing, Tommy called out to his motionless friend and ran toward him, hoping that he wasn’t too late. With the Phantom making a quick turn in the sky, he didn’t have a chance to check. He didn’t have time to look at anything. He just grabbed Tubbo’s body from where it was slumped against the gravestone - his gravestone - and ran with his friend tossed over his shoulder.
Tubbo was lighter than he remembered.
When he’d started to run, he didn’t stop. Stopping for even a moment would be costly, and if there was even a chance that Tubbo was still alive then he wasn’t going to stop. He would never stop if there was a chance that Tubbo was okay.
“Please, Big T, just hold on a little while longer.” He whispered. “Hold on for me. Please.”
# # #
Tubbo awoke. He wasn’t expecting that, if he was entirely honest. He was certain that the Phantoms circling would have killed him. Then again, he’d never been a ghost before, he didn’t know what that felt like. It could explain what the blinding white light was - although after blinking several times he realised that the blind white light was, in fact, just the sun.
It was day, he was alive, and as he sat up he realised that he was in a strange place that he didn’t recognise. The weather was… Warm. Pleasantly so. And the air was thin, but fresh. He could hear the wind - strong - blowing against the leaves of trees and the blades of grass that brushed against the exposed skin of his hands and ankles. He looked around, side to side, and took in the horizon. He was on top of a hill - a mountain, more like - and in the distance he could see a large body of water. He’d never been here before - never been anywhere like this before - but he decided very quickly that wherever he was, he liked it.
Footsteps approaching from behind were enough to make him turn around, and Tubbo was glad he was still sitting on the grass (and several feet away from the edge of the slope) because he almost passed out again at the sight.
“I’m dead…” He breathed. “This is what death is.”
“What?” Tommy scoffed, raising an eyebrow. “Big T, I saved you!” He laughed. “You really think I would let you die?!”
“But-- But you’re dead!” Tubbo said matter-of-factly, reaching out with a hand to prove a point. He swiped quickly at Tommy’s stomach, expecting his hand to go straight through him. So he was, admittedly, very confused when his hand instead hit Tommy and the younger boy stumbled back several paces, bringing his own hands defensively to his abdomen.
“I saved your life and you repay me by punching me?!” Tommy said - half laughing, half wincing. Tubbo didn’t listen to the words that left his lips, because he was on his feet for a second and he took two long strides to close the gap between them, before his arms wound tightly around Tommy’s shoulders and the force of his hug pushed them both back to the ground. He didn’t give a damn that Tommy let out an oof as his body hit the ground, and he didn’t care at all about the fact that he’d immediately started sobbing against the shoulder of his best friend.
“I- I thought-- The crater, the tower, Tommy you--”
“It’s in the past.” Tommy said, as if that was the end of it. It wasn’t, not in the slightest, but Tubbo would let it slide for a day. Whatever had happened while he’d been gone needed to be discussed at some point, but right now he just wanted to hug the friend he thought he’d lost for good.
“I mourned you.” His voice croaked. “I did this.”
“Dream did this. To both of us. But not anymore. He can’t touch us here.”
“Where is here?” Tubbo whispered against Tommy’s chest, feeling a hand move to his hair and start untangling the knots.
“Far.” Tommy explained. “I found a horse, didn’t have a saddle or a carrot so I just set us on its back and let it run.”
“How far did we go?”
“Far enough that no one will ever find us. We’re safe here. Safe from Dream, from Technoblade, from our past. We’ve got a whole future here.”
Tubbo sat up at that, rubbing the tears from his eyes until his vision was clear enough to take in their surroundings properly. Upon closer, more lucid observation, he recognised that there were atop a mountain in a shattered savanna plateau, high above the rest of the world. Dramatic cliffs surrounding them on three sides, and on the forth was a slowly widening plain that expanded as far as the eye could see. Somehow, there were animals - a few sheep and some chickens - and Tommy looked to have made a start at building a makeshift home for the two.
“What do you say?” Tommy asked. “You and me. Not against everyone else, but with each other.”
“So long as I’m not President.” Tubbo forced out a laugh, and when Tommy laughed too he managed to smile.
“Don’t worry, Baa-salt over there already has that title.”
“You named a sheep Baa-salt?” Tubbo’s laugh was a little more genuine this time, softer, more like his old self.
“I don’t see you suggesting anything better.”
# # #
By the time night fell, the boys had a roof over their heads, beds to sleep in, and the beginnings of a farm. Baa-salt and Wil-baa had taken refuge by the side of their home - not needing a pen to be enticed to remain close when the light of flickering torches kept them safe - and Tubbo and Tommy had gone for a short walk. They’d both reasoned that it was to check out their surroundings and try to light the place up a bit more to keep mobs from spawning, but they’d been taking in the night air and night sky as they’d walked.
It was hard to say that they didn’t miss their homes and their friends: they did, dearly. Tommy even found himself missing Dream, a thought that made him feel sick to his stomach, but one that with Tubbo by his side he knew he could work through.
“I’m sorry I exiled you, Tommy.” Tubbo said. “I thought I was making the right decision.”
“I’m sorry for putting you in the position where you had to make the decision.” Tommy replied with ease, coming to a halt and looking at the view from the cliff on his right. Tubbo couldn’t help but flinch - the fears of Tommy and the tower still too fresh in his mind.
“Sit with me?” Tommy asked, lowering himself to the ground and crossing his legs. Tubbo did as instructed, taking in a breath and looking out at the stars. They were a little more beautiful than they had been the night before.
“See that one?” Tommy asked, pointing off into the distance. “It’s called Corona Borealis. It’s supposed to be a crown that’s given to Theseus.”
“I don’t like that story.” Tubbo whispered. “Theseus dies.”
“Yeah.” Tommy shrugged. “It’s the only constellation I know.”
“We can make new ones, then.” Tubbo said, his own arm raising to point where Tommy had done before. “If you join those stars to the ones above, it almost looks like a circle.”
“Tubbo, you’re shit at making constellations.” Tommy laughed, and Tubbo nudged him in the side.
“I was thinking we call it Mellohi.”
Tommy hummed for a moment, leaning back and propping himself up on his elbows as he stared at the sky in consideration. “Alright.” He said. “Maybe you’re not that bad at it.”
Satisfied, Tubbo leaned back too, and they remained where they were - staring at the sky and naming everything they could see after the things and people they loved - until the sounds of Zombies approaching forced them to retreat indoors.
Tubbo slept peacefully that night. So did Tommy. They had a lot of work to do, and plenty to build, but they had each other. It was them against the world - it always had been, and it always would be.
Everything was going to be alright.