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Caelia sat up straight in her bed, soaked in a cold sweat, despite the below freezing temperatures outside, with the telltale gold glow fading from her irises.
The harsh sound of her panting filled the room, disturbing the silence. She ran a shaky hand through the wet locks that stayed stuck to her nape.
Three days after Arthur had returned to life and Merlin, she started to have a recurring nightmare. And now after more than a month of it, she was just plain exhausted.
Laying back down, she muffled her frustrated scream into her pillow. Then just as suddenly she sat up again and threw the empty vial of sleeping potion at the wall. After watching it shatter with a twisted satisfaction, she settled back down. She knew from experience that sleep would evade her for another hour or two, her brain replaying the last few moments of her dreams as it was.
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The snow was blowing fiercely outside, but the four people inside were exceptionally cozy.
“ Mer lin, what exactly is the purpose of this ridiculous woolly tunic?” Arthur asked, disgust clear in his tone, he pulled the brightly coloured cloth away from his body.
Merlin rolled his eyes as he waltzed into the living room with a tray full of four santa mugs of hot chocolate.
“It’s a Christmas jumper you clotpole, not a woolly tunic. I told you this before.”
“Yes, but this doesn’t answer my question of why I’m wearing one. It’s quite hideous.” the blonde complained.
In the background, unnoticed by both men, Leon and Caelia shared an annoyed look before taking a sip of chocolatey goodness.
“Leo, how did you live with this in the medieval ages? I swear I’ve come close to suffocating on the UST between them.” Caelia grumbled under her breath.
“They were only a bit better back then, especially since Arthur was married. But only just. Drove me mad.” Leon whispered back.
Not that it would have mattered, Arthur and Merlin were still too busy squabbling to pay attention to the others. Caelia rolled her eyes at their antics, before they lit up with a mischievous glint and the telltale golden glow. Leon followed her gaze, over to the sprig of mistletoe hanging above the archway leading into the kitchen, which just happened to be in the path of one oblivious Once and Future King and his equally oblivious warlock.
Leon smirked at his goddaughter as the two men walked right into her trap, sometimes he wonders where Caelia gets her devious ideas from then he realized he’d rather not know.
“Oi mate, might want to look up.” Leon interrupted the continuous bickering.
In sync, Arthur and Merlin both looked up slowly, Arthur’s face filled with confusion while Merlin’s face turned redder than Arthur’s jumper.
“There is a plant hanging above our heads, what about it?” Arthur asked
“That plant is called mistletoe, Arthur, and nowadays we have a Christmas tradition that says two people who get caught under the mistletoe have to kss.” Leon explained, smothering a laugh at the dawning horror on the King’s face.
Of course Leon knew why his old friend was so worried. Not a week after the Once and Future King and his knight reunited, Arthur spilled his guts, both figuratively and literally (unfortunately giving an early end to a rather expensive cashmere rug Leon had), he told his old friend about the feelings he had bottled inside for over a millennium and a half. All of this just happened, conveniently, right after Caelia revealed to Arthur that same-sex relatonships and same-sex marriages were now legal, and Merln had told him about his son and Caelia’s twn brother, and why he doesn’t live with them. Unintentionally overwhelming the poor man with both, the freedom that his feelings are not abnormal or unnatural and the guilt he left Merlin alone to face so much pain and heartache.
Seeing Arthur in such a state, caused both a protective surge and a deep sorrow in the older man. Leon had comforted and explained as much as possible to Arthur. He assured the younger man that he wasn’t unnatural, and no matter what he would always have his family by his side.
And now both idiots were given a prime opportunity to fulfill their centuries long desires. Only one issue remained; they both believed their feelings were unrequited, much to the dismay of Leon and increasing rage in Caelia.
“Guys, don’t be ridiculous, this is Arthur’s first Christmas. He shouldn’t have to participate in a silly tradition.” Merlin stuttered, his face still flaming.
Arthur whipped his head around and stared down the warlock, he may have been dying with mortification, but he will be damned if he let a stupid tradition get the best of him. Silently cursing Leon, he grabbed Merlin by the back of his neck and pulled him down that one and half inches, so close they both could feel the others’ warm breath on their lips. Merlin was doing his best startled stoat impression as Arthur moved closer and brushed his lips across the raven’s.
Merlin felt his magic stir as his eyes closed, leaning closer into Arthur’s embrace. The king moved his lips firmly and tenderly over Merlin’s in a chaste kiss, then Merlin gasped and Arthur slid his tongue into the warlock’s mouth, leading to a very thorough introduction between their mouths, that was steadily becoming more and more desperate. Both men lost themselves for what felt like a moment (but in reality was around five minutes) before Leon coughed politely, reminding them that a) they had company and b) Merlin’s teenage daughter just watched her father snog like a hormonal boy.
Merlin groaned softly, pulling away from Arthur, when he caught sight of Caelia and the shit-eating grin on her face.
Arthur’s eyes opened wide when he heard Merlin's groan, only to do the same himself, after seeing the wicked expression on Caelia’s face. He had seen that face on Merlin too many times and each time it led disaster to him.
“Very good Arthur, I rate that performance at least an eight.” she smirked. Looking far too smug for Merlin’s taste.
“Thank you Cae, but I don’t remember putting up mistletoe here.” Merlin deadpanned, though it was ruined by the fact he was still slightly out of breath.
“That was me, old friend, I thought I would be nice to have a bit of a switch from our normal traditions.” Leon piped up innocently.
“Yeah right.” Arthur muttered under his breath, knowing very well Leon did this to ‘help’ him in confessing his feelings to Merlin.
Merlin looked at him confused before the doorbell distracted him. The warlock studied Arthur for a moment longer than necessary before heading to the door and opening it. A green- haired young man was waiting patiently.
“Ah Oliver, Happy Christmas, come in, come in.” Merlin smiled and ushered the boy in.
“Thanks Mr. P, and Happy Christmas to you too.” Oliver replied brightly, removing his snowy boots.
“Alright Oliver, come and meet our guest, I’m sure Cae’s told you everything.”
“Ha, yeah, so did Gran, Mrs. Smith told her all about your guys good samaritan deed.” Oliver smirked.
Merlin, Caelia and Leon all rolled their eyes at his statement. Though Cae did sit up straighter, to Arthur’s amusement.
“Hey Oli, Happy Christmas.” She welcomed her boyfriend with a chaste kiss.
“Happy Christmas to you too, love.” He replied, pulling off his drawstring bag and smiling at Arthur.
“Arthur meet Caelia’s boyfriend, Oliver Gale. Oliver this is Arthur.” Merlin introduced them from his place at the doorway.
“Pleasure to meet you, sir, I’m sorry about all that’s happened.” Oliver shook Arthur’s hand.
“The pleasure is mine, Oliver and thank you.” Arthur replied, smiling at the younger man.
“Oli, good to see you mate.” Leon greeted from his place on the sofa.
“Mr. Knight, good to see you too, Happy Christmas by the way.”
“Same to you. Brought any of your Gran’s biscuits this year?”
Oliver laughed and pulled out a plastic container filled with gingerbread men and sugar cookies out of his bag, and handed them to Merlin.
“Even better she baked double for you lot for your generosity this year.”
“Yes!” Leon cheered
“Mom and Mum say hi and Happy Christmas to everyone.” he said, digging through his bag for more packages, all carefully wrapped in festive paper.
“Babe, give me a hand with these please?” he asked, already picking up most of them and placing them carefully under the christmas tree. Caelia carried the last few to him, before she announced that they were heading to her room.
“Alright but you know the rules, the door stays open!” Merlin called out to the rapidly disappearing couple.
“Yeah.yeah we know.” came the reply.
Arthur snorted, “You have no idea how satisfying it is to see someone acting insolent towards you.”
Merlin glared playfully, “Of course you would find it satisfying. You were a tyrant to me back in Camelot, would make sense you’re the same now.”
The evening passed by in a similar manner with Merlin and Arthur bickering like an old married couple to the amusement of the others. Oliver and Arthur bonded over their fondness for athletics, with Merlin and Caelia watching on in horror as Arthur offered to give the boy tips on how to improve his archery, meaning that they had to accompany them on this excursion.
But all too soon it was time for Oliver to head back home, and the evening wound down, and Leon decided it was time to head next door to his own house.
“Arthur, this is something I actually forgot about. Consider it an early Christmas present.” Leon gave him a sad smile and a small box, wrapped in Camelot red, before heading out the door.
“Alright all of you, good night all of you. Don’t wake me tomorrow, I already know I’m going to be hung-over.” he called over his shoulder.
“Good night Leo! I’m going to head up too, I’m exhausted. G’night dad, g'night Arthur.” the teenager pecked both men on the cheek and left with a yawn.
Merlin and Arthur stared at each other before the blond awkwardly looked. Flushing, he bid his friend goodnight and proceeded to hide in his room.
Settling down on his bed he opened Leon’s gift. It was a journal, similar to the one he had as a Prince. Opening the old book, he realised it was empty, except an aged envelope that had his name written in Anglo-saxon. The handwriting belonged to Guinvere he realised belatedly, with clammy hands he pulled out a letter, and read it very carefully.
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After several hours, Arthur was still awake, his mind was reeling, trying to process everything he had read, and everything that had happened that day, since he came back and in truth everything that happened since he met that raven haired menace.
Resolutely making up his mind he got up and headed to Merlin’s room. He waited patiently for him to open the door, by waiting patiently, we all know that Arthur just pounded that door, and very loudly kept repeating Merlin’s name.
“For the love of...What?” the raven asked irritatedly, throwing open his door. His hair wilder than normal, glaring sleepily.
Arthur just pushed past him, ignoring the scoff he received, forcefully sat the warlock onto his bed and kneeled in front of him, holding his hands.
“Arthur, are you alright? You’re acting very strange.” Merlin asked worriedly, pulling a hand away and using it to check Arthur for fever.
“ Mer lin, just shut up and listen to me please.” the blond asked, grabbing Merlin’s hand in his again.
“I've been in love with you since I went to the caves of Balnor to get you the Morteus flower after you drank poison for me. I kept all my feelings bottled up inside, mostly from the fear of my father finding out, and because it was wrong, or at least I thought it was wrong. I’m sorry for all the pain I caused you, from killing Freya, to blindly trusting Agravaine, for making you think that your actions didn’t matter, for marrying Guinvere when I was too big a coward to tell you that you were and still are my world, I’ve loved you since you cheated during our fight in the market. I’m sorry you had to go through all that pain without me, I’m sorry for causing some of it. I never thanked you for taking me into your house, you didn’t have to, you could have just helped me and left me to my devices or you could have done nothing and just lived in peace with Cae, but you're always by my side like you promised me centuries ago. I love you Merlin, I always have and I always will.” with that Arthur took a breath and looked at the raven’s face.
Which was currently completely blank with his blue eyes blinking rapidly, he opened his mouth and closed it several times when no sound came out. Then he pinched himself, and winced when it hurt.
“I….uh....so this isn’t a dream?” he croaked, his eyes brimming with tears
Arthur could only nod his head, watching Merlin’s face change from confusion to a sweet joy. Merlin launched himself onto Arthur, wrapping his arms around his neck and smashing his lips against the others. Arthur lost his balance and they fell to the floor with a thump.
“I love you too Arthur Pendragon.” Merlin whispered against his lips before joining them again.
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My dearest Arthur,
If Merlin’s dragon is correct then someday you will return and I believe him, so this letter is for that day. Today would have been our thirtieth wedding anniversary, and I thought it would be appropriate to fill you on all that’s happened since you’ve been gone.
I have remarried, Leon is now my husband, the council decided two years after your death, I must marry again, after all an heir was needed. Leon and I have three sons and two daughters. When they were born I hoped they would grow up to be like you. The boys are Thomas, Arthur and Elyan. The girls are Elaine and Helaine. They were such a handful as children, sometimes I would imagine what our child would look like, it’s a thought that has grown infrequent in my mind, I must admit.
The magical ban has been rescinded, after we found out about how much Merlin has done for you and all of us, it seemed quite cruel to have it in place. Poor Merlin, he was so heartbroken after that day. Percival found him sobbing by the shores of Lake Avalon, two days after yours’ and Gwaine’s death. Loyal Gwaine he gave his life for you, Morgana got to him. I’m afraid I can’t write more about it, even after so many years it still hurts. Merlin himself only returned to Camelot two years after Leon and I wed.
I worry about Merlin, he is now my oldest friend, but he isn’t the same man he used to be. He’s quieter, more solemn, if you were here you’d know how to cheer him up. He and Leon haven’t changed at all since that day, physically at least, Merlin and Gauis said it was because of the cup of life for Leon and Merlin's magic that’s keeping them looking so young. It doesn’t matter in the end I suppose, this time I will be the one to leave my beloved husband first, I’m just teasing you dear.
In more sad news, our old friend Gauis passed away last year, it was so hard on all of us, especially Merlin. You probably didn’t realize how much he loves you, the more I think of our past my dear Arthur, I don’t think I was your true love and I don’t think you were ever truly in love with me. Now don’t get me wrong I did love you, I still do, but it’s not the same. And I think you already knew this when we married. I don’t blame you, no matter what happened I believe deep down my true love was Lancelot, so no need to feel guilty.
When you do come back Arthur, whether it’s tomorrow or five hundred years from now, tell him how you feel. One thing I’ve learned in my life Arthur, is that true love comes by once, so make the best of it when you can, you won’t get it again. I just happened to be extremely lucky to find two amazing and loving husbands after I lost my true love, through my own fault.
As your friend and Queen, it is my wish, my last wish in a way, for you to be happy Arthur, and only you can make Merlin happy, so don’t be afraid and take your chance.
All my love,
Guinevere