Chapter Text
Blue (12:03pm): you’re a lifesaver - thanks again for covering my route
Adam (12:04pm): I owe you one for all the free pizza
Blue (12:04pm): at LEAST one
Blue (12:04pm): So, you have all the driving directions and the house keys and the individual dog profiles?
Adam (12:04pm): Yep. Stop worrying. I can walk a few dogs for a week.
Blue (12:04pm): I know you -- don’t try to multitask and walk more than one at a time! The service doesn’t let you do that – they each need “individual attention.”
Adam (12:04pm): fine
Blue (12:04pm): and don’t forget to leave a note after each walk telling the owner whether the dog peed/pooped/met any other animals/anything weird/anything cute/etc.
Adam (12:04pm): I can’t believe the service makes you do that
Blue (12:05pm): rich people require a lot of hand holding, dude
Blue (12:05pm): although it IS kind of important for the owners to know if the dog didn’t take a shit or got in a fight at the park
Adam (12:05pm): true
Adam (12:05pm): enjoy your trip – I’ve got this covered
Blue (12:05pm): luv u bro
Adam (12:05pm): u 2
**
Ronan (1:34pm): where’s the key to the liquor cabinet
Gansey (1:34pm): Do you honestly think I’m going to tell you that?
Ronan (1:34pm): dick
Ronan (1:34pm): who even HAS a liquor cabinet
Ronan (1:34pm): let alone one with a fucking lock
Gansey (1:34pm): I believe most have locks, and you’re proving the utility of them right now.
Ronan (1:35pm): come on
Gansey (1:35pm): Do you honestly think I would even leave the key IN THE HOUSE while you’re housesitting? Some of my collection is expensive, and should be savored. You do not savor.
Ronan (1:35pm): I savor
Gansey (1:36pm): …
Ronan (1:36pm): fine
Gansey (1:36pm): How’s Glenny?
Ronan (1:36pm): slobbering on my leg
Ronan (1:36pm): it’s like ur here
Gansey (1:36pm): Don’t forget to let him out in the morning and before bed. The dogwalker comes at two and will give him his big walk.
Ronan (1:37pm): i read your 3-page Glenny manifesto
Gansey (1:37pm): I’m sorry I’m being over-protective. I know you’ll take good care of him. And he loves you.
Ronan (1:37pm): I love the big doofus too
Ronan (1:37pm): don’t tell him
Gansey (1:37pm): Your secret is safe with me.
**
Adam (2:11pm): I thought you said the houses were empty when you pick up the dogs.
Blue (2:18pm): they usually are… everybody’s always at work
Blue (2:18pm): I’ve never met any of the owners in person
Blue (2:18pm): you met an owner?
Adam (2:18pm): you could say that…
**
Ronan (2:22pm): i met the dogwalker
Gansey (2:29pm): Really? I’ve never met them – the service deals with all of that.
Gansey (2:29pm): Were they nice?
Ronan (2:30pm): I guess
Ronan (2:30pm): i was naked at the time
**
Blue (2:19pm): HE WAS NAKED???
Adam (2:19pm): Not NAKED naked. He had boxers on. Mostly on. They were pretty low.
Blue (2:19pm): OMG
Blue (2:19pm): what did you do???
**
Ronan (2:31pm): so I’m standing there in my underwear eating cereal
Gansey (2:31pm): As one does.
Ronan (2:31pm): and the front door opens and this guy walks in
Ronan (2:31pm): and we just kind of look at each other
**
Adam (2:20pm): So the mostly naked guy doesn’t say anything. He just kind of freezes in the middle of lifting his spoon.
Adam (2:20pm): And I have no idea what to say!
Blue (2:20pm): ohmygodohmygodohmygod
Adam (2:21pm): So finally I just say, “Hi, I’m here to walk Glendower?” … like it’s a question.
Adam (2:21pm): And he goes “Oh.”
Adam (2:21pm): And then he turns around and walks into what I think was the kitchen and this GIANT BEAR comes bursting out.
Blue (2:21pm): Yep, that’s Glenny.
Adam (2:21pm): OK, first of all WHY DID YOU NOT WARN ME THAT I WAS WALKING A WOOLLY MAMMOTH.
Adam (2:21pm): And second, why did you not warn me that the woolly mammoth’s owner IS A FUCKING SMOKE SHOW???
Blue (2:22pm): bahahahahaha
Blue (2:22pm): ok, now I get it
**
Gansey (2:32pm): So you just left the room without saying anything?
Ronan (2:32pm): wasn’t much to say
Gansey (2:32pm): I TOLD you what time the dogwalker comes! Why were you naked in the living room? Why were you naked in my living room AT ALL??
Gansey (2:32pm): Oh dear god. Please tell me you didn’t sit on the couch.
Ronan (2:32pm): so what’s the deal with the dogwalker
Gansey (2:33pm): The deal? I told you I’ve never met them.
Ronan (2:33pm): so this stranger just comes and goes from your house without a word
Gansey (2:33pm): Well, they leave a note after each walk to let me know how Glenny did.
Ronan (2:33pm): how glenny did???
Gansey (2:33pm): I understand it’s quite a common element of this type of service.
Ronan (2:33pm): so he’ll be back in what… a half hour… and since I’m here he can just TELL me about glenny’s big day out instead of leaving a note, right?
Gansey (2:33pm): Ronan, please do not lose this dogwalking service for me.
Ronan (2:34pm): relax dick
Ronan (2:34pm): I got this
Gansey (2:34pm): At least put on some pants. I’m begging you.
**
Adam (3:20pm): so I didn’t leave a note at Glenny’s
Blue (3:20pm): PARRISH
Adam (3:20pm): because I talked to the guy
Adam (3:20pm): he had clothes on this time
Adam (3:20pm): sadly
Blue (3:21pm): ADAM
Adam (3:21pm): dude… you didn’t see him
Blue (3:21pm): IF I LOSE MY JOB BECAUSE YOU’RE HITTING ON CLIENTS
Adam (3:21pm): I didn’t hit on him! I told him about Glenny’s “business transactions”
Adam (3:21pm): and you wanna know what kills any potential sexual chemistry?
Adam (3:22pm): talking about dog shit
Blue (3:22pm): good!
Adam (3:22pm): although then we did get to talking about other stuff
Blue (3:22pm): ADAM!
Adam (3:22pm): It was nothing! And besides, he’s not even the owner! He’s house-sitting. Your precious gig is secure.
Adam (3:22pm): I wonder if he’ll be there tomorrow…
Blue (3:22pm): I swear to fucking god parrish