Chapter Text
@pippipcheerio added @bagthegins, @samnotsowise, @ merrychristmas, @gimgimgeree, @assagorn , @borrowmir, @leggy, @arwening and @lmaoeowyn to the group
@pipipcheerio named the group hiatt baker hoes B)
pippipcheerio: HEY HEY
merrychristmas: pippin’s gay
pippipcheerio: 🧍
merrychristmas: oh i thought we were rhyming nvm
bagthegins: literally why would we be rhyming meriadoc
lmaoeowyn: wtf kind of name is meriadoc
arwening: eowyn love don’t even try
lmaoeowyn: yk what that’s fair
leggy: the end
borrowmir: the way i don’t know any of you 🧍
pippipcheerio: neither do i i got y’alls numbers when we first moved into hiatt baker so i figured why not throw everyone into a gc and see what happens 🥳
samnotsowise: ooooo we could go around and introduce ourselves
pippipcheerio: YES GOOD PLAN NAME PRONOUNS AND COURSE GO
merrychristmas: what’s crackalackin i’m merry he/him and modern languages 🥳
bagthegins: frodo they/them and liberal arts
arwening: hihi!! am arwen she/they and childhood studies it’s funky to meet y’all
arwening: oh i’m also dating eowyn :)
lmaoeowyn: hi love <3
lmaoeowyn: i’m eowyn btw she/her and criminology
borrowmir: wait are you the pixie cut girl in the front row of prof elrond’s class w all the pins on your bag
lmaoeowyn: in the flesh and at your service B)
borrowmir: omg swaggy i’m the guy w the long hair and tory dad 😔😔😔
lmaoeowyn: say less i remember you now
lmaoeowyn: are you a tory tho
borrowmir: wtf no i’m a ✨homosexualé✨
pippipcheerio: okay good no kicking today <3
pippipcheerio: lo i’m pippin he/they and classics
merrychristmas: don’t ask him about patroclus and achilles he Will tell you about his smut fic in Excruciating detail
gimgimgeree: @pippipcheerio dm me
assagorn: wait no
borrowmir: wait why do i want to see it
leggy: ^
samnotsowise: OKAY MOVING SWIFTLY ALONG
samnotsowise: m’name’s sam uh he/him and anthropology
leggy: that’s so swag i wanted to take that but my mf dad made me do marketing i’m bored to tears
leggy: literally someone come pick me up from class tmrw i physically cannot
leggy: hi btw i’m legolas and they/them
lmaoeowyn: omg judging by your pfp i think i saw you in the lift like once
lmaoeowyn: cut your hair greasy ass mf
leggy: excuse me the only greasy ass mf here is aragorn
assagorn: wow i feel so loved rn
leggy: silence severus snape
merrychristmas: sweet sweet alliteration 🅱️)
pippipcheerio: @assagorn i don’t know anything about you except that you’re in hiatt baker but ily :)
assagorn: :)
assagorn: right back atcha kiddo
bagthegins: wait this is pure i love this
gimgimgeree: out here cleansing the tl y’all are doing god’s work
gimgimgeree: gimli he/him and econ </3
gimgimgeree: me n leggy met in a mcdonalds line at two am n now we’re dating 😌
arwening: wait is there a Singular straight person here
borrowmir: ,,,,,,,
lmaoeowyn: 👀👀👀
samnotsowise: speak now or forever hold your peace
assagorn: i doubt it tbh
merrychristmas: okay he’s p not wrong but THIS PERSON IS CREEPING ME OUT WHY DO THEY KNOW US
assagorn: are you shitting me
assagorn: we’re all on the same hall and most of you don’t stfu
pippipcheerio: aragorn be nice or i’ll kick you >:(
samnotsowise: 🦵
lmaoeowyn: PLSSSSSSS LMAOAOAOAOAO
bagthegins: y’all hear that sound wtf
borrowmir: eowyn is that-
arwening: can confirm yes it is she’s in my lap wheezing and her face is Very red
pippipcheerio: 😏
leggy: PIPPIN YOU SINNER BE QUIET
merrychristmas: THIS IS SO FUNNY
gimgimgeree: HELLO IS EOWYN OKAY
arwening: OMG I’M SO SORRY HER SENSE OF HUMOUR IS BROKEN
lmaoeowyn: yuh we’re good i have the hiccups tho and arwen is Bullying me
arwening: I’M NOT THEY SOUND SO FUNNY
lmaoeowyn: you’re a Bully
samnotsowise: ty eowyn for stroking my fragile ego by laughing sm at my leg emoji that you almost died
samnotsowise: i’ll be accepting donations at the door
bagthegins: aragorn you hecker what course are you doing
pippipcheerio: and your pronouns!!!! :)
assagorn: geology and he/him
lmaoeowyn: omg rock boy
merrychristmas: maybe he can tell me what all my fossils on animal crossing are i’m fucking sick of blathers making me feel guilty every time i tell him i don’t want to know about idk pterodactyl tails
arwening: OMG ADD ME ON ANIMAL CROSSING I’LL GIVE YOU PEARS
merrychristmas: i have peaches i’m good ty <3
arwening: WHY IS EVERYONE SO AGAINST PEARS WTF
samnotsowise: i believe in pear supremacy
bagthegins: #justiceforarwenspears😔
gimgimgeree: arwen can i have your pears if merry doesn’t want them my island is a safe space for ALL fruits
merrychristmas: this feels like a callout
gimgimgeree: surprise shawty it was
borrowmir: gimli isn’t your island called bermuda triangle
gimgimgeree: and what about it
lmaoeowyn: y’all want to come to my room and watch a film and 🧪✂️bond✂️🧪
arwening: the only reason we’re dating is bc you use emojis like that
lmaoeowyn: ding dong you are wrong the only reason we’re dating is bc your coffee machine has a frother
pippipcheerio: can we watch fantastic beasts ‼️‼️‼️
merrychristmas: ffs pippin you’re such a child smh
samnotsowise: stfu merry let them speak 👀
bagthegins: i’d rather look at eddie redmayne for two hours than the dead bodies of jack the ripper’s victims meriadoc
lmaoeowyn: ANNIE CHAPMAN DESERVED BETTER ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️
lmaoeowyn: sorry
merrychristmas: why are you sorry you’re right
arwening: kinda wanna watch fantastic beasts too tbh
arwening: alison sudol is on my list of five people eowyn would let me get railed by if the opportunity ever arose
leggy: gimli why don’t we have these
gimgimgeree: good question i’m on it
leggy: ft me tonight we’ll do it then
gimgimgeree: is this bc you have a paper you don’t want to do
leggy: will neither confirm nor deny
gimgimgeree: legolas greenleaf stop trying to fail out of your marketing class i
leggy: it isn’t going to happen i keep getting firsts 😔
lmaoeowyn: i hate everything about that sentence
samnotsowise: it’s okay legolas
samnotsowise: i’ll just get on with my anthropology work sayonara bitches <3
leggy: SAM I STG
assagorn: y’all are sleeping on kath waterston tbh
arwening: aragorn are you a bi bitch too
assagorn: affirmative 🥳
arwening: wait period
lmaoeowyn: OKAY EVERYONE COME OVER
borrowmir: wtf that was so fun
bagthegins: i literally have no friends except sam (and pippin and merry but they don’t count bc i’m related to them) so this was such a vibe
lmaoeowyn: who left pippin in my bathtub i
lmaoeowyn: i want to take a SHOWER
merrychristmas: don’t wait for him to get up he’ll be out for three hours at the least
lmaoeowyn: FOR FUCK’S SAKE
arwening: love you can use mine dw :)
lmaoeowyn: thank you darling <33 do you wanna go to nando’s after
arwening: omg swaggy yeah sure
lmaoeowyn: one of y’all need to watch pippin
merrychristmas: i’ll do it i can do my work in your room
borrowmir: i’ll come too why not
lmaoeowyn: funky thank you i’ll leave the door unlocked
samnotsowise: eowyn can you bring back chicken :))
lmaoeowyn: yk what sure but only for you and frodo bc the other two are menaces