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Chloe opened her eyes, all too soon realizing she was alone in Lucifer’s bed. After the night they’d had, she’d expect even him to have sleep hard tonight. A devil has his limits, right?
Apparently not, considering he was sitting out on the balcony of his penthouse with his wings unfurled and taking in the moonlight. She couldn’t help but smile. Normally he didn’t willingly have them out, but he was gradually growing less resentful of them, especially knowing it helped to reassure Chloe she wasn’t approaching an imposter.
After a moment or two of witnessing a simple moment of calm, she pulled herself up. There had to be a reason he was up like this. There always was.
He seemed to notice her quickly, with the way his wings twitched behind him. His head turned for him to look at her once she got to the doorway. A soft smile came to his face and she could have sworn his eyes reflected the night sky even without facing toward it.
“Up for sevenths, are you?” Lucifer teased, cocking an eyebrow. “I’m surprised you rose so soon, if those snores of yours told a story at all.”
“Ass,” Chloe said, nudging him a little. She sunk down into a seat beside him, shaking her head when he silently offered to pour a second glass. “What’s got you up?”
She could spot the conflict rising in Lucifer’s face from a mile away. His vulnerability, even if he didn’t physically have it anymore, was still ever present in his emotions.
“I’m... thinking,” He finally decided to say. There was an unsure air about him, and she knew he had more to tell.
“About?”
At that, he almost visibly sunk in his seat. Evidently he hadn’t planned for her to press the matter. He lifted his glass and emptied the rest of the contents in a long drink—a way to prolong his inevitable answer.
“You,” He murmured.
That confused her. He looked so solemn, so hesitant... because he was thinking about her? Had she done something? The questions kept coming, but he stopped her in her tracks.
“I’ve been avoiding saying some things to you. As you know,” Lucifer continued, now looking down into his empty glass. “Then again, omission of truth and lies aren’t so different, hm? I did make a promise to you, after all.”
“Lucifer, you don’t have to...” He brought a hand up, now making eye contact.
“Detecti—Chloe. I know you were made unsure about my affections for you. That is at least partially my fault.”
She had rarely seen him so serious. For the longest time, she had thought of him as this immature manchild who wanted nothing more than sex and crime and all the things she was taught to hate in her sheltered upbringing.
Yet, here, he looked all too wise. All too broken.
“I thought you ought to know just why I can’t bring myself to say those words. Hadn’t planned on you waking so soon, but I suppose I should rip off the proverbial Band-Aid,” As he spoke, he lifted the bottle of whichever expensive liquor he’d chosen tonight and poured himself a new glass, “I will say, it’s... heavy. Very celestial, too. Though that’s a trend with me.”
Chloe studied his expression. He hardly ever opened up willingly, even to her. “I’ll listen to whatever you need to tell me,” She said, reaching over and settling her hand on his thigh. It visibly reassured him.
“Right. Well, you know I was kicked out by dear old Dad. Rebellion, falling, the whole nine yards. And... you know my former name,” Lucifer paused, gritting his teeth a bit, “I was the Lightbringer, Chloe. Every star you see in this sky was placed by me.”
That she hadn’t known. Even in her time in Rome, no one spoke of Lucifer’s time as an angel. She looked up in wonder, studying the night sky now with a fascination she would have never had before. “That’s... trillions, Lucifer.”
“Multiply that by a hundred a few times,” Lucifer replied, pride swelling in his chest. “It’s the one damn thing I was ever truly proud of back then.” His face seemed to fall after that.
“What happened?” Chloe tentatively asked, furrowing her eyebrows. There was more to this, or else he wouldn’t be revealing something like this so suddenly.
“I was cast down. You know, my father doesn’t take too kindly to a rebellious son.”
“Understatement of the century.”
“Try millenia. Anyway, I know you’ve never been to Hell—and you will never go, just to clarify—but it’s not the common description. Not a big giant pool of lava and little burning sinners. It’s dark and grey and ashy. The worst part is how cloudy it is.”
“It’s...what?”
Lucifer huffed out a snicker at her confusion. “The sky is covered entirely in the greyest clouds you could possibly think of. No flying through, no gaps, nothing.”
“Which means you couldn’t...”
“See my stars. Yes, precisely. They were the one thing my father knew I cared for more than anything else, and he snatched them away. Even when placing them, I told them each and individually their place in the universe, how beautiful they were...”
“You told them loved them.”
“...Yes. I did.”
“So you’re scared of saying it again. Because you don’t want me to go away,” Chloe concluded. Oh, if she ever met God, she might have to prove Lucifer wrong about where she’s going for the afterlife. She is going to beat the shit out of that deadbeat.
Lucifer didn’t say anything, but his gaze confirmed what she said. “Sometimes I only came back here to look at them. But you humans don’t really get to see their full glory.”
“Lucifer, I...” Chloe stammered, trying to find the words. How do you reassure the Devil of eons worth of anguish? “I’m so sorry.” It wasn’t enough, but it was something. She squeezed his thigh and he rested his free hand on hers.
“You don’t have to pity me, Detective. I thought you'd rather know this than question what it is that I really mean. But for the record... I do. Even if I cannot bring myself to say so.”
Chloe smiled. “I love you too, Lucifer. And for the record, I’m not going anywhere.”
She found herself being pulled into a tight embrace, wings and all. Maybe her devil just needed some reassurance now and then.