Chapter Text
He had never seen her so distraught before. She was already such a frail thing and seeing her crumpled atop the sheets of her bed hugging her knees further into her chest made it all the more difficult for him.
His throat constricted hot shame and guilt coursed its way through his body, injecting into his veins. He shook his head shaking away the guilt. It was useless the shame just clung back onto him. He wasn’t the cause of her pain this time he repeated in a heavy mantra. She had loved Adonis, more than she could have ever loved him. To think he was foolish enough to believe that she would someday love a monster such as himself. The mortals feared him. His own family feared him, it wasn’t like she would have thought any different.
He continued watching as she continued to wail into herself. Stop that. He wanted her to stop. It pained him seeing her like this. He never liked seeing anguish, pain, and hurt etched on the faces of those around him. Mortals thought he was sick – deranged even – because he dealt with the matters of the dead. Mortals and gods alike believed that he loved inflicting pain onto others. He didn’t. He was just a walking catastrophe who brought pain and suffering wherever he went. He didn’t ask for this life. For this existence. Sometimes he wondered what would have happened if the gods didn’t win against the titans. Maybe he would have had a more peaceful existence burrowed deep within his father instead of having to deal with his life now.
Another earth-shattering wail dragged him from his thoughts. Curse Zeus for getting him into this mess. He cursed himself more for dragging her into it all too. Zeus was the one who propositioned him on marrying Persephone. Apparently he was getting older and he needed someone to warm his bed at night. He disagreed at first. He didn’t deserve anyone’s love. A monster like him didn’t deserve the company of someone else. More importantly he didn’t want someone else to have the burdens that came along with ruling the underworld it wasn’t fair. He himself didn’t want the burden. Why should he place it onto someone else as well?
But then he saw her for the first time. She was simply ethereal. She was happiness personified with the way she tended to the gardens and interacted with those around. So different from me he had thought to himself back then. He was completely smitten with her. Everything about her intrigued him and he wanted to know more.
I knew you’d like her Zeus had stated patting him on the shoulder. He normally didn’t like receiving physical affection from others, but he was so enamoured by her that he didn’t even notice at the time. He thought she knew about the arrangement. He thought her mother knew about the arrangement too. How foolish was he to trust in someone like Zeus. When he came to collect her and take her to his domain he was shocked to see the fear mapped on her face and the pure terror his presence brought. For days on end she cried for her mother and he didn’t know what to do. She was his bride. Zeus said he had organised everything already, so why was she acting like this? Wasn’t a bride supposed to be happy on her wedding day? Wasn’t a bride supposed to want to see her husband? It took an urgent visit from Hermes to realise what he did wrong or what his brother did wrong. He resigned to take all the blame it was his fault. He didn’t deserve love. How foolish was he to think that someone would choose to willingly love him.
He was ready to let her go. Ready to let her reunite with her mother who had fallen into such a deep well of sadness, she refused to let any crops grow and the weather had ravaged the continent. To his and everyone else’s horror Persephone was more foolish and naive than the rumours had said. She had cursed herself by eating fruit from the underworld. She was now forever bound to him. Of course, no one believe that she did it by accident. They all blamed him. He was reduced to a cruel trickster who resorted to scheming to get what he wanted. If he thought the gods and the people hated him before they surely detested him now. Instead of fighting back he took the blame. He always took the blame. It was easier to take the blame instead of fighting to clean his already soiled reputation.
He looked over and she had calmed down. Instead of the high-pitched wails she was now quietly sobbing. She occasionally hiccupped every now and again from the exertion she had caused herself. She must have sensed his presence he mused as he saw her go rigid. She was finally aware of his presence. She didn’t look up at him. He didn’t expect her to look at him. He stayed rooted in his spot leaning his heavy frame against the door. He didn’t want to frighten her further by approaching her. He took a deep breath. He was always a man of little words. Best to just finally get it out of the way.
“Persephone would you like our marriage to be annulled?”