Archive of Our Own ^beta

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Link was slumped against, honestly he didn’t know what to call the weird ass misshapen fancy couch that existed in Zelda’s study. He watched Zelda putter around the study talking about some foreign country, he had stopped listening to her a while ago. He was startled when Zelda smacked him behind the head. Even though Ganon hadn’t managed to kill him, Zelda looked as if she was seconds away from wringing his neck.

“You could at least pretend like you’re interested in what I’m saying, you know?” She huffed.

”Why would I care about the politics of some other country, it’s not like you’re sending me off as some piss poor diplomat like you did when you sent me off to Labrinthia and Holodrum.” He groused.

”I did that because all Hyrule thought you were a criminal and it took me ages to clear you name. That and,” she chimed, causing his stomach to sink. “I was hoping you could join me on a trip to Hytopia.”

”No-“ He attempted to refuse but Zelda placed a hand over his mouth before he could keep talking.

”Hytopia is more concerned about fashion to be in any sort of political turmoil, I simply want to visit somewhere other than a castle. You can consider it a vacation to get to know Ravio better.” She raised a smug eyebrow and Link licked her hand. She pulled away with disgust and wiped her had on his face. 

“Fine, I’ll keep you company on you girls trip. I’ll try to convince Ravio to join us. If. Anything. Goes. Wrong. I’m. Blaming. You.” He spat out amd immediately walked to the window in Zelda’s study and mentally prepared himself to avoid the castle guards.

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It hadn't taken long for Link to convince Ravio to join them on their journey, especially after mentioning the potential to con people in another country. Zelda provided them with clothes that would be less "suspicious" for traveling, Link was thankful that Zelda provided him clothes that didn't require pants. She had mentioned that Hilda would be looking after the castle while they were gone. Link knew she had a small crush on her Lorulian counterpart, which made her teasing him over his crush on Ravio fairly ironic. He honestly wished the best for her in her relationship with Hilda, but he'd never admit that he liked Ravio. The last time he had fallen in love with someone it turned out that she was never real and he was forced to erase her from existence. He figured that may as well be the Goddesses' way of saying that life as a hero didn't allow for things that normal people had. Maybe he could settle down and have a normal life when Hyrule or some other country wasn't in peril of some form of evil. If he ever lived long enough to do that.

Otherwise, there was no point in telling Ravio how he felt, there was no point in forcing his feelings on someone else. At least Zelda had good reasoning for not saying her feelings, she had obligations as the princess. He was happy that she got along well enough with Ralph to find some happiness in their forced relationship. They both couldn't have what they truly wanted for different reasons.

Traveling to Hytopia was long and fairly uneventful, they traveled around the area known in Hytopia as the Drablands. Link couldn't help but sigh in relief when they saw the gates to the town of the capitol. He didn't feel like jinxing himself in hoping that nothing would go wrong anytime soon, he's been on too many adventures to think that. He could feel Zelda radiating with excitement, it was almost infectious, just almost. He felt a sting of fear seeing the guard at the gate, but quickly reminded himself that he wasn't in Hyrule and his hair was unfortunately pink from how long they had been traveling. He almost wished he had a hood to cover his head as they approached the gates. He could also tell Ravio was nervous too, but wasn't sure if it was just his generalized reaction.

The guard saw them approach and immediately called their attention, he felt his stomach sink but he followed Zelda nonetheless. He grabbed hold of Ravio to keep him moving forward. When they finally approached the guard, Link noticed the guard had an apologetic look on his face, Link made a mental bet on all the wares he bought from Ravio that he was going to get roped into another adventure. The guard began to talk about how the capitol had been closed because their beloved princess had been cursed, he was hardly paying attention because he had heard the same story multiple times.

He started out of his thoughts when the guard exclaimed, "wait all of you. Those pointed ears, the sideburns, your parted hair." Okay, Link was confused. Yes, they all looked fairly similar. He and Zelda were siblings it was a given, and Ravio was literally his doppelgänger. But what in the Mako Tree's name was this guy on about. "You lot must be heroes whove come to save our dearest Pincess!" Well shit, so much for that. At least Ravio didn't know about his mental bet, he looked over and saw Ravio eyeing him with a greedy look. Well, fuck his entire existence, he could practically tell Sheerow was close to recovering all the items he bought from Ravio.

The next few minutes involved being rushed to the castle, then being told by the very masculine but flamboyant Captain of the guard to see a Madame Couture. Madame Couture shop was interesting to say the least, Link could feel his need to hoard buzzing under his skin. Madame Couture complained about how their clothes were "unherolike" and soon they were crafted matching tunics in different colors. Madame Couture griped with him over his refusal to wear pants, but did gush over the color of his hair which made him slightly uncomfortable. Soon they were back in the castle; Zelda was wearing pale blue, Ravio purple with his scarf secured around his neck, and he was wearing red. Zelda giggled a bit about him looking like a overgrown strawberry and Link let her have her fun.

When they were back in the castle they were given a very rudimentary explanation of the Drablands, then they were forced into place on the triforce shaped tiles on the floor. A bright light filled his vision and soon the were in the middle of a forest. Oh, yay, the learn as you go approach. Same shit as always. He turned to Zelda and Ravio. Ravio looked paler than usual, which was understandable, and Zelda had the decency to look sheepish.

He only had one thing to say to her, "I told you so."

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Link observed the area they were teleported to and quickly determined that this area was at least safe, across the bridge however was another question. I ignored the sound of his sister trying to comfort the panicking Ravio and started to rifle though the bag he brought with him. He'd figured they would need the extra items for the road but at least he thought to plan ahead. At least he had enough items hoarded from his adventures to arm three people. He set aside a pair of pegasus boots for each of them, as well as a set of power bracelets. He also set aside a bow and silver arrows, fire rod, and ice rod aside for Zelda, there was no use in her getting potentially injured. He picked out items for Ravio too, mainly ones the man had sold him figuring that he'd know how to use them. Why the Hytopian guards though it was a good idea sending the three of them into monster infested lands without making sure they had any weaponry was beyond him.

He turned to Zelda and Ravio, wincing slightly at the obvious fear on Ravio's face, he quickly handed out the items to them. Then he took another look at Ravio and heaved a loud sigh, "Ravio, tie back your hair and tuck it into your cap." The merchant looked confused but he continued before he could ask, "monsters will try to grab your hair if you leave it out." The merchant yelped at that idea and quickly began tying back his hair.

"Why shouldn't I tie back my hair too?" Zelda looked at him questioningly, they had gotten closer after she told him they were related. She told him after he'd saved her and Lorule, she had known sooner but withheld telling him because of Mar... Because of that damned Windfish. It didn't matter, it wasn't real, it never was real.

"Because, you aren't going to go anywhere near any monsters, missy. I’m not gonna stop you if you do put your hair up." He snapped at her, the new closeness had lead to them constantly snarking at each other. "We should be getting a move on anyway, no telling how long this place will stay safe." Zelda huffed but didn’t argue with him further, he turned to cross the bridge and potentially get rid of any monsters that were hidden up ahead. Of course the goddesses decided he needed to go on another adventure, having a vacation was too much to ask for apparently, but why they decided to drag Ravio and Princess Zelda with him was mind boggling.

He was pleasantly surprised when the only thing up ahead was a switch, rather than a group of monsters. He hit the switch with his sword but was irked when it didn’t activate anything. Okay, so more switches but where are they? He looked around which gave time for Ravio and Zelda to catch up with him, and then he spotted the next two switches. Who the fuck decided to put switches on poles without any way of reaching them? He pulled out his bow and struck the highest switch but it did not activate. Of course it’s not that easy.

”What are we supposed to do?” Zelda questioned, he nearly answered but the moment he looked at her and Ravio he had an idea. There’s no way this is going to work.

”Ravio get out your bow, Zelda make sure you have the power bracelets I gave you on. I have an idea and you’re both going to hate it but I need you to listen to me.” They both looked confused but they nodded in conformation to his request. He walked behind Ravio and promptly hoisted the man onto his shoulders with ease. Ravio yelped and grabbed hold of his hair in fear. “Okay, Ravio I need to to hit the switch with your bow straight on, Zel I need you to hit the switch on the ground then pick us both up.” He said as firmly as possible.

“How do you expect me to lift both of you?!”

“Power bracelets, just be quick about it these things are timed!” Both of them jumped into motion, Ravio and Zelda hit the two switches at nearly the same time. Then Link braced himself as he felt himself being lifted onto Zelda’s shoulders. Ravio shot the final arrow and a mechanism clicked and the large wooden door in front of them opened with a force that caused them to loose balance. Link landed flat on his back and he heard an huff of pain from Ravio nearby, he looked to see the man had attempted to break his fall resulting in him falling flat on his face. 

“I’m sorry, I just wasn’t expecting the door to open like that.” Zelda said as she looked over both of them. He and Ravio both assured her that they were fine if not a bit ruffled.

they walked through the doors to find a similar set of triforce shaped tiles as the ones that brought them here. They exchanged a look before stepping on the tiles and being teleported away. Link was unenthused when they were teleported in the middle of a horde of chuchus, instincts prevented him from pulling out his sword for fear of electrocution, but he acted on muscle memory when one got too close to Zelda. Thankfully they weren’t electrically charged, it took a few moments after that revelation to clear the rest of the clearing. After all the monsters were defeated another triforce portal appeared, so this was going to be a thing.

the rest of the area proved to be fairly uneventful with the most threatening thing on Link’s life being the expression on Zelda’s face when he picked her up to throw her onto a safe ledge. She pushed him off a waterfall later in revenge. They returned to the castle as dawn, surprisingly. It hadn’t seemed that long. Zelda and Ravio had taken to settling into the hotel the king thankfully offered to allow them to stay at, but Link decided to take a walk. He was contemplating what form of divine prank the goddess may be attempting to pull on him this time, hopefully she didn’t decide to take Zelda and Ravio out of his life too. It wouldn’t be surprising if that did happen, but that wouldn’t stop it from hurting.

He was distracted by a man standing at the fountain in the square, his clothes looked odd. Then he was horrified when he realized that the man’s clothes were literally cut in half and his back was almost completely bare. Nope. He turned around and walked back to the hotel, hoping to erase what he just saw from his mind.