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Hope sniffles, as picking out photos of the her and Landon from a box she placed under her bed. Planning to cut out Landon from each picture and burn them all. Hope thinks this pain is far more worse then loosing her parents and uncle.
Because at least's with them, she could grieve and mourn due to their deaths... but with Landon, It was different. Only because he was alive.
She planned to change that soon.
As soon as she was going to light the pile of Landon on fire, she heard knocking on her dorm door.
She groaned... but still led herself up to walk over to her door, thinking it was Alaric again, convincing her to eat or train.
Opening her door to only see a Josie Saltzman.
"Hey." Josie said with a big smile on her face.
Hope look's taken back, checking Josie's surrounding's... making sure Dr. Saltzman isn't there. As soon as she knows the coasts is clear her next words are,
"So he sent you, make sure to tell him that this was a nice try... but I'm sorta on a diet that includes not interacting with food or people." Hope says unfazed, almost closing the door.
"Wait! I know you may not want to... talk. But I could really use your help right now."
Hope think's about her decision... later coming to a conclusion that if she busies herself the less she'll think about Landon.
"Fine, what's wrong?"
Josie brightens up real quick after hearing those words.
"It's Lizzie."
///
As packing up for the long drive on the mission to get Lizzie back to the school, someone's voice creeps up just as Hope is putting some stuff in the vehicle her and Josie will be using.
Hope turns her head to soon see Josie and Finch talking, "Really Jo, you knew we had a date today?" Finch says.
"Babe, we can reschedule anytime, but I really need to find my sister.."
"Oh yeah, okay sure. you need to find your sister who brings you down" Finch continues on, turning to Hope. "With this girl too? Sure Jo, if you want I'll spend time with other girls too."
Hope grows irritated with the girls attitude and tone of her voice, making her head grow a migraine.
"Finch.. that's not what I'm saying. C'mon please..." Josie pleads, grabbing Finch's wrist.
The other girl back's away, letting herself go from the taller girls hold. "No! Gosh Josie... your sister will only hurt yo-"
Hope has enough of it.
"Finch, is it? I think so, anyway Josie and I will be on our way to go and return her twin sister back to safety... and if you have a problem with that, I'm sure Josie will be kind enough to talk after she's done with one problem and move to her next. Alright? Alright... good, c'mon Jo."
Hope get's in the passenger seat of the car, rubbing her temples in attempting to calm her nerves down. She hears the car door open, signaling that Josie is in the car.
"Hey, thanks for that.. back there."
Hope looks over to her side, "Its fine, let's just go". Josie get's the message, and starts the car.
///
It's been half an hour into the drive, and Hope grows bored with the old radio station playing.
"Everything okay?" Josie asks, looking at the road.
"Yeah it's fine."
"Listen... if you ever want to talk. I'm always here..."
Hope smiles fondly, "I know Jo."
She decides to stop the awkward silence and try to attempt a conversation between Josie and her. "So you and Finch?"
"Oh yeah! We're... dating, she's just so amazing..." Josie goes on about all the things she loves about Finch, while Hope on the other hand doesn't acknowledge a word she's saying.
"That's nice." Hope says, along with a fake smile.
"Yeah, she's just.. sensitive. But I'm working on changing that. But enough about me and Finch... what's your input on her?"
Hope's stunned by the sudden question, she already knows what she going to say... but afraid they'll come out too harsh.
"She's... different. I think she's... I don't know how to put this." Hope stammers on her words, "She's just, intimidating? I guess."
Josie shocked at the response, "Oh. Well she may have her bad days... and I- I don't know."
"She's not nice Jo." Hope now feels as if she should just let it all out.
"Well yeah, I know what your saying...but she is to me."
"She really isn't, think about it Josie... Landon left me after every outburst we had. But in the end we apologized to each other... that's what makes you and Finch different. She doesn't apologize to you, because your apologizing for her."
"Okay Hope, I get it. Let's just drop it now..." Josie says, making sure this doesn't continue...
Hope was for sure not thinking the same thing while choosing her next words, "But it's like what you said, she's amazing. I'm sure she'll-"
"Hope... I get it." Josie only warns.
"Oh come on Josie, I'm just looking out for you. I know you, and I know how you think Jo. Finch will only leave you just like how Penelope and Jade left." Hope doesn't seem to stop, she just keeps going, and going.
"Hope, I mean it." Warning the shorter girl yet again, looking over at her side.
"I mean hey, she probably gives you butterflies!" Hope exclaim, while throwing her hands up in the air.
"Stop it, Hope..." Josie murmurs, fixing her eyes back on the road.
The other girl turns to her side, "Does she not? If she doesn't then you must not lov-"
Josie beat's her to it.
In the next few minutes, Josie pulls the car over and look over to Hope. And Hope just knows she fucked up.
"You don't get to say that, Hope! This is why Landon left you, all you do is poke, poke, and poke. I can't even blame him for leaving, being with you must be suffocating! God, your horrible, Hope! Why would you do that? I actually tried to be your friend, while trying to cope with you and your messed up your emotions... But your evil, Hope."
She finally said it.
Hope is evil.
Hope looks at Josie, straight in the eye. "You think... I'm evil?" She starts chuckling, that soon turns into laughter.
"I can't believe you find this funny." coming from Josie, who look's disappointed more than ever.
"No no no, you think I'm evil... because I actually said my truths about her. That's just pathetic, Jo. At least's I admitted my thought's on her, she doesn't treat you good, Josie...! Even you know that."
Josie, who now decides to laugh along with her just shakes her head. "No. you're pathetic, Hope. You don't understand what me and Finch have."
"I don't think so, what you and whatever your 'oh so amazing ' girlfriend have is exactly what me and Landon had."
"Oh really?"
"Really." nodding her head, since she's so sure.
"I disagree." Josie sounds unconvinced still.
"Well, I don't. You two will only hurt each other by bringing one another down more and more." Hope says, moving up to Josie's face since the other is no longer paying attention to her.
"And when she does hurt you. You'll understand what I mean.."
Now she's so close.
"Hope, your mad. Just leave me alone.."
"And... where's the fun in that?"
Josie stays silent.
That's when she notices. That their faces are so close, Hope studies the other girls face and features... knowing well enough that Josie doesn't deserve to be with such a hurtful person. Josie doesn't deserve loosing so many people.
Josie notices too, now looking at Hope.
Hopes eyes flicker to her eyes, then nose, and soon later down to the brunettes lip's.
Josie lip's always looked so different from the everyone else's.
it would be so easy.
almost way too easy to give in, just to make sure she's still there, just to make sure she can feel, just to make sure she can feel that she's here, with Josie.
"Hope..."
"Just something.''
"What?''
"Something..." closing her eyes, to give in.
and she almost does.
Just as she does, the other girl has to look over at the other side to stop it.
"...we shouldn't, not like this... not now... you're just hurt and confused.. Hope."
Hope frowns, now she knows she cant go back.
This is how it going to be, now.
///
The two girls don't dare to say another word after... leaving a uncomfortable silence go around them.
Hope knows she's done wrong.
Josie doesn't know what to do, on the other hand.
10 minutes after, Hope just decides to let it all out.
"I'm sorry... for saying that stuff about you and Finch.. and also for trying to uh-"
"It's okay. Let's just not talk about that and pretend it didn't happen..."
Yet those words seem to sting and effect Hope, who doesn't show her sudden tears forming.
"I wasn't being fair." Is all she can be able to say, as her throat closes up.
Josie smiles...
"I'm sorry too.."
"No you don't need to do that."
"I do. I was just mad, and confused... it's silly. But it also wasn't fair of me to bring up Landon."
"I get it."
Josie really does try to not make this go on for longer... until,
"I guess I was jealous.." lowering her head, and murmuring under her breath.
There it is.
Hope is Jealous.
Jealous of what Josie and Finch have.
Of what Finch has...
Josie seems to hear what Hope said.
"...Why?" Josie asks quietly.
And there's just so much. So much of why Hope is jealous...
"Because your happy. And I just hope your happy with her." Hope lets out, with a small sigh.
"What about you? Aren't you happy..?"
Hope smiles sadly, looking out of her side of the car window...
"Only for you."
Josie and her can never go back, now.
She hasn't just had her first heart crushed, but now... her second.