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Ringing.
It felt like his mind was going to implode, crushing tighter and tighter as every breath he breathed became harder to conjure up. His stomach churned, the glass in his hand on the verge of shattering from the pressure he held it with.
The lights raining down from the chandeliers struck his eyes, the laughter from beside him muffled and drowned out by the sound of rain roaring on outside.
Music flowed through the ballroom, dancing as it enchanted everyone who dared listen to its song, everyone except him, whose heart was slowly getting crushed by the deadly nightshade.
The lights melded together, new lights forming from seemingly nowhere as his eyes darted around, trying to lock onto one thing in particular. His fingernails dug into his palms, clawing at the flesh like a lion devouring the carcass of its prey to feast upon.
The most amusing thing, Tommy thought, during the last moments he could truly be concise enough to even exhaust a solid thought... The most entertaining thing is when he was on the edge of death, his family was mingling right next to him without a care in the world.
Maybe it was the fact he was dying in front of all these people too? Who knows.
As he stumbled forward, hand pressing into the fabric of his blouse like it was some sort of lifeline, Tommy let out a choked sob that caught the attention of one specific man in the room.
He felt the eyes of his brother piercing through his very soul, heard the desperate footsteps tap against the floor, the questioning tone of his father.
The comforting voice of Technoblade slowly drifting softer and softer, a voice whispering sweet nothings into his ear laced with sadness. The feeling of hitting a warm chest, an embrace that Tommy had craved ever since he reached the wretched age of seventeen.
His eyelids drew shut, the throbbing feeling of his brain punching itself finally disapparated. His body strayed away from the warmth, colder and colder, he could see himself practically reaching out and trying to indulge himself to that warmth once again.
Instead, he woke up.
Tommy flipped the page of the book in hand, bags under his eyes showing truly how tired he was. He was twelve again, simply a child with curled locks who runs around the castle without a care in the world.
No responsibilities of a prince, a bright smile that everyone wanted to give the world to.
At least, that's how it should be when he's twelve. Many people would assume this would be a chance to start again, to play the game over and fix the wretched fate he was shoved toward.
Twelve years old was full of misery and rainy clouds though, endless days staring out his window at the snow and wondering if he ever made a sound when he opened his mouth.
A year ago was when Tubbo left him, used and manipulated him to join the royal family. The day when he realized as a prince, he could trust nobody. The first year he was truly alone, the year he realized that the family laughed more when he was not present in the room.
He was simply a decoration for his father to flaunt, a boy with looks so exhilarating but a brain so not.
He never really visited the library in his youth, a choice he really regrets looking back. The book he was reading was quite a delight, a prince and a princess running out of sight from the wicked old witch who wanted the throne.
The book he had read previously was a bit more complex with its plot, a girl died hated by the empire and was reborn as a loved commoner girl who was secretly the princess. She went on to build a harem and live the life she never got to live before.
A plot that was so different but so similar to Tommy's predicament.
He saw how the librarian was eyeing him, sizing him up in wonder. Dirty blonde locks of hair messed up which he often ran a hand through, calculating green eyes trying to pierce through Tommy's soul, break out his deepest secrets, and put him together again.
The man was around as old as Technoblade, possibly nineteen at oldest? Quite young to be a librarian, but Tommy was also too young to be reading these types of books, so it balanced out.
Tommy glanced up and gazed at the librarian looking at him in wonder. "Hello, sir."
The man seemed taken aback by his calm and polite demeanor at first. Tommy wasn't like this, he just... It would work out better for him if he did put on a mask of obedience.
"Good evening, your royal highness." The man let out a small bow, sounding quite forced and refusing to meet Tommy's eyes.
"I'm Tommy. What's your name?" Tommy asked, both in curiosity and the fact he had to build connections if he wanted to live to eighteen. A librarian didn't seem like a lot at first, but the librarian was always in their own little world, someone you couldn't control.
That was threatening in itself.
The librarian paused for a moment before clearing his throat. "Dream, your highness."
"Don't call me that!" Tommy chuckled, trying to put on his best twelve-year-old act, placing the book onto the table in front of him and leaping off the chair. He bounced toward Dream, a gentle smile painting his face. "Nice to meet you, Mr. Dream!"
"Your highness... I cannot simply refer to you by your first name. That would be disrespectful in many ways." Dream replied, stumbling back into the bookshelf, arm hitting the wood the furniture was carved out of.
"I don't mind!" Tommy giggled.
So they sat together, the librarian Dream showing the youngest prince of the kingdom the wonders of the library.
It reminded Tommy of the touch he could never have.
It became a frequent thing to visit the library for Tommy, nobody questioning where the youngest prince was running off to. That was until Technoblade decided to stop and read for a while.
He didn't notice the man sitting cross-legged at a table, watching Tommy pull on Dream's arm and convince him to browse with him in the fiction section until Technoblade crooned a tune that was slightly threatening in Tommy's opinion.
"Techno!" Tommy gasped, the man keeping direct eye contact with Dream as he turned a page.
Technoblade was always training outside, how come he was here now? It seemed like he had just returned from said training, hair tied back in a low ponytail and fingernails chipped from holding onto rough weaponry.
The man who saw Tommy collapse first, who whispered to him that it would be alright.
"What... Is this?" He inquired, looking between Dream and Tommy. The blonde let go of the librarian's arm, skipping toward where Technoblade sat and propping himself up on the table.
"He's my new big brother! I've officially adopted him into the family like Phil did with Tubbo!" Tommy cheered, his biological brother furrowing his brows and letting out a small snort.
"Heh, nice joke. Seriously, why are you so touchy with him? He's a plebeian." Technoblade closed the book gently, tucking strands of hair hanging loose behind his ear before allowing his fingers to graze over Tommy's hand. "He's going to dirty you..."
Tommy forgot how Technoblade detested servants and commoners, with the exception of Tubbo, saying they contaminated the royal family. Something about blood impurity because they can't keep their treacherous hands to themselves and instead chase after nobles to be satisfied?
"He's my new older brother, Technoblade. He's different, like Tubbo!" Tommy argued back, the librarian standing there looking oddly satisfied for some reason. He had a smirk painting his face, so Dream was cocky, huh?
"You already have an older brother though!" Technoblade protested, more desperation in his voice than Tommy had ever heard, excluding the whole poison thing. Tommy winced, surprised at how loud Technoblade's voice boomed through the library.
"Your highness... If I might suggest for a moment..." the voice who started this all piped in. "Perhaps don't shout in front of the young prince? Childrens' ears are quite sensitive, after all."
Dream spoke with grace, more elegant than Tommy has heard the man before. Technoblade scowled, hands slamming down onto the table. "You dare order a royal around!?"
"Technoblade!" Tommy called out, fingers not touching Technoblade's arm to tug on it but still drifting near, pulling the fabric of his sleeve instead. "Leave it... Please..."
"You called me Technoblade... Not Techno?" His brother questioned, Tommy, biting down on his lip and staring away, refusing to look up at his brother any longer.
Technoblade was never this... Protective? Why start now....
"Tommy, you're never allowed to step foot into this library again." Technoblade commanded, Tommy letting out incoherent blabbers of protest as Techno simply glided out the room holding onto his hand firmly.
"I'll be back later, Dream!" Tommy called out behind him.
"No... No you won't..." Technoblade corrected.
Why was he doing this? Only Technoblade would really know...
Technoblade wouldn't give up on his brother this time, a real eye-opener seeing him die in front of him. He used the power given to him once, to reverse time. He wouldn't let some stupid librarian in an even stupider green vest get in the way of his and Tommy's perfect life again.
That stupid librarian dared poison Tommy in the first life and dared befriend him in the second? Even if Dream didn't know what he did the first time around, Technoblade did.
He would never let Tommy be subjected to that fate again.