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Patrols used to be different. Ladybug used to look forward to it, especially the ones at nighttime. Those were special: there was something about the City of Lights beneath them, the whiteness of the moon framed by the darkness of the nights, lighting the dim canopy of stars. Even when the weather was bad, she enjoyed it. Jumping in the rain reminded her of the day she received an umbrella from a boy she had misjudged; it reminded her of falling in love.
What she liked the most was sharing those times with her chaton. She didn't want to admit it to him, but as time went by, she'd found herself getting fonder and fonder of that bubbly cat-boy. He was always so happy, so exuberant in the way he joked, in the way he jumped around, in the way he spoke to her, in the way he loved her. He was… effervescent, like the tastiest fruity champagne to pop open for important occasions.
Not anymore.
Ladybug didn't know when it happened, but her chaton had... changed. Slowly, he'd lost his exuberance and bubbliness. His effervescence had died like a fizzy drink left to waste. She thought she would've appreciated him 'maturing'. That she would've liked to not be pestered again with roses, to not have her thoughts interrupted by ill-timed puns. But she was wrong; her heart ached at the realisation. She wanted her minou back, but she didn't know how to approach the matter. She didn't know if it was wise to approach it. She only knew that she had to.
"Since everything looks clear, I'll go home," muttered Chat Noir absent-mindedly after a quick round of patrol. A very quick round. "I still have things to do. Good night, Ladybug." He made to extend his baton, but froze when his partner put a hand on his shoulder.
"Wait, chaton. Can you sit with me?" She sat at the edge of the rooftop and beckoned for him to do the same. She saw the doubt in his eyes, but he eventually caved in and sat down. They stayed silent for a long time, looking at the moon playing hide-and-seek behind the many clouds in the autumn sky.
"What's wrong, mon minou?" She gave him a sidelong look and noticed his surprise.
"What do you mean, Ladybug? I'm good," he lied, but the way his gaze backed away from hers didn't convince her. It only made fear grip her heart in a vice.
"Did you think I wouldn't notice?" she asked bitterly. "You're a shadow of yourself. No more puns, no more nicknames, no more… anything that made you, well, you. I used to love patrolling, chaton. I don't anymore."
She glanced at Chat Noir's face and was surprised to see a jaded look in his gaze. "I thought you didn't like the nicknames, and the flirting." He started swinging his legs nervously and looked down, the frown on his face as harsh as the previous gleam in his eyes.
Ladybug sighed. "I just didn't like your timing. But, Chat, you know that I love your sense of humour. Please don't change the subject. What happened to my bubbly minou? I miss him so much." As she said that, her voice cracked and a single tear wormed its way down her mask. She looked at Chat Noir with glassy eyes—he wasn't completely unaffected by her breakdown. But there was something, something she couldn't quite put her finger on…
He looked up and changed his position to fall on his back. "I'm… tired," he said, but when he glanced at her, he noticed her disappointed look and sighed; she either didn't believe him or thought he was trying to dodge the question again. He sat up, slouching his shoulders and looking down. "I really am, LB. I'm tired of feeling like a sidekick. Of being just a clown to you."
"You're not!" spat Ladybug, but he didn't even look at her.
"Don't get me wrong, I understand that the pressure of being a Guardian can be too much; I'm happy that you share your new responsibilities with another full time hol—"
"Is this about Rena?" she interrupted him again.
He winced and held up his hand in a non-threatening, but firm, gesture.
"Sorry, LB. It's always been me and you against the world. I've been with you from the start, and you've always said that I was irreplaceable."
She cupped a hand to his cheek and shared with him a look full of longing. "You are, Chat Noir. I could never do this without you."
He pushed her hand away. She looked at him with hurt in her eyes, as he growled, "Then why do I feel that I've been replaced? She's been helping you with the grimoire and has been there for you in a way that makes me nearly suspect that she knows who you are." Ladybug paled and started fidgeting with her fingers. Chat Noir's gaze hardened. "I knew it."
He stood up and dusted off his suit with his gloved hands; then he picked his baton and extended it, his gaze icy when he turned around. "Sorry, Ladybug. I'm done playing second fiddle. I'll prepare my jokes for the next akuma attack, so you won't get bored. Good luck with Rena Rouge."
He didn't see her eyes filling with tears as he propelled himself away. He didn't hear her pleading whisper, to stay with her, to not leave her alone. He didn't see her crying through the night into her pillow, unable to sleep.
Her intentions were good, but… she had messed it up. She hurt him by strengthening the wall between them and turning it into a thorny prison to protect her heart. Because, now that she lost him, she realised that she loved her bubbly partner. He had sneaked his way into that prison, and captured her heart so subtly that she hadn't even realised, until now.
And now... it was too late.