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Suna Rintaro realized he was in love on a dark, rainy Saturday and if he was being honest, the shitty weather might have prompted this sudden realization. Thinking back on it, Rintaro might’ve also fallen in love with the rain that day.
It all started, as most things did back then, with Miya Osamu.
They had morning practice on that cloudy January– or was it February?– Saturday morning and as they were getting dressed after showering Osamu, his best friend who happened to have the prettiest grey or maybe brown eyes Rintaro had ever seen, pulled him aside to ask if he wanted to hang out at his house after practice.
“We can watch some movies, ‘Tsumu won’t be at home so he won’t annoy us,” he said, bumping into Rintaro’s shoulder.
“‘Kay, cool,” Rintaro answered, picking up his bag and slinging it over his shoulder.
They walked out of the gym and Rintaro found himself gravitating closer towards his friend until their arms were almost brushing. Rintaro wasn’t a people person but he found himself craving Osamu’s presence, craving the casual touches that Rintaro had grown to associate with him just… craving Osamu in general more often than he’d like to admit, he did not know what to think of it, this need to be close to Osamu, but he also didn’t mind it much, Osamu was his best friend and Rintaro simply enjoyed his company the same way Osamu enjoyed his, they often spent their afternoons together playing video games, watching movies or lazing around. It was comfortable, as most things were with Osamu, and Rintaro liked comfortable.
When they exited the gym it was raining– no, it was pouring actually and Rintaro found himself cursing under his breath, he really hated the rain, it was cold and it made everything feel gross afterward.
“Fuck I didn’t bring an u–” he started saying, stopping in his tracks when he saw Osamu stepping out into the rain, looking back at him as if he were expecting for him to do the same.
“Osamu what are you doing?” Rintaro asked, raising his voice so Osamu could hear him.
“Feels nice,” was Osamu’s answer, which was a simple answer but Osamu liked simple.
“You’re insane ‘Samu,” he said but following him anyway, they had to get home somehow and as he walked next to Osamu the cold rain did feel somewhat nice, maybe it was because of Osamu.
“I just like the rain,” he answered a while after as he jumped on a little puddle that had started to form on the side of the street.
“Why?” Rintaro asked because he truly didn’t understand.
“It’s fun to be out in the rain, yer clothes get wet and ya get cold but then you go home and have a warm nice shower,” he started explaining, “'sides, staying at home on a rainy day lazing around is the best feeling in the whole world if ya ask me.”
Oh, Rintaro used to think that Osamu saw things in a simpler way, he liked food because it tasted good and he liked volleyball because it was fun but maybe he was wrong, maybe Rintaro was the one stuck in an oversimplified version of life. He didn’t like the rain because he didn’t like getting wet, Osamu didn’t see it that way. He liked rainy days because he associated them with warmth, with movies and blankets, with staying at home, with lazing around. I’d like to see the world through his eyes, Rintaro thought to himself, and maybe stepping out into the rain was the first step in achieving that.
“Also, mom always makes hot chocolate on rainy days…” he mused.
“‘Samu?” he murmured.
“Hmm?”
“C’mon, I’ll race you to your house,” Rintaro said before sprinting without waiting for Osamu to answer.
“Fucker!” he heard Osamu yell in the distance and Rintaro felt his chest bubbling with laughter, he was starting to see the appeal rain had, his clothes felt heavy and his hair was stuck to his forehead but Osamu was gripping the back of his shirt trying to outrun him and they were both laughing and running and panting and even though he was wet and cold all Rintaro felt was warmth. He could hear Osamu’s laughter and honestly if Rintaro were a writer he’d probably write about his laugh, about the way it made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside, maybe writing about it would help him understand those feelings better, maybe it’d just leave him even more confused. It used to be somewhat of a rare occurrence, hearing Osamu laugh the way he was laughing now; with his head thrown back and hands clutching his stomach, but it was happening more and more, Rintaro was usually there to witness it and oh, it was a sight to behold. They stepped in puddles and laughed and slipped multiple times but Osamu was laughing and Rintaro was too and he kinda felt like his chest was going to explode but in a good way, being in the rain for once felt like pure, unadulterated joy.
By the time they arrived home they were completely drenched and shivering from the cold, a few new scrapes adorned their knees. Osamu called his mom who was at home so she could bring some towels for them so that they don’t make a mess when entering the house. She opened the door for them, handing them the towels and taking their wet shoes so she could put them to dry in a warm place. The boys wrapped themselves in the warm towels and stepped inside and it was warm.
“You can shower first,” Osamu offered, toweling Rintaro’s hair to dry it a bit when he noticed he was shaking from the cold. Rintaro’s face warmed up but it had nothing to do with Osamu drying his hair.
He took the offering, and a couple of minutes later he was standing underneath the scalding-hot water stream, as he warmed up he thought of Osamu. And then Rintaro got it. Osamu associated the rain with the feeling of warmth, of being bundled up in blankets sheltered from the cold, Rintaro, on the other hand, associated warmth with a certain grey-haired boy. Osamu made Rintaro feel warm whenever their hands brushed together, Osamu made Rintaro feel warm whenever he brought him lunch because he knew Rintaro often forgot his at home, he made him feel warm when they shared a bed on their afternoon naps, he made him feel warm on hot summer evenings spent outside trying how to skate and failing, laughing without a care in the world.
If Osamu loved the rain, maybe that meant Rintaro loved Osamu; he loved his laugh, his hands and his eyes, especially in the morning when they were a bit more hooded, sleepy soft eyes that Rintaro sometimes felt himself getting lost in when he should be paying attention to class. He loved how passionate he was about food, how he liked to stay in and watch movies all day, and he especially loved the way Osamu loved the rain.
I love Osamu , he told himself. The realization should scare him but it really doesn’t, I love him because he’s warm, he’s warm because he’s Osamu.
He turned the shower off and stepped out, drying himself quickly and putting on the clothes Osamu had left outside of the shower for him; a slightly oversized hoodie that was soft and smelled like Osamu and some slightly short sweatpants that were soft on the inside, that made Rintaro happy for some reason. Osamu and fuzzy clothes made him happy...
Osamu was waiting outside of the bathroom and he whispered a little “hi,” when Rintaro came out.
“Hi,” Rintaro said back, feeling warm and all bubbly inside, unable to hide his smile. A little smile but still, a smile.
“You can wait in my bedroom while I shower, I’ll be quick,” Osamu mumbled, standing up and entering the bathroom.
“‘Kay.”
Rintaro entered the twins’ bedroom and sat down on Osamu’s bed. His heart was beating quickly and his chest felt bubbly with something he couldn't exactly name, maybe euphoria? He felt effervescent for some reason. Maybe it had something to do with being in the bedroom of the person you love? Maybe that’s how love feels, like electricity running through his veins but at the same time like coming home, like calm afternoons after rainy days. He laid down on Osamu’s bed, a bed that was familiar to him, he had fallen asleep on it many times, sometimes Osamu was beside him and sometimes he wasn't. Just like that, curled on his side, he dozes off, lulled to sleep by Osamu’s smell.
After a few minutes or maybe hours he was shaken awake by a gentle hand and a whisper of his name. He opened his eyes and only to be greeted by the boy that managed to steal his heart in the short span of three years. His hair was fluffy from the shower, he had an old hoodie on and he looks warm.
“Rin, you didn’t dry your hair,” Osamu said as he picked up the towel Rintaro had dropped on the floor. “You’ll get sick, c’mon I’ll help ya,” he added, extending his hand for Rintaro to take, helping him up.
Rintaro stood up and his legs felt wobbly– maybe because of all the running, maybe because he just woke up or maybe because he just realized he’s in love. He felt as if he were walking on clouds.
“C’mere,” Osamu said as he plugged in the blow dryer and sat on the edge of his bed.
Rintaro obeyed without really thinking about it, kneeling on the floor between Osamu’s legs. Osamu rubbed his hair with the towel first and then started blow-drying it, carding his fingers softly through Rintaro’s hair, sometimes scratching with his nails a little bit, making Rintaro shiver.
He could've fallen asleep right there, kneeling on Osamu’s bedroom floor with Osamu’s hands on his hair, with Osamu taking care of him in a way that’s so intimate it makes goosebumps rise all over Rintaro’s body, it makes his heart hurt in the best way possible. Osamu turned off the blow dryer and Rintaro expected him to take his hands off his hair but he didn't, he continued to brush it with his fingers, occasionally tucking some strands of hair behind Rintaro’s ears and chuckling softly whenever he made Rintaro sigh.
It was almost overwhelming, almost way too much but at the same time not enough and it made Rintaro wonder if maybe, just maybe Osamu loved him back. The way he touched him, so tenderly, so loving, made it a little bit hard to believe Osamu didn’t love him the way Rintaro loved him, the way Osamu loved the rain because of its warmth.
“You’re like a cat, Tarou,” Osamu mumbled before taking his hands off Rintaro’s hair.
Rintaro made a little noise as an answer because he was kinda scared of opening his mouth and saying something stupid like please don’t stop touching my hair or I think I'm in love with you.
“D'ya still wanna watch a movie?” Osamu asked as he helped him up. Their hands lingered, making Rintaro question whether Osamu also feels those sparks at the tip of his fingertips or not.
“Yeah,” he answered, stretching his arms above his head like a cat.
“‘Kay, you choose the movie, I’ll make some hot-chocolate,” Osamu said as he looked through his closet in the search for some fluffy blankets.
They both headed to the living room, Osamu handed Rintaro the blankets and padded to the kitchen. Rintaro wrapped himself in one of the blankets and made himself comfortable on the couch, browsing through Netflix as he waited for Osamu. He eventually picked Labyrinth which made Osamu laugh, they had watched it like three times already.
“Again?” he asked as he placed two giant mugs filled with steaming-hot hot chocolate on the table in front of the couch.
“I like the goblins,” Rintaro mumbled, scooting to the side to make space for Osamu.
“I know…” Osamu said before sitting cross-legged next to Rintaro.
“The marshmallow to hot chocolate ratio seems a bit… off,” Rintaro teased as he picks up his mug.
“There’s no such thing as too many marshmallows Rin,” Osamu retorted before wrapping himself in a blanket and picking up his mug, getting comfortable.
Rintaro pressed play once Osamu was ready. Labyrinth was one of his favorite movies but this was the first time he didn’t make it past the ten minute mark without getting distracted, call it the I just realized I’m in love with my best friend who’s sitting next to me wait, is he closer than he was before? effect.
Quietly watching the movie just wasn’t happening tonight, so he settled for quietly watching Osamu instead. He had never just like, stopped and stared at Osamu the way he was doing now; he knew he had slate grey eyes but he had never noticed the little specks of dark brown on his irises. He knew Osamu was objectively attractive; he had the body and the face and he liked to cook which apparently was a plus for many people, but as he stared at him now Osamu seemed to be turning more and more beautiful before his eyes by the minute.
As if he sensed Rintaro’s gaze on him, Osamu turned to face him, “whatcha’ looking at?” he asked and he was smiling.
“Beautiful” Rintaro thought to himself, averting his gaze from Osamu’s. Suddenly he felt really nervous, his cheeks were warm and he knew it had nothing to do with the hot chocolate.
They both returned their attention to the movie but Rintaro found his gaze wandering again, this time a little bit lower, catching on Osamu’s lips. Rintaro had never kissed anyone before so he had no idea what that felt like but suddenly all he could think of was pressing his lips against Osamu’s; they probably tasted sweet because of the hot chocolate he had been nursing and they were probably a little bit rough. He had never seen Osamu apply chapstick before. How would they feel against his? What would Rintaro do with his hands? He could thread his fingers through Osamu’s hair, he had seen people do that in movies. He had never ran his fingers through Osamu’s hair before but for some reason he felt an overwhelming want to do it now, so he just did.
They were sitting side by side on the couch so he had to turn his body a little bit to face Osamu who at this point wasn’t watching the movie either, his gaze followed Rintaro’s movement and when his hands landed on his head Rintaro could swear he heard him sigh. He mirrored what Osamu did a bit earlier when he was drying his hair, he tucked a few strands behind his ears, he scratched his scalp a little bit, focusing on the sensation of Osamu’s surprisingly soft hair between his fingers.
“Rin?” Osamu whispered a few minutes later.
“Mmm?” Rintaro mumbled as he brought his hands down a little bit lower, until they were resting at the nape of Osamu’s neck where his hair was a little bit shorter. He liked how Osamu's closely shaven hair felt against his fingertips. He also liked the way Osamu was looking at him right now.
“Can I kiss ya?” Osamu whispered and Rintaro finds himself nodding instantly as if it were the easiest question to answer in the world.
They were facing each other completely now, both cross-legged on the couch. The movie and their hot chocolate mugs completely forgotten and when Osamu pressed his lips to Rintaro’s quickly and innocently Rintaro felt the way he had felt when they were running outside in the rain.
His chest felt bubbly and warm, his hands shook a little bit but he paid them no mind because Osamu’s were shaking too, and when Osamu pulled back Rintaro followed him almost by inertia. He pressed their lips together again, this time for a bit longer, until he felt Osamu smiling against his mouth which prompted Rintaro to smile too. Osamu’s hands– which were resting on his lap –moved upwards to cradle Rintaro’s cheeks softly.
They kept smiling and kissing and holding each other, Rintaro eventually got a taste of Osamu and he did taste like hot chocolate and too many marshmallows. At some point Osamu grabbed Rintaro’s shoulders and pulled him towards his chest, bringing him down with him as he laid completely on the couch. From his coveted spot against Osamu’s chest, Rintaro could hear his heartbeats and he wasn’t a biology expert or anything but they were a little bit quicker than normal, he didn’t worry though because his heart also felt like it was trying to run away.
In between Osamu’s arms he felt peace and warmth, the little four-letter word resonated on his brain like a mantra.
He kept it to himself for now though. Instead he whispered “maybe the rain isn’t so bad after all,” against Osamu’s chest hoping that he would understand and maybe he did, maybe he didn’t, but the last thing Rintaro felt before drifting off to sleep was Osamu’s arms tightening around his waist and a brief kiss against his forehead.
He’d never complain about the rain again.