Archive of Our Own ^beta

By the Archons, this hurt…

Diluc was doubled over on the floor of his cellar, arms wrapped around himself and hands clutching his sides. The ripping of fabric echoing every few minutes as his finger tore into his own shirt trying to deal with the pain. The redhead was sweating as an unnatural fever flared under his skin. Had he not thrown his vision away, the man would have thought that he melded with it. Having a living fire within him, scorching every nerve. He had not felt such a thing since the first time he was poisoned but there was no way that was possible inside of Mondstadt. There had not been an incident since his return.

The Alpha did not know what had happened. How it happened. Only that he was feeling the signs and symptoms of an early rut but something had twisted in his gut. Having Adelinde and Elzer, the two people that he trusted most among his staff, accompany him to the cellar to lock him away to play safe was the smartest thing he could have done because of this situation. Diluc knew what was going on but he couldn’t fathom how it was happening unless he was having a relapse…something that could have happened given his previous four year absence from Mondstadt.

Soon after his closest companions sealed the door the Alpha had made his way to the back of that room and fell against the wall. It was hitting him faster than he had anticipated, still it was not a rut in anything but scent. Not that he could tell anyone, the pain had him pinned to the ground faster than he noticed. Eventually, a fire began to run through his body and it was unbearable. Throwing his vision to the other side of the room he hoped that would cease the fire but to no avail. The burning sensation raged against his skin and there was no relief...like many times before it had Diluc wishing for deliverance from this unholy ache. He cried out in pain, releasing a growl that would shake the foundations and it wouldn’t be the first time either. That sound would emanate in the walls for hours to come.

So much time had passed and nothing had changed. The pain was steadily getting worse. The burning always felt a little bit hotter than before. There were a few blank spots in his memory but he knew he had to have hit something with how sore his knuckles were. He may have tried to hurt something and was thanking Celestia that he did the right thing but being locked in the basement. Choked whimpers tore from his throat when he could no longer suppress them by now his windpipe was raw from the coughing and howls he had been releasing when the pain became too much to bear. There would be no easy recovery from this, if he lasted that was. As far as the redhead was concerned, death was going to claim him faster than a cure would.

Diluc was praying for an angel of mercy to end his misery and all his mind could do was offer the illusion of his beau, Kaeya. Of course, his thoughts would go straight to Kaeya first. When didn't they? The two of them had barely begun seeing each other again. They were really only a few months into being serious again and their reconciliation barely half a year old. Late nights, hidden away from everyone. They had talked more and more, getting comfortable around each other yet again. Both had changed so much but there were still a few things that had stayed the same. He still remembers Kaeya’s smile from when they both agreed to date again...

That beautiful smile...

‘Kae…I wish you were here…’ thought the Alpha, as his memories drifted to another time he prayed those exact same words before his senses blackened and he passed out.

Diluc had just set out on his journey, he was maybe three weeks into it and already far away from the safety of Mondstadt. He left in a rush, a bug-out bag had already been prepared due to his training; it would have all he needed in it for a few weeks at least. As much as vengeance ran through his veins his heart did ache a little on what he had done. No one knew of his departure...he made sure no one did. He didn’t need people trying to talk him out of it if they knew. The only thing he left was a letter for Adelinde and its contents had been mainly on how to conduct business while he was away.

In the letter he also told her to keep an eye on Kaeya for him but would understand if the younger did not want to keep contact with the Ragnvindrs. He never went into detail but he did say that night when she tended to the wounds inflicted upon Kaeya were of his doing and he didn’t want to hurt the other anymore. Diluc was adamant that the Omega was still under the protection of the clan...but something had happened between the two of them, a shift in dynamics and Kaeya may not stick around. If that were the case, then let him leave.

He would not force Kaeya to stay.

In that short amount of time after he first set out on his quest, the young Alpha found himself crossing blades with a Fatui Agent. The first time of many fated meetings. They were after the small stone that Diluc was using in lue of his Vision. That placed the Ragnvindr heir on guard instantly. What the Fatui wanted with it was not known to the Alpha at the time but he was not going to give it up. It was the only thing he had that connected to his father’s demise and thus far he was not willing to part with it. The Agent didn’t take lightly to that, a fight then ensued and the Fatui had not sent their best, the agent was easily dealt with.

But in the scuffle the redhead realized he had dropped something out of his pocket. Once his oppentant was taken care of. Diluc went to look for what had dropped. Any provisions were gold out here and he wasn’t about to leave anything that was useful. Seeing what he had dropped though caused him to pause, to freeze...he had not realized that item was in the coat he had grabbed when he left...he thought it had been in a different one jacket.

Out of his pocket had fallen a Calla Lily with a tiny blue ribbon tied around the stem, it was dried but still looked amazing for being in his pocket for all this time but the scent was long gone. Kaeya had given it to him a week before his birthday. Gingerly picking it up off the ground, the redhead stared at it in wonder. How had he not realized it was there? Tears gathered at the corner of his eyes as he bowed his head, the flower loose in his grasp. Placing it back into his pocket, Diluc trudged out of the area. He could stay too long, they would be missing their member soon enough to send people out to look for him.

After the realization that he still had something precious from home, Diluc found himself looking at the flower when he was at his lowest. He found himself caressing it when he was thinking of the past. Pressing a kiss to the dried petals when the regret he felt was so thick he felt trapped. Playing with the little ribbon when the redhead felt helpless. That Calla Lily became his anchor, even if the owner no longer loved him, that little flower would get him though.

That little flower, though, brought a darkness of its own...because it was a reminder of that night in the rain. A rain that haunted him...

Thoughts of that night haunted him more regularly as he drifted from place to place. His self-appointed mission swallowed him whole. This mission continued further and further…taking longer and longer. The weeks became months and months turned to years. The redhead's thoughts continued to drift back toward who was once his mate-to-be. Kaeya...after the initial shock and pain Diluc regretted his actions, it was one of the reasons he abruptly left home. Sick with guilt, these feelings also kept him from reaching out. He was convinced that the Omega would want little to do with him anymore. Not that he would ever blame the other. He doubted Kaeya would want much to do with him.

Not with what he has become.

That guilt he felt, Diluc bottled up. He pushed the feeling down and it was suffocating but he wasn’t worthy to feel anything but that anymore. Not until he had results, only then would he allow himself to breathe. This course of action changed him on the outside. It made him a colder person than he had been before. Gone was the sunny Cavalry Captain of the Knights of Favonious and in the ashes rose the controlled burn of murder of the shadows. The cold exterior masked the burning flames of revenge with indifference.

The Omega would never see him as a loveable person again. All this weight continued to crush him and mock him. Diluc had buried the young man he once was and Kaeya would never know the reasons. Even with the new facade, the Alpha couldn’t find the strength to send a message to anyone. The pain that caused him was immeasurable and was only used to attempt to re enforce the walls. That pain meant he couldn’t even reach out to the one person that had been his world. It never stopped his thoughts though.

‘I wish you were here with me, Kae.’

That line punctuated everything. Every time the Alpha took on an enemy, winning barely by a thread, he thought about Kaeya. Every moment of down time he had, a shimmering pale blue eye decorated with stars amongst a curtain of navy blue silken hair danced through his mind. The redhead was still consumed by what he could no longer have and it made him ever colder. He didn’t deserve the Omega but it was so hard to stop thinking about him and how the Alpha had fucked everything up.

As much as that little dried lily was an anchor it was a curse but one Diluc would willingly burn for. It was all he had and he would kill for it. He couldn’t believe he was careless enough he almost lost the last little bit of Kaeya he had left.

In the years he had spent away he found that his interactions with the Fatui had taken on a bigger role, more than they wanted the stone Diluc was in possession of. He learned it was called a ‘Delusion’ and that they were supposed to be used for the Fatui only. Somehow, his father had gotten a hold of it and it obviously led to his death. This lead his to target the Fatui but it didn’t lead him into something as stupid as heading deep into enemy territory. Though it didn’t mean he was safe...

In his wandering there were several encounters with Fatui that left the Alpha feeling uneasy. It alway happened around his ruts, a cause for concern if there was one. Not to mention having his ruts come earlier than expected. Instead of the normal cycle the redhead had when he was back in Mondstadt many came early or he had more than he naturally should have. As with any of the ruts he would find a small cavern and lock himself away, just to play safe. It was good he had taken these precautions because there were side effects from some of those ruts he could not explain.

There were times he would black out and didn’t remember what had transpired. Other times he did remember and Diluc knew he was not in control of his actions. Each time though…when he came around there were dead Fatui littering the grounds around his supposed safe area. Sometimes he could remember sinking his sword into their bodies or ripping through flesh with his teeth when they tried to make a grab for his head. The Alpha couldn’t bring himself to be disturbed when he did remember everything, they deserved it for approaching him when he locked himself away..

At the end of the rage filled the supposed rut, when Diluc could manage to look over the corpses...he never found any evidence of an Alpha in the mix of bodies that had attacked him. No, only Omegas and Betas...that fact alone made the redhead begin to question if he should really be out here by himself anymore. The only blessing was that no longer was Diluc alone in his quest, he had people to go to and in time he would.

After a particularly violent episode, the Alpha got a hold of his contact in The Underground, the information network he had become a part of after they saved him from a trap the Fatui set up...one that almost cost him his life. ‘Menschilch’, his contact, was told everything after they met up in a secure location. The man himself was greatly concerned about what had transpired and agreed that the Fatui were up to something. Receiving a scent repressing cloak and scent blockers from them, it helped keep Diluc off the radar. It was really the only thing they could do for him because if had been getting drugged at such frequency anything else might have a negative reaction on him. They would have to have the Alpha attempt a detox.

Still, even after those close calls Diluc continued in his mission. He had to find more than he had already. The redhead did not want to return home with nearly nothing to show for it. He did not have the culprit's head on a platter. It wasn’t good enough. He needed more so he continued searching, looking, seeking. That is how he ended up on the borders, looking into a secret bunker. There could be something there that could help him in his quest.

He never got the chance to really look into it however.

The Alpha had followed a lead about the Fatui to the edges of Shezhnaya. Going into the country was near suicide for him but the boarders were safer and they often had facilites this far out of the way. As he was edging closer to the supposed hidden facility the Alpha felt a pinprick on the back of his shoulder. Reaching back he tore out a dart, one which had deposited it’s payload. Dropping the used dart to the ground Diluc had summoned his claymore as footsteps headed toward him. The snow crunching beneath many footfalls as the Alpha stood his ground ready for them. Out of the treeline and from behind boulders many Fatui appeared. It was obvious that this had been a set up...

Diluc readied his weapon as his senses faded to black, a blackness that he knew was going to aid him.

Once he regained his senses...the man looked around the area. It was scorched. When he was in such a state it seemed he had no sense to stop. He will continue to kill something even if it is far past dead. There was no way anyone was going to think there was an accident of any kind. The redhead was going to have to leave and quickly but as he looked over the field...his heart suddenly sunk.

There amidst the carnage was his Calla Lily...it had fallen out of his pocket while he was long in rage. Sadly, unlike the time before, the flower did not escape unscathed. The stem had all but burned away taking the little faded blue ribbon with it. The 1 inch nub of the stem was all that was left. Flames were licking at one of the extended petals burning the edges as it continued to get closer to what surely would erupt into fire if anymore real contact was made.

Dashing to the down flora, Diluc was able to salvage the only keepsake he had. The snow easily subdued the fire. Cradling the damaged Calla Lily in his hands the Alpha whined a little. He never thought he would be so careless after he found he had this. Standing slowly, the redhead meandered off the scene. He had to find a solution to the new found problem before something like this happened again.

After that, he stopped and picked up a small metal case to keep the lily in. It wouldn’t come to any more harm if he had a choice.

His missions continued for another year before he ended up in another trap. This time, the Underground had sent their best to back him up but it was almost too late. The Squadron of Seven, as they were known as, ended up dragging the Alpha out of the bunker where this trap had taken place. The Underground had received information about this planned attack but with no one in the area to get the information to Diluc they immediately sent out a rescue party. The best they had. Diluc was lucky they had gotten there in time, as the Fatui already had him unconscious, caged and they were filling needles with different liquids...obviously they had plans for the Alpha. Plans that would make his skin crawl.

As Diluc awoke he found himself face to face with ‘Menschilch’ once more. The man let out a breath he had to have been holding, running his hands through his hair. From what the Alpha could conclude this again was a time he was lucky to have been taken care of by The Underground. The act that he was fully bandaged again clued him into what had been going on. When his contact grabbed the clipboard, that had a hefty stack of paper on it...the redhead knew he was going know exactly the damage he had sustained.

Laying there ‘Menschilch’ gave him a run down on what happened to him. Also the Squadron had grabbed everything they were going to use on him. Many of them are drugs that would include a rut. There were even some that would force a heat on an Omega. Either they were planning on using an Omega in heat to entice the Alpha while drugged or making one out of Diluc caused the redhead to freeze. He had not thought things would have gotten to that point but he couldn’t put anything past the Fatui...after all if they wanted it they would do anything to get it...and right now their sights were set on Diluc Ragnvindr.

Cold terror sank into his veins. Once again he found himself wishing that his mate-to-be was there...even knowing Kaeya would no longer be such a thing. Maybe only seeing him as a friend if the Alpha was lucky... It didn’t stop him from yearning for the security he had with the Omega when he was younger. ‘I wish you were here Kae...I need you…’

“Are you really planning on dying out here?” ‘Menschilch’ started, crossing his arms and glaring at the redhead. Everything was plain as day that his life was going to be in danger for the foreseeable future, there was no escaping that. Yet, they still felt that there was more he could do and didn’t want to end everything so quickly. ‘Menschilch’ had an idea though...they needed someone of standing in Mondstadt...Diluc’s mother country. With Diluc also being in the upper tiers of The Underground it would work out to aid them all. After discussing what his role in the Underground would be from now on and confirming that they would still be in contact, did the Alpha conceded.

Finally...Diluc was convinced that he should return home. He needed the safety of his home once more and hoped that what he wished for would still want him back, in one form or another.

The journey back to Mondstadt was not easy. The Squadron of Seven personally escorted the Alpha as far as they could. Mainly sneaking the red head out of Sheznayan territory but stuck with him as they travelled from various counties in their attempts to lose any Fatui tracking them. There was a time they visited Fontaine four times to lose a tail. Sumeru was a total of five. The Fatui were relentless in their hunt for the Winery owner. They ended up killing a good number of them so the Squadron could keep Diluc out of Fatui hands.

His boat had finally landed in Liyue Harbor, he felt some relief. Diluc had made it this far but it was not over yet. The Squadron asked him to wait for a little while so they could clean up some loose ends and from there he would work his way north. Diluc may have been settled on returning home but he wanted to make sure that there were not very many people to witness his arrival. It came down to timing everything, so of course he was heading back when at the end of tourist season. Just busy enough, he wouldn’t be suspicious but not too busy to where an accidental reveal was possible. The Squadron’s requests fit his time frame, so of course he agreed. Biding his time in Harbor for a little bit, until the signal from the group came in.

Once the end of the tourist season hit, the redhead was ready to get going, the all clear had been given to him by the Squadron a few days earlier. He knew they would stick around as long as they could but he did try to make things easier on them. During his stay in the Harbor, the Winery owner had systematically gathered supplies for the trip home. Basic camping gear and other such things. It would be a long walk but he was ready and had a plan. The first part of the trek would be the longest but he would rest at Wangshu Inn, staying a couple nights there. After all, there were very few places safe enough to rest and he would have to push his way through to the Inn. Treasure Hoarders were ripe in the area and he didn’t want to be ambushed by them when he thought it would be good to rest.

As much as the Alpha was ready to leave, part of him would miss Liyue Harbor. It grew on him a little bit. The time he spent at the Harbor had also calmed his nerves about returning home. Part of the redhead felt as if he really didn’t have a home to return to with how he left. Those thoughts however would have to wait till he did make it back to his birth country. He took his time in the city of Liyue Harbor composing himself. There was just something about the city that centered him. As here at the Harbor as much as he was out of place, he wasn’t. It was just another traveler as they were concerned. That though was it, Diluc was just another traveler...

Only when he felt comfortable did Diluc get ready to leave the city, signalling to the Squadron that he was indeed going to head out. The few weeks he spent in the city, the Alpha was debating back and forth before finally settling on returning. He knew he had to go but would he have to make his presence known? He wasn’t going to back down from the agreement made, he was just unsure of how he would go about things. Many nights were wasted caressing the damaged dried calla lily, dreaming of the past. The end was that he missed his home...whether or not his home missed him was another story but he wouldn't figure it out unless he returned. Finally, stocking up on some food stuffs from one of the local vendors, Diluc turned and made his way out of the city. Back to the wilds he knew so well, under the watchful eyes of the Squadron of Seven, who wished him a safe return.

Getting to Wangshu Inn...was an adventure to say the least. If something could go wrong, it did. Diluc had to stop by numerous posts to rest because every enemy and their grandmother were out causing havoc. Many times, Diluc camped out by a guard post to sleep, at least if something attacked he would have warning. The monsters were never this bad when he had operations to run. Why now when he was working on going home was there a problem? Did the universe hate him or something?

Still, the Inn was a welcomed sight. Checking in, Diluc headed to his room and proceeded to collapse on the bed with a groan. Everything ached terribly and the tell-tale signs of another cold were setting in, he has had enough of them that the redhead just knew he was going to be in for a long ride. It was a good thing he did stock up on some medicine while he had the chance. Pushing himself up, Diluc grabbed the ‘Do Not Disturb’ sign and put it on the door handle before he retreated to the bathroom to clean up. If he did have a cold setting in, the redhead would rather deal with it once he had cleaned up and eaten something.

After getting to sleep...the man didn’t remember anything till a few days later when he woke from the worst of his illness. He remembered a housekeeper coming to check in on him after the sickness set in. Yet, after that there was not much he could remember. He was feeling better than he had before but still needed more rest and something to eat. Thankfully, with it being the end of the touring season the Inn wasn’t terribly busy...meaning he was able to afford to rest for a few days more.

Checking out, Diluc apologized to the Front Desk attendant and apparent Boss of the Inn for his overstay. Thankfully, she understood and with a knowing smile she explained. Telling him he didn’t look too well when he first checked-in, he was a little pale and sluggish. So, she was sure he may have been staying an extra couple days then originally planned. When the housekeeper went to check on him, the Alpha had been giving off the scent of sickness. The Boss made sure to keep others out of the area. Paying for the extra days the redhead bid her and her head housekeeper farewell, after another bout of gratitude and made his way to the elevator.

Setting out from the Inn at about ten in the morning the Alpha, now feeling better continued his way home. The remainder of the trek took a good part of the day. It would have only been a 14 hour walk to reach Stone Gate at around midnight but with all the monsters that lined the roads that needed to be dealt with...he wasted an extra 4 hours dealing with creatures and helping people along the way. It was four in the morning by the time he got there and he needed to rest. Again, what was stirring up the monsters, Diluc didn’t know.

The elderly woman serving tea took pity on him and had Diluc rest up along the cliff wall while she kept an eye on him. She could tell he had just gotten over a sickness and told him to rest up. The woman was telling him about her children and grandchildren and how she just knew that he wasn’t feeling good. Her stories had put the Alpha to sleep easily enough while she watched over him. A knowing smile graced her lips as she watched him sleep...as if she knew that story would do the trick.

He slept a lot, he may not have been as fit to wander off from the Inn as soon as he originally thought. Either that or his recovering body had been unable to take the strain that he had put himself under when he aided people or took care of some of the monsters that crossed his path. Diluc had woken up a few times before now but the elderly woman always talked him back to sleep before he could think of moving. It was like she had planned it that way or something.

Waking closer to noon, it was high time to get going again. The Alpha just had another 8 hours of sleep, be it broken sleep, he was still feeling better than he had before. Thanking the elder and paying her for her time, after all she did not need to do what she had for him, the man walked away from Stone Gate and back into Mondstadt...where his future would unravel for him.

The walk was, for the most part, going well. A few minor enemies here and there, nothing major. A lot better than whatever was going on in Liyue. He stopped to get some fresh water from the stream and ate a little bit. Everything was fine until he was further in the Mondstadt side of Stone Gate, a wave of nausea started to settle in, by this time far too familiar for his comfort. He had just rested and shouldn’t be feeling this way. Was it because of the exertion he had been placed himself under? He hardly felt a few slimes and hilichurls would not have constituted for something like this happening.

Diluc would not stop going forward though. If he was going to fall ill again he was going to do it back at the Winery. This was leaving him uneasy with how frequently he had been getting sick. None of it felt natural anymore. Unfortunately, his uneasiness was aided by the fact he felt he was being watched the closer he drew to someplace that he felt was safe. All that did was push the stubborn man further.

Each step though was harder than the last. Often Diluc found himself leaning against walls and hiding in the shadows when unknown figures strayed too close. They never stayed though, chased off by something or someone else. Who or what...he didn’t know and prayed it was one of the Squadron. They had not agreed to see him this far but if he were not making times that he should, they would check in. That would ease his mind as his body was not co-operating. Walking a straight line was difficult as the uneven dirt path beneath his boots was worn down with divots. Somehow he managed though and made it to the outer edges of the Winery. His end goal in sight.

It was early morning by the time he was making his way up the dirt path to the Winery, the sun peaking out over the fields of grape vines. His cloaked form caught the attention of many of the field workers. Some even noted the Alpha stumbling and was going to offer assistance up to the building. Diluc waved them off with a nod of thanks, telling them he’d be alright. They didn’t recognize his voice, as it had deepened and any tone of the light hearted youth he used to be was gone. Thus far his cover was not blown.

His workers, though, were still as good of people as when he left them. They did not help as requested but kept an eye on him till he made it to the entryway of the building. From there Hillie and Moco watched on worry ingrained in their features. That only lasted until he opened up the door and stepped inside. Closing the door behind him and shutting out the fretting gazes as well.

The interior looked exactly like he had left it. The familiarity seeping deep into skin as he looked over what he could from the doorway. When he left Mondstadt, it was from the city and he had not visited the Winery before leaving either. The last time he stepped inside the Winery...was a week or two before...before his birthday. Leaving everything behind and protecting what he could. The Alpha had the house sold in the city before leaving, as he did not want the Knights peaking in on his people, after all they could not be trusted. So he had the household relocate...the Winery was easier to secure. His people would be safer here than the city.

Diluc’s thoughts were interrupted by the sound of approaching footfalls and focusing his attention back on the present, he recognized them. As if he had never left.

Entering the building got the attention of the Head Maid, Adelinde. She was the most competent person he had ever met. Being a Beta just continued to aid her level headedness as she did not have to worry about the dramatic hormone swings that Alphas and Omegas had to deal with. She raised both him and Kaeya as much as his father had. She was like a mother to him despite her young appearance. It made the young Alpha smile a little.

“Welcome to Dawn Winery, are you by chance here for a tour? Or do you have an appointment?” She asked, obviously concerned about the cloaked figure. He was slouched over a little and his breathing came in heavy puffs.

“Adelinde?”

“Do I know you?” the Beta asked, clearly taken aback.

With that question, Diluc reached up and slowly took off his hood. Red hair cascaded down his shoulders and there was a sharp intake. Looking at her now, with his brilliant ruby irises, the Alpha laid himself bare. He wasn’t sure how well she would take to him appearing out of nowhere but...honestly, he has had worse than this.

“Master Diluc!” exclaimed the blonde, her grass green eyes widening and she broke protocol completely and ran to the young man. She hugged him tightly when she reached him, like there was a chance he would disappear if she did not. He returned the gesture, though his was stiff and not as much of a reflex it was in the past. The last four years had left him more touch starved than he was willing to admit. The Alpha felt the Beta tighten her arms around him...as if she understood.

Their touching moment though was interrupted by another familiar and reliable face, Elzer. The silver haired Beta came stumbling over from the nook that was his office, poor man must have tripped over the desk or a chair on his way over. His blue eyes widening at the realization that indeed, Master Diluc had finally returned home. Rushing up he joined the hug before Adelinde pulled away allowing the Chairman to have his own hug with the young Alpha. After a moment Elzer pulled back resting his hands on the heir’s shoulders admiring just how he had grown. The Beta had always been like an older brother to him as he was slightly younger than Adelinde but older than Diluc himself.

Giving the two a small smile, the Alpha began to relax. He was among people he could rely on and felt safe around. Diluc for the first time since he left had a sense of security that was priceless to him. If anything his journey had made him all the more thankful for this moment. Opening his mouth to say something, to tell them anything at all but was stopped by that odd feeling raising its ugly head. That’s right...he had come back sick. He then pitched to the side, barely catching himself on the wall. Alright...all those plans were going out the window at this moment.

“M-Master Diluc,” stuttered the maid as she moved forward to try to stabilize him.

“Adelinde...I-I don’t feel well,” was all the Alpha managed before he collapsed in front of the two that had just hugged him a moment before. His sight betrayed him, darkening around the edges of his vision before blackness was all he could see...Diluc was sure he could hear his head maid shriek and his manager’s worried voice but...they were very distant. Soon that same shade of black had overtaken all his senses and he knew no more.

His private doctor from before he left had been summoned and sworn to silence. The man was familiar enough to the heir that his scent would no cause the other any distress. The Alpha was very sick. Nothing that would be life threatening but no one knew the cause of his illness and the doctor was sticking around to monitor the situation because with Diluc collapsing on them so quickly...worry was high.

When Diluc woke he really had no choice but to explain. He had been feeling a little under the weather and had stayed a few nights at the Wangshu Inn before coming back to Mond. After the stay, he felt better and headed for home. He had been very tired at Stone Gate and caught some more sleep there. It wasn’t till he passed through Stone Gate that he began feeling horrible again but since he was so close to home it made more sense for him to push himself to get home than to turn around and head back to Wangshu.

The doctor did say what he did given the circumstances that Diluc did make the right choices. It just seemed to be back luck that caused a relapse of the illness. After all, the Winery owner had made good calls before hand; stopping to rest, taking medicine, staying hydrated...whatever caused the illness was waiting for any little chink in the Alpha’s immune system and wealsed in. If anything the redhead would have one hell of a time getting his system regulated again.

For the first month he was back he would get sick every few days and then recover only to be wracked with illness once more. It was all agreed that his return should be kept a secret to keep people from bothering him whilst he recovered. That started off as a good idea, a good plan but it didn’t last long. When he was feeling on the mend for a week without any relapses, Diluc was brought up to speed on everything. The one thing that stood out, Charles had been working the Tavern alone the entire time that the Ragnvindr heir had been gone. That didn’t sit well with the redhead.

After having a small argument with Adelinde, Diluc was leaving the building with a thin leash. Were it not for the scent blocking cloak from his travels, he would not have been allowed out the door. After he had thrown his cloak on, the visible shock on his head maids face was his trump card. She couldn’t find his scent until she was right up on him. He had to come clean and told her what he could. That for a while he had backers that knew he was being hunted and this was one of their ways of protecting him because he was valuable.

The Beta sighed but relented. She was not pleased but he would have fought to leave the building if she didn’t allow him to leave.

Gathering a horse from one of the staff members, Diluc promised he would be back soon. He was just going to go check on Charles and return to the winery as quickly as possible. His cloak had not been retreated to dampen his scent but it was still effective with what solution remained on the material seemed to be doing its job. It was a more viable option than many other options, with how he felt taking the scent blockers would have made him feel sicker than he was already. For one night this would work.

Getting into the city was easy enough, there was little in the way of hilichurls or anything else on the road that could have caused him to be inconvenienced. Once at the City came into view the Alpha pondered on just where he would leave his steed. A young lad on the bridge gave him an idea. He left his horse with the young boy, named Timmy, outside the gates of Mondstadt. This wasn’t supposed to take very long and it was not night time yet. The sun was setting and by the time he returned to the child it would be dark. A few mora and some food for the pigeons outside had the child agree to watching his horse. Diluc did not want to deal with using the stables if he had to make a quick escape for whatever reason.

Walking through the gate and onto the stone streets had an air of familiarity to it. Even the clicking of his boots on the stone sounded the same. Nothing much had changed, a few new faces and some that have aged dotted the streets. Gracefully, maneuvering through the crowds of people, the Alpha had made his way to the Angel’s Share. Diluc was glad to see that it was still running but hearing that Charles had been meaning it 24/7 was not what the owner had wished to hear. The business was not going to go belly up for being closed a couple days out of the week.

Entering the Tavern was like taking a step back in time. Not much had changed if anything. It looked almost as good as he remembered. Finally, there was something he could latch onto. There was still something from his memory. Stepping upstairs, ignoring the bar right away, something that had to have caught the barkeep's attention. Which was good for him because Diluc didn’t want to have this conversation where anyone could hear. After all, thus far no one knew he was back and he wanted to keep it that way.

As he ascended the stairs he took note that the second floor was vacant, it was after all the middle of the week. Good, some people still had work ethic and didn’t waste their time in a bar. As he maneuvered over to the corner he had occupied in his youth, when he wanted to be alone and his father was busy...or after training the new knights it was nice to have a sanctuary even if he didn’t partake in alcohol. He remembered Charles covering for him; he just wanted to disappear for a while.

As he sat down at the table in the corner, a familiar scent invaded his senses. Heavy smell of Calla Lilies, entangled with a touch of fresh fir and a miniscule smell of mulled spices. There was also a very faint undertone, an addition of Lampgrass that was not part of the original smell but added to the blanket scent of the lilies. He knew that fragrance like the back of his hand. It was something he had not had the privilege of smelling in a long, long time. It was the smell of Kaeya.

Kaeya must use this corner a lot...The fact that the Omega came to Angel’s Share despite their past made the redhead a little happy. He was not going to think he ever stood a chance at rekindling their relationship...if you could even call it that, but he hoped to still see Kaeya again, maybe catch up with everything that had happened. That was his hope anyway and life had a way of letting him down so even that hope was as dull as a candle’s embers.

It was then the muffled name of the Omega he was thinking of drifted to his ears. Diluc couldn’t help but feel a little bit noisy. He could overhear the drunks in the corner below him, moving over to the opening in the floor to get a better listen was what he regretted. It took all of his strength not to use the delusion he kept on his person and burn the Tavern down. They were talking about Kaeya, the new Cavalry Captain, much to the surprise of the redhead but they were saying things more along the lines of who the Captain had been with the night before. Who Kaeya was sleeping with this week. How they would l.o.v.e~ a piece of that action. Each statement is more debauched than the previous.

Diluc’s grip on the banister tightened significantly and he heard it begin to crack under the pressure of his grip but he just couldn’t stop. He knew if he continued he'd have to replace the railing but he just couldn’t let go. He never even heard the approaching footsteps till the person was right on top of him. Anger was beginning to build up within him and-

“Excuse me, sir, is there something you’d like from the selection?” asked a voice that Diluc knew hadn’t changed much from his youth if anything it had only gotten a touch deeper. It was what he needed to come back to his senses, releasing the banister from his death grip.

“Charles?” the Alpha asked, pushing his hood back far enough for the tavernkeep to get a good look at him in the darkened area. Amber eyes widened slightly before the Beta took the man away from the banister.

“M-”

“Shh,” the red head shushed him. Motioning him to a corner, even further as he could still hear the drunks below. Diluc needed a distraction from that nonsense they were spouting off. There was no way everything they had said was possible. Kaeya would not just let anyone touch him, the last one they tried had gotten his arm broken...at least the last one before Diluc had left the country.

“Sorry, how are you doing? Shouldn’t you be resting?” Charles apologized for almost outing that Diluc was in town, all of his staff was informed of his return and asked to keep it on the down low. Almost blurting it out was not a good idea. Obviously, the owner came here in secret but the last brunet had heard that the young master was fighting a sickness that didn’t want to relinquish it’s hold on him.

“That is not of consequence. I came to check on you,” countered Diluc. He still cared very much for those under the flag of the Dawn Winery.

“What? Your health is more important than that,” urged Charles.

“Charles, you have been working 7 days a week for the past 4 years!” Diluc stated with expasteration in his monotonous voice.

“Not consecutively,” chuckled the brunet, “Elzer comes and gives me time off when he can. It is normally every 4 to 6 weeks or close to that but he makes it so I get nearly a week off when he can. He would alway be here for festival days as well so I wouldn’t get overwhelmed.”

That Diluc didn’t know. Adelinde must not have been in charge of that aspect of the business. So, that did make sense. He has not gotten a chance to check in with the Chairmen for a while, he was busy making sure everything was still running. Diluc was still sick, the Alpha couldn’t change that. He did need to rest, especially if he was going to be able to do anything with his staff around. They were worse than doting parents at the best of times.

“Once I am fully healed,” began the Alpha, “I’ll either find someone else to hire or come here myself to help. You more than deserve a break.”

“That is very kind of you, Master Diluc,” Charles began, adoration glistening in his amber eyes, “I will only accept though if you are fully recovered. I don’t want to see you here for at least another two weeks if not a month.”

“Fine, fine, I said that anyway,” grumbled the redhead.

“And I am merely enforcing it,” the bartend stated with mischief in his voice, “Before I see you off, did you need anything to eat or drink? You look a little pale…”

“Charles...on a good day I look like I have been living under a rock, of course I look pale,” deadpanned the owner.

“Not what I was speaking of, you still look sick,” the Beta replied trying his best not to laugh because of course Diluc was more open to those he knew he could trust and such little jokes were sorely missed but it was not the time for them.

“You could have just said that,” the young Master rolled his eyes, “Yes, I am still under the weather but I’ll be fine, I’m heading straight back to the Winery.”

“You better,” was the brunet’s reply as he then broke protocol to give the young man a hug. One that Diluc stiffly returned. He would learn how to physically relax around his staff again. Charles though didn’t question him on the awkward hug, probably once more informed by Adelinde on how distant the owner had become with his time abroad.

Parting with the faithful bartender, Diluc saw himself out through the second story door, darkness of night already encasing the city. In truth he just wanted to get out of there so badly. The drunkards and their stories angered him greatly, talking about Kaeya in such an undignified manner. He had gotten information that Kaeya had taken up his old position of Cavalry Captain but that didn’t much help him as some would think. It just meant that the Omega would be busy. The Pyro user would have to gauge carefully just how he would approach his old flame...he just didn't have any idea how to do so. Leaving the city would help clear his mind and hopefully put those horrid stories he heard to rest.

As he drew closer to the exit there was a ruckus and the Alpha sighed. Mondstadt was known to be the home of drunks after all, it was probably just that. He'd take a quick look and be on his way. Logically, it would be more suspect if he didn’t acknowledge that something was going on.

Stopping by the gate, Diluc tilted his head toward the commotion, making it look as if he was just surveying the scene. Of course Mond does not disappoint. There outside of the Good Hunter tables, a couple stairs down was the source of the commotion. It was some sort of stand off that ended with a couple knights dragging off either a drunkard for the night or something of the like. Yet it was the remaining one that caught his attention.

Long, beautiful, silky navy blue hair, as if someone had dyed a spider’s silken strands in the night sky. Bronze skin kissed with life, shimmering under the nearby lamplight. From this distance he couldn’t see what the man’s eye color was but he could see the telltale signs of an eyepatch. There was only one person that everything he saw matched too and Archons, Diluc was not ready to face him yet.

It was Kaeya...it had to be.

Gone was the conservative look that the young Omega had carried with him for so long, what Diluc had clung to in his absence. In its place was the clear picture of an Omega that was confident in their body and had to be the center of attention. An Omega that was either looking to impress a potential mate or already had one and flaunted their Alpha’s catch. The man before him was too dolled up for it to be a normal everyday thing.

The stories from the tavern came back to haunt him with vengeance. It couldn’t be, Diluc didn’t think Kaeya would have let himself fall so far to be used like that...but it was clear he was wrong. He was either whoring himself out or he had someone else in mind, a mate already picked out. His mind desperately hoped it was the second option because the Alpha didn’t know if he could understand the first. At least the second was something he was expecting to happen...

As his mind rushed to put the pieces in place he noted something out of the corner of his eye. Kaeya saw him. The Alpha cursed himself when he noted the other’s reaction from his peripheral vision, he lingered too long. The navy haired one froze slightly with recognition, his posture stiffening before everything sank in. That what he had caught a glimpse of was real...and flashed a flirty grin in his direction before he started trying to get through or around the crowd. His goal was obviously the concealed redhead.

Diluc turned and left, out the city gates, he didn't allow real eye contact to be made and acted like he never even saw Kaeya. After all, he made it look like he was just surveying the area. He made it across the bridge, gathering his horse from Timmy, before he even registered hearing ‘hey, stop’ being called out to him. Even then he did not turn around, quickly mounting his stead and riding off. Not even acknowledging he heard the other as he disappeared, the darkness enveloping his form as the footfall that had been trying to follow him suddenly stopped with his disappearance. A call of ‘Luc?!’ echoing behind him.

Diluc’s mind was in tatters. The voice that had called after him, the one that was trying to get him to stop was forgien. It was far too sugary than what he had been used to. Too flirty...too, too different. There was no familiarity to it at all, nothing that hinted at the past that was once shared. Never had it been so clear that his world had been washed away by the rain that night, so long ago.

His body and mind may have returned home...but his heart no longer had one...

When the Alpha returned to the Winery, he said he was retiring early and wished for no one to disturb him. Adelinde and Elzer could tell that there was something wrong but Diluc had made it to his room before they could ask. He knew they were worried and didn’t blame them but didn’t want to deal with everything right now either. He wasn’t in the right mind set. The young tycoon didn’t even remove his cloak from his person before he disappeared behind the thick oak door of his quarters.

Closing the door, Diluc leaned against it burying his head in his hands as he tried valiantly to hold his broken shell together. He wanted so badly to cry, to scream, to curse but he couldn’t allow himself to do so. That did not stop his breathing from becoming labored with the effort not to cry. Sliding down the door, his cloak bunched up behind him, the redhead couldn’t help but think about everything he had seen and heard...a painful reality that was so different from the memories he left behind.

The rumors he had heard in Angel’s Share about the Calvary Captain’s escapades the little time he had been there had churned his stomach. He knew they were drunkards but there was that saying ‘A drunk man's words are a sober man’s thoughts’. If anything, at least part of what was said was true. Just what did he think was going to happen while he was away? He knew the one he cherished so dearly would have changed, he just never thought that the Omega would turn into a toffer.

Then actually seeing him…it hurt, it hurt so much...but it was his fault. Everything was all his fault. This was what he deserved. This is what he would reap because of his actions. A sort of clarity had begun to set in for him after that. Letting his hand fall from his face and onto the ground, the young Master knew what had to happen next...

There was only one thing the defeated Alpha could do.

Sneaking out of his own Manor made him ache as he thought of all the times he and Kaeya had done the same thing years ago. This wasn’t for fun however, not like all the times before. This time there was something he had to do and he couldn’t do it with prying eyes, Diluc would have been too embarrassed. He had to for his own sanity if at the very least. It was more ritutal than anything and there was no guarantee that this would really help but he had to try. He owed it to Kaeya to try.

As he walked down the dirt path to a little secluded place on the property...one that he and Kaeya had called their own, he allowed his mind to wander. It was behind a great cedar tree that had been there for longer than Diluc could recall, right across from a sign that read Dawn Winery. Other smaller trees and shrubs had popped up in the years past and now surrounded their little hiding place. Keeping it from the rest of the world's view.

Going over everything in his mind, Diluc was sure that Kaeya had found someone else or was seeing multiple people. His scent didn’t smell like it had changed much, if at all. So, maybe he was waiting for the right time to settle down. Maybe waiting until Diluc came back to tell him...maybe hoping he would be happy for him. The Alpha would be...eventually. He would need some time but he wasn’t going to keep the other from happiness. It wasn’t right of him. Diluc would just now need time to heal, to actually heal...instead of holding on to something that was no longer in his grasp.

Walking behind the tree, the other foliage engulfed his form as he passed through. Placing a hand on the tree trunk as he walked around it to the back of the tree, the Winery Master feeling for those noticeable and familiar etchings.

There were two sets of carvings in the tree. One was when Kaeya and he were little. Just tiny pups with big dreams. The carvings were messy and had little finesse to them simple initials, a promise to be there for each other. The other set was made by a more refined hand, their constellations joined inside a heart shaped pattern of stars that too were connected. Again their initials on either side, a confession and pledge of love...a love that wasn’t as strong as it was once thought it seemed...

This would be the place...the perfect headstone...

Kneeling down at the roots of the great cedar, Diluc dug at the ground with his gloved hands. The same ground where they had sat years ago, promises made and kisses shyly taken. This place held so much for them back then and would now hold the remains of such a beautiful time in his life. Making a small hole, something slightly bigger than a child's jewelry box. It would have been easier with a tool but the redhead didn’t have the time or wish to risk getting caught by going to get one.

Taking out a small metal box from his pocket, the redhead opened it one final time. There inside was the dried Calla Lily that had accompanied him throughout his travels. The stem and single petal still singed and the color faded to an almost dull pale brown from the light orange it had been before. It was sitting upon a folded piece of parchment, a little note...the last thing he had added to the box.

Stroking the flower gently, Diluc closed the box. Locking with a key he would put to the side later with a letter when the time came. He would make sure Adelinde would know exactly where it was when he was gone. After all, with little to live for anymore...he couldn’t say he wouldn’t be more reckless in the coming years. He had his duty and oath he made to his father but once that was taken care of...well, no need to dwell on that for the moment.

Placing a kiss to the lid of the metal container, the Alpha felt his chest stutter and tears gathered in his eyes. This was it. It was time to say goodbye. Gently placing the box into the whole he dug just moments ago and with great care, the winery owner covered the box with the discarded dirt as tears ran down his face. He was willingly letting go of what had brought him a guiding light through his darkest times. It was time to set the Omega free.

He lingered a moment after it was all done, his hands still flat on top of the disturbed soil. Tears falling onto his gloves and fresh dirt, blurring out his vision as his chest staccatoed with every breath. There was part of him that wanted to fight it, dig up his most cherished possession and take it back to the winery with him but he stopped himself. It was time to stop being completely selfish. Leaning back and standing up he looked down one more time before forcing himself to walk away.

Diluc went back to the manor that night and cried himself to sleep. The letter he wrote repeating in his mind, bringing him only more sorrow.

‘To the boy I loved so dearly in my previous life, I wish you nothing but the happiness and love you deserve.

I hope one day you can forgive me but I understand if you do not. I cannot take back the pain I had caused you. I wish I had been a stronger person that day...that night... but I cannot turn back time to fix what I have broken. Not a day had gone by that you had not crossed my mind. I hope one day, when you read this...if you read this, I hope it is with a light heart and no malice in your life.

I will always love you, Kaeya. I had never stopped nor ever will.

With all my heart and soul,

Diluc Ragnvindr'

The next day was met with grogginess and an aching head.

He had after all cried the entire time he could remember before passing out. After all, he's working on giving up one of the two things that kept him going for so long. The first was vengeance for his father, that he had yet to follow through on as his quest led him deeper into the midst of the Fatui than even he was comfortable with. The other reason was Kaeya’s forgiveness for his actions that night...Diluc was not going to delude himself thinking he could have gotten his love back but maybe at least the closest thing to family he had left. At least that had been the plan.

Seeing how much had changed...that flirty smile...those stories...

Diluc couldn’t take it and if he had any tears left to cry he would have but he was wrung dry. He was not going to be able to stand being in the City. If he entered the mask of indifference would have to be inplace for him to be able to function. His schooled expressions were a life saver in the wild, never allowing his enemies to see him break. Now, they would be used on a very different battlefield. Mondstadt...he would be a liar if he said this was how he expected to use his abilities.

Piece by piece the plan was coming together. Diluc would keep his distance from the city, the winery would need his help as well hunting down more leads on the newer target that The Underground had assigned to him; the Abyss Order, it had always been a thorn in the side of Teyvat as a whole but some things were happening which were a cause for concern. That would help with a good part of the problem and keep his mind and body busy. Only going to the City when he really needed to. He’d help out Charles of course, the poor Beta having run the entire establishment himself for so long. That would be it, anything other than running the Tavern would be delegated to someone else. This would work.

Keeping his distance from the Omega would be an easier pain to manage. It would hurt, it would hurt badly but it would still be easier in the long run. Kaeya had every right to choose who he wanted to be with...who to love… It would help both of them if Diluc wasn’t there to mess things up for the new Captain and stir false hope into the Alpha’s heart. He already hurt Kaeya once before, he had no right to do it again.

His door opened, breaking his train of thought which was a blessing with the route it had taken. The Alpha had not unlocked the door, leaving it locked as he had used the window each time when he buried his keepsake. But Adelinde had a key for every room in the house, it was likely her. Diluc was proven correct in his assumption when the blonde Beta entered. Her face fell when she looked at him, he could only guess that he didn’t look like he was looking too good.

She walked over to his bedside. Giving him a questioning look the Beta was silently asking permission. Nodding, the woman sat down near his head and asked if he was alright. He’s been better was his only response before waiting a beat before asking what brought her to his quarters.

Adelinde stated that the Acting Grand Master and all available Captains had stopped by this morning to welcome the young Master home one of the Captains had noticed him in the City the night previous. A low key but apparently long awaited ‘welcome home’ from the City. That was not the morning news he had been expecting to hear. Diluc’s eyes widened with fear as his plans to keep his distance were slowly starting to fall apart right before his eyes. Seeing his panic, the head maid continued her explanation.

She politely turned them all away, saying that he was not available at this time. Before anything was said about she implied that Diluc shouldn’t have gone to the city in the first place. She stated that Master Diluc had arrived the night previous to last night and had not rested, throwing himself straight into work. It took her hours to get him to relax and that didn’t last long. When he heard that poor Charles had been manning the Tavern on his own this whole time...he couldn’t stop himself from being worried about him and going to check in on the Beta, not thinking about the extra strain it would put on him. So currently, Diluc was sleeping and she would not have him woken up.

That was enough to stop the Knights from prying. From what he was told, it made Eula give a light huff of understanding, Albedo nodded, Jean smiled light and asked to be alerted to when he was better, also asking if they needed to send Barbara over to have a look at him. To which Adelinde declined politely, saying sleep was the best thing for him and the young healer would not have been much help. Kaeya though was stone faced, he nodded but other than that said and did nothing that would have allowed a glimpse into his mind...only that he was somehow not pleased at what he heard. For whatever reason that could be.

“I’m sorry,” she said, breaking the silence. Her hand reached over from where she was perched on the bed and began running her fingers through his hair in that motherly way she always had, “I should have warned you about certain changes.”

“It’s not your fault, Adelinde…” murmured Diluc as he laid back down. She never stopped the ministrations though, as the Alpha’s mind lingered in what had happened. ‘Certain changes’ meant how much Kaeya had changed. Somehow, she knew Diluc had not been prepared to see how much his former companion shifted in the time the Alpha had spent away from Mondstadt. The blonde Beta may have figured it out after his return to the Winery.

“I know...but it doesn’t dismiss the feelings.”

“Yeah…” whispered Diluc in agreement, he understood how that felt.

“You know he keeps in touch with Elzer and I correct,” she said with some trepidation in her voice.

“I do now…” murmured the drowsy young Master, “It’s fine...I’m glad he had someone...I just-”

“Just what?” Adelinde asked, pushing him to finish his sentence.

“Please, leave me out of it. I don’t belong there anymore.”

“Master Diluc-”

“Please, Adelinde...I can’t…” he managed to get out, tears clinging to the corners of his own eyes. Watching the beta he noted her eyes widened a bit before something akin to pity began reflecting in her emerald eyes. Whatever it was she thought of, Diluc knew she didn’t hold this decision against him, even if she didn’t agree with it.

“As you wish, Master Diluc,” she replied, a tinge of sadness interwoven into her words. He could tell that she was not happy with him. It was clear this was not something she wanted but would not force him to change his mind. Something had happened. What it was, she didn’t know and he wasn’t going to tell her.

“Thank you,” the gratefulness in his voice was heavy and the head maid continued to pet his hair until he was asleep again. Sleep was his only refuge, where the memories of a happier time still lingered as clear as crystal. Of a hand entwined with his own and a promise to never let go.

Dreams were far better than the shattered reality he was forced to live in.

Diluc began to come around. He wasn’t in any better condition than when he had first passed out from the intense pain he was experiencing. Now though he felt damp, like he was sitting in a pool of water. Blinking open his eyes, even though his vision was blurry...that was exactly where he was. Even in his semi-delirious state, the man was sure he had not sweated enough to create a pool of water but the oppressive heat prevented him from looking around.

Curling in on himself to try to protect himself from the heat that not only raged under his skin but seemed to be scorching his lungs. It was as if the room he was currently trapped in was on fire. There was no way that was possible, Diluc had not used his Vision, he had tossed it away when he thought it was reacting to the heat in his veins. He wasn’t sure why he was tasting ash in the air, all his brain could register was that it was hot and bright.

The fog that enveloped his brain was making it hard to focus, he was drifting between the present and the past. Memories tha long haunted him, his missteps and mistakes were mixed with the burning ache he was feeling. Yet he knew where he was, the basement of the Winery. Everyone as far as he knew was safe. Adelinde and Elzer had followed his instructions to the letter. Yet, he was remembering the years away from Mondstadt folded in between the most recent ones. Why was he remembering all of this? Is this one of the steps in death? Where you have to live through your past again? Seeing you life before your very eyes before embracing the end? Did he have to re-live that pain?

There was still so much to remember and he didn’t have the heart to do that. Not when he would have to witness his own cruelty to Kaeya before they were able to reconcile. He never wanted to be mean...he just, for the longest time he felt Kaeya was better without him. So pushing him away had to be the best thing for the Omega...

Fate said otherwise though.

The terror he felt alone in his travels was sobering, it reminded him many times that he was a small gear in the working of the world but he learned a lesson from it. Remembering walking away from the Omega the first time he saw him after all these years did hurt. The memory of giving up the keepsake was down right the most painful thing he had done in recent time. Those times were not kind to him but he did grow from the experiences...still, he had more to trifle with than he cared for even after that night.

A couple weeks after the initial visit from the Knights, the Alpha was feeling he was better, Adelinde had once more gotten a hold of his physician. A professional opinion was the only one that would slide and where the Alpha understood it was still inconvenient. Checking with the doctor to make sure that Diluc did indeed have a clean bill of health was the only option he had. Begrudgingly, he waited for the doctor.

Once he was cleared his first line of business was to head straight to Angel’s Share. Charles and he had to work out a schedule so Diluc could cover for him. The man deserved some time off. Slipping into the City was easy. He still wore the cloak the first couple meetings. It saved him the hassle of dealing with many people when he was just starting to come back into society. He and Charles came up with a compromise. Charles would shadow the heir until he felt comfortable to be doing this on his own. It could be seen as he was checking up on the business and it’s flow while he helped out Charles. Not that the Alpha was trying to re-learn something.

Initially Diluc wasn’ going to care about his image but the Bartend reminded him just who he was. The Alpha was going to have so many problems when it came to Omegas and Betas throwing themselves at the Winery owner. Many people still wanted to be that lucky chosen one. That was not exactly what the redhead liked to hear. Those points were hammered home the first time, Diluc spent more time in the bar with a checklist acting like he was doing inventory behind the counter... The first day when people had gotten whif that Diluc was back in town, many flocked to the Tavern and Diluc had been able to vanish into the 3rd floor bedroom a few times when it became too much. After that he offered the Beta bartender a raise for dealing with all of that flawlessly.

When Jean caught him at the Tavern one night working behind the bar, she seemed stunned. Normally, today was a day Charles was scheduled but he had been shadowing Diluc and when the redhead said he was comfortable allowed the other to leave early. Still, the shock could have been from pure surprise, she obviously was not expecting him to be here. He had not sent word that he was actually okay. Diluc knew it would have gotten out eventually but it had taken a few weeks. How disconnected were the Knights from the people and information? It really took them this long? Keeping it to himself as she approached the bar, it was clear she was here for a reason.

“Master Diluc, I wasn’t aware you were in town,” she began, smiling as if she were addressing an old friend... “When we went to visit you, we were told you were under the weather.”

“I was informed of such,” Diluc stated as he continued to man the bar, “Adelinde relayed to me what she had told you. There was no lie there if that is what you are worried about.”

“It is good to see you are well,” Jean continued, the lack of emotion the man had in his voice had caught her off guard. He could tell that from the way she looked at him with questions in her gaze but she continued forward much to the dismay of the redhead. “I was worried when you vanished all of a sudden those years ago. May I ask what happened?”

“My reason for leaving is no concern of the Knights,” he countered and said nothing more.

“I see,” the blonde replied, she was deeply concerned about his lack of empathy, he could tell. She was looking for someone that no longer existed. The Diluc of the past was a bright young man, a shining light amongst his peers but the one before her had become worn and didn’t seem to care about what she had to say. Jean was getting a little flustered at the lack of response. “What about as a friend? I was worried for you. All of us were.”

“Were you really? Last I know of there was nothing from you or your Order or even the City that hinted of any remorse for the actions against me or my family. Never an inquiry made. My people would have told me if there was. As long as the wine still flowed, no one was ever concerned for my person.”

Diluc had stated that as matter-of-factly as he could. Adelinde and Elzer had brought him up to speed on everything. There was little to no inquiry to whether or not the young Alpha had made contact or not. Whether he was alive or not. Only Kaeya had asked and that was on a personal level, he was not acting as one of the knights at those times...but even that had faded after the first year. The past three he had not asked at all. After that, all that was asked about was the seasonal wines and if they would be making a new kind. It was obvious to Diluc no one cared for him as a person...they were after his status and money. No better than the Fatui but at a smaller scale.

“Master Diluc, surely you don’t believe that?” Jean asked astounded...the redhead could smell the surprise. Which it came from he was not sure. Surprised to be called out or surprised that his people were that loyal? It didn’t matter at the end of it all.

“From where I am standing there is little you have to gain with small talk, Acting Grand Master, What do you want?”

“I will not lie, when I heard you were here I did come down for a reason,” she began and right away the male Alpha knew he was not going to like where this. She may not have been expecting to see him but she was prepared if he had been. Maybe dismissing Charles was not a good idea. “With the actual Grand Master leaving on an expedition and taking most of the knights with him, it has left the remaining Knights in dire straits. I am here to inquire if you were ever going to rejoin the Knights of Favonius with your return?”

There was nothing but silence between them as Diluc carefully cleaned another glass. That verbal stillness stretched on for minutes as the red head continued to clean glass after glass. Jean was awaiting an answer and the Winery owner had been doing his best to trample down the rage that was building at the sheer audacity of the request. After what the Knights did to his family, they were hoping to simply sweep it under the rug and place the Ragnvindrs back under their thumb? Never again.

“I fail to see a good reason for you to be here then, Acting Grand Master,” Diluc said simply and stiffly, as he turned and put away the glasses he had been cleaning. He managed to get his outrage under control a touch but he knew Jean could tell he was angry.

“Master Diluc, please consider it at the very least,” she asked quickly as if she had already expected this response but was still willing to try once more. After all, the Knights and the Ragnvindr family had a connection for a long time, she must have been banking on that connection but that didn’t have any weight anymore. No, as far as male Alpha was concerned that tether was broken.

“There is nothing to consider. My old position is already filled, there is no place for me if I wished to return,” Diluc countered just as fast as he turned back towards her to grab a few more of the dirty mugs to clean, “Even if there was a vacancy that was held for me, my answer would still be the same and that is no.”

“Why will you not at least take some time to think about this?” pushed his former friend.

“The Knights of Favonius have already betrayed my trust once,” the Alpha began as he ceased his actions, glaring at the woman who kept trying to change his answer, “I will not allow them to do it again. You think your Order clean but putrid blood still runs through it. Parasites still linger but will not show their heads until they are in a position to breed. A position of power is all it would take for their numbers to grow and the Knights known incompetence has allowed it in the past. It is only a matter of time before it happens again. I refuse to be part of something that cannot be kept pure.”

Diluc knew his words were decisively a blow against everything that the redhead of old held in high esteem. Jean recoiled slightly, not ready for the venom the young Master had initially tried to hold back for her sake. It was obvious, the betrayal that the Knights had handed Diluc all those years ago had left him bitter and his view of the Knights would never be a positive one again.

“I-I understand your position, Master Diluc,” the blonde Alpha replied with some hesitance laced in her words, she was unsure of where she stood with the male Alpha now. This was not the young man she used to tease in years past, whatever had happened to him out there beyond Mondstadt had morphed the redhead into someone she didn’t know. Someone she would have to learn all over again, if he even gave her the chance. “I’m sorry to have disturpted you but do know this at the very least. I am happy to see you have returned...even if I failed to show it properly in the past.”

With that the blonde Grand Master made her way out of the Tavern and disappeared. Diluc knew he scared her off. He didn’t bother looking as she left. It was better this way...no one from his past should have to deal with the shell of a person he had become. When he happened to look up and his gaze drifted outside of the window he caught the sight of navy colored hair passing by. Taking a breath he steadied himself. Diluc knew that exact shade of that hair, it only belonged to one person. Whether it was a blessing or a curse...Kaeya never entered the bar that day.

He wouldn’t see him for a while until Diluc took a more stable schedule at the bar.

The Tavern was the only place that the redhead would see the Captain and it was difficult but the Alpha made sure it would be that way. It was the safest option for the both of them. All Diluc cared about was the safety and happiness of the other...

Adelinde and Elzer did tell him when Kaeya was due to stop by the Winery. Honoring the promise made. Once a month, Kaeya would come out to visit. Sometimes it was just to catch up and others to share some of the gossip he heard around the city. Diluc would make sure he was gone from the Manor the night before and returned in the early morning of the day after. Staying the two nights at Angel’s Share in the third floor bedroom, arriving in the city when he knew Kaeya had gone back to his quarters to get ready for the next day. The Captain always turned in early the day before. It was obvious, he loved the little meetings he had with Adelinde and Elzer.

Diluc swore was not going to intrude on their group and time. Not going to severe that link Kaeya had pain staking preserved. The redhead did inventory and worked at the bar on those days, it was enough of an excuse that people didn’t really question it. Sometimes one member of the Squadron of Seven would pop by to relay some information to him about the Abyss Order or pick some up. They often hid in the form of traveling merchants that were on route between nations. A little out of place but nothing that seemed too out of place.

Some days both Betas would tell him that the Cavalry Captain had asked after him, when he returned the following morning. Asking how he was...asking when he’d be back...asking if he could see him. At first this surprised him, after all the past three years there had been no inquiry what-so-ever and now after every monthly meeting there had been one. He was confused. Yet, Diluc never asked any questions about it. He just assumed this was what happened because the Knights wanted information and who better to try but Kaeya. From what his two most trusted employees had said though, the Captain had not been asking because the Acting Grand Master told him to. Still...the redhead declined every time.

Regret and sadness was heavy in the halls when Diluc was questioned over and over again, if he would ever stay for one of the gatherings. All the Alpha ever said was he didn’t trust himself and didn’t want Kaeya to think he wasn’t welcome by one wrong word said. Neither could argue with him...after all, Diluc as he was now had lost the verbal eloquence he once had when he was younger. He could very easily scare the Omega away without meaning too. It was the best cover available because as much as he trusted Adelinde and Elzer, he was no longer sure what to believe when it came to Kaeya. Diluc didn't want them to know how much he still questioned the sincerity of the questions the Captain asked...the Winery Owner just wouldn’t say anything.

Diluc continued to avoid the Omega where he could. Keeping the arrangement where he only saw the Kaeya at the Tavern, a couple nights out of the week, it was hit or miss whether or not the Captain would allow him a peaceful night or not. There were nights where Kaeya would get his drink and leave to the back corner, observing everything, those were the mostly peaceful nights until it was closing. Other nights he sat right at the bar and it was a guarantee that Diluc was in for a rough time. Poor Charles, bless his soul, had to deal with an extremely distant and cold Alpha when he was there on the weekends to help out.

That had continued for a while and for that while the redhead was fine with how it all went. It would be better if Kaeya would just forget about him, move on, he had a life here that was better than what Diluc could offer him now. He had the love of the people of Mondstadt and the admiration of so many. Yet the Omega kept coming and kept pushing his buttons to the point Diluc had to close the tavern early on a couple occasions, staying in the third floor room as well. Not wishing to risk another confrontation. The needling the navy haired Captain put him through the Alpha could only handle in small amounts.

Kaeya seemed to realize this also. It didn’t stop the Omega either. Whatever the Captain had in his head seemed to be analyzing everything that the other did. Which buttons could be pressed and which ones couldn’t. That was what occurred most the first year the Alpha had been back. Then there was the whole fiasco with the Fatui around Ludi Harpastum where the two of them needed to work with each other. After that Diluc was expecting everything to go back to how it was before. It didn’t and that was startling. There was one moment where the Alpha had gone out of country on a business trip and upon his return he was informed that Kaeya had visited the Winery multiple times after the first few days of him being a no show in Mondstadt. That was surprising. Though it did give him the knowledge that if he did not go to the City at all...the Omega he was avoiding would come find him. Great.

Things took a turn that Diluc wasn’t expecting a couple weeks after his return. Kaeya abruptly started to flirt with him...greatly. Saying he was shocked was an understatement. The first time it happened the Alpha froze, he could only count his blessings that he had his back turned to the other when the first line dropped so the surprise was not visible on his face. Not that it stopped the onslaught of questions that burst into existence. Why bother flirting with him of all people? After everything that the redhead had done to him? After leaving for so long with nary a letter to even let anyone know he was alive? Didn’t he have a following of ever eager people that the Omega could have his pick of?

All of these questions and he didn’t have an answer. He could only hope it was just a joke and it would end soon. It was now a trial of patience. One that Diluc could feel himself slowly losing.

The Alpha was hoping that after each rejection his former love would get it in his head that going after Diluc for whatever reason was a waste of his time. Yet, Kaeya just kept after him. Aether came into the city and the situation with Divalin took center stage...still the Omega continued to key in on the redhead. Offering nights alone together. Tempting him with promises of gentle kisses and soft touches. Kaeya never hid it from anyone that he was intentionally chasing the Alpha, which was something that most Alphas would have died for. Just not Diluc. Again and again, Diluc shot him down. He wasn’t going to be a bed warmer for someone he used to have such a connection with. Then those rumors...Did Kaeya have someone waiting for him or not? The Omegas behavior was just so confusing.

There was constant back and forth and it never stopped. That inevitably led to the biggest fight the two had besides that night before he disappeared from Mondsandt. Diluc had just taken out a newly erected Hilichurl camp, when clapping came from out of nowhere. The Alpha’s hackles were up when he turned and found on the far side of the camp was the Cavalry Captain slowly walking towards him, he was supposed to have turned in already.

He should have known better as the other man had begun to trail him more and more. The redhead turned away and was going to head off before the Omega could get close to him. It was then he heard Kaeya speak up about giving Diluc a ‘reward~’ for all his hard work. Something he was sure the Alpha would ‘thoroughly enjoy~’. That made something snap inside himself and he turned glaring daggers at the Knight.

“Why is it so hard to understand that I want you to stop?”

“How about a reason?” countered the Captain casually, as he stepped around the body of another enemy that had fallen by the great blade of the Alpha. “You have yet to really give me one. Other than being difficult but you always have been, haven’t you?”

“Are you truly so near-sighted?!” snarled the Alpha.

“I may only have one useable eye but my vision is still crystal clear.”

“After everything I did to you!” Diluc shouted, his voice rising, catching the Captain off guard and stalling the Omega’s strides toward the redhead. “I hurt you! I left you! I did everything in one moment I swore I would never do to you! You can’t trust me anymore! I can’t trust myself anymore! I feel as if I let my guard down for a moment, I'll hurt you again! I can’t risk that, Kaeya! I deserve to be alone till I die for what I’ve done to you!”

For a few heartbeats...everything was silent save for the Alpha’s heavy breathing from the yelling he had done.

Eventually, what Diluc had shouted sunk in. The redhead felt himself pale and a sick feeling over took him. As he took in the shocked look on Kaeya’s face, he knew his own shock was visible for the Omega to see. He never meant for the other man to find out, he never wanted the other to know how much the Alpha felt he had failed. The verbal admittance hurt deeply but Kaeya should have already known all of this. So what was with the look on that delicate face? The Navy haired Captain as looking at him with such surprise that it made the Winery owner feel even worse than he already had.

Diluc couldn’t think. He couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t stay here...

He ran.

Diluc ran all the way back to the Winery taking out anything and everything around him in a fit of rage. How could he have let himself slip? How could he have been that loose lipped? It had been 2 years since he had returned and nothing pushed him to the limit as much as Kaeya had. Now he just revealed how much he was at fault. The Omega should have already known how much of their fallout was the Alpha’s fault, so why did he look so surprised?

Getting back to the Winery, the man stumbled in his energy gone. The hunting spree he went on after fleeing from the Omega had left him drained and the situation he fled from made him feel hollow. There was no way he was going to be able to get back to the city the next few days Luckily, they were already ones that Charles was working on one of those days, Diluc was just there for back up if needed. Mainly paperwork the the primary concern of his visits but he would even be useless for that with his mind now a mess.

He left a note for Adelinde. He has been dealing with a bad headache and is taking a few days off. The redhead then left the main room and headed up the stairs. Making his way to his room, Diluc cursed his luck because what originally started as an excuse was beginning to throb under his temples and an ache that stretched behind his eyes. Great, the last thing he needed was a migraine. Charles would have to take his shift if it wasn’t gone by morning...

Seems like life wasn’t on his side because when Adelinde came to check on him, Diluc had his head buried under multiple pillows and the curtains were still drawn shut. Yeah, he had been lovingly gifted a migraine from the universe. Archons be damned...

Roughly 48 hours later, Diluc had staved off the worst of it and had managed to do some paperwork he had to catch up on because of the ill timed migraine. He was in his office with the curtains still drawn closed and candle light in the middle of the day...direct sunlight would have wreaked havoc on his recovering head. His only interruption was when the head maid came in with a bouquet of lampgrass already placed in a vase.

In the dim room the lampgrass was a welcome addition, the blue glow a beacon in the darkness of the room. Questioning her gave him the insight that the delivery of the bouquet was a commision that Aether had picked up from the Adventurer's Guild, it was simply to have the flowers dropped off at the Winery. The young Traveler was not sure of the sender but because there was no ‘from’ on the outside of the envelope.

Adelinde set both items down on the desk before leaving the room again. Diluc would address the sender when he had time. Normally, keeping personal items to the bottom of his to-do list was his common course of action. Curiosity was stronger though and took hold moving the redhead into action. He stood up and nabbed the letter that was set beside the vase. It was a pale blue envelope with a wax seal, cementing the contents closed so no one could take a peak without it being noticed. On the opposite side was his name scrawled in black ink.

‘Diluc Ragnvindr’

Clearly, it was for him, the ink on the outside of the envelope arched in an elegant script...a script that he knew too well. Leave it to Kaeya to send it with the young Aether. He knew Diluc felt almost a parental responsibility when the young blonde was concerned and that the boy wouldn’t be turned away at the door. The Cavalry Captain was being smart when it came to the delivery of the gift this time around. Opening the tinted envelope the Alpha pulled out a single piece of parchment, folded only once. Parting the edges of the letter relieved the contents.

Sunshine,

I do hope you are actually alright and have not ‘taken ill’ as everyone is saying. I want to apologize for being too forthcoming. I was not aware how responsible you held yourself and am sorry for seemingly glossing over your feelings. I meant everything, it wasn't a tease…
I want to talk about this. I want to have a conversation with you about this, please. I promise I will abide by your wishes if you give me this time and you still wish to keep your distance from me but I want to understand.

Please, just once, can we talk.

Kaeya

The red head dropped into his seat stunned at what he was reading. He never entertained the idea that the Omega was being genuine about everything. He thought it was all proding to see just how far he could push Diluc. Other than that, he was not completely clear on what Kaeya had been trying to accomplish. With their parting Diluc assumed that the Omega had moved on. Those stories he heard, the actions that Kaeya had taken...were they all just lies? If they were then why did the Omega have them? Or let them even exist?

There were so many unanswered questions...

When he finally went back to bartend a few days later, Kaeya was there a little later than his normal time. Before the Captain even sat down the redhead had already placed his regular, a ‘Death After Noon’, down in front of him. This caught the Omega’s attention immediately and he looked up at the Alpha. Diluc knew the other could tell he was nervous but blessedly Kaeya just smiled and thanked him for it.

Diluc nodded and went to make a few more orders, all while under the watchful eye of the Cavalry Captain. It was a quiet evening between the two of them and before Kaeya could ask for another of his favorite drink, it was already placed in front of him once more. This time the redhead had not had to entertain anyone else right away. Standing there for a moment before he could get the question out, Kaeya sat there quietly waiting. He thanked the Omega for the gift...and asked him to stay a little while after closing. The happy twinkle in the Captain’s eye was worth the effort it took to get that question out.

Once the tavern was closed for the day, Diluc began to clean up. His muscle memory kicked in and if said talk was to go awry he didn’t want to walk into a mess because he was so angry he forgot to clean. He heard movement behind him and as he turned around with a tray full of dirty cups that needed washing; there was the Cavalry Captain, broom in hand sweeping up the floor. Diluc gave him a nod as he returned behind the bar to clean up the dishes.

After everything was done, they sat down at the bar and talked. Kaeya started saying he was sorry he had pushed so hard that it caused the redhead to lose his cool but he was grateful for it. Since Diluc had come back he had never been open about anything...the Omega was thankful to catch a glimpse into the other’s mindset. The Navy haired Captain now knew he had been doing more harm than good. That an Omega showing interest was something wildly sought after by Alphas but he should have known better. Because of course Diluc had to be different from all the other Alphas.

Kaeya made it clear that he had never intended to hurt Diluc that day in the rain all those years ago but if he hadn’t said something he would have chickened out. He wanted a future with Diluc back then and that meant revealing his supposed past. The Omega may have been left there as a spy but he never took it to heart. He found love and a family that didn’t try to manipulate him, he was trying to actively show Diluc he had chosen him over his home country. A country that he barely remembered, a people who were ruthless enough to place all this on a child’s shoulders.

The Omega admitted he never realized how much pain Diluc was in that day because as much as Master Cerpus was a father to him… When your own family drops you off in a different nation, on a stranger's doorstep, you are always waiting for the other shoe to drop. He was waiting to be cast aside again because that is what had happened already. As much as he loved both of the Ragnvindrs; he was trying to keep them at arm's length, failing in many respects, but realizing it was too late when it was really too late. He had lost the best thing that ever happened to him. The next day Diluc had vanished and he had nothing but his Pyro Vision to keep him company. So, he did the only thing he could think of and that was working on purging the Knights of any corruption he could find. So that when Diluc did return it would be to something that was not so poisonous, failing to realize again the betrayal was bone deep and would never go away.

Diluc never knew that. Never once had it ever crossed his mind that Kaeya would expect to be thrown away. Kaeya was there and would always be there as far as he had been concerned. He tried to respond, only getting out a meager ‘It wasn’t your faul-’ but was stopped by a gentle finger to his lips. Looking up to the owner there was a sad smile gracing the Captain’s face. He shushed the Alpha, saying he already knew, from what Diluc said before ‘taking ill’ everything Kaeya had feared happening only happened because of one wrongly-timed truth and knows Diluc feels more responsible than he should.

Moving his hand from his lips and trailing downwards to grab the Alpha’s hand, the Captain gave it a squeeze, receiving one from the Pyro user in return. That simple return seemed to give the Omega the push to continue forward. Kaeya then asked, gently, “Can we try again? We can go slowly but I want to try again.”

Ruby eyes widened slightly, looking at the Captain a little shocked. A whispered reply of ‘You’re sure?’ left the man’s lips, as faint and light as a spring breeze. Still the navy haired Omega heard it and nodded. To try again with him, it was really all Diluc ever wanted but never thought he deserved. He wasn’t the only one that wanted it though. So did Kaeya. Kaeya wanted to try again too. Was it selfish if the other wanted it as well?

Diluc’s heart skipped a beat as something he hadn’t felt in a long time took hold of his soul. Happiness. The redhead had not been happy or even felt happy in so long, he wasn’t sure he could recognize it. A light blush colored the pale cheeks of the redhead. He was a little embarrassed but that was fine. Nodding before a touch before the man verbally responded with a simple reply. The word is as light as a dandelion seed on the surface of the water barely leaving a ripple in the room but housing so much potential.

“Okay.”

There was nothing more brilliant than the smile he received from Kaeya that night. The stars seemed dimmer after that and not even the sun’s radiance could match. The Captain leaned forwards and pressed a kiss to the Alpha’s cheek, causing said Alpha to blush even more. Lips lingered against his face and a whispered ‘thank you’ that was woven together with so much emotion it made both parties begin to tear up.

That brilliant smile.

That night at the Tavern was the beginning of their reconciliation. As much as they wanted to try again, the Alpha wanted to make sure they were both comfortable before going forward. That boundaries were made and both would abide by them. Diluc made it clear that the Captain’s happiness was his main concern. If this didn’t work out he made Kaeya promise to tell him and until the Omega was happy, truly happy, he would still be under the Ragnvindr’s protection.

Kaeya was taken aback a bit before he smiled at the redhead in the most loving manner Diluc had ever seen and agreed to the conditions. They revealed as much as they were comfortable with each time they met. It still took them a little bit but they began to gravitate toward each other more often as their little date nights continued. The two didn’t begin officially dating until a few months later and it had only been two months since then. They kept it secret. No one had to know if this didn’t work out. The past two months together had made the redhead so happy. It had been the most wondrous two months of the Alpha’s life. He felt as if he finally found ground again after drifting for so long.

He could die happy knowing Kaeya loved him.

Diluc dying would probably happen too with the way he was feeling currently. With his consciousness returning to him and the memories of the past now receding, he continued to feel the fiery pain ripping through his cold body. Only when the pain began to become more prevalent did other sensations. He felt something itchy touching his skin as well as a light pressure that kept moving...someone’s hands? There was warmth too that he had collapsed into, chasing after it to keep the chill he was experiencing at bay. A familiar scent that broke through the fog of pain. It was light and floral and smelled like home.

“Kae...ya?” the redhead managed to get out. His words broke with each gasp of air. Diluc knew exactly whom had hold of him. The smell of Calla Lillies was pungent and thick...if the Alpha was to perish it was the last scent he ever hoped to smell.

“Hey, sunshine, I’m here,” replied the Omega. The voice of an angel if there was one. The sound of the other helped ground the pyro user as his body continued to rage against him. It made the Alpha feel that much safer as well. Even now there was no one else he trusted more than his Kae. He was not fond of the Omega stopping his hand motions, it had been helping bring warmth back into his body. That was the only complaint till he remembered...Kaeya wasn’t supposed to be at the Winery...

“H-how?”

“I got worried when you didn’t show up in Mondstadt for a couple days longer than normal,” Kaeya replied, to the question as if he had been expecting it. The Omega probably was after he had gotten a foothold in just how Diluc’s brain had been working these days. A sensation raked across his skin, it was itchy and dry...probably something or part of something that had not been roasted to a crisp that was being used to cover his exposed flesh. Something used to keep the cold at bay.

“So-sorry,” he gasped. Diluc hadn’t meant for this to worry Kaeya, the man had enough on his plate in terms of dealing with the Knights, he didn’t need to needlessly worry about the redhead and his compromised immune system. It did make him wonder though, even though he couldn’t smell his two beta companions, Diluc figured they had to be near. There would have been no other way for the Omega to have gotten to him if they hadn’t.

“Don’t apologize, just...how did this happen?” Kaeya asked, confusion and concern laced through each word. Leave it to the Omega to not fret about what had happened and focus on the present...Unfortunately, the red head didn’t have an answer for him...

“I...I d-don’t-” Diluc tried but coughing overtook the rest of his words. He then felt the sensation on his back once more. Warmth filled the area as his body was wracked with coughs. Breathing hurt so much as his spasming lungs tried their best to keep air flowing. The Alpha felt so pathetic at that moment. There was nothing he could do for anything...weakness was not something the man took too well.

“That’s alright,” the Navy haired Omega said, trying to reassure Diluc that everything would be alright in the end. Diluc had his doubts though...this was one of the worst biological experiences of his life. “Adelinde and Elzer think you may have been drugged.”

“W-wha?” The Alpha questioned. This was home, he was supposed to be the safest here. There hadn’t even been an inkling of a threat since the Stormterror incident. His informants had not failed him before...did something happen that slipped under his radar? Even Kaeya had not said anything to him as a warning...this wasn’t right.

“They said it happened before...” Kaeya continued, it was as if he was trying to keep the redhead focused so his mind couldn’t stray too far.

“Ye...Fa-tui.”

“I know,” the Captain said, knowing exactly where the other’s thought process was going, “There are no Fatui working for you here or are even let near the winery but they are in Mond…Do you think they could have been part of it?”

“May...be…”

Another coughing fit had Diluc tensing and then going limp in the cryo user’s embrace. His body wanting to rest in spite of the pain wracking his system. As much as his mind wanted to try to work these problems out, his body needed rest. He found safety and comfort in the Captain’s hold again. The Alpha was content to just fall back into unconsciousness once more but then the Captain spoke up once more.

“Diluc, we think we have something that may help figure out if it is a drug or if your system has been compromised due to past poisonings,” Kaeya said. What caught the redhead’s attention was the trepidation in the Captain’s voice. Usually it was steady with a hint of teasing but this time it seemed more solemn.

“Hmm?” Diluc asked groggily, the urge to sleep getting the better of him. The Alpha was safe in his beau’s arms and his body knew that as it began to shut down, embracing the darkness willingly.

“I need you to give me a full bite, the scent might help or at least keep you safe in case this gets out,” the Omega said, startling Diluc out of his complacent slumber.

“No,” the red haired Alpha gasped out, trying his best to struggle away. It was too early for something like that. They had only just begun to see each other again, it was far too soon to mark Kaeya. They all had to know this even as they kept hold of him to try to stop his struggling. Diluc was not able to break free from the cryo user. His body was far too weak and currently the Captain too strong. He had not been able to get away and collapsed against the other. Try as he might to get his breathing under control to attempt again,

Diluc knew he was being manhandled to the floor, the cold startling the redhead awake a little more and soon had a lap full of the navy-haired Captain. Slumping against the man in his lap with the slightest push from one of his Beta companions, the Alpha was not liking where this was going. His dislike was solidified even more when his nose came into contact with the Omega’s scent gland. The instincts that Diluc often suppressed began to rise, clearly this was an offering and his brain was demanding he partake. The redhead wasn’t going to allow this as he tried to get away once more and failed due to his beau, who kept Diluc’s head near the gland.

Fighting with his instincts were bad enough but he could feel the other three moving his plaint form around again. He soon felt two hands on either side of his mouth, a slight pain began to permeate from the area. Fear struck him as the Alpha tried to keep jaw tightly closed. They really were going to force this but Diluc could be just as stubborn if not more so. Eventually, the pain out weighted his might and one of the three had been able to wrench open his jaw. The next thing he knew was that he could taste lillies on his tongue. Panicking, he tried to remove his head from Kaeya’s neck only to find it was pinned in place by one set of hands and his own arms had been secured as well. The only thing left to the Alpha was his pathetic flailing, whilst broken whimpers fell from his parted lips and even that was getting him nowhere.

Maybe he could wear himself out, then they would be unable to carry this out?

As his brain was preoccupied, the Alpha was not prepared for the sudden pain in his back, sounding off the offence with a muffled scream. He...he’s just been stabbed and all the hard work he had put into not marking the other was lost. One second of cripping pain was all it took and Diluc had bit down hard on Kaeya’s shoulder. The pain causes adrenaline to shoot through the Alpha as he doubles his attempts to get away. Still the three who had a hold of him did not let him go. It came to pass that he realized that Diluc lost to the will of the other three and only then did he finally give up.

The Alpha stopped struggling and started crying, his tears falling like torrents from his pained and closed eyes. Each staggering breath took in more of the Calla Lily scent of his Kaeya but at what cost? Diluc didn’t feel that everything they had gone through was worth it, not for him with everything he had done. Now, Kaeya didn’t have a choice in the matter, if things didn’t work out between them, Diluc could move on without repercussions but Kaeya would alway be subjected to them. It wasn’t fair to the Omega, it wasn't. The Alpha wasn’t worth it...he just wasn’t worth it.

His grief and weakened state worked against Diluc as his body began to shut down once more from the exertion. That brief surge of adrenaline had left him drained in its wake. The redhead's mind began to get hazy and the last thing the heir felt was the briefest touch on his lips. He wasn’t even sure why it was happening, only that it was. Diluc then knew no more as his mind trapped him once again.

Days passed and the Alpha didn’t remember much. He hadn’t been fully conscious until a week and a half later and that had only been for maybe an hour before he drifted off again. From what he could piece together from all sources, he had missed out on a lot. The timeline he put together proved how dangerous his poisoning was. After all...the amount used on him could have easily killed someone if it felt him in such bad straights. Not everyone had even a basic immunity.

When he first started feeling bad it was about a day before the rut symptoms kicked in. When the signs got worse he headed to the basement. He spent two days in the cellar before Kaeya got there on the third day. On the fourth day they took him to his room and on the fifth day called for help from the Deaconess and the Chief Alchemist and on the 6th day into the sickness was when they all showed up, including Jean.

That was a week. Then he had not woken up until almost five days later when he was up for almost an hour before falling back to sleep. Kaeya had been unconsolable and try as he might to help, Diluc couldn’t do much. He couldn’t even hold the Omega to try to tell him he was alright. No, he was too weak and it was too hard for him to manage that menial little task. It had left the Alpha so frustrated with himself that sleep was a blessing.

A day later was when the Deaconess came back after receiving the letter that he had woken up for longer than a few moments. Having her come out the day previous would have been a waste of time because the Alpha was soundly asleep again and the likelihood of him waking once more was slim. Following that visit, the redhead began waking for longer periods of time the next couple days and then 3 days after the second visit from Barbara he had managed to stay awake for 8 hours. From then on he was gaining a couple hours each day until he was back on a regular schedule.

Altogether 18 days from the initial drugging to when he was well enough to have Kaeya explain what had happened. Diluc would have never guessed that it was Donna of all people. She was annoying as hell but ultimately harmless. Or so he thought. The Alpha would have never imagined Donna would have borrowed someone else's sharpened teeth to inflict the damage her own bite could not. Just how long did it take for her to break? For the Fatui to get into her mind? They had promised the Alpha as her mate in return for funds? The Fatui didn’t need his money but they could use his power and influence. How though? What did they have in store for him that he was not aware of?

Given those questions some leverage, how did the Fatui manage to slip past not only Diluc’s information network but Kaeya’s as well? The Omega had a good sized web of his own overlapping with Diluc’s own network a little bit. This had gone under both of their radars. It was mind boggling how one misstep in information had him poisoned and missing a good part of the month. Still, the updated information he had was forwarded to The Underground and The Squadron of Seven had been monitoring Mondstadt since his poisoning became public, trying to get a handle on why no one had inkling to this plan.

It was now 21 days after the poisoning and Kaeya was helping him around the room. Diluc was back on a normal sleeping schedule, much to the delight of everyone in the Manor. Physically, he was in much better shape than he was a few days ago as well. His color had come back and he was gaining the weight he lost while he was deep in illness. He could eat and drink on his own again, his Omega was still there just in case. His muscles still needed more time to recover. Where he had no issues walking short distances around his room, if he tried to walk down the hall or to another room he had difficulties. More often than not he was left leaning against the wall before sliding to the ground. Other than that, the Alpha was recovering nicely.

The redhead had been slowly going through the paperwork that had piled up due to his illness. Try as Adelinde and Elzer might, there were somethings only Diluc could work on because he was the only one with the knowledge of it. They took care of everything else they could. Right now though, Kaeya was helping him back down the hall to his room and bed because as much as Diluc had stuff to do he was still recovering. His Omega was making sure he took regular breaks so he would not undo all the work they had done for his recovery. As stubborn as the Alpha was because Kaeya had lost 18 of his own days of work he did not fight when he was told it was break time.

That much was undeniably true. Kaeya had been with him since the Omega arrived there after the missed date. Were it not for Amber running out Kaeya’s paperwork every morning and Noelle being in charge of picking it up every evening, the Captain would have been severely behind. Right now no one really knew that they were mates. His cover was that he was looking into the hiring process and how a ‘Mating Expert’ would have been able to bring the substance into the Winery Manor in the first place. It made sense and many didn’t bat an eyelash at the excuse either. Neither was ready for everyone to know they were mates.

The upper tiers of the Knights of Favonius were the only ones who knew about Kaeya and Diluc being mated. Jean had returned with everyone who needed to know to the Winery a few days after Diluc had woken up for that first hour. When Kaeya could be pried from the room without guilt, the younger male told the redhead everything about the meeting. At first some were a little surprised, especially with how Diluc had acted when he first returned. Finding out there was an entire misunderstanding and how the Alpha thought the Omega had chosen another...that cleared up a lot. They were told by Kaeya, that the redhead never thought the Omega had waited for him and the Captain's actions, mannerisms and words just seemed to reinforce that belief. He was trying to make sure that Kaeya was happy and didn’t want to drag him away from his supposed newer mate. That was why Diluc was acting so cold to the Captain.

When Jean heard this explanation she couldn’t help but sigh. It made too much sense and explained nearly all of the redhead’s behavior. She also scolded Kaeya for not being forthcoming about their relationship before this happened. It would have saved them from her gathering her men to try to take away his mate. Sheepishly, he did explain they had only been dating again for the past two months because Diluc wanted to make sure Kaeya was going to be happy with him and it wasn’t just wishful thinking on both their parts...after all they had changed from 4 years ago. A point Jean said wasn’t true, they were both still idiots in love. Kaeya averted his eye with a blush gracing his cheeks. The blonde Alpha just shook her head and excused herself, ordering the Omega back to his mate to make sure he didn’t die on them all. She did have a slight teasing tone with the delivery of the Order. That is what Kaeya had told him anyway as he helped Diluc with dinner that night.

Other than that visit it has only been Amber and Noelle who have made the trek out to the Winery. Many people are being told to stay away for the time being. There was a note delivered by Barbara one time for the mated couple. It was from Rosaria who in cryptic fashion told the Omega to make sure the Alpha got better as she was taking care of the City in his stead so he didn’t have to worry about it. Anti-Heroes had to stick together it seemed. If there was anyone that the Captain did trust it was the renegade sister from the Church. Diluc on the other hand just groaned about it all. It wasn’t that he didn’t trust Rosaria, she was dedicated to Mondstadt’s safety but he felt a little uneasy about how she could see through the lies so easily. That was something for another time though.

Presently the Alpha was being settled down on the bed for his break. Just in case he was hit with a bout of lightheadedness he would already be in a safe place. The redhead scooted over to allow his mate to join him. Which of course Kaeya did. After so long without being with the Alpha, the security of his mates arms was more than welcome. Least that was what Diluc had been told.

Diluc ran an unconscious hand up and down his mate’s back. His fingers crooked, dragging his knuckles across the plains of Kaeya’s tone back. It was grounding for the Alpha, it made him feel as if his past mistakes were really forgiven and they weren’t just pretty words falling from equally pretty lips. Every misstep that he had taken was subdued in his mind when he had Kaeya in his arms. Maybe it was the light purring and the pheromones. Maybe it was the weight nestled against him. Who knows but it was the best medicine he could have asked for. It calmed his frazzled mind and allowed him to, for once, have a thoughtless headspace.

The Alpha’s silence was not anything new but it must have still been a little bit unusual for Kaeya. The redhead felt his mate shifting against him. Peaking his ruby eyes open the man connected with a single pale sapphire. The sole orb didn’t have any sorrow weaved within it’s questioning glace but it held a curiosity. Something Diluc met with a raise of one of his eyebrows. Silent permission to speak his mind, even though the Captain never needed such a thing before.

“What’s wrong?” The navy haired Captain asked. There was a hint of concern but like his eye, there was more curiosity than anything else.

“Nothing, Kae,” replied Diluc.

“What’s wrong?” the Omega emphasized again, he was not going to let this drop.

Was there something wrong? The Alpha didn’t know how to respond. His demons had been quiet this day and not like the days before. Opening up about things when he finally felt like his mind was resting did not seem like a good idea but looking at his mate and how determined their Kaeya was, Diluc would have to deal with everything a lot sooner than he would have cared too. His mate had once already dragged him from the depth of his self loathing just a few days ago. Kae should know it takes longer than a few days to recover from years of self-detestation. It may never go away…that didn’t mean he had to keep it all to himself though.

“I still can’t believe you’re really here, I suppose...it feels like I am dreaming,” whispered Diluc as he reached up and caressed his mate’s tanned cheek, while his other hand stilled against the Omega’s back “As if I am teetering on the edge of a cliff, held up only by the wind. Waiting for said wind to cease and causing me to crash to the ground in the flames of my own making.”

“You still have doubts?” asked the Navy haired Omega, a little bit of hurt entwined with this voice.

“I still don’t believe I’m worth it…” replied the Alpha in that same whispered tone, “I don’t doubt you, Kae. You wouldn’t have done any of this if you didn’t love me. I know this, as you said before ‘I can't make you do anything’. So I cannot bring myself to doubt you…”

The tension that was in the Omega’s body began to loosen and he relaxed against the other a little bit more. Kaeya was quiet once more leaning into the calloused hand of his Alpha. His purring became a touch louder and was met with a soft growl from Diluc. After a moment of that the Captain spoke up again. This time with a more complicated purpose.

“You know what, I think with your progress we can sit down and really talk about this now, Luc,” the Navy haired Omega stated as he moved himself to hover above his mate that was still laying down.

“I’m laying down, doesn’t that count for something?” replied Diluc, recoiling a little at the slight pinch he received in return for that statement.

“Sassy sunshine,” teased Kaeya as he leaned down to peck at his mates lips. He lingered there for a moment before he whispered against the slightly chapped lips, “Let me in...tell me what kept you away for so long that you doubted me at first sight? Tell me what monsters are lurking in your mind that told you you had to stop seeing your own self worth? Tell me why you stopped loving me the way we were back then?”

“I never stopped loving you, Kae,” the Alpha admitted softly, lips still against the other, “Never stopped craving you…”

“Then why?” Kaeya asked, a little confusion infusing its way into his question as he backed away a touch, disconnecting their pressureless kiss. The Navy haired one tilted their head to the side as well, displaying their continued puzzlement.

“You already know the story…I don’t think telling you again will help with anything.”

“Sometimes you remember more of what happened when you retell it,” the Omega stated gently, “Come on, tell me everything. Hold nothing back.”

“Don’t hold back?” Asked the redhead, his voice taking on a tone of surprise and dread. As if someone had just handed him a bomb and told him to deal with it. He wasn’t ready to deal with it but it seemed his mate wouldn’t really let his demons be. The Omega would continue to poke at them with a pointy stick until he got what he wanted.

“Don’t hold back,” Kaeya reinforced with encouragement.

“Kaeya...when I returned,” Diluc began after taking a deep breath, “I was under no delusion you wouldn’t have changed. I had changed, so why not you? Yet, when I returned...I found no hint of who you were before. I was looking at a stranger that had a resemblance to you. There was no familiarity I could see, nothing I could have grasped onto. To me...you had moved on. It was obvious with how you flirted with everyone. The rumors of who you had and hadn't been with, cutting into me...I felt gutted as you just floated along with it like you belonged there…”

Diluc paused as he gathered his thoughts he had given Kaeya a watered down version of his reactions before but now it seemed that damn has broken. It was as if his mate knew exactly what needed to be said to have the Alpha saying everything he was going to hold back for the other’s sake. Now, Kaeya knew that it wasn’t just his own words and actions but the drunken ramblings of the Tavern’s patrons that Diluc no doubt had to listen to every night he worked. Just how much that affected the redhead’s perception of him was no doubt staggering. There was more to it though.

“You were never fully mine and with how I left,” continued the Alpha as he turned his eyes away from his mate, ashamed at his thoughts and how they kept him away from Kaeya for so long, “I didn’t think you’d wait for me. I felt it would have been better for you to have chosen another. I was so sure you had after seeing you again. I was just hoping to see the one thread of my past still there and that had been frayed, being taken by the wind. It felt as if you had cut all our ties...and I was going to respect your decision and keep my distance. That was the plan originally. That is why I couldn’t understand why you zeroed in on me when I came back. I should have been nothing to you...I felt like nothing to you.”

“Love, sunshine, no that-that’s no-” the Omega choked on his words and couldn’t finish his sentence, let alone make one. Obviously, his glimpse into Diluc’s mind that one night at the demolished hilichurl camp barely grazed the surface of what the redhead felt. There is so much more damage a few pretty words would never fix. It was something the Alpha's going to be working on with his mate.

“I was fine with it though...being nothing,” the redhead charged on, the order to hold nothing back breaking that damn that Diluc had built up and he couldn’t stop, “Ever since I left it had felt like that. I should have stayed but my anger wouldn’t let me...I was so sure I would have hurt you again. I would have ended myself if I had. My time away changed me, I found myself a colder person because of it. I was no longer the happy light filled child I used to be. I became sharp and jagged, if anyone came too close they would be struck down. So being nothing to you was fine...I couldn’t hurt you again if I was nothing. Yet, you kept coming back no matter how much I pushed you away. Then the teasing turned more sexual and I just couldn’t deal with that. I didn’t want to be just another notch in your bedpost. We had a past that I cherished so much and I wanted to keep it untarnished, a one nightstand would have ruined it all. All I could do was keep pushing you back. i-”

Diluc cut himself off with tears beginning to gather at the cornes. His breathing was becoming labored again as he tried not to cry. It hurt to think of how distant the two of them had become. That the two people who used to be inseparable now had a giant ravine in between them. They had been working on mending it but with the whole poisoning situation and the forced full bite between them. It made it difficult for Diluc, who in his heart still believed Kaeya could do better than him and couldn’t see what it was that the Omega saw in him. This baggage, all of it, would have had to come to the surface for them to survive.

“I just never understood why you kept coming back after every time...why? Why try to place me in your world? You’ve made your own life without me in it. You’ve done well enough for yourself, you don’t need me. I had contemplated just hiring another person for the bar just so I wouldn’t have to step foot in the city anymore. Color me surprised when I got word that you came out to the Winery multiple times when I was out of the country on business. I had to realize if I had followed through with hiring another, then I would have had no sanctuary. I still have trouble figuring out why…” Diluc started as he brought his hand up to caress his mate’s cheek once again as he turned his tear dappled eyes toward the one person he still loved above everything else. The redhead still believed he didn’t deserve Kaeya but still loved him. He gasped lightly as a kiss was laid to his palm as Kaeya held onto his hand and wrist almost as if it was a tether to reality. “Why come back to me? After everything I had done...why?”

“I never meant to make you feel like that, Luc,” Kaeya whispered into the palm he had kissed and held to his cheek, nuzzling it slightly. The Omega had responded to the other in less than a heartbeat of time. His voice was wet with sadness as he started. “I was just trying to get your attention. To look at me again. The teasing, the flirting...it was all I knew how to do to get people's attention.”

“You don’t have to expl-” began Diluc but was cut off.

“You did as I asked love, let me have my peace and try to place some of your misconceptions to rest,” the Navy haired Captain said as he shushed his mate only continuing when he nodded, “When you left me...left all of us, the others had something to lean on. The business still needed to be run, the bar tended to, affairs finalized, but I had nothing. My light vanished and I had to rebuild from the ground up. I was determined to never let anyone that close again, it hurt too much to lose you and I had to be ready for you to never come back. Were it not for your vision I would have thought you were dead many times over. You have no idea the heart attack I had every time it flickered. So many times I wondered if you were okay. Were you eating? Sleeping? Did you fall into a coma? Did you have amnesia and did not remember who you were? That little bobble only told me you were breathing, not what state you were in. Those thoughts also went into the building of my walls because I didn’t know what state you would be in if you returned. I had to be ready for anything.”

As the Captain began to explain his side of things, Diluc found his self loathing thoughts kick in again. He never thought he'd have put Kaeya through that. The redhead knew that the Omega could smell the distress coming off of him in waves. Kaeya began to purr to attempt to comfort his Alpha. There was a pause in the explanation until he calmed down enough for his mate to continue.

“When you did come back,” Kaeya began again, this time pain and regret entering his voice, “You looked shattered. There were deep crevasses between the shards. I couldn’t get a good look at you the first time I caught you in Mondstadt because of that cloak you were wearing, your smell wasn’t even that pronounced either but later... You looked lifeless. Whatever you had encountered out there had drained you dry. All of my wall building, my masking, my facade, none of it prepared me for how desolate you had become. Your eyes were empty, face of stone and voice could cut down people with a syllable. I didn’t know how to approach you and I couldn’t bring my old self forward. I haven’t needed to for years and...I don’t know how to turn it off, to take off the mask. I didn’t know how badly I was hurting you or how you were perceiving things.”

Kaeya then paused for a moment, Diluc didn’t know why his mate stalled his explanation but that was when he ended up with a lapful of Cavalry Captain. Looking up into the determined sparkling eye stilled the Alpha. Diluc’s vision was blurry due to the unshed tears but he was able to see his Omega was far from done. The redhead knew Kaeya could tell he was still not okay, his distress from earlier had not completely dissipated it was just mellowed and the continued light purr that came from Navy haired Omega was keeping him calm as he carried on with his side of the story.

“I never knew you would rather me hate you,” he began again, Diluc could feel the nimble fingers lightly brushing the drops of tears that were building up at the corners of his eyes away with feather light touches, “than tease you. Never thought you would take it as a mockery of our past. I was only trying to get you to look at me, pay attention to me because for 4 long painful years I was without it. I craved your attention like an addict. I wanted to be the only thing on your mind at whatever the cost. It was only that slip up at the outpost that gave me a glimpse into your mind and I couldn’t believe I had missed all the signs you showed me.”

Diluc watched as his mate laid down on his chest, the Captain’s ear right over his heart. It was as if he was using the Alpha’s vitals as a way to stabilize his resolve, there was more that was going to be discussed. With the way both he and Kaeya were, it made sense that both of them needed some form of constant reassurance. The two of them had been nearly open books to each other and now they were nearly strangers. That distance between them felt so wrong, it was like they were trying to find a candle in the dark. Just something to light the way back home yet both were scared of what they may find...only with Kaeya’s persistence have they even made it this far.

Wrapping his arms around the Omega, he felt the other relax against him once again. It felt good knowing that his mate still trusted him even after everything he had done. They were silent for a time before Kaeya had it in him to try speaking again.

“After that incident, I knew I had to change my approach if I was going to get even the smallest foothold. I couldn’t change everything, dropping my mask completely. I didn’t want you to think that everything up to that point was fake and I was leading you on. I had to work on actively lessening the mask around you. I wanted you to see that I was hiding my pain in a different way and it worked. You allowed me in and I could see so much damage you had sustained and I hated everything that caused you harm…” Kaeya trailed off for a moment, and Diluc watched as the Captain lifted a hand and using a finger began to trace a scar on his arm, before the Navy haired male continued in a hushed tone “I hated myself there for a while too… I was that last nail in the coffin of your grief. I never said any of that to hurt you…”

“I know,” Diluc replied, tightening his grip momentarily. Centering not only himself but his mate as well.

“I said it because I promised myself,” his Omega continued, “To have a future together there would be no secrets. I had too. Never in a million years could I have phathomed what would happen on that day but if I backed down, I didn’t think I could muster up the will to try again later. It has been one of my greatest regrets. I drove you from your home by inadvertently cutting one of your last ties keeping you grounded. I severed it. I left you in a state of freefall with nothing to cushion the impact.”

“You never-” the Alpha’s throat swelled up, choking off his rebuttal. Kaeya never made him leave. No, Diluc left because he needed justice for his father and he didn't want to hurt the Omega anymore than he already had. He broke his promise to be there and keep the other safe. He was a failure. He needed to redeem himself. Not once had he blamed Kaeya because when he could think straight he knew if Kaeya had really been acting against Mondstadt the Omega would have never said a thing. It ached to think Kaeya held himself so responsible for his departure.

“I was going to fix it though,” Kaeya stated in a whispered tone full of conviction, “I wanted to be the one that brings back your light filled smile. I wanted to be the reason for your returned warmth. I will make amends for what I had unknowingly extinguished. That was my plan at first but then my lust for you reared its head when I got you to start opening up. When I asked to go steady with you once more, I was prepared for a no…but my heart fluttered when you gave me your shy ‘yes’.”

Kaeya sat up, placing his weight on Diluc’s thighs as he grabbed his Alpha by the collar of his shirt and pulled him up. The strength the Omega had was incredible and it made the redhead yearn for his mate even more. Diluc’s hands made their way up his mate’s thighs and lingered there, fingers dragging little circles across the covered flesh. The little shivers the action enticed out of the Captain was intoxicating as was the look of that pale sapphire eye darkening with temptation.

“I don’t think you’ll ever realize what that did to me,” he spoke with a low grumbly purr as claimed Diluc’s lips in another kiss. One the Alpha returns with vigor. Whatever happened in this conversation had broken down Diluc’s walls of hesitation. Would he ever be over his self-loathing? Maybe in time but for now, knowing that Kaeya was not pitying him and truly wanted this relationship was finally sinking in. He knew there would be a rough road ahead for both of them. They both had demons that lurked at the corner of their minds, waiting to devour them whole but with each other they may outlive those thoughts in the dark shadowy parts of their minds.

“Kae…” whispered the redhead when they parted.

“No more regrets,” the Omega demanded, “No more regrets, no more questioning, no more time lost, I refuse to lose you to your mind. I want you. I want this. Everything else be damned. I refuse to let go again.”

“You won’t have to,” Diluc promised as he reached up to pull the Navy haired Captain down into another kiss with one hand, entwining into the silk blue strands. The other stayed on the Omega’s thigh, gripping the muscle there with enough strength that there would surely be a bruise there later. That caused Kaeya to groan approvingly as he slipped his tongue past his Alpha’s lips enticing the other to play.

It could have been seconds or minutes later, neither was really sure. Time seemed to halt as they savored each other. The past four years of deprivation and need engulfing the two of them. Neither cared either...not until they were caught. A single cough was the only thing that brought their tongue tango to a halt. Their heads whipped to the door where an amused looking blonde head maid was standing with an approving smile on her face. The mated pair stared the beta down for a moment before she broke the silence with her sweet voice.

“As much as I would adore you both fulfilling the promise made to me for grandchildren,” she began, both males darkening as red flushed their cheeks, “I would prefer that it was done when Master Diluc no longer had dizzy spells. I can’t imagine that would be a good experience for either of you. Anyway, dinner will be ready in a few moments, I’ll be sure to bring it up as soon as it is.”

With that Adelinde gracefully exited the room, closing the door behind her. In her wake she left a very embarrassed couple. Diluc fell back to the bed groaning as his Omega was still perched on his lap and just as exasperated as his mate. Getting caught by Adelinde was the same feeling as one would have getting caught by one’s mother. She raised them after all. It was embarrassing in a way that was hard to describe. A moment of silence encased the room before Diluc locked eyes with his mate once more.

“Fuck it,” was all Diluc could say before he dragged Kaeya back into another kiss while pale hands made their way up the loose shirt the Omega was wearing. His mate was giggling at the action because they weren’t going to do anything too serious until the Alpha had a clean bill of health. It didn't mean the redhead was going to go without kisses and if Adelinde insisted on barging in on them he’d give her an eyeful.

Kaeya couldn’t agree more it seemed, as he began to unbutton the Alpha’s shirt granting him access to the muscled chest he was leaning against.

Yeah...they were going to make this work.

fin