Chapter Text
Haku has no idea what is going on and observes Master carefully.
He's not in any danger of course, not in a spar, not even against Kisame-san and Samehada. However, the entire situation is very strange.
All the swordsmen spar against each other of course, for who else could stand against them? But Kisame-san is usually one for restraint. He fights when he has to, against an enemy, when he's challenged, or when it is time to practise. For him to be the one issuing a challenge is extremely unusual.
And it's been happening repeatedly over the last month, with increasing regularity.
Everyone is baffled.
No one understands, and even Kisame-san looks bored by the whole thing.
Is he seeking more of a challenge? A greater opponent to hone his skills against? Certainly Master and Kubikiribōchō are the best of the other swordsmen, but Samehada has long been considered the most ferocious of the swords for a reason. Even single combat like this is an uneven contest. So why does Kisame-san not ask for multiple opponents? Surely that would make more sense!
But no, it's always just sensei.
"Look, you're not even trying right now!" Master levels Kubikiribōchō at his opponent. "What the fuck is wrong with you! This is just wasting my time! Be serious or stop!"
Master is right, even Haku can see it.
Kisame-san's footwork is sloppy and his swings are half-hearted at best. This kind of fighting is disgraceful, and it should be an insult to Samehada. But the tongue of the sword flicks out, tasting the air and reaching for Kubikiribōchō.
It seems... happy?
Kisame lifts Samehada, pressing it against Kubikiribōchō again, and Samehada almost seems to nuzzle the other sword.
"You're right, I'm sorry." Kisame-san looks abashed, a strange thing on a man so large and imposing. "It's just that Samehada wanted to spend some time with Kubikiribōchō, you know? And sparring was the easiest way to do that. They don't want to hurt each other! I couldn't actually fight."
Haku absorbs that slowly, and Master looks equally bewildered.
"They... don't want to hurt each other?" Master speaks slowly, forming the words as if they're in a foreign language. "Have you been eating something strange? Drinking a weird tea? Are you feverish? They're swords! They don't have opinions!"
Kisame-san looks shocked, and then devastated. "You... you don't talk to Kubikiribōchō. Oh, how awful it must feel, how lonely."
"Talk to it! Of course I don't talk to it! It's a sword!" Master sounds defensive now, and his expression is becoming frustrated. "They're not all like Samehada! We don't all fuse with our weapons you know!"
Kisame-san lowers Samehada and the swords separate, breaking the strange tableau.
"Zabuza," he looks very serious. "Kubikiribōchō is a sword, but it's also more. You bonded with it, you should know that. Samehada speaks to me when we're fused yes, but also when we're not. See?"
Kisame-san runs a hand over Samehada and the scales on the blade seem to relax, going flat against its body.
"At the very least, Kubikiribōchō should be able to answer yes or no questions. You might lose some blood when it says no," Kisame-san grins, showing off sharp teeth, "but it's very much worth it."
Master stabs Kubikiribōchō deep into the ground with a grunt, kneeling next to it. "I feel like an idiot."
"I promise that this isn't a joke. People have asked how I tamed Samehada, why it never turns on me when all of its other wielders have complained that it is fickle and hard to control." Kisame-san pets Samehada again and it seems to squirm against his hand. "This is why. Because Samehada is not tame, not a sword or a pet. It's my friend, with its own thoughts, opinions, and desires. We work together."
Kisame-san looks amused suddenly. "It's like being married. You have to compromise to get what you want. And Samehada wants to be with Kubikiribōchō. So we compromised."
Master rolls his eyes. "You two are so strange."
Kisame-san shrugs. "Maybe. We're swordsmen. We're all strange."
"I'm the normal one," Master insists before turning to Kubikiribōchō.
"Hey, Kubikiribōchō." He clears his throat awkwardly. "I hear you want to spend time with Samehada?"
Master places his hand against the blade and seems relieved when it doesn't cut him. "Really? So if I tried to take you away?"
A small cut appears on his palm, and Master lifts his hand away before licking the blood off. "Well, that seems definite enough. I didn't think it would actually work."
Kisame-san lets out a soft chuckle. "Told you. So, should we leave them to it?"
Master gets up off the ground, dusting dirt off his pants. "Sure, why not."
Kisame-san rests Samehada next to Kubikiribōchō, and Samehada licks the other sword. Interestingly, Kubikiribōchō doesn't cut it.
Haku eyes them as they touch. "Master, would you like me to stay? Watch over them while you attend to other duties?"
Master waves him off. "As if I'm gonna leave Kubikiribōchō here with Samehada! I'm gonna stay and supervise. You get to go and find us food. I'm hungry."
Haku bows his acquiescence. "As you say, Master. Would you like anything Kisame-san?"
A pouch of coins is tossed at his head and Haku snatches it out of the air. "Sure, Haku. Shellfish if you can get it, any other meat if you can't. No shark of any kind. Samehada likes chicken and vegetables, but it won't want them to touch each other. It says they taste wrong when they get mixed up."
After everything that he's heard today, that still manages to surprise Haku and he feels his eyebrows climb.
No matter, he has his orders and he turns away to follow them.
Behind him, he can hear Master and Kisame-san talking.
"So... nice weather we’re having?"
"That’s all you can come up with? The weather?" Master sounds very annoyed. "Let's talk about how Samehada has food preferences! What the fuck!"
Haku gets away as fast as he can.
He'd rather not be around for that conversation, if he can help it.