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Twyla knows Alexis. She has been her friend for five years, her best friend for three, and her girlfriend for just over one (their one year anniversary was about two months ago, and what began as a well-intentioned dinner at the Cafe arraigned by Jocelyn had turned into a town-wide rager when a couple of Sands cousins challenged Alexis to a keg stand. Twyla was still impressed that Alexis had even indulged Kenney and Rocky, and even more impressed that she was able to rope David and Patrick into doing shots with her. She learned to never assume anything about Alexis except that she would need a lazy day in bed after a long night of partying Schitt’s Creek style.) She has been her roommate for about six months, after Alexis had moved out of the Rosebud when business began to pick up. David and Patrick had offered the guest room in their cottage, but Twyla had insisted that Alexis could live with her (she would never tell Alexis that David had confided to her one day in the store that he would pluck out his eyebrows if he had to live with Alexis’ mess again. Twyla thought that her disorganization filled what used to be a pretty empty house. It really felt like people were living in the home now.)
Twyla knows Alexis. She knows her running schedule; when she leaves Twyla’s house in the morning, what route she takes at what time of year, and when she’ll arrive at the Cafe for her morning smoothie before getting to her own work. She knows exactly how many blueberries it took to cover the taste of the greens in her Harvest Smoothies (she does not tell Alexis that she packs so many greens in the smoothies because she’s concerned about how she tends to skip lunch if Twyla can’t insist that she eats something) and she knows that Alexis can’t stand the taste of coconut (something about being held hostage on a yacht that had, eventually, only fed her coconut after not getting a response from Mr. and Mrs. Rose about her ransom. Alexis refused to give her any more detail beyond that, but after seeing her gag on a slice of Gwen’s coconut cream pie, Twyla had cleared her kitchen and her bathroom of any coconut-related products.)
Twyla knows Alexis. She knows about all of the cities that she’s lived in, all of the places that she’s traveled to. From the coast of Italy to the jungles of India and Peru, Alexis had regaled every one of her adventures from her past life to Twyla over the years (she does not tell Alexis that many of those stories scare her to her core, especially the ones that she is offered very limited information. She spends a lot of time thinking about what Alexis hasn’t told her about Beirut or Panama City or Luxembourg. She spends a lot of time not wanting to know.) She knows that Alexis prefers a warmer climate and that she hates the bitter cold that Canadian winters can bring (Twyla had heard the stories about Russian mobsters that destroyed her passport and left her stranded in Moscow. Sometimes she thinks that she knows more about Alexis’ travels than even David.)
Twyla knows Alexis. She knows that the soft spot behind her left ear drives her crazy if it’s given the right amount of pressure. She knows that Alexis likes to mark her up; the hickeys that were scattered across Twyla’s collarbones after a night of too much drinking and not enough common sense left her in sweaters for a week. She knows that Alexis prefers to receive instead of give, and Twyla doesn’t mind. She loves to give; she would give anything to Alexis, everything to Alexis. She knows that Alexis likes to be held and pampered after; face to face cuddling, so they can talk and kiss until she falls asleep. She knows that Alexis refuses to be the little spoon, she likes to wrap herself around Twyla like a blanket and hold her close to her chest (Twyla knows that two people are to blame for this. Stavros, because he was never the big spoon for the right reasons, and Ted, because he was the big spoon for all of the right reasons. Twyla doesn’t mind, she also likes being taken care of.)
Twyla knows Alexis. She knows that she can’t fall asleep before checking every lock on every door and window in the house. She knows that Alexis needs her space and a melatonin gummy if she wakes up screaming in the middle of the night (Twyla had once accidentally given her an edible from a bottle that Stevie had gifted her after Cabaret. It was a very long night and it took Twyla several weeks to forgive herself for it, even though Alexis had forgiven her the next morning and told the story between bouts of laughter to her brother during the unofficial Rose Family Sunday Dinner.) She knows that Alexis needs to sit at the barstool closest to the entrance otherwise she’d get panicky and start tugging at her hair (it had been about three weeks since she’d last pulled at her hair. Twyla kept track in her head.) She knows that Alexis has a small ratty stuffed dog that she would hold to her chest if she had a flashback at their home (His name is Barkistra, and he was usually the only thing that greeted her back at the Rose family mansion when she’d stagger back to her room.)
Twyla knows Alexis. She helps lock the doors and windows, she purchased gauzy curtains for her bedroom to replace the blackout curtains, and she keeps her Sands family quilt collection around the house instead of in the back of her closet. She adds extra greens to Alexis’ smoothies, even sneaking in chia seeds after some research, and she places her extra napkin holder on Alexis’ barstool until she arrives. The melatonin bottle stays on Twyla’s nightstand and Barkistra stays on Alexis’. She keeps track of the time every morning, and gives Alexis a call if 8:30 gets closer to 9:00 and she hasn’t appeared at the bar, out of breath from her run.
Twyla knows Alexis.