Work Text:
“Is it safe, do you think?” Hypnos asks, worried. Makes his brows knit tight, makes him chew his lip. It’s not a face he shows much.
He’s handed Charon a necklace, pretty gold links that gleam with a lot more than only gold, a pearl that sheens a lot more than only pink. Charon lets it hang off his fingers.
“If it’s not, what should I do? What can I do? If I keep it, maybe I can just say I forgot to give it to him. That’s okay, isn’t it? Do you think she’ll mind?” He stops, twists his fingers together, chews his lip. “What am I saying, of course she’ll mind.”
<’d be more worried about Eros,> Charon says, because Aphrodite ain’t got a bit of gold to her, but her son sure does.
Hypnos groans, flops back in the air.
It’s a pretty necklace, one of a kind, and Charon would keep it if it weren’t bound somewhere else, claim it for himself and spare Hypnos all Eros’ temper. Confiscate it, except.
<It’s all right,> Charon says, watching the gold shine certainty, each link holding fast to the other with the viciousness only a lovestruck heart can manage. Watching sea dark light gleam hope, gleam tender, beating a foreign sea’s heart. <Don’t need to do all that.>
He holds it back out, drops it careful in Hypnos’ outstretched hands.
“Really?” Hypnos asks.
<Really,> Charon says.
***
Charon doesn’t agree with Nyx on much, on near anything if he’s being real honest, but even he’s got to admit that the twins are her best work, the culmination of all that experimenting she did with the rest of them. It’s not agreeing though, and he’ll insist that till the day she gets the brass to admit she failed with him. Nyx thinks it’s just one that came out right.
It’s both, though, when they’re together.
Nyx doesn’t like admitting failure though, just as much as she doesn’t prize the best parts of the things she makes.
She’s not very good at appraising things. Not like Charon. Not very good at altering stuff to increase its value, either. Also not like Charon. There’s not anything alike about him and her at all.
For instance:
Charon’s never thought ignoring a person would make ‘em change their shape right.
***
There was this conversation, while back, with Thanatos.
Charon... Charon’s complicated on Thanatos. He’s a good kid, wants to be a good kid. Wants it with his whole soul, because the thing about death is it's a celebration of life, it's a moment people come together, and there’s nothing worse than a death with no one to bear witness.
Death’s not meant to be fixed, it’s meant to be a change, but that ain’t ever what Thanatos learned, because Nyx—well. There’s this conversation they had, him and Thanatos, a while back.
“I just think,” Thanatos started, flush high on his cheeks, drawn up—he does that, draws up in the air, makes up for how he can’t fluff that wing up a threat like he used to, “I just think that he shouldn’t—”
<She stopped talking to him,> Charon said. <Ignored him till he started doing the paperwork how she wanted.>
They’d been going at it. They were always going at it, the rare times Thanatos was covering for Hermes. Charon didn’t see Thanatos much, not ever since Nyx got Hermes all neat and tidy in between them, which meant he couldn’t just slide it up now and then, which meant it was always tense, but it’s not like Charon could just not.
He’s complicated on Thanatos. Kid wants so much and thinks it makes him broken.
“...what?” Thanatos asked, dropping down.
Charon shouldn’t’ve told him. He’d told Hypnos he wouldn’t, once he found out—from Hermes, who got it from Zagreus, because Hypnos just didn’t tell Charon himself, all those little meetings and not one word and how’s Charon supposed to help them if they’re both this—
Hypnos just doesn’t want to be trouble. Or something. Just used to not being what Nyx wants, being the price she paid to get the kid she did want perfect.
<Nyx,> Charon clarified. <Didn’t talk to him for ages, something about making him understand how to do the job right. You think that was best, too? What else you think?>
Thanatos brows knitted together, lips pressed white. He used to chew the bottom. He used to—
It was mean. Charon shouldn’t’ve, but—he’s complicated on Thanatos.
He was just so angry. Never wanted to shake anyone the way he wanted to shake Thanatos for not being able to see—
He knows it’s what Nyx wants, Thanatos not seeing that sort of thing. She did a lot to get him right, just the way she always wanted a kid.
Thanatos used to have this wing, beautiful. He’d bring Charon his old feathers, Charon’d make him quills, and Thanatos'd take them off to Hypnos.
He used to be—
“You’re lying,” Thanatos said, voice shakey. “Mother wouldn’t... She wouldn’t do that to him. You’re—”
<Ask him yourself then,> Charon said, turning away. <Lot happens when you ain’t here.>
Was mean. Should’ve kept it to himself, for Hypnos’ sake. He’d said he wouldn’t tell Thanatos, only thing Hypnos asked of him.
Charon’s not perfect though. Never has claimed he is.
***
He didn’t see Thanatos a while after that; can’t say he was much surprised.
<Zagreus was running his mouth,> Charon said when Hypnos asked. Not a lie. Not really.
Still felt bad about it.
He didn’t see Thanatos a while after that. He tried not to think about it. About how even seeing him at all was lucky, how maybe if he didn’t see Thanatos at all then they’d lose him proper, about how—
“How are our sisters?” Thanatos asked, the next time Charon saw him, weeks and weeks later.
***
“You and Thanatos have it out again?” Hermes asked.
<Might’ve.>
Hermes is all right people; got a good work ethic, got a better heart. Tries to hide that though. Got an eye nearly as good as Charon’s for appraising; could have ended up with someone a lot worse paying for Zeus’ miscalculation on Sisyphus, Nyx's demand for a replacement while kid was laid up in bed.
Like she didn’t plan the whole mess. Like she hadn’t been looking for a way to neat split the twins up and keep her favourite exactly that.
“Mm,” Hermes hummed.
<This ain’t so many souls,> Charon said, since Hermes wasn’t sharing whatever that hum was meant to mean.
“I know,” Hermes said. “Odd, isn’t it?”
<Spit it out or keep it to yourself, but stop playing coy either way. Ain’t got the time for it.>
Hermes laughed.
“He’s hiding something,” Hermes said. “Just not sure what.”
***
“...has Thanatos said anything to you?” Hypnos asked.
He’d been sitting in the boat, chin on his knees. Real sitting, curled up. Worried.
<’Bout?> Charon asked.
“I don’t know. That’s the problem, isn’t it? I don’t know anything ever anymore. He doesn’t say.”
<Ain’t that the truth.> Charon set aside boons, reached for his oar. <Not said anything to me. Ain’t seen him lately.>
“You two fought again?” Hypnos asked, looking up from the river, brows knit and so much heartbreak that Charon didn’t want to see.
<Might’ve,> Charon said.
Braced for that sigh. Hypnos is a good kid; wants things to be all right. Easy. Wants things to go back to not being all the arguing again, hopes they might still even after all this time. Deserves so much better than what he’s got, not willing to ever think that.
“It’s just...” Hypnos shook his head, looked away again. Chewed his bottom lip, that face all worry he doesn’t much show to anyone. Always trying to be so much cheer. “I’m just worried about him.”
<Ain't we both,> Charon said, not a lie. He loves them both, no matter how complicated things are.
***
“And before you say I don’t think!” Hermes laughed, shaking his finger at Charon, “I know you’re thinking it, it’s right there, before you say I don’t—”
Stopped, head whipping to look up, but not the cave, the divine sort of up, black of his eyes so much light, missing his next step.
Charon caught him, steadied him.
“Ares,” Hermes said, gold of him gone pale, eyes all black again. “Thana—Where’s Hyp—”
Gone, slipped out of Charon’s hands, leaving cold behind.
***
Long time ago, before Olympus was a place that mattered, before there was a House, back when Nyx had her hands full enough to not spend most her time trying to sculpt perfection into her idea of it, Charon used to watch the twins. Not all the time, but sometimes. There weren't many safe places way back then—had the triplets' island, the space between Eris and Nemesis, Charon's boat—and the twins were...
Even after everything that's happened, even after the pieces that've gotten lost and the ones cut off, even after everything's settled down fixed just the way that pleases Nyx, even after, they're still...
He wishes he could have done more. Realized sooner. Wishes he'd known how to appraise a thing better back then, but they were all so young and so new and everything was always war and change and Titans terrified of the future.
Hypnos cried when he came back, long past the pleading and deep into the sorrow, snot and tears and ugly chest tearing sobs. Charon held him, held him like he used to hold the twins both when they got frightened, when they were smaller, but it was just Hypnos.
There was gold under Hypnos' nails. Death's sort of gold, a gold for a coin to start anew.
Charon held him—just Hypnos—and rocked him, face pressed to the soft mist of his curls, glad he couldn't weep.
Wanted to.
"I don't know what he did," Hypnos whispered, wet enough to drown, a lament enough for them both. "My own twin and I don't—"
It'd been so long since any of them'd reached for Than and he'd reached back. Hard to recognize it for what it was.
<Sh,> Charon said. <We'll figure it out.>
***
"Nothing's wrong," Thanatos murmured, slurred, alcohol hazy and leaned into Hypnos, bandage visible over his ribs.
"Maybe there's something a little unpleasant though?" Hypnos prompted, fingers scratching Thanatos' scalp. "A little annoying?"
Just them three. Just them three, Thanatos breathing shallow, Thanatos still pain tired. Couldn't remember the last time they'd all been together, better circumstances or not.
"...House, maybe," Thanatos said, not looking up. Eyes focused down, on tile all gold leaf and marble. Charon's nook of the world, safe. "Not—I just. It'd be nice, if people were—are you happy?"
"Course I am!" Hypnos says. "I've got you and Charon both and we're drinking like we haven't in ages. Don't worry, we're drinking enough for you, too."
"Do you think Zag is now? Going to the surface. Olympus? Are you? Mother always says..."
"I just said I am, didn't I? And Zag likes it a lot, he loves family. But what did it cost? You can tell us, you know that, Charon loves a good deal."
Thanatos' eyes flicking up, gleaming stars, looking at Charon. All that shame.
"Sorry," Thanatos said, voice so small, cracking. "I'm sorry. I’m—"
***
There's this island, long way out from everything. Long trip, though it gets shorter the closer a person gets; Charon doesn't make it often as he should nowadays, but he knows the triplets don't expect anything else.
It was Clotho waiting at the pier, kicking her feet. It would be; she's the one he gets, or gets him. Never quite been sure on that.
"Hi, little brother," Clotho said, smiling bright.
<Clotho.>
"Atropos thinks you're going to strangle Lachesis," Clotho said. "Lachesis thinks you're going to want to but won't do it."
<What do you think?>
"I think it's going to be fun to see who's right," Clotho said, catching the rope Charon tossed her.
Charon chuckled, stepped off the boat, and headed home.
***
Turned out there were people he wanted to shake more than Thanatos.
<Stop giving her chances on their bodies,> Charon snarled, more dark and fury than he’d been in a real long time, more vast.
“It is my right,” Lachesis said, light of her sharp enough to cut straight through the dark gathered up thick in the cottage. Cold enough. Just like Nyx that way, spitting image.
<She don’t deserve them, you think she just going to wake up one day, and what, realize we’re not just things to keep things working? That it?>
“Yes,” Lachesis said, hands folded so neat.
<They deserve better.>
“Yes,” Lachesis agreed calm, and he wanted, more than anything, to just—
“He chose this,” Atropos said.
Charon paused. Drew in a bit. Enough to see the gold of Atropos’ eyes gleaming like a coin fit to pay a toll.
<He what?>
“He chose this. He came here, he asked, he chose.”
<He didn’t know what—>
“He did.” Atropos smiled at him, bitter. She loves Thanatos, gets him best. She must've—she wouldn’t’ve been happy. “We told him.”
“It’s what he wants,” Clotho said soft, hand reaching out to rest on his shoulder.
“Shouldn’t have told him Nyx stopped talking to Hypnos,” Atropos said.
“When’s the last time he wanted anything?” Clotho asked. “Isn’t that enough, him wanting to change things? He never chooses.”
He wanted to cry. Settled for sitting down, instead, resting his face in his hands. It was just—he’d only ever wanted Thanatos to stop thinking Nyx was perfect, just wanted Thanatos to stop being gone so damn much, just wanted the twins—
“They’re together now,” Clotho said. “It’s what we all want, isn’t it?”
***
Which gets them back to here and now, Thanatos waiting for Hypnos to slip away from Zagreus and Olympus both so they can do the work they were made to do together. Like Charon wanted again, like Hypnos hoped might happen one day.
Except not like this.
He’s being quiet, Thanatos, running his fingers over a necklace woven gold certainty and tender hope, looping it around them only to shake it loose again. Not wearing that damn gauntlet.
The triplets didn’t take anything from Thanatos; they gave something back, different.
<You managing all right?> Charon asks.
Thanatos goes still, doesn’t look up. Draws in a bit.
“Yes.”
Goes quiet. Just rubbing a necklace between his fingers.
<Would you tell me if you weren’t?>
“...I don’t know.”
He’s a good kid, Thanatos. Wants to be with his whole soul. Charon should’ve... Should’ve a lot of things, but it’s too late. There’s just now, here, waiting for Hypnos with a younger brother who’s still, after everything, a good kid. Trying to be.
Charon sets his oar aside, crouches down so they’re level, so he can rest a hand on Thanatos’ arm. Tries not to mind the way Thanatos’ flinches. Still stings. Might be the only decent thing about Nyx never giving Charon a proper face.
<Talked to our sisters,> Charon says.
Thanatos nods, not looking up. Loops gold around his fingers, round and round and round.
<Said if you wanted, they’d take things back.>
Thanatos makes a fist; pulls that gold tight against his skin, turns it white. He lets go, slides the necklace off. Starts looping it again slow. Doesn’t answer.
<Got to be you, though.>
“I don’t,” Thanatos says so quiet Styx’s murmuring near swallows it up.
Charon wants to shake him, but it’s not... it’s not quite as angry. Not this time. Just maybe wants to get some of the words stuck in Thanatos’ chest shook loose.
“Do you hate me?” Thanatos asks. “For...”
Charon’s got rings on all his fingers, so much gold, but ain’t none of it got anything on Thanatos’ eyes when Charon reaches up, cradles Than’s face. Get him to look at him.
<Never hated you,> Charon says. <Just—>
Precious. Him and Hypnos both, matched set, one of a kind. Charon should have stolen them both when he had the chance. Wonders what might have happened. He didn’t, though. Just got this, here, now: Than’s face between Charon’s hands, stars slipping over his cheeks and pooling warm against Charon’s skin. Charon doesn’t remember Thanatos ever being warm.
Charon got what he wanted, even if it ain’t the way he wanted.
<Whatever happens from here,> Charon says careful, lot more careful than he was the last time him and Thanatos were talking, <just want you to know I’m proud of you trying. Even if you change your mind.>
Than’s a good kid. Wants to be, thinks he’s not.
Charon holds Thanatos as he cries, just the way he used to when something frightened him and Hypnos. Rocks him gentle, soothes, doesn’t mind the way Thanatos’ fisting his robes is tugging things all out of sorts.
Wishes he could cry a bit, too, really, but he ain’t perfect like the twins.
“What happened?” Hypnos cries aghast, and Charon can’t help laughing. Course Hypnos would come back to this.
<’S all right,> Charon promises. <Just clearing the air. C’mere.>
It ain’t how he wanted this to be, holding them both like he hasn’t in so long, Hypnos fussing and wiping Thanatos’ tears; it doesn’t need to be.
Important thing is that it is at all.